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Boyfriend has been diagnosed with relationship OCD, he has intrusive thoughts about me with past partners and always asks for affirmation How can I help him, and what should I do or not do

First of all, i want to say that i haven't been diagnosed yet, so the "maybe i don't have Ocd, maybe i'm just a monster" hits me harder then everything. I've become aware of this disorder thanks to social media, in a period of my life (around november) where i became to have very scary thoughts about harming myself or others, pedophile thoughts or simply ruminating about how i can open my mouth and scream, or closing and opeing my eyes repeteadly. So, i ran into a post about anxiety disorders and i read about Ocd for the first time. Also, i want to specify that when i was little i used to do things to reduce anxiety (if i check the stove, nothing bad will happen). But i always thought it was normal, and for many years i didn't do that since this year. I believe its a year of new things and stress for me, im dealing with a lot of things and so..anxiety has increased. I don't know who i am anymore, i mentally re-watch memories about myself 6 months ago and i'm a totally different person now. I feel like i'm an impostor, like this Is my true self came to the surface after all that i went through. Im dealing with a loss of identity. I don't know what i like anymore, if my thoughts before where this bad..if i'm a good person or not. I don't trust myself anymore, i have anxiety if i'm alone and i'm stressed if i'm with others. I've lost my happiness and my sparkle. I'm frightened i will do something bad to someone and enjoy It. I want to disappear and never come back again.

My OCD themes have centered mostly around health and identity stuff. For several years I’ve been afraid I’m Autistic. I’ve been in group OCD treatment for a bit and didn’t see too much improvement/ at least around my main obsession. I was seeing a NOCD therapist for a few months. One session he asked me some questions during an exposure and after I answered “yes” to most if not all the questions he told me that he googled questions to see if you’re Autistic. It was really uncomfortable, but part of me shrugged it off because I know that screening for Autism is much more comprehensive in the school system, so what happened didn’t feel that “validating” that I’m really Autistic. Although I still continued to obsess about the theme, I didn’t spend too much time thinking about that event. The other night for some reason it dawned on me that as an adult, I can likely go and get diagnosed Autistic and the screening process would probably, if not definitely, be less comprehensive than if I was a kid and in the school system. That realization made me feel that the series of 3-4 questions my therapist asked me can be effective screening for Autism and I answered yes to I think all the questions. Honestly I don’t know what to do, I know part of me really wants to research the process for being diagnosed Autistic as an adult in different type of medical, resource oriented, or psychiatric conditions to prove that my “screening” wasn’t comprehensive enough. I feel extremely defeated. I don’t know how to sit with this. It feels like it’s game over for me. I don’t know how I can EVER accept uncertainty around this theme now and just claim “I don’t know” if I’m Autistic and be able to just live my life and enjoy it without spending almost all day everyday obsessing about this and just never feeling “okay.” It’s like I can’t enjoy my life and ever feel “okay” for more than several minutes because my mind will just go back to “well, you’re for sure Autistic now” and it causes me so much despair and distress and I just NEVER want to think about it. I want so badly to show my mind that there are other explanations or even that the questions I answered yes to can probably be attributed to being diagnosed ADD and OCD, but it doesn’t help. My mind just wants to then see the criteria for ADD and if they don’t ask the same exact question then I know it’s Autism for sure. I just feel like now that I had this realization of the adult screening for Autism process being shorter that I have sealed my fate. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it for the last 4 days and I’m afraid I’ll never just have this reality of answering yes to those questions in my mind and I feel I can’t handle it.

Just want to say I think my favorite part of this healing journey is when I now feel my body/mind going off base (you know that extra spider sense for anxiety) and the anxiety comes on strong….I REALLY love telling that brat she can hang around if she wants but she is accompanying ME for the day I will NOT be accompanying her! I’m really proud of myself as stress is a huge trigger for me and Easter Sunday is the anniversary of my initial PTSD inducing event (won’t elaborate to help minimize others triggers)✌🏽🌻. Also watched two episodes of Criminal Minds and I’m fine. Shut the ruminating down immediately. Also watched Batman and I’m fine. I am a conqueror of Harm/self harm OCD and Existential/Religious OCD which are my top two among many other changing OCD themes.

How can you tell if you're experiencing real event ocd or you are feeling justified guilt for doing something bad. What I did is something that everyone would consider very bad. Is it still OCD? This is making me miserable.

My bf and I (ex bf idk how to explain) we been broken up/on a break for a month. The first 2 weeks was hard as fuck and I was worried and losing it. Then eventually I accepted it and just said fuck this and we didn’t speak for the entire 3rd week. Like at all. The first 2 weeks we still were in contact a bit. So going on week 4 today. Marks a whole month. Last week though we did meet up and talk and decided we both didn’t wanna get back together right now and just aren’t there yet, we weren’t officially done but still not like together. After I just told him like tbh it’s all good we can just take our time, no rush, we both obviously don’t wanna go back to how the relationship was well just see if we wanna go through it together or give it up. After that, he started to text me every day up til today which marks a month. He FaceTimes again (we did that all the time) just overall talking to me more and more. So today I just said like are u trying to just like talk and see how it goes and he’s like yes that’s how I do things. And I was like wow I just guessed that. he said he still didn’t know if he wanted to get back together. He just didn’t know. I had been in that same boat all week too and evidently I decided I wanted to be with him. But I can’t rlly be mad that he didn’t decide at the same time as me. And I think him wanting to talk to me more and see me and all of that is a sign he is trying to go back to us which he sort of pointed out. Like we’re working through it kind of thing. And in my head I’m just thinking ok I’m going to play this out for the next week and a half. See how it goes. He is the one who reaches out to me constantly, it’s always been like that. But like if I don’t see rlly much effort or change in that time, I HAVE to walk away. I even said like to him like I know I’m worth it and I’m enough and blah blah. Just sort of putting my foot down saying it’s cool if we work to get there but I wanna make sure we’re on the same page. I am kinda annoyed with it for sure. But I also know we both process things differently. He doesn’t wanna have a sit down and a huge talk and decide ok we date now or we done. He wants to get back to it by talking again and hanging out and just taking our time gettin back to each other which in all honesty I think is a good idea. It can be hard but like ur rebuilding something in a way by doing that and can see if ur even able to… idk I think I’m just sad cuz I fucking miss him so much that I do wish he just wanted to see me so bad he came back but he has a huge ego sometimes he doesn’t realize and I think he puts up this huge wall where he thinks he has to do these things. And I just wanna open my arms and be like wooo come back.

Tw: I wish my TikTok wouldn’t be so triggering. Just saw a video of a woman who came out as a lesbian despite being married 8 years to a man and said “the closet was DEEP”. I’m just so scared that’s going to be me. I don’t want it. I’m so scared. Urgh:/ sorry

Hello my name is Brandon and I just want to make a long story short and straight to the point. I struggled with Harm OCD, Self Harm OCD, and Scrupulosity. I didn’t know who I was anymore and It just seemed like my life was over. Constant depression, anxiety, fears, doubts and overthinking every single day of my life. I decided to try out NOCD and I got paired with a wonderful Therapist by the name of Lynda. She was able to guide me and understand what OCD really is and how to battle it. I was able to go back to “normal” but the thoughts seemed to come back although I was able to manage them much better based on the skills my therapist provided me with. I was stuck in the cycle of trying to “figure it out” and what all these thoughts meant about me. I would ask “did I think that?” “Do I like these thoughts because the anxiety isn’t as strong anymore?” “Are these my thoughts or OCD?” But It wasn’t until I gave my life to Christ and grew my relationship with Him where I experience permanent healing. I want to give ALL the glory to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Jesus loves you and wants the best for you. No matter what you have done in your past it can all be wiped away by his amazing grace and his great mercy. Jesus loves you and wants to heal you!! Matthew 8:2-3 “Suddenly, a man with leprosy approached him and knelt before him. “Lord,” the man said, “if you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean.” Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing,” he said. “Be healed!” And instantly the leprosy disappeared.” Isaiah 43:25 “I—yes, I alone—will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.” Jeremiah 30:17 “But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds, declares the LORD.” Romans 5:8 “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.” John 10:10 “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” Revelation 21:4 “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” Malachi 1:2 “I have always loved you,” says the Lord.” Jeremiah 1:5 “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.” Genesis 28:15 “What’s more, I am with you, and I will protect you wherever you go. One day I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have finished giving you everything I have promised you.” The devil, our enemy knows the greatness and the purpose God has For YOU, he is afraid of what you can become in Jesus. He doesn’t want you to be healed. HE IS A LIAR, Confess your sins to him and give him your life. Accept him as your Lord and Savior and have faith in who He is and what he did at the Cross for all of us. Jesus died for you at cross for the forgiveness of yours sins, to give you eternal life!!, to bring you back to God, Because he LOVES US! Jesus WANTS ALL your brokenness, your addictions, your fears, your anxieties, your depression, your thoughts, your fears, your OCD.. HE WILL TAKE ALL OF IT AWAY!! I would like to introduce you to a great resource my Church provides. If you need prayer please text “prayer” to 512-359-3400 and someone will be ready to contact you. They are any time and any day. Please message me as well if you need prayer at 512 393-9082. If Jesus Christ did it for me.. HE CAN DO IT FOR YOU

Suicidal OCD is truly horrible. There’s so much overlap between ideation and obsession with this. A sufferer truly can’t tell the difference because of all of the conflicting information between the two. ERP for this makes it difficult because it’s like, you “accept” the thoughts, but yet if you do that, you’re also told to seek help immediately. How do you sit with these thoughts, and also how do you get on the other side of this when you’re instructed to react the complete opposite regarding this topic? I feel like I go in circles because of this and it’s so hard to judge.

I just want it to stop. I sometimes feel anxiety around my own boyfriend and I don't know what to do. I hope it doesn't mean we aren't right for each other. 😓 I just want to spend time with him without this feeling again and I don't know what to do.

I am here because I have no friends who I can talk to about my intrusive thoughts. It has come to a point where it is all I can think of 24/7 from the moment I wake until I go to bed. The thoughts persist no matter the time of day, just at different volumes. In some instances, I can focus and do the tasks that are needed at hand while having the thoughts as background noise, and other times it feels like they get so loud I can't focus on anything else. OCD has taken over my life, my friends, and now I feel like my sanity is slowly leaving my body. I tried doing ERP today, which typically works during my sessions, but it felt like I gave up. I went into ruminating and googling and stopped until I physically could not take the overwhelming amount of anxiety. My thoughts centered around my sexuality. What if I am gay? What if I am forcing my relationship with my fiance? What if I never loved him? What if I faked everything? What if me being distanced - physically and emotionally mean I am gay? What if I am using OCD as an excuse? What if my mom was right? (she would always tell me growing up that God told her I was gay). With ERP, I was trying to watch TikToks of this woman who considers herself a "late-blooming lesbian" meaning she had been married to a man and had a child before she came out. I tried to lean into the anxiety but my brain just started instantly comparing, spiraling, ruminating...Sometimes I would reassure myself and sometimes I would question why I didn't feel anxious for a second (that it meant it was true). When I first went into ERP, I did not think about how difficult it was just to simply say "maybe so, maybe not." Very Brief Background: My mother has very chronic and untreated paranoid Schizophrenia which consists of delusions (made-up thoughts like government going after her or Johnny Depp loved her) and hallucinations (visual perception that is not there - seeing demons, dead people, usually she would attach spirituality into things she saw). Anyways she would say I was a lesbian and that she needed to keep me away from my sister because God told her I was capable of terrible things. I grew up confused and remembered my mom making fun of me whenever I would be vocal about having a crush on a guy...she would tell me I was faking it and in denial. I think this most definitely has led me into the position I am in today.

Don't get me wrong, I keep going because I wouldn't want to cause any hurt to anyone-none of us can just leave this world without upsetting those closest to us & I don't want to do that. But I'm starting to lose hope. I'm back living with my parents after a relationship breakdown & have been trying to rent a house in the UK where I live. But they discriminate against me because I'm on sickness benefits due, mostly, to this terrible illness. And I've tried to get therapy but the Mental Health services are literally ignoring my case, despite my GP sending countless emails to them to help me- I first got in touch with them because I had nearly followed through with a serious suicide attempt due to the OCD I've been struggling with for years. Therefore, I've not even got the choice to be able to get better with therapy- I can't afford to go private or even NOCD-- I'm completely broke. So, I'm stuck being unable to work/contribute to society, landlords won't accept me as a tenant & worse of all I'll never get better. But if anything, I hope this reminds someone out there that they are not alone. P.s. I think someone should start an awareness campaign for Real Event OCD for the public, as I think it should be a separate diagnosis & is the worst thing I've ever experienced.

Every time I’m around or see my dog the urge to hurt him is so real. I don’t have anxiety right now and every time I pass him it feels like I’m going to do it. I have no control and just know I’m going to snap

Has anyone dealt with Scrupulosity?

Can anyone tell me difference about certainty and confidence.. Eveyone says that everyone get doubting intrusive thought about past and future but they are able to live with uncertainty and move forward with confidence .. I also get thought about past or things just happened a hour ago , my mind tells things that something bad happened or someone hurt you and i know thats my imagination and i am also confident , but i didnt get satisfaction.. but i know if i ruminate it will get worse and i well get nothing from it .. So living with uncertainty is the only solution and does really every person leave with this... This thing always confuses me please help me this...

I’m so tired of my own head picking me to pieces.. it’s relentless the constant thoughts of disgust and hatred I have for myself. I just want to sleep

I’ve been so tired lately my anxiety is so crazy my ocd triggers in my home make me feel like I’m just surrounded by contaminates I feel like I’m in constant stress I want to leave to get away from the house but get nervous bout leaveing my home and then I no I gotta come back here I can’t seem to get off my phone to lay down I just keep prolonging it till it’s so late I make myself lay down then I’m up all nite I wake up round 4 to 5 in the evening I’m still exhausted and I gotta do it all over again I love wit my bf who is aware of my ocd and wat has caused me stress lately but since it’s been 3 months since the contaminate was brought into my home I think he feels like it’s over for me but it’s still contaminated to me and trying to avoid haveing objects not touch the contaminated stuff in my home is impossible I’m just so stressed and I no my bf try’s to help he bought me an old vacuum from the thrift store to use instead of mine so I don’t contaminate my vacuum and have to clean it everytime I use it and I’m glad he was thinking of me but I don’t want to vaccum the contaminated carpet I feel like it’s just rolling over contaminates and just spreading everywere on the carpet I had to pretend I liked it and had to vacuum otherwise he would’ve vacuumed and vacuumed in places I wouldn’t want him to contaminate I no it sounds like he’s helping but he’s not and some stuff bothers me like certain sprays and other stuff and I told him all my ocd stuff that I can’t help it untill I get help and I’ve told him several times like I can’t use this and that cause my ocd he eventually zoned out and doesn’t listen so when he brings stuff here that I don’t like and does stuff nice for me I just pretend I’m glad i had to pretend prior to me telling him bout my ocd I’ve had to pretend I don’t like certain foods and drinks and clothes cause my ocd affects those things if I open a present and it’s clothes that are a color I can’t wear I just pretend witout even thinking but deep down I’m so sad that I can’t tell them I can’t wear it that I’m upset my ocd is so stupid and hard on me that I can’t wear a piece of clothing for so many years I’ve had to do things as if I was normal and like it doesn’t bother me but I’m my head all these things just upset me and bother my ocd years of pretending even touching stuff that my ocd doesn’t like something that I feel like I need to wash my hands when I touch I have to pretend and just touch it and panick till I can wash my hands I just thought when I told everyone bout all my ocd that it’s make it easier and have less triggers by others but it’s just the same I’m just so tired I tried for months to get ocd help but there’s nothing near me and nowere that accepts my insurance it made me feel even worse calling places explaining over and over again bout my ocd and just being denied now I’m in bed late I’m wakeing up late my bf switched from seconds to third shift so I’m up on his schedule I can’t get up to try to call anywere if I don’t get rest my anxiety’s worse I finally ended up going to the mental health place we’re I live which none of them are trained to treat ocd they just prescribe an antidepressant and move on they put me on 2 different meds in a couple weeks changed my first one in just a few days of takeing it the next meds made me sick for weeks so that made everything worse I just went there to just start something to make myself feel better till I could get into an ocd place I can’t try to tackle my ocd feeling like this if I could just get medication to help me relax help me leave my fucking home give me some relief so I don’t feel like my entire body’s tense and feel sick all the time from my anxiety I could atleast get some relief now I’m so tired of my ocd of myself of my life of these stupid doctors who can’t medicate me who can’t understand ocd and it’s being a crippling anxiety illness I just wish I had someone here wit ocd someone to call like they do in na classes for drug addicts like a sponser it shouldn’t be this hard tp get help I shouldn’t feel so alone I shouldn’t have to pretend that I’m normal and that things don’t bother me I shouldn’t have to get special help cause these doctors aren’t trained in treating ocd when is things gonna get better for ppl wit ocd.

Some OCD specialists and online therapy companies may offer face-to-face sessions, but most don’t provide support between sessions at no additional cost. At NOCD, we know that the hardest part of your treatment journey is the 99% of your week when you aren’t in sessions with your therapist. Outside of therapy is when you need the most support, because OCD episodes can be triggered at any time. That’s why we offer extra support between therapy sessions at no extra cost. In between your therapy sessions, you have free access to: Messaging with your therapist - when things get tough between sessions, you can message your therapist conveniently and confidentially using the NOCD platform. In-app self-help tools - the NOCD app has an SOS tool for help during OCD episodes, as well as exercises to aid your progress through ERP therapy. Peer support - as a NOCD Therapy member, you can join therapist-led support groups, gain unlimited access to peer communities of others with OCD, and connect with a Peer Advisor who has gone through NOCD Therapy to support you as you start your journey. NOCD’s free between-sessions support helps you stay on the path to recovery, even when you’re not in a session with your therapist. Book a free call with our team to learn more about working with a NOCD therapist and gaining access to between-sessions support.

How does someone with Real event ocd deal with the urge to confess? Like how do you prevent yourself from confessing the event to your partner? This dilemma is making me suicidal, please help.

does dealing with rocd thoughts ever actually get better, not sure if they are even just thoughts anymore