Welcome to
the NOCD Community

I really need some and advice. I have just discovered that I suffer from POCD and I have yet to seek treatment. This has been eating up for the past two days now. I'm not attracted to children in the slightest bit. And my fiance doesn't know. I'm afraid that he will leave me. I can't tell my parents because they wouldn't understand. I am not a pedophile. But I'm afraid that I might become one. Please help urgently.

I’m angry. Irritated. Whatever. I’m in a day program and yesterday they’re freaking out because I was open about my harm ocd. The dr I saw yesterday in the afternoon that wasn’t my actual doctor talked to me and told them it’s just ocd. Today my actual doctor told me to TELL MY FATHER THE THOUGHTS I GET OF STABBING HIM AND MY MOM IN THEIR SLEEP. Because “I don’t think he’d understand if he heard it from me” ME EITHER. Why the HELL would you give meaning to my thought?! Why would you make me tell him?! There’s no purpose, he’s an idiot! He was like “so you get thoughts of murdering us in our sleep” and said “should I be ready”. And then my dumb self mentioned my pocd while trying to explain ocd to him. ?‍♀️ He’s “trying” to be better then he used to be but he still pisses me off. I miss my best friend, I used to trust her with this stuff. I hate talking about my dad to anyone else.

I called another ocd specialist office and they did a screening to see if it was actually where I needed to be treated and one of her questions was if I thought the government was after me which I don’t and now idk if my mind is playing a trick on me and just anything that could do with government keeps coming up and now I’m wondering if it’s early schizophrenic symptoms or maybe it’s one of my triggers

Can someone give me some advice

been having a groinal response for like three days straight. at what point do i see a doctor because im starting to worry that it won't ever go away

I love to day dream, about different scenarios, different people! Just fun stuff. It’s calming, but then ... I’ll turn it into, if I’m day dreaming all the time I’m not fully living my life... and maybe I do this because I’m not really happy with my real life... and I should feel bad because I’m never fully present... which makes me a terrible person - AND THEN WHAT IF- Anyone else have this issue? How do you relax, because it’s exhausting?

Anyone else feel like they are going to get schizophrenia and be a crazy person?

Can’t stop thinking of things from years ago. Like I’ve already gone through it and moved on but now my brain likes the what if questions and doubting my entire memory of the situation and twisting it to something dark. I confess to my mother usually and once I’m on a roll it’s hard to stop. Either I tell her nothing or everything that comes to my mind. I was upset about something from 6 years ago, talked it out with mom and now a new memory popped up and that is the new obsession until I talk it out. Horrible!! I can’t live like this.

Does anyone else feel that OCD can be defeated with mindset adjustment ? It’s pretty clear that I suffer from negative thoughts and have severe self doubt and uncertainty. It’s like I don’t even know my own identity. Over the past few days I’ve become more confident in myself by not caring what others think of me. The effects on my mood were very unusual but much appreciated. It’s almost like we can teach our brains new thought patterns. Anyone feel the same or heard stories of similar value?

Really been struggling with std obsession (I’m sure most people have seen by now) I CANNOT seem to fully accept I’m fine? I had have all negative tests, Then a symptom will appear and I feel like the tests need to be done again, despite doctors and nurses and sexual health helpline workers telling me it’s unnecessary and o need help with anxiety. It feels SO possible that I have an std that will ruin my relationship with the love of my life I’m a constant MESS I look gross because I don’t care about my appearance anymore, my work suffers I’m sad all the time and my irritation levels are through the roof and everything feels trivial until I get this sorted. I just wanna know I’m fine. I’m going on holiday with him next week and I’m TERRIFIED because my last relationship I was immediately abandoned by him when we returned too. I feel like to relax is to be negligent and there’s a risk of passing on an std unless I get tested yet again, despite them all telling me I don’t need to I sometimes can think rationally, but then the thoughts creep in again and I’m back at square one. I feel helpless.

Can somebody hear me out please,? This is such a weird obsession.. But I just wanna talk about it. Please tell me how to deal with this obsession?? Ok so whenever I'm at home I sometimes decide to just walk to the kitchen to grab something. But while my hands are down, near my pockets, I'm afraid that I'm gonna touch my dad or my brothers penis.. Ok this is weird..So now i actually did touch and now I'm really worried. Groinal responses are crazy, my ocd tells me that I liked the feeling of touching a penis and is telling me that I'm gay... Now I'm freaking out.. Please help please tell me how do i make this anxiety subside???

Not sure if this is normal, but all of a sudden, like within days, it seems as though my OCD is completely gone and I’m really confused. Any advice or experience with this would be great. Thanks

Do some of you have the same problem ⁉️ I don’t see myself as very beautiful and boys hardly recognize me and never ask me for a date and my HOCD tells me that „women definitely would ask you for a date“ and that I will never get a boyfriend so I should go with women. I always knew I never had a relationship because of my very (!) low self esteem but now my HOCD tells me that’s because of my HOCD.

Are nights the worst for anyone else? In the past week I’ve only gotten 3 hours tops of sleep per night (and it’s not even good sleep) because I keep on convincing myself I have a serious Illness of some kind. It makes the day time worse as well because I can’t focus on the things I need to do because my body is tired. I feel like if I just have a good nights sleep things will be better mentally but I can’t. It’s the absolute worst.

Hi guys, I've been diagnosed with anxiety, depression and a (quite light) OCD. One of my passion is writing and I would like my next short story to be about a character living with severe OCD. Does anyone have any testimonies, advice or things they'd like to share? Thank you :)

Does anyone know why ocd still finds ways to dispute facts? I’ve had so much confirmation I don’t have STDs and my brain still finds ways to pick holes in it, and convince me I have reasons to be scared, why is this? I have tangible proof I’m okay and I STILL can’t fully relax?! I don’t get it I thought when I had std tests I’d be instantly fine

I’m about to start Zoloft and I’m feeling very nervous about the possible side effects, especially because my doctor said it can cause sleep disruption and I get anxiety about if I’ve slept enough. I’m going to be taking it at night- has anyone gone onto Zoloft? What side affects did you experience?

Hi all Just wanted to say how helpful this community has been as a source for information and support. My wife has suffered from Contamination OCD for over a decade now and has tried CBT government and private courses at great cost, Well being courses, erp we’ve even moved house due to its horrendous effects. She’s had SSRI drugs before without success and then was put onto Clomipramine for a while which tempered her for some time even though the amounts taken have gradually increased to 200mg. Which I know is a lot. The problem though is that now they seem to have stopped working it’s like just stopped. Which has meant all her old rituals have come back with a vengeance, plus a horrible depression has enveloped her. She’s super sensitive irritable etc as you would imagine and it’s a great stress for us all as well as our children. Living together as a family with a contamination OCD is a nightmare. Question : she is going to therapist next week (she is) but they have Been reluctant to prescribe anything for the super anxiety she’s now has the depression or the super mood swings she has. Surely she needs something to take the edge of whilst attempting therapy again. Doesn’t the NICE guidelines say that an anti psychotic drug can be sometimes prescribed or another drug introduced alongside the Clomipramine ? Would really appreciate any experience or advice . And yes I’m aware it’s different for everybody. Many thanks in advance

Rewriting, when I was 15-16, I didn’t know what masturbation was, my friend who’s the same age as me introduced me to those things, they also introduced me to hentai and would show me sh*ta and idk why they would but they said they showed all their friends that. They’ve apologized for it but I still obsess for just seeing it. At the time we also watched an anime fad that was a joke but it was also sh*ta and we did stuff after. I feel disgusted from back then. I am 22 now and I’ve spoken to my therapist about this. We both agree I was a child and I didn’t know better, and that it was drawn and fictional, especially because I didn’t know what masturbation even was until I was 15-16, I dunno I’ve been obsessing so bad lately about it. I’m scared those past mistakes haunt me. One time I went on my tumblr nsfw blog (I more so masturbate out of compulsion, I am asexual.) I had a pic in my likes but it was hentai, the tags were in Japanese and I translated them and one of the tags said sh*ta and I freaked out. This was way back then as well, probably 17? Also when I had just turned 17 I started “going out” with someone on a website that shall not be named and 2 months in, I barely spoke to them so we never even conversated much at all, we role played like once her favorite character feeding her and it was dumb and it never got anywhere and like after a while of barely even talking to them I said wait how old are you and they said they would be 14 soon and I ghosted them. I don’t remember specifics. I just know I’ve told my therapists, all the ones I’ve had this and all of them say I did nothing wrong. I’m just tired, everything’s been bothering me so badly because my best friend left me and she was always my reassurance. She always told me I never did anything wrong. I know reassurance is bad, it’s something I’ve struggled with all my life. I just dunno what to do anymore. My brain has decided to obsess over these things as of late...I’ve been wanting to disappear because of it, it’s been debilitating me to the core. Can’t play games, can’t do anything. On top of feeling like crap cause my best friend and I started a “break”. Guilt resides in my stomach, therapists reassuring me over and over again obviously do nothing, I wish I knew how to deal with these things. I want my innocence back! I want a do over.

I have been dwelling on the same thing since February. It’s awful. It feels suffocating. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I hate myself for it