Welcome to
the NOCD Community

Does anyone else have a form of SOOCD / HOCD in which you worry about your appearance / interests? More recently I’ve started not caring at all about making myself look nice. Truthfully, I feel awful a lot of the time because of this. I look in the mirror and think I’m ugly. But on top of this thought I also think, “I look gay”, “I look like a lesbian”, etc. Then, it morphs into other thoughts such as, “Wait, I don’t care about makeup anymore? I must be gay”, “I don’t care as much about fashion anymore? I must be gay”, “I don’t feel like I can easily connect with other girls when they talk about “girly” things? I must be gay”, “I don’t like as many “girly” things as I used to? I must be gay”. On top of this, I also create false memories from my past of me faking being girly to fit a certain standard. I’m TIRED of it. Of course, I know straight women only liking girly things is a big stereotype, but it’s enough to scare the shit out of me.

What do you do when a compulsion no longer relieves the anxiety? My pocd is giving me hell. Lately my pocd has focused on child pornography and the google compulsion I’ve had isn’t relieving the anxiety. Before just searching the term was enough to clear the get rid of the anxiety and I was always left with the feeling of guilt that I’d done something wrong and that I was gonna be jailed for it. I never want to see the actual thing and I’ve been trying to resist the google compulsion but I feel like I’m not strong enough no matter how hard I try. I want feel like such a monster for it. What do you guys suggest I do?

For people who have experienced successes with SSRI’s or other antidepressants, what symptoms did they treat? The intrusive thoughts, anxiety, compulsions, all of it? I have tried other ssri’s in the past, with moderate success in reducing anxiety, but it didn’t reduce the unwanted thoughts. However, at that time, the theme of my intrusive thoughts weren’t as troublesome. So while the thoughts still existed, it didn’t limit my functionality. I feel like even if a new SSRI reduces my anxiety and compulsions, but not the intrusive thoughts, that I will not return to the functionality I had just a short time ago.

I suffer from TOCD and ı have a question.What does it mean to feel like a girl? I'm a girl but I feel neither like a boy nor a girl.Does that mean I'm not a cisgender female?

I've been realizing that to keep going and act on values in the face if uncertain feelings is a huge commitment. It's like accepting yeah I may be "wrong" but this is what I'm gonna do cause I need to strengthen my self trust. It's so effing hard. My heart goes out to others dealing with SOOCD within a committed relationship like I am. On top of it all I am bisexual so this feels like an eternal mindfuck but somewhere within my values I know the beginning of this relationship was so good that I didnt care ir obsess over what gender my partner is not did I obsess over what exact sexuality I am. I have hope in that, but at the same time, sometimes a day with ocd is a hopeless day. My heart goes out to all who can relate. <3

I got prescribed zoloft and so scared to take it. I was up reading all these horror stories and now I'm so scared to take it.

Lately in therapy, I’ve learned how OCD doesn’t come unless there is general anxiety first. It helps me to think about what I’m actually anxious about when i start thinking irrationally with OCD. My goal right now is to feel anxious without it flipping into OCD. OCD only makes me feel some what in control when i feel helplessly anxious. It’s all a lie!

Someone please help! I feel like crying. I had an argument with my sister regarding something. I play this online game called yo world on fb and I met someone on there who also lives near me. We are close friends and she’s a girl and I’m thinking about meeting her. My ex was really toxic which traumatised me really badly and made me want to end my life. she was a girl. However I was on soo many pills because off my intrusive thoughts and anxiety that i wasn't aware of my own actions( whether i really liked her) or just wanted someone to be with me to not feel alone. i told my sister i am planning to meet up with this girl however were just good friends. i guess my sister is right about bringing someone over just to chill after meeting them once however i got really upset when my sister said that as i started to believe that she was stopping me from meeting someone and make friends. my mum got involved after i argued with my sister and said why i was getting so upset and thought i was meeting this girl ( for something else) however after my last relationship it left me questioning about my sexuality it was my first one. i don't know whether I'm bisexual or not cause whenever i watch programmes with good-looking guys i get attracted and happy. i have liked guys before. my mum is like so your bisexual means u want to be with a guy and a girl in a relationship at the same time? now i cant stop thinking about what if i want to be with two people at the same time? i'm getting scared. this thought happened after my mum said that. i don't even know if I'm bisexual or not. i feel really embarrassed having this thought. i searched on the internet. 'confused about my sexuality and lgtb came up. i saw the wore trans gender and starting thinking what if im transgender . i don't want these thoughts. i just want to be free. i can't stop thinking about my sexuality. i feel that i never liked guys when i did??? why is my brain making me feel like this. : (

Hi, I understand the legal and judicial paperwork, financial stuff and so on. But I speak English as close to native as one can, and there are many people who have basic understanding of it to be able to access people who can understand ocd, which, when you look at it many people can't. I live in eastern Europe, and I understajd the anglophone basis of this app, but why not also offer paid services to people suffering in areas outside the US, UK and the commonwealth? If anything they're much much well off than the place I live in.

My therapist is saying that if I have a thought that I've thrown away something valuable (my watch, wallet, credit cards, money, etc.), that the exposure would actually be throwing away my valuables. I'm just confused because I thought the goal of ERP was to sit with the thought & not do the compulsion (check). Not to actually make our thoughts become real...

is anybody else tired of this? the overthinking and the constant NEED to do compulsions. im really over it [ also ive been posting a lot bc i’ve been home and bored all day ]

TW I just learned a few minutes ago that searching the phrase “child pornography” on google can get you arrested because it can go into your browsers cache and then it’s considered possession of child pornography. Now I’m terrified because I’ve searched that a lot recently on a ocd compulsion binge especially since my ocd has turned to sexual taboo stuff. I never searched it to actually see anything. I think child pornography is awful. I just felt like that was the only way to get rid of the feeling of anxiety.

Just did an exposure and my anxiety is high. It feels so real :(

This could trigger schizo ocd, so please be mindful of this post. Just now I read a post talking about the fear of being schizophrenic, and for these past week I've been obsessing that I'd be arrested for a mistake and my life would be ruined. After reading the post, I was like: was this a delusion? Delusions and paranoia are symptoms of this terrible mental illness (schizophrenia), and I got so scared of losing my touch with reality and being dependent of someone's care for the rest of my life.. what if I start hallucinating about bringing harm to people? What if my family gives up on me? And then it hit me, could this be another delusion? I started crying and wondering if I could have it, and what it'd mean for my future self. I feel like both have something to do with my life being ruined, as I'm still very young and just now am orientating myself towards my adulthood. It just got too much, and I asked my mom to set an appointment with a psychologist. The professional I have in mind isn't an ocd specialist, though, so I'm so scared about being misdiagnosed.. anyone got any advice?

Can ocd be cured permanently?or symptoms are just minimised by medication and therapy sessions

I finally got prescribed zoloft. I also nervous taken it because I've heard so many bad stories even from people know. Can I hear everyone's stories from zoloft. Weather good or bad?

I don't think I will ever progress as a human being. I haven't even turned 15 yet and I've wasted the last 2 years of my life in constant dismay Even if i overcome my agony, I still have to look back at wasting lockdown, my journey into adolescence/high school, finishing grade 7 and everything else as me just being worrried. Is it ever going to get better?

How do you tell your boyfriend/so about sexual orientation ocd? I told him about ocd but I have yet to tell him my theme I’m worried as of how he’s gonna react

What do you do to help you when your depression gets really bad and you don’t feel like you belong in this world? I don’t want to hurt myself I’m just in lots of pain.

I’m curious, what is the internal dialogue others with HOCD/SOCD have within their mind? I’m curious if others think putting out their thoughts in writing might help them realize their not alone Mine: “Did I just check that guy out” “Am I attracted to him” “Yeah, he’s a good looking guy, does that mean I’m gay” “You’re gay and just not admitting it” “When are you going to tell people your gay” “Do you feel attracted to them” “Is this anxiety or feeling of desire”.