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the NOCD Community

Hey everyone so one thing I was wondering is what people do with items they think are contaminated. I know I will never use the item again but I don’t wanna throw it away. I’m unsure of what to do?? :(

I had dentist appointment yesterday and I had so much panic attack I tried to control my anxiety but it got worse my mind kept telling to run outside and cancel my appointment but I sit there I told my mind nope I need my teeth done so if something happens then let it happen I accept the anxiety and it went away but I felt terrible after when I got home I see I got a little cut inside my lips and tongue then I got worry what if I get hiv from that I had to google if dentist clean their tools or use new one I m still afraid that will get a serious issue also I have tmj flare up I didn’t want to do my teeth because of the fear of what if that cause me more tmj or other issue no reassurance just telling you how was my day yesterday

How do you deal with ocd and laundry. Sometimes I forget I put laundry detergent in. I fight my ocd and put the clothes in the dryer but then I freak out briefly that I didn’t put detergent in and ruined the dryer. I wish I could have a camera to record me putting detergent in. Also, does anyone battle washing something potentially contaminated with other clothing. What do you tell yourself to get over these irrational thoughts

Hi, I’m Cede. I am 15 years old and I’m greatly concerned if I have OCD. I do so many things that relate to others with OCD, and find myself constantly matching symptoms of it. But I feel like if I bring this up to my mother she will tell me I’m making it all up in my head, or say something stupid like “it’s because of that darn phone” I was hoping to find people here who do have OCD and see what their thoughts are. And hopefully find my answer. These things have been happening as long as I can remember. They started out as a few things but now they’re building and getting worse. Stuff I do that I believe is OCD related: -When I was younger and believed in good and praying, I would have to triple check I prayed for all my family and friends. Or I thought they would die. I would panic every night. (Age 4-9?) -When praying I would also pray that specific things wouldn’t happen to me. Ex: “dear god, please don’t let me get kidnapped tomorrow” -I got into a car crash when I was younger while I was asleep, ever ever since then I wouldn’t allow myself to fall asleep because I thought me sleeping caused us to crash -I would (still do) see the spray paint on cement and imagine if the line extended. I would have to avoid those spots or I’d feel panicked or think a bad thing was soon to come -I skip count by 2’s, 5’s, and 10’s when anxious, or something like it. -I have to hold my breath while crossing the street because I think something bad will happen if I breathe before I’m across -I have to run half way across a street before a certain light changes otherwise I’m convinced Doom is released upon me -I will randomly feel dirty in my body. Typically my hands. I will wash and wash them till the “bad” is gone. -I have the habit of over showering because I feel like when I sleep “bad” is layered all over me and showering will get it off -when making a timer for something it needs to only be “good” numbers (minutes) with a “good”number for the seconds. Ex: 11 min and 44 seconds -Numbers, Colors, Letters, and shapes all are split into feeling “good” or “bad” ex: 6 is very bad. It’s like a dirty feeling almost -I refuse to go into stores that feel “bad” or “dirty”. Like the AIR feels dirty to me, even if I know it’s clean -If I push my bedroom door shut before it closes I need to run to a carpet and stand on only my right leg or get to my stairs or I feel like something bad will happen -I will rewrite a letter or something till it feels it’s done “just right” -when walking on tiles I can’t step on lines. But also I don’t like how they’re spaced. My right foot is always stepping on one part of them and my left on another. It’s not fairly balanced. And that causes me to rewalk or step there again. And it causes me to panic and sometimes tear up. -if I only get one hand wet I need to get the other just as wet before drying them off or I can’t leave the place I’m in. -if one nail breaks on one hand ex:pointer on right, I need to cut the other one down to that length as well. Or I can’t function -when I’m sick I convince myself I’m going to die in my sleep (I’m literally sick rn and refusing to go to bed because I’m convinced my family will find me dead) -I have asthma and I sometimes think it gets so bad I’ll want to write “I love you” notes to my family because I’m going to die from not breathing in my sleep -I think I forgot something so I have to check it a few times to make sure I have it or done something -I won’t take medication unless my mother gets it for me, because I think I’ll accidentally over dose. And sometimes I’ll be worried to take it even from her (Tw for these because they’re intrusive thoughts) -I’ll be looking at my dog or a little kid and have the most vivid and violent visions of them. Ex: I will see myself bashing my dogs brain with my foot -I will have intrusive thoughts if me specializing myself to older adults, even family. Like guys. I don’t even want to give an example because it’s disgusting.. -I’ll get intrusive thoughts of me unaliving myself and writing su’cide letters to people -I will get an intrusive thought of me taking too much medication There’s still so much, but I’m sick and tired. If anyone who has OCD can let me know if it sounds like I have it please tell me. I want to figure this out. Have a good day! -Cd

How do you guys deal with emotional contamination?

My contamination ocd has been awful lately. My hands are completely raw from washing, I'm out of hand sanitizer so I have to wash them all the time. I'm constantly rewashing clothes and changing my clothes because they feel dirty so I can't wear them anymore, and it's so stressful because I don't know what to do about it anymore. I go through an entire bottle of soap in less than a week, and some people are getting really mad about it. My hands hurt and I'm stressed out and I have no idea what to do.

I’ve always had a feeling of having OCD but I’ve never been sure. I’m a teenager, and I’m hoping people on this app can help me try to figure out if I have OCD or I’m just crazy. Starting off with these terrible thoughts I have all the time. Someone can come home late and I immediately think they got into a car wreck, and check my phone for recent car crashes and other thing etc. etc. number 2, I always have intrusive thoughts, terrible ones ever since I was a kid I can’t control. I immediately feel like thinking these will lead god to hate me, and that he made an imperfection on me. And every time I try to hide these thoughts away, like right now they’re coming out I just can’t stop thinking of them and it’s so hard to do anything. Just thoughts like, “you hate your mom” or, “you hate god” and stuff that scares me like spiders. It’s hard to do anything with these thoughts. I’m also a major perfectionist, if anything is out of order I freak out. Yes, my room is messy. But I feel a sense of incompleteness and anxiety if I don’t empty the dishwasher, or don’t clean dirty dishes around the sink. These are recent and I feel like God will punish me for committing the sin of laziness. I also have a thing with the number 5, when I touch something it needs to be 5 times and if it’s not 5 times I freak out. I’m also terrified of getting sick, every time my friend is sick I freak out and don’t get near them the entire day, constantly washing my hands. Writing this is triggering a lot of my terrible thoughts and I don’t want to continue writing. Please let me know your thoughts, mental illness runs in my family but my mom is constantly telling me there’s nothing wrong with me. Maybe she’s right.

I'm up trying not to wash the sheets at someone's house I am spending the night in, wondering about germs and if their AirPod case that I was asked to move to the nightstand is dirty enough to the point that I should wash my hands. I'm exhausted but my brain will not let me relax enough to go to sleep and I'm tired of OCD ruining things like this for me.

hello, does anyone have any advice i’m a compulsive hand washer who obsesses about germs and as a result my hands have become very sore and cracked and even bleed sometimes and it hurts to bend my hands has anyone got any things that helped to reduce this compulsion as it’s causing pain now.

Someone who was sick made food for me but I didn't eat it because they were sick but I don't want to waste the food because that would be disrespectful as they took their time to make it. I just don't want to take the risk of eating it and then getting sick. I hate getting sick. I don't know what to do about this.

I have been going over how my ocd will affect a future relationship. The things I struggle with in my OCD is cleaning and contamination. There are times where when I feel at my worst, I have to wash any cooking or eating utensil/dish/pan/pot multiple times. I think the max amount of times I have washed a single bowl alone in one wash is 17 times. That's just a bowl. I also when cleaning use gloves that they use at doctor's offices and/or hospitals. It helps me to feel like I won't need to wash or complete a compulsion(s). So my question is would I be enabling myself or no because I am constantly going over in my head what I should be doing or not being doing and it's always so exhausting.

I’ve only taken two showers in the last month because I can no longer take cleaning the hair trap and the hair and scum and pooh particles out of the tub. I’m afraid of the germs on the walls, shower curtain, floor mat, and grab bar. I can’t even use the main toilet because I’m afraid of what I’ll sit on. I heater being dirty, but I hate the thought of other peoples hair and germs touching me.

Hello everyone, I struggle with believing I washed my hands the entire time I counted for a specific time such as 20 seconds. I guess I doubt that my hands were moving the entire time. I sometimes feel I need to have my partner watch me when I count and wash and that makes me believe I washed for the entire 20 seconds. Does anyone struggle with this? I don't want to count anymore as I know this is a compulsion. This started during COVID. I don't feel I know how to wash hands normally, without thinking about it and worrying if I did it enough. Any advice on how to fight this would be very appreciated. Thank you!

Over the last two or three years I experienced many life changing events. First, I graduated college after taking 11 years to complete my degree due to having dyslexia and processing and developmental delays. Second, I finally garnered the confidence to get my driver's license in my early thirties and eventually bought my own and my first car. Third, I was lucky enough to have enough money saved up to buy my first home. It had not been long before my family noticed that I was taking longer in the shower than maybe I intended. I found myself washing my body and hair four times each and still not feeling clean. This evolved to being ultra sensitive to smells and germs regardless of if they were on my body or not. I wash my hands till they are red and raw. I have avoided going outside or even going to my house and garage. On top of that, if anyone mentions me needing to go outside, whether in my car or not, I get this stinging and tingling feeling all over my body that feels like my skin is burning or on fire. After a rough conversation with my mom, I now can get a hold of it and only feel clean if I run through a checklist of convincing myself that my hair, body, hands, and feet are all clean after a shower and before I get into bed at night. I have never done this before in my life but I feel like its gotten to the point that I have an anxiety attack and my skin feels like it is burning from the inside if I think about even just sitting outside with my dog. I have never been diagnosed or even treated for OCD, but I'm hoping through an OCD therapist, I can get the help I need.

I can't keep feeling this way

My problem sounds kinda silly in comparison to others here, but I must say it plagues my daily life so so much that I just need to share it. It would be great if I could get a few advice here. I was diagnosed with OCD a few years back, although the symptoms started quite a few more years back. It’s nothing too serious, but it takes me almost an hour to use the toilet (not bathing). What takes so much time? Cleaning myself and washing my hands mostly. I repeat a set of…what the doctor termed as ‘rituals’ I perceive as ‘necessary’ to wash my hands properly. If I do not complete them, the back of my mind screams “You’re still unclean!”. Even if I manage to avoid my compulsions for one day, on the next, it doesn’t become any easier. A brutal cycle of obsessions and compulsions that needs to be broken every day, but I can’t. I can speed up my ‘rituals’, but not avoid them entirely. This means the time I need in the toilet is still around 45 minutes to an hour. On my worst days, it has even gone for two and a half hours at a time. Although I can continue like this at home, but soon I need to move to college. I know college and dorm life won’t be any kinder to me with this disability of mine. Neither will I be given so much time inside shared washrooms, nor can I avoid the vicious bullying that may come with it. The latter is mostly my assumption, but even normal students face ragging in college; it’s a fact. I would be really glad if anyone with similar conditions who has spent life in dorms alongside peers could share their experiences. How to manage the demon of OCD and how can I survive dorm life? I’m already scared of rumours of ragging I heard from my seniors, but this disability of mine makes life so much worse. I’m really afraid of what the future holds for me.

I think I have contamination OCD based on what I’ve been able to research. It’s debilitating and I just want my life back. I have to wipe down or clean everything that comes into my house. Yet there are “clean” and “dirty” areas within the house, which logically doesn’t make sense.

Does anyone else feel completely consumed and controlled by their OCD? I have constant fear, panic, and anxiety now 24/7 around contamination OCD. I have tried ERP, but it feels like it doesn’t help with the daily issues I am having. It feels like I can barely get through the day.

me when I hear “virus or bacterial illness”😨😰😱 me when I hear “common cold” 😯

Hello! I know I have contamination OCD in some sort of way. I cannot use or touch things that are “dirty” is a big one, whether there is a stain, crumb, or if it had been somewhere I deemed dirty. I cannot put outside clothes on my bed, I cannot use certain utensils, and there is so much more. I get so much physical anxiety from these things. However, I cannot figure out what the obsession is. I cannot do certain things but I don’t know WHY. I don’t know what the fear is if I do it. I don’t think someone will die, I don’t want to get sick but I also don’t think getting sick is the obsession. Just wondering if anybody else has ideas or what their own obsessions are with it!