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Anyone else feels like their anxiety causes them low-mood? And which makes you feel depressed and numb? It is hard to get over this feeling.

I deadass feel so gross right now. So I just turned 20 and I feel stupid for doing this. I took a shower and I ran back to my room in a towel, and my 15-year-old step-nephew was asleep on the couch. I brought clothes with me to the bathroom to throw on after, but because the bathroom was so damp and I felt extremely disgusting (contamination OCD), I decided to go to my room where I feel more comfortable and less like there’s mold on me. I ran to my room and hoped that he was still asleep. I realized my towel was super short. What if I did that on purpose because I’m a pedophile? I’m so tired. Please give me any help at all. And I genuinely feel so dumb for doing that because it is lowkey weird. I’m 20 and smarter than that, but I just couldn’t stand the dampness. I genuinely feel like it was my fault and I should’ve done better and now the guilt is gonna eat me up til I no longer wanna be here. Just being real. ✌🏽

I’ve had a really hard day, and OCD has convinced me my bed isn’t safe. My bed is my comfort spot so this is the worst place it could hit me. I have fear of paranormal contamination and bad luck/curses/haunting. Today was the birthday of someone who OCD believes to be paranormally contaminated. I was in the lounge and thought I saw a white cloudy thing out the corner of my eye but couldn’t see it when I looked again. It’s likely it was smoke or a reflection in my glasses but I couldn’t figure it out. I had a shower but got back into bed wearing the same clothes I was wearing when it happened. OCD is telling me that a ghost related to the paranormally contaminated person (because of their birthday) was in my house and has clung to my clothes so is therefore in my bed and will now cause all of the things I’m afraid of to happen to me whenever I use my bed. I wish i didn’t get into my bed but I was trying to fight it - it’s so hard to fight it when you then end up in a huge spell of rumination and planning of compulsions to alleviate the stress. I know I shouldn’t give in but I’m so afraid. All I want is a new bed but it’s not like you can just go and buy a new bed every time OCD tells you. I’m so tired of being scared that bad things are going to happen to me, and this feels like the lowest blow it could’ve dealt me. I just needed to get it off my chest to someone who understands, so if you read this - thank you.

I can't keep feeling this way

My problem sounds kinda silly in comparison to others here, but I must say it plagues my daily life so so much that I just need to share it. It would be great if I could get a few advice here. I was diagnosed with OCD a few years back, although the symptoms started quite a few more years back. It’s nothing too serious, but it takes me almost an hour to use the toilet (not bathing). What takes so much time? Cleaning myself and washing my hands mostly. I repeat a set of…what the doctor termed as ‘rituals’ I perceive as ‘necessary’ to wash my hands properly. If I do not complete them, the back of my mind screams “You’re still unclean!”. Even if I manage to avoid my compulsions for one day, on the next, it doesn’t become any easier. A brutal cycle of obsessions and compulsions that needs to be broken every day, but I can’t. I can speed up my ‘rituals’, but not avoid them entirely. This means the time I need in the toilet is still around 45 minutes to an hour. On my worst days, it has even gone for two and a half hours at a time. Although I can continue like this at home, but soon I need to move to college. I know college and dorm life won’t be any kinder to me with this disability of mine. Neither will I be given so much time inside shared washrooms, nor can I avoid the vicious bullying that may come with it. The latter is mostly my assumption, but even normal students face ragging in college; it’s a fact. I would be really glad if anyone with similar conditions who has spent life in dorms alongside peers could share their experiences. How to manage the demon of OCD and how can I survive dorm life? I’m already scared of rumours of ragging I heard from my seniors, but this disability of mine makes life so much worse. I’m really afraid of what the future holds for me.

Anyone have contamination OCD about there kitten/puppy getting on them and making them dirty if you can call it that it's a unknown contaminate but starts my washing compulsion and trying to keep them from getting on me unless iam already feel dirty,Contaminated hard to explain

I think I have contamination OCD based on what I’ve been able to research. It’s debilitating and I just want my life back. I have to wipe down or clean everything that comes into my house. Yet there are “clean” and “dirty” areas within the house, which logically doesn’t make sense.

Does anyone else feel completely consumed and controlled by their OCD? I have constant fear, panic, and anxiety now 24/7 around contamination OCD. I have tried ERP, but it feels like it doesn’t help with the daily issues I am having. It feels like I can barely get through the day.

me when I hear “virus or bacterial illness”😨😰😱 me when I hear “common cold” 😯

Hello! I know I have contamination OCD in some sort of way. I cannot use or touch things that are “dirty” is a big one, whether there is a stain, crumb, or if it had been somewhere I deemed dirty. I cannot put outside clothes on my bed, I cannot use certain utensils, and there is so much more. I get so much physical anxiety from these things. However, I cannot figure out what the obsession is. I cannot do certain things but I don’t know WHY. I don’t know what the fear is if I do it. I don’t think someone will die, I don’t want to get sick but I also don’t think getting sick is the obsession. Just wondering if anybody else has ideas or what their own obsessions are with it!

I put too much on my plate. Im working full time night shift, a full time hybrid student, and doing clinical rotations all in the midst of buying a house and adding a third to my long term relationship. i thought i could handle it. i thought that if i wanted this enough that i could make it work but now i feel like my brain is on fire. Working nights has me so paranoid that i have to count my steps out 1-2-3-4 and sometimes feel completely glued to my seat counting 1-2-3-4 over and over to get the feeling of dread to go away. I am constantly ruminating and reassurance seeking to the point of breaking down every time i’m alone. My brain is full of all of the what-ifs so full that it’s hard to sleep. I had my first appointment with a specialist but due to everything going on, i fell asleep while waiting for the appointment to start (Telehealth) Before all of this started my OCD was just the counting steps and bouts of contamination fears and over cleaning but now im questioning my life over and over to point of pointlessness and its driving me insane. i cant do this. i will because i know i have to and it will be over soon but im so scared and i dont know how i can come out of all of this okay and intact with the people i love still around me. i hate who i have become.

Hi! I have a really hard time traveling. I feel like everything is dirty or can never be cleaned enough. Fabric Furniture is the worst for me! I much rather stay home and relax than travel. The problem is that my family loves to travel. They feel like I can never live a normal life because of uncomfortable I am in hotels or rental houses. I normally try and bring as much of my own stuff as I can but sometimes I still cannot relax. I end up ruminating on all the things that need to be cleaned in the room. Which leads to a fight with my family because they see it as perfectionism. We are currently on a trip and the rental house is not as brand new in the pictures. The pictures are your typical ones where they do make it look better than it is. Some of the furniture is different than the pictures and the walls are all scuffed up. Is it wrong to expect it to be pretty much what is pictured? Does anyone have any tips to try to not fixate on how dirty traveling can be? Or explaining to others how it affects you without seeming like you are complaining?

One of coworkers today touched me on my back without my permission and got real close to menow I've got icky feeling all over idk if it was harassment or not but I feel gross and weird

Does anyone else get really anxious about safety seals/tamper seals. I get really stressed when my body wash/shampoo doesn’t have a seal because I fear someone has tampered with it, such as putting bodily fluids inside. Most shampoos, conditions, soaps don’t have this because soap is simply self cleaning lol. This is also a huge anxiety with lotions. Most times lotions don’t come with a safety seal. Does anyone else have this kind of OCD? I guess it would be classified as checking and contamination.

Do you ever get hung up on the fact that at one point in time, you did not have detectable symptoms of ocd? I literally did not have contamination ocd until Covid. I used to lay on the ground with the dog, go out and come back home and lay on the couch in the same clothes, put my phone and keys on ground etc. Now I can’t even walk in my socks in house because it’s going to contaminate the couch when I put my feet up. Now I can’t sit on my couch unless I change my clothes, and now if I even have to touch my phone when my hand is “dirty,” I have to wash my hands, wipe my phone, and wash my hands again. This really sucks. I wish I can go back to a time where I wasn’t like this.

I find myself in an incredibly difficult and distressing situation, and I desperately need your help and guidance. The contamination and health concerns related to my OCD have taken an almost complete hold over my life. What's worse, my husband has been manipulating me for years, exacerbating my OCD and causing immense emotional pain. It started gradually, with him making hurtful remarks, seemingly incapable of finding happiness when I was happy. As my OCD worsened, his behavior became more extreme. He took my beloved dog to the basement, claiming it was a threat to me. However, he didn't stop there. He started using derogatory and offensive names for my dog, such as "satan dog" and "fucking dog." Every day, he expresses his hatred towards my dog, saying he hates dogs. This relentless emotional abuse has only served to worsen my OCD. In addition to the emotional torment, I have endured several traumatic experiences, including three painful miscarriages, constant fights with my husband, prolonged separation from my family for seven years, a pervasive feeling of unsafety, and the isolation imposed by the COVID-19 pandemic. Rather than supporting me through these challenges, my husband has made it his mission to make me feel worse. He frequently works long hours, leaving me alone for at least 12 hours each day, with no relatives or friends to turn to for support. To add to my distress, my husband has bombarded me with distressing news and videos, particularly those depicting plane disasters. Consequently, I have developed an intense fear of boarding planes, which hinders any possibility of being reunited with my family. This fear has also spilled over into other aspects of my life, making it impossible for me to go out or even open items from the grocery store due to obsessive thoughts about contamination. What concerns me even more is the mistreatment of my dog. My husband has locked him in a small transport box, leaving him in darkness throughout the day. He keeps the key with him and has purposely created obstacles, such as leaving trash and disgusting items, to prevent me from accessing my dog. Yesterday, he even threatened to kill my dog, a threat he has made multiple times before. I have pleaded with him to give my dog away to someone who will care for him, but he adamantly refuses. He has also made disturbing comments about getting rid of his cokatiel. The constant fear of harm to my beloved pets and to myself and my baby is consuming me. In my desperation, I suggested divorce as a way to escape this torment. I promised not to ask for anything but to leave with my baby, as my husband shows no interest in our child and often ignores us. His indifference and disconnection have become glaringly apparent. Although he claims he would never hurt us, his demonstrated intent to harm innocent lives — our pets — leaves me doubting his words. If he is capable of such cruelty, I fear he could easily harm us as well. He seems bored and annoyed by our presence. Adding to my distress, I feel trapped and unable to seek help from authorities due to his threats. He has warned me that if I reach out for help, he will manipulate the custody of our baby, blaming it all on my mental health struggles. Furthermore, my lack of citizenship complicates matters, making it even more challenging to find a way out. I have tried to confide in my family, but they refuse to listen, believing my husband to be a good person. I desperately long to return to my home country, but the distance of over 11,000 km makes it seem impossible. If my pets are harmed, I fear I will never be able to regain a sense of normalcy. My husband consistently blames me for everything, compounding my heartbreak and leaving me shattered. I implore you, the members of this forum, to offer any advice, support, or resources that could help me escape this abusive situation. Your guidance and assistance in finding a way to safety would mean the world to me. I feel utterly brokenhearted and in dire need of your help. Thank you for taking the time to read my plea. I eagerly await your responses and appreciate any assistance you can provide.

I've been getting carpet beetles (i saw 2 over the past few days) and I read online that they can lay eggs all over including in clothes and now i'm paranoid that all my clothes are contaminated and i have to rewash all of them and I just feel so gross and it feels like carpet beetles are all over me.,

What can I say to my 30 something daughter when she says she won’t go in my car because my bag touched the floor near where a ladybug died and I put my bag on the passenger seat. Now the seat is contaminated. She is living with me right now and not driving.

One of my themes is HIV fears, and I was just at Walmart picking out a shirt from the rack that they have them all folded up on. I was reaching for one from the bottom shelf and my hand brushed against the underside of the shelf above and they're was a sharp part that cut open my thumb. I panicked and took a picture of underneath and it was just the shelf was sharp where it looked welded but it made me bleed a lot and now I'm freaked out thinking it could have a disease

Hi everyone, I’m new here and this is my first post. For about a year now I have not drank any tap water (not even filtered). Somehow I became convinced a while back that my tap water was not safe to drink straight from the tap, and shortly after that I became convinced that filtered tap water was contaminated too (and that the filters themselves are somehow contaminated). Logically I know none of it makes sense, and I’m not even sure what I am afraid of happening if I do drink it. It doesn’t feel like a fear of getting sick, just an intense sense of dread at the thought of drinking the water. I also have some problems with drinking bottled water especially if I feel like I can taste the plastic. So I have almost exclusively drank canned sparkling water for a year now. Has anyone dealt with similar contamination fears?