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I am very scared . My mind is sick. Someone told me that a bad thing happened to them and I keep thinking about it. I think: what if I wanted that to happen? Is this ocd? I am so scared and disgusted. How can I think like this??

I’ve felt like I’m in danger all day long and that something bad is about to happen to me 🙃🙃I realize this is probably just a compulsion to think about it. I ruminated and obsessed basically all day. However In therapy today I played with a food that I’m terrified that I’m allergic to! So that’s a win 😊

I struggle with Harm/Suicidal OCD. This causes me great distress and worry. Not only doubt, fear, and stress! I am trying to not take medication because my husband and I are finally expecting our first baby. I want to be the best for myself & my family that I can be. What has help everyone else? The thoughts and feelings make it feel so real that I want to commit suicide when in reality I do not & they make me think so many horrific thoughts. I want to be the person I was before that didn’t have any of these thoughts. Any recommendations for help is greatly appreciated!

I’ve been going through a weird phase where I’m not feeling much anxiety, the thoughts are still there but it feels weird not feeling anxious about them, I have harm ocd and it feels too real when the thoughts come without the anxiety, after feeling anxious almost every morning.

i remember feeling more hopeless in the past, having lower moments, mentally, you know, in 2022 i completely lost it. and i remember being 14 in 2020 and for the first time really considering ending my life. but still every day i wake up and go to sleep in the ocd prison, i am so tired, no one understands the patterns are the same, have been the same for years and yet i don’t know how to cope. it’s so exhausting.

Last night my friend and I did edibles for the first time. We accidentally did too much and we both became incredibly anxious. For me it made my ocd bad I started constantly checking to see if I was aroused and I got paranoid that I was and then kept checking and it really just triggered my ocd. I was wondering if anyone else has gone through similar things? I got really bad sexual and violent intrusive thoughts.

Can anyone tell me if it’s normal for a theme to stay stuck for months. My theme is harm ocd but I’ve had this same content for months and months. I was wondering if anyone else experienced this? Also, does anyone feel like they’re always on edge like something is going to happen at any second?. I feel like my body and brain is constantly scanning for danger and throwing things at me (even random things outside of my main theme). Thank you to anyone who shares their story.

I’ve had anxiety surrounding driving for 4 years now. I don’t feel like I’ll ever move past it. I am so scared that I’ll get into an accident and hurt someone or myself, even though I know I am a safe driver. I’m not sure what to do.

Have you ever been blackout drunk or on any substance that causes you to blackout and your ocd tells you that you did something horrible or something happened to someone and you were there and you were under the influence so your ocd gets triggered and makes you think you did it even though you weren’t having intrusive thoughts at that time in your life?

How do I even talk about this to ANYONE, I feel so shameful especially because why do the most horrendous images or saying pop up in my head. Just because of incident that happened @ a young age between my cousin and I, I keep telling myself I’m a P and I can’t get close to the little kids especially the ones I know because it starts attacking them. I keep fearing gods judgment like these are sinister thoughts, i NEVER wanted. I feel like this is going to follow me through death and I’ll be punished.

Early this morning I was laying in bed with my youngest daughter. My Harm OCD was having a field day. The intrusive thoughts that I would hurt her. So vivid and alarming scared me so bad. I really had to lean into "these are ocd thoughts" I know I would NEVER hurt her. My therapist has let me know OCD takes what we value most and turns it against us. Being able to identify that it is a terrible thought and the fact that it brings horrible fear with it shows that it is OCD. I just hate this. Other subtypes are horrible too but this I think is the worst. I also have suicide OCD that flares up from time to time. I have a irrational fear of dying/getting older but I still have the thought of "What if I get so bad I just snap and think its the only way out" and then I spiral in those thoughts of guilt and not wanting to get that bad. Other days I have just the residual anxiety that sits there. The physical feeling of the adrenaline dumping into my body and not knowing why. I have been able to function and I am working on reframing and identifying triggers (Fairly new to this). Not seeking reassurance, but I am wondering if anyone else has had similar. PS. I have started having very Vivid dreams when I go to bed. I don't know if its the OCD or if its the recent med change. If anyone has input or wants to discuss some of them I am very open to it.

Can OCD give you a sense of feeling “on edge” or irritable all the time? I feel like I am walking around in life about to lose control then I start spiraling with harm ocd and mental compulsions. I then start wondering if I am bipolar or something worse. I am so hypersensitive of what I am feeling mood wise that I am just questioning everything . What I do know is I am not relaxed at all . What really is upsetting here is I start thinking to myself … do I have the right doctor? What if there is something worse and no one knows? I start questioning my entire diagnosis ! How can I handle this uncertainty in a productive way while gaining more confidence that I am going to be alright ? Got two kids and a family to worry about and this is a giant distraction.

Did anyone else used to read messed up fanfictions on wattpad and stuff? I have so much guilt it’s so unbelievable what I used to read and I don’t understand how I could have read some of the things I read. The amount of things I did wrong as a kid/teen I feel like I’m completely numb to all of my monad like I don’t even care that much anymore. I know it’s not true but I just feel so defeated. I feel like I was a p word and other messed up stuff without realizing I was. I was homeschooled and didn’t have any real life interaction with anyone and not great sex education, and I say this to myself maybe it took me longer to figure out certain things were unusual or wrong but that’s not really an excuse. Idk. I feel so burnt out and out of ideas for what to do. I want to die and I want to live at the same time. I’m scared of everything and all of the mistakes I made. It’s just an endless list of mistakes. Sorry, I just am desperate for a need to vent.

I suffer with harm ocd, towards my husband I kinda was getting over it already because I knew I didn’t wanna do it but I yesterday I fell into my depression episode again. I started crying really bad. I just felt super sad. Really confused a lot of emotions till today. I still feel like that. I don’t know if it’s because my hormones are all over the place. I got sick from the flu and I also have my period but I’m about to end it and I feel a lot of things. I just feel super sad yesterday with no like motivation. I started feeling sad again with no purpose on life . I recently saw this video like when people get happy while having depression is because they made a decision that they wanna like end their life and I’m scared. I’m gonna do that like I’m scared. I’m gonna start having suicidal thoughts or like I get happy. That like I know it’s because I wanna end my life. I feel so much for my husband I love him because he’s the one that helped me out, but I don’t know why my mind gets mad whenever I think that I love him so much like it’s like something and it gets mad and makes me think I wanna kill him for no reason and I feel like no motivation for anything so it’s like you would want to do that because there’s no reason of living anymore if you are gonna be sad your whole life.

Has anyone gone through this or is still going through this and can give any tips on how to make it stop? The intrusive thoughts during sexual activities are simply bothering me so much that I'm afraid to do anything like that because of the thoughts. I couldn't do it for weeks because I was always thinking about some atrocious thing, but yesterday I failed and now I'm feeling bad because even though I tried not to think, it's like I had an open folder in the back of my head and I blame myself for not being able to delete or block it. I'm afraid that avoiding it will become a compulsion and disrupt my sex life, but I also don't feel comfortable doing it often because of the thoughts. Does anyone identify? any tips to improve? I'm repressing myself because of this and I know it's not something that will do me any good. Sorry if this is inappropriate.

Any advice for intrusive sexually harming thoughts? I feel like a monster

Today I was driving into work and a little gray squirrel ran out in front of me. I couldn't do anything except tense up and hope that he somehow avoid getting hit. My hopes went unfulfilled and it seriously hurt me. I wanted to cry. And I still do a little. I don't want to have harm come to any little critters, but I also wish that my emotions weren't so messed up to feel so empathetic about the squirrel. I would give anything to go back in time to before all my emotions and my ocd decided to go haywire.

I am issuing a trigger warning because I will be discussing Su!cide themed OCD and don’t want to trigger anyone struggling with thoughts like this. ❤️ I have been struggling with suicidal themed ocd (not ideation, unwanted thoughts that are very distressing) as well as existential OCD. I am posting this to help anyone feel less alone / if anyone with similar themes wants to chat. My main fear is that I will become sick of the distress I am experiencing and will decide that I want to commit S. I also fear being depressed and being passively suicidal and am constantly checking whether I truly want to die or whether it’s OCD related. Then my existential OCD loves to join in saying “what if this is all pointless, this is all meaningless, life will never be enjoyable again” etc. I then fear that I will start to believe these thoughts because they feel so real & that my philosophy on life will change and I will take my own life because I cannot take it anymore. I feel like I cannot move on without knowing that there is a purpose and that I 100% will NOT k!ll myself. But I am aware of how OCD works. I know I need to leave these questions alone because my true values still exist deep down, but it feels irresponsible to do so. I DO NOT want reassurance, but I am sharing this so people feel less alone because these themes (especially su!cidal) are extremely taboo. Love to anyone reading this- we are gonna make it!! ❤️

I am having such a hard time right now. So I’m a person who suspects they have OCD. I’ve been struggling with intrusive thoughts about harming myself or my family, Also those of being a pedophile for years now. But the one that is currently in my mind is that I’m Asexual. I’ve always felt I was gay. I wanted to kiss boys I’d be aroused by the sight of them, and just wanted to be close to them. I always suspected why I never had a boyfriend was because of my apprehension and the small dating pool, and being in high school almost non existent one. So I vowed to just save it for the right person. But earlier in the week I got the thought that I subconsciously never wanted that, and that I was just lying about being gay and actually never felt attraction. Now I’m racking my brain of all the times I’ve ever liked someone, trying to find out if it was real. And it’s terrifying me. I know there’s nothing wrong with it but it just doesn’t feel right for me.

why do I keep feeling like this Just wanna cry Just wanna cut I don’t know how to deal with this