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Cause i feel like mine does.

ppl who teach kids on here: any advice or tips? i feel like i’ve gained a certain amount of trust or acceptance for being there but there’s also this nagging sense of worry that i’m not taken seriously. or worse, they think i’m perverted. i try not to bring nervous energy around them but i’m a dance teacher so i notice a lot without trying. sometimes i can feel fine and comfortable, and other times i’m scared out of my mind to even go there. what can be done to relieve the anxiety other than “accepting uncertainty?” i want them to be safe and feel safe.

It literally feels so wrong. as if im doing something i’ve never done before. letting go feels so scary, it’s like my core fear is acceptance in itself. does anybody know what acceptance looks like? i’ve always been an anxious person so it feels like acceptance is just doing something so out of the blue, i feel physically incapable of it, like sometimes i start shivering. is there any hope for me?

i am really struggling right now and don’t know what to do. need some support/advice

Does anyone else think there is actually some truth to this? I totally get why people hate that phrase however I do know people in my life who seem a bit “ocd” but not enough for a diagnosis. My bf for example is terrified of smelling bad. He will make me smell the same jumper three times to make sure it doesn’t smell (I do try to discourage this behaviour don’t worry) and he has many many more checks he does and also was beyond terrified of infecting his loved ones with covid and barely went out. My sister has this bed bugs thing and fears of STIs that’s kept her up at night at times. My mum had this weird thing with composition in paintings having to be absolutely perfect and charting every single point - to an extent that this is all she did obsessively for about two years. Is it just anxiety? I know it could be ocd but apart from these things I’ve never noticed anything.

Hello, I come from a country in Europe that used to be together with other countries including Serbia. Long time ago. We do not border Serbia, but there is still sort of a collective emotional connection with those countries. News from Serbia from 3.May23 has shocked me. A 13 year old boy killed a security guard and 8 children, 7 girls and a boy. He wounded 7 more. He took his father's guns. His father, a famous doctor, radiologist, in Belgrade, taught him how to use guns. The boy's only regret is not to have killed many more. He had a list with names of the kids he wanted to kill. He claims to have enjoyed watching the kids terrified and screaming. He was/is an excellent student and was always well-behaved. He was successful at school, at basketball, at drama/theater club, has won many awards I science, languages,.... competitions. His mom is a scientist. He had planned the killing for a month. He won't go to prison, he won't be punished since he is not yet 14 years old. He is being kept in a psychiatric hospital for adolescents. But they will probably let him go. His father is in prison, but the maximum sentence he can get is 2 months. For not preventing the access to his guns to the son. So far, he claims that he had followed all the laws and regulations about storing the guns, so he will be out in a few days, I guess. What shocked me even more is that he has tones of kids posting videos of support, awe and praise to him and laughing at the victims, insulting the dead, but admiring him on Tik-tok,... Other incidents have followed: a 21 year old shot a similar number of people a day after, a girl wanted to stab her teacher with a knife, kids film themselves threatening people with guns,..Just today, police have arrested 2 kids for posting the videos of support to the boy who killed. I am anxious. I feel scared. What's going on with kids? I am not scared for my safety or safety of the people in my country. I feel so anxious because I can't stop thinking about how something like that could have possibly happened. How can a 13 year old boy do something like that? He does not get it, but he did not kill 9 people, he killed 4 more. He ruined his own life, his mom and dad's and his 10 year-old sister's. Not to mention the lives of the victims' parents' and family and friends'. I keep thinking about what went wrong. He had it all. But did he? It is claimed that he was bullied by other kids for stuttering. He claims he was ignored by his peers, but there are girls who had a crush on him. He even had a girlfriend for 2 months. He describes himself as a psychopath. Kids develop empathy at the age of 3 usually. Is it possible, that he developed physically and in all cognitive educational ways since he is super intelligent as far a school is concerned, but emotionally stayed at the level of a 2 - 3 year old kid? He feels nothing. No regret. He hasn't even asked about his mom or dad yet and it's been a week since the shootings. All he asks is when he will be free to go home. Can a person be born with predisposition to become a psychopath and it depends on the environment, upbringing, family ties, if he or she one day explodes and does sth as terrible as that? There's been talk of a split personality. Like in the film 3 faces of Eve. There might be something on it, since just before entering school, he got all panicky and scared and intended to call his mom to tell her what was going on with him, how he was feeling, but all of a sudden he changed his mind, didn't call her, there was no fear in him anymore. All he wanted was to kill. A second before he was like a person with ocd - he got scared of the things his brain was telling him to do and panicked. He was on the brink of calling his mom for help. This is how we react. We get scared because we know the thoughts are not OK, not acceptable, not in balance with who we are and our morals. We try to escape them or prevent it from happening by performing compulsions. He understood for a short while, he didn't want to do it and wanted to prevent it by calling his mum. But then the resemblance ends. We don't give in. We don't do anything to hurt others. But he, in a split second turned all his emotions off, became a completely different person, collected, calm, cold, on a mission to kill as many as possible. No mom, no fear, nothing but killing was o his mind. He even called the police himself. He was completely calm and collected when they arrested him. No fear, emotions, regrets. A psychopath probably wouldn't feel like he did moments before entering school. He realized what he was about to do and it upset him, put him in a state of panic. Yet, the next minute the fear and panic were gone. He went on his mission. Like 2 completely different people living in 1 body. It is so heartbreaking to blame him alone for what he did. He is a child. How can we accept that a child can turn into such a monster? Am I a bad person for feeling sorry and sad not only for the victims, but for him and his family as well? People I know don't do that. They choose sides and attack the other side. It is gruesome. Everybody is putting blame on someone else. The politicians on one another, people on parents and teachers. Psychologists on teachers and parents for not noticing anything wrong with him. Only the kids are devided in 2 groups. Those who are shocked, sad, confused. And those who praise the killer as a king, as their hero, a role model. Oh, heaven! The last group causes the anxiety in me. What has gone wrong in our society, that a 10 year old threatens that he will also kill his schoolmates and teachers, just to continue his role model's work? Or that teenage girl, who trided to stab her teacher and a girl in her class. And the one who threatened to kill members of his church? Is it just me, but do you think it would be sensible to set age limit for all social media. Minimum age at 18 or at least 16. Why can't a 6 or a 10 year old child live without Tik Tok, Facebook, Instagram,...? Why are there no filters about violence, sex, threatening, bullying on social media, including YouTube? The boy was super active on Tik Tok, Instagram,.... He played violent games, was a fan of aggressive movies and videos,.... Maybe if more kids spent a quality time with each other in person, playing real games and sports (with a ball, or monopoly,...) they would grow emotionally as well. And if they were prevented from seeing and enjoying any kind of violence from anyone online including their peers, they would find idols and role models in other people - in family or a singer, an artist, a scientist... The only dilema with setting an age limit to social media is for me about communities like ours here at NOCD. These are life saving communities for grown-ups as well as children. And it is very good so. Here are also rules. Noone wants to insult others or blame them,... But FB, Instagram, TikTok.... phones at the age of 5 and on... Come on? Really necessary? I am sorry and I apologize because I know this will upset everyone. I just need your input on something like this, so that I can start breathing again. I can't expect the sadness and confusion will go away just yet, but I need to deal with this pressing feeling of anxiety in my chest caused by constantly thinking about it. My ocd is very happy. Anxiety is a stepping stone for the onset of ocd. So it's just a matter of time Ocd will start talking unless I stop the anxiety. I am so sorry for upsetting you as well. I hope I will wake up and realize it was all just a bad dream. It is not important where it happened. I would feel the same if it happened in London or LA or a small village in India,... what breaks my heart is that the actors and victims in this tragedy are children. Love and hugs. Please love each other, listen to and hear each other, don't ever disregard someone's pain. Not a grown-up's, and especially not a child's. Have a better day than I am having. I just feel like crying. There is this beautiful video of the only boy killed, playing the piano. He plays so beautifully. It just breaks your heart. The killers best friend, allegedly. Uhhh. I think I will stop following what's going on there, since it's becoming to stressful for me. Love you all guys. Bless you all.

I've had an OCD flare that limited my life significantly. I had I don't deserve to think or to feel happy emotions and this literally made me feel trapped like there was no way I could come through this. I couldn't even think! Anyway 5 weeks later, I'm exhausted and the I don't deserve thoughts are still hammering me every 5 seconds about everything!. I just need to know I guess that there's a way out of this and I can get my life back. I'm sitting on the couch everyday not doing much because that's all my OCD will allow me to do. I'm also scared I guess of this OCD flare, I've never felt that trapped by my own brain before and I'm having a hard time moving on knowing this side of my OCD exists. I start therapy tomorrow, but one thing I would like to know, is there a way through this?

Does anyone else have contamination ocd if so how do you deal with it please. I've managed to narrow down a few routines I do daily but mentally I'm not feeling better for it at all right now I'm really struggling it's almost like my ocd oozes out with other situations ensted and it's really taking over my life right now i hope it gets better but right now I can't see how

Just a note to anyone struggling, there is hope and you are strong enough to get through this. You are strong enough to get better, you are important and you are loved. I know it’s hard when the thoughts are stuck on repeat, when you cant sleep, when your anxiety is high and yet your depression is too. I know how hard it is to keep pushing when you just want a freaking break. OCD is an asshole that tries to take over our lives, but we are so much stronger than it. Habits can be changed, lives can be made be better. I’ve seen it and felt it when I won and kicked OCD to the curb. I’m in the midst of it right now, but one thing I know for sure is that I wont quit. We matter and are so much more than our thoughts. Together we stand.

I have suicide as a theme and along with that comes my fear of having depression. Sometimes I’ll be really struggling with anxiety or big emotions and I just want to go lay in bed, but I do not.: because in my mind that is what depressed people do and I don’t want to be depressed. Does this mean i should lay in my bed more? I’m really really struggling today. I can’t stop crying. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Other than I haven’t gotten any sleep and my ocd tells me I’ll be like This forever and I’ll never get better.

I just got a flag on one of my posts saying ‘if you are in danger of harming yourself or others call 911’ and now I’m feeling 10 times worse, thanks a lot, I don’t know if it’s because someone flagged my post for whatever reason but it’s made me feel like There actually must be something wrong with the me now since why is it saying ‘I’m danger of harming others’ ??? I feel really upset now

I want to find mental peace

What happens if I say or do the 'wrong thing'? Being canceled by culture refers to the somewhat more recent idea that if someone has said or done something offensive or perceived as insensitive or harmful in the past or present that it will be used against them and they will no longer be seen in a positive light. In other words, the idea that their worth and value could be diminished in an instant. The idea is that saying or doing one thing out of step might negate any good you have ever said or done.

This might be an odd one but I have sleep OCD. I went through a period of time where I was barely sleeping from bad panic attacks and now I am so self aware of my sleep. I have to be asleep at a certain time otherwise i will never fall asleep. I count how many hours I get. I take melatonin and hydroxyzine just to make my brain tired. If I can’t get to sleep then I drink alcohol. I’m tired of this cycle, someone pleas help me overcome this. I think about this all day everyday and cry multiple times a day. No one in my family knows but I think my boyfriend is catching on

Does ocd make any of you lie (either to hide ocd or to make your empty life look better), steal ( something small, worth under 10$, because you want or need it but can't afford it at the moment). I've read about these 2 in a book called in translation to English- ocd for dummies. The other two, binge eating and shopping relate to me. I sometimes think I am manic. I don't have money to throw away, but I still buy things I hadn't planned to. Nothing expensive. Just in the food, supplements or basic hygiene and cosmetics department. But a couple of dollars here, a few there and all of a sudden your bill adds up to 50$. Which I can't afford to spend irrationally. Just wanted to see if I am the only one.

Anyone else struggle with decision making? Not even for huge decisions, most of the time it’s stuff I feel like most people wouldn’t ruminate over so much. Especially with decisions that feel more permanent or decisions I feel will effect me for a long time. Context is I’m snap chatting a friend of my ex and I’ve realized it’s better for me to not snapchat him so that I have no ties to my ex like I’m scared my ex will come up in conversation and I don’t want to hear about him. But I’m trying to decide how to stop snapping him without being mean, so I’m trying to respond less and then soon I’ll just leave it on delivered. But then I fear what if he asked me a question/started a conversation and then I never read or read it months later? Leaving things “unfinished” triggers my anxiety, it’s hard to explain. And the irony is I left him on open months ago and didn’t think twice about it. I don’t know why this is making me anxious, it makes no sense. Also I feel like decision making ocd should be a subtype on here anyone else agree?

I was diagnosed with OCD close to a year ago, but have struggled with symptoms my whole life. I have always been a people pleaser, conflict-avoidant, and very much reliant on others for validation. I have struggled with depression and suicidal ideation since I was 16 years old, but at the time I didn’t know anything about OCD. My anxiety has taken on multiple themes, like sexuality, past mistakes, harm, and other unwanted, repetitive thoughts. I’ve experienced multiple episodes of intense anxiety where my body shuts down, doesn’t want to eat, drink water, sleep, or even take care of the most basic hygiene routines. My most recent episode nearly sent me over the edge, and before I knew it I was sobbing on the floor in my living room, holding a knife, wanting to slit my wrists. I found Ibuprofen and wanted to find out how much I needed to make my heart stop. While staying with my sister, I wanted to throw myself over the balcony, hoping the fall would kill me. Not knowing what else to do, I called my sister in tears and told her that I wanted to die. The next day, I was mentally evaluated by mental health professionals. Before my suicidal actions, I met with an ERP and OCD specialist and made plans to begin treatment. I am very fortunate to be in a situation where money is no object, and the cost would be covered. However, after being evaluated, I was told that exposure therapy was not recommended for someone in such a vulnerable place. I was then admitted to a partial-hospitalization program, and began increasing medication with the help of a psychiatrist. I am now on 80 mg of Prozac, 10 mg of Buspar, and 75 mg of Seroquel daily, along with medication to treat my thyroid disorder. Last night, I had a relapse in symptoms, and woke up drenched in sweat, heart pounding, and extremely distressed. Now, I feel depressed and hopeless. I feel like a monster. I feel like a burden to my family. I feel like I really am what I fear most, but the truth is, I don’t want to be bad. I don’t want to hurt people. I just want to be with my family and continue to love them and fear their love. I just want to be happy again. I don’t know what is going to happen from here, but I just needed to write everything down honestly. I wish there was a medication that would literally numb my brain or put me into a vegetative state so that I don’t have to feel anything anymore. I’m exhausted. I wish there was a way to stop existing that wouldn’t break my family’s heart.

The thoughts, images and emotions don’t mean anything. Just IGNORE.

Ironically, fighting them keeps you stuck. Giving up the fight is what gets you better. Share a comment if know what we mean when by OCD quicksand.

We all do things we aren’t proud of, all make big mistakes that help us learn for the future. But can we be forgiven? What mistake is too big? I’m sick of sitting with things I’ve done wrong, sick of feeling like I have to tell everyone about the things I’ve done. But it’s this need to ask people and get reassurance! I made the biggest mistake of my life in December, kne that made me rethink my life and what I was doing. I was in the deepest out of depression and getting drunk was the only thing that made me feel happy, but it came with the consequences of not giving a shit about anyone or anything. But this mistake I feel like I’m past it but I still haven’t been able to forgive myself. I’m not with a guy who makes me so unbelievably happy, but I still think about it. I saw a TikTok of a girl talking about the thing I did, and everyone in the comments was saying how much of a slut that girl must be to do that. I’m not a slut, I didn’t mean to do it, I was drunk and it was the biggest mistake of my life. I owned up to it, I took responsibility and I apologised for my actions. But it’s still hating me like I can’t move past it. Hurts so bad. Just wanna be haply with this guy who I’m falling for madly