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Hi, is it possible to actually stop intrusive thoughts or do I need to shift my tactic to accept I can’t get rid of intrusive thoughts but concentrate on how I react to intrusive thoughts. If so that’s a game changer in my life

I feel like I don’t wanna be w my bf anymore😭 I know I love him and I know I’ve loved him so much in the past, but now it feels like I’d rather have a girl in his place. I felt so much like I wanted to tell him or break up when I was with him (which felt like ocd) but the thoughts I was having about women instead of him felt calm like I wanted it as if they were intuition :(

When I was 15/16, I would talk to random strangers online in chatrooms. I was really lonely, moved to a strange city, and the pandemic had started during this time too. I thought it was funny to just mess around with people. But then it got weird. I would talk to people, tell them my name. I trusted some of them. It’s so embarrassing. I look back and realize a lot of those people were genuinely weirdos and idk why I was so gullible but. It all plays into my OCD. I keep thinking what if I talked to those people because I’m like them/will become like them. Why was I so stupid? What if I really wasn’t gullible and I knew better even though I know that I genuinely was sheltered and dumb asf because I was 15/16 and knew nothing about life?

At my workplace, I have these so called “friends” or used to be “friends” that I have tried so hard to be friends with and be there for an all I’ve ever gotten in return is hurt, put down, ignored, left out, and talked down to. There’s a girl I work with and used to be friends with that acts like she’s better than everyone else and gets my other so called friends to believe her lies and she purposely tries to leave me out and makes me an outsider when I used to be there for her but she’s always been mean in return but she makes me out to be the bad guy or the problem. She has even said I’m a problem and that everyone agrees with her. I have quit from this place before but I came back because it was convenient since I’m in college and they work with my schedule. Management won’t do anything about it because of favoritism. I tried to warn my best friend about her and other people but she wouldn’t believe me and before I quit she turned against me just like everyone else. Then when I came back she acts like my best friend again because the girl that treated me like crap gave her the same treatment when I was gone and now the mean girl is I guess trying to get her not to be my friend anymore. I don’t know what to do. These people make me want to give up because I feel like my existence is the problem. That maybe if I left they wouldn’t have to worry about me anymore since they shun me and treat me like I’m the worst person ever. It’s so mentally exhausting and it’s painful because I’m a very overly caring person and I used to be a people pleaser but now that I have kind of gotten more boundaries and protected myself, it got worse. Am I the problem? What is wrong with me? I honestly don’t even know what I ever did to these people. I have an attitude sometimes but it’s because of the way they have treated me and that’s honestly all they have ever said was my issue and I have apologized countless times for the things I’ve done wrong because I have held my self accountable but they haven’t. A couple years ago I liked a guy that started working there but then she started flirting with him when she knew I liked him and now they are dating so that tells you how that went. He was like my best friend and when I tried to warn him about her, he turned against me too. I don’t know what to do anymore. Any time I would speak out against her she would say I’m a problem and that I’m acting like a victim but all I’ve done was try to protect myself from how she’s treated me. I can’t make friends anymore because I’m afraid they are just going to do me like she did. I don’t know if I’m the problem but they make me feel so angry and I can’t do it anymore. I don’t know if this even makes any sense but if anyone relates or can help I appreciate it 💔

I’ve been suffering from non stop 24/7 dpdr for a year and a half now. I never really had OCD in a big way before I suffered some major panic attacks. Since then I’ve been a completely different person. I used to live a carefree life of traveling. Socializing. Experiencing life. After my panic attacks I became agoraphobic, couldn’t leave the house or work. My thoughts were like a washing machine over and over. I’ve done a lot of work to help overcome the fear of panic, but I’m still stuck in a 24/7 DPDR state- my thoughts never stop, I’m always searching for answers about my mental health, I have music stuck in my head from the time I wake up to the time I got to sleep, my mind is racing, attacking what I value, saying hopeless thoughts, anxiously worried about everything, I don’t do physical compulsions but I’m mentally checking myself all the time to see if I’m in DPDR still, or if things feel “weird” - I have a huge fear of going crazy and death. Although I’m not having panic attacks anymore, I’m still mentally anxious all the time. I feel like I cannot escape my thoughts, they torture me. I can’t feel any emotions, I’ve lost my sense of self, I can’t make new memories or be present - I’m constantly in my head. A lot of what kicked this off was years of trauma that was stored in my nervous system, once unleashed, I haven’t been able to recover. I want my life back. I’m tired of living in fear and exhaustion to the point where nothing brings me joy. Anxiety and ocd have taken my freedom from me, I feel like the thoughts rule every decision I make instead of being able to live freely, sometimes I don’t think it’s anxiety because I can’t feel anything physically, but these thoughts torture me- no one should have to live this way. What do I do? I’m taking medication but all it’s done is stop the physical symptoms, the thinking has not gotten better

Hi! I’m new here. I have OCD but nothing to the extent that my young daughter does. I’m struggling so bad to watch her go through this and see the distress and panic in her face when she can’t seem to stop the compulsions or quiet her head. I feel like so many different types of OCD might be easier to battle with ERP. She has many different types but the one that’s hitting her the hardest and I’m struggling to find ways to help her with is the fact that her brain is telling her that if she doesn’t do this and do that and touch this this many times etc etc etc then someone (usually me) is going to die. She won’t say this out loud either because she’s afraid of speaking it into existence. How do you do an exposure for something like that? It has to be so hard when you think someone you love might die because you don’t touch something a certain way. I’d love to find someone on here who has ever experienced the same thing. Does this type of OCD have a name?

Has anyone here switched from Sertraline to Fluvoxamine equivalent dosage? I got diagnosed with pure o in 2019, sertraline is the only medication besides buspirone and hydroxyzine combined with it that put my ocd in remission and the only medications i have ever tried. Over the years i have gained weight which would cause a small relapse in symptoms and cause my dosage to increase. I have maxed out my dosage of sertraline as of now and since September of 2023 experienced a pretty large relapse (coping a lot better this round due to being in therapy but still experiencing anxiety/ocd daily when before my condition was 99% in remission. seemed to correct its self each time i went up on the medication. i feel like my brain is noisier than usual most days (anxiety related chatter) I am terrified to switch medications, although i know there’s a chance that the fluvoxamine could help me get back to a remissive state eventually. I feel good on sertraline, i feel positive and happy, it doesn’t dull my personality and i have been lucky to not have any side effects at any dosage. I know that taking the leap and trying the new medication is probably best, but i am terrified or side effects and not being able to sleep. Or it exacerbating my ocd. My ocd had me to the point of dysfunctional within weeks of being diagnosed. The intrusive thoughts were so strong that i couldn’t even fill out my own paper work at the doctor’s office because i was so overwhelmed, i would pause long in sentences because intrusive thoughts would interrupt me. OCD caused the ripple effect for me and gave me lack of sleep, depersonalization, derealization and disassociation and intense anxiety because i was so terrified of my own thoughts and was truly scared of everything. I have came such a long way in recovery and have been able to manage this past exacerbation. But do feel like i could be better. I guess i would love some encouragement or to hear a similar story? I know all in all this is just fear getting in the way. I have also considered to accept where i am right now, because i am not dysfunctional, and am able to go to work and attend school, i am just finding that i am getting caught up in the thoughts and experiencing the anxiety more than usual.

So I've always felt so different like there's something terribly wrong with me. I've spent many years trying to figure out whats wrong. I've done research and I even went into a job centered around it all. My dad had OCD growing up but since my compulsions aren't...obvious? I never thought about OCD until recently. I've been diagnosed BPD and now most recently ADHD. I have always been diagnosed anxiety and depression since I was young. But im really starting to think its been OCD all along. I'm not sure my point in this post I just wanted to get this off my chest.

What OCD medication(s) do you take & what are your thoughts on it? I’ve taken Zoloft and Fluvoxamine in the past and think it’s time to get back on something. My only concern is that I am a female in her mid 20s and I would like to have children of my own within the next 10 years & I’m not sure how medications would affect that.

I get so confused with all this. OCD is the doubting disorder right. So a thought comes in. “Are you gay?” You’ve been seemingly straight your whole life and seemingly enjoyed it. It never came up before nor did it have to. You’re meant to be able to shrug it off as a random thought but your mind then goes… “are you sure?” Because it asked the question again, you start to feel a little uneasy. Anxious. Why would I be asking myself that? Then it goes “are you attracted to women?” Because you’re anxious, you aren’t really attracted to anything at the moment so your brain goes “see…are you sure you’re not gay?” Obviously more anxiety comes flooding in and doubt has consumed you to the point you don’t now what is up vs down. Is this normal for those with ocd? And - the fact that the brain throws at you thoughts/statements like “you know deep down you want it/like it”. Do these happen purely because of the anxiety your mind is under? In that, we just automatically assume the worse or our fear is or must be true?

Have to go to court tomorrow and face my harasser. I am terrified and it’s making my OCD go out of whack and is scaring me.

Not really sure if this is the right place for me. I've always had a hard time dealing with my urges to do things at certain times or having things just right. There were definitely signs in my childhood that have carried on to my adult life. Some people say it's OCD some say it's not. I like to have things done by certain times of the day and if they aren't I get severe anxiety and can be a little crabby until it gets done. I do try to get out of my "routine" but I'm not always successful. I feel like a prisoner to myself sometimes. If that makes any sense. This app doesn't accept my insurance so I won't be able to do the video calls but it would be awesome to find someone to talk to. And if anyone could tell me if that sounds like OCD to you. I have to have a shower before I eat dinner. I eat dinner at a set time everyday. I will not allow dishes to sit in the sink, as soon as they hit the sink I have to wash them. Everything has to he put back in it's place by the end of the night or I will not sleep. I hate sleeping because it takes me forever to fall asleep with my anxiety but I go to bed at the same time every night and my urges won't allow me to go any earlier unless I literally fall asleep sitting up.

It’s been a while since my last post and I’m doing good, but my ocd therapist on here and I believe that we try combining therapy and medicine since I’m still making good progress, the anxiety is still strong. I talked to a psychiatrist and explained what’s been going on. I’m willing to try some new medicine to see if it helps. Has anyone tried Escitalopram? I just want to know not for reassurance but just to hear some stories. If you don’t want to post, it’s okay, I’m just curious and I promise I’ll try not to look for reassurance

Fear and shame has been the foundation of my spiritual life. Having come to accept this I no longer see a point in even having one. I believe that there is a God, that he exists and has standards. I also believe that acknowledgement by Him has to be more than just believing one's own rhetoric. I don't love God, I don't know how, so what's the point of trying? But that said, I wouldn't be able to escape the knowledge that I made a choice to step away. So then what's the point of living? I'm a slave either way.

It’s near the tenth anniversary of when I saw my dad die, I can’t get the intrusive thoughts out of my head of him dying. Before today I was awake for 48 hours straight. God I just feel so exhausted.

it’s so funny how i can go from thinking i’m a lesbian in denial, to me being a murderer and wanting to kill my family, to me secretly wanting to be a boy, to me being a cannibal, then to me thinking i’m going to be possessed in a matter of minutes. whenever i’m not focused on a certain theme, i see how illogical it was and how there’s no truth to it whatsoever. but when i’m actually going through it, it seems like it’s the truth and i spiral. just love life 😍😍

I want to beat this because my OCD is so bad right now, that it causes alot of impending doom & my emetophobia feeds off my OCD as well. Those mixed with my POTS and other digestive issues, I often feel like I'm going insane. I'm having a very hard time eating & can barely leave my house. I just want to get to the point where I'm not constantly scared something bads going to happen & be able to go out and enjoy doing things with my hubby & my family. I just want to overcome it!

I don’t want to do evil things to people i love why do i even have these thoughts and images of me doing these things why is my brain this way… my heart feels broken because i love the people i have these thoughts about its not even me its like a Demond in my brain it doesn’t shut the f*** up. I just want to have peaceful loving thoughts… this is distressing. Anyone else going through this?

Long story short, I have been dealing with OCD for the past two years due to trauma I developed from texting a guy I was not supposed to during my relationship with my partner of 2 years. Ever since, I have developed obsessions and fear towards men in general. 2 months ago today, I experienced something that has been one of the worst obsessions I have encountered. I went to the gym to cancel my membership. At the counter, I encountered a guy whom seemed very friendly and outgoing. By the start, I felt weirded out because I’m like okay this guy is friendly. I was being nice and chill without being so hard on myself. In the midst of me smiling to something the guy was saying, I get a thought of ‘ be friendly behind your boyfriends back’. I was terrified and that whole situation just felt wrong. Willingly, I told my partner and he tells me to move on and it’s okay. As an OCD person, I have tendencies of telling my boyfriend worst case scenario or being extra about stuff ( making things worse than what they are). Long story short, I have gotten over that situation. Now what I haven’t gotten over was from what I said. The day that this happened, I was telling my partner about this situation and looking back at our messages, I seen that I said the thought was about ‘ to flirt behind my boyfriends back’. Obviously that is unacceptable, especially if I said what if I smiled alittle more because of that. I remember a couple of weeks ago, I would scroll right pass this message and think to myself confidently ( I was overstretching that thought, it was about being friendly). Not until 2 weeks ago, I seen this doctor on a YouTube video who said you tend to remember a memory almost perfectly the very first time you recall it. So I’m like, I said that about the thought being flirtatious the day of and so am I going crazy. So yeah, ever since I seen that stupid video I have been overly examining trying to remember how the thought felt. Although I said that, I have some memory of overstretching and I also know that I recall the thought about being friendly not to flirt. Any help with learning how to trust yourself with memories? Do you guys think that it’s just silly ocd always putting doubt on everything? Please help!!!

I have harm and suicidal ocd, sometimes i can notice its ocd cause its just worrying and theres no association with emotions im just worrying that i might do something, those times its clear to me that its just ocd, i dont even fear about it then. But there are times when i can associate with emotions, i go through something bad and i think "this is do bad, i want to die" or it can get agressive to with urges. With harm i experienced urges to harm people, that was a year ago now im just experiencing this suicidal intrusive thoughts. As i read here about suicidal ocd, i cant actually relate to people cause many just talks about it as a fear, a what if thoughts, having no association. Im dealing with really hard things right now that beats me up emotionally and then i have these suicidal thoughts with urges but i dont do anything cause i dont want to, im a christian and i know thats a sin but the crazy part is i have sometimes thoughts like "God will forgive me, Jesus died for our sin so it will be forgiven" and its crazy, i feel crazy, and im afraid that i will believe these distortions. So right now its really hard cause as i said i have a real life problem and i get these suicidal thoughts and it feels like its real. I always think that i have these cause i want to avoid pain and it seems like that cause i get it when im in so much pain. Another thing i cannot relate is people here say they are 100% sure they doesnt want to do it, for me, i doubt it. Ocd makes you doubt but then why everyone is sure they dont want to do it? Now i dont want to do it but in that time idk it feels like i want to and like im stopping myself to do something bad. Im tired of suicidal ocd, i have it for years now and it stops me to deal with problems cause when i feel overwhelmed it comes up and i feel like i want to do it...and im panicking and feel shame and guilt then depressed about it and then i dont deal with the problem i should, i deal with "maybe im suicidal". Im getting tired of it, i feel like its still here and i didnt recovered from it cause its not ocd, maybe its real problem. I tried every ocd method to heal this fear but it never went away and always comes up when im in pain... i start to think its real...