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i’m looking to get on medication so i was just wondering

(Trigger warning bc my parents are bullies lol) After six months of applying to and visiting various places, I FINALLY heard back from a grocery store. Set up an interview for tomorrow. I was overjoyed, felt my life was finally looking up, and I went to tell my family. Everyone was happy for me, that is, until my dad found out. Cue two hours of yelling, insults, and tears. My dad told me if I work at a grocery store, then that means he and my mom failed as parents. I was told I was better than this, that I should not be aiming for places where former criminals go. That I would be bullied and harassed by employees because I’m “smart” and “better than them” (the audacity of my dad to suggest I was better than anyone w a lower education was nasty af). He told me they wasted hundreds of thousands of dollars on me in college expenses just so I could work in a grocery store (MY FIRST job ever by the way, because I wasn’t allowed to work until I graduated college). He told me working part time for “experience” makes no sense and that no successful place will want to hire me after seeing I worked at a grocery store after college. My dad told me I should be at some successful firm as an economist, even though that’s NOT what I want! He asked why I even studied economics to begin with, when what happened (although he will claim to not remember) is he MADE me major in it, telling me I can pursue my true passion (graphic art and theatre) after I get a good degree. I was LIED TO. Everything I did was to impress him! Studied tirelessly in school, got all A’s, went to the college HE asked for, went for the degree HE asked for, all to get metaphorically slapped in the face because I chose an easy first job. Now I have zero motivation for this interview tomorrow. Sounds like my dad is not allowing me to work there. He told me that if I do, then I am not allowed to quit for six months no matter how much I get bullied or harassed, and that he won’t save me. He’s also going to put me into driving school so I will have no time to work (which makes sense, but it’s a long story why I don’t have my license…). And he’s also going to make me apply for jobs HE wants me to be in. Guys, I’m going to fail this interview…I was so happy. I thought I was doing good. Now I feel like an utter failure.

I get anxiety when i have to take my child to the park and be around other kids. I worry the kid was in front of me playing with my child and i worry was i leaning or moving toward them so i stepped away if i recall and avoid kids. I like literallt awkwardly walk swsy to avoid any close contact but Im worried did i do anything inappropriate or did i walk away. I dont think i did anything wrong

Has anyone ever had an intrusive thought or false memory about a person and then some time later in the future that person says something like what your thought/false memory was about happened to them and you immediately think it was you even though you know it was just ocd and now you doubt and question yourself?

i remember when i was 13 i was on instagram and i used it to lol for porn videos and this one video came up and seemed normal to me and im worried that it was unethical or bad because they people weren't smiling like they just had straight faces and know i don’t remember what their face looked like because ive thought about it so much and what if they had a sad face and i can’t remember but i think i might be overthinking that aspect of it but they both seemed willing because of their body language and i don't want to be stereotypical but they were indian and people always say how sometimes indian men can treat indian women badly sometimes and i thought it would be okay to pleasure myself to witch i did but i stopped because i had this immense guilt after and felt suicidal because i was so scared that what if it wasn't ethical and im terrified ive done something wrong, im feeling awful right now and i dont know what to do.i always remember trying to be very careful of what i was watching but i am 16 and cant let go of this and its torture

Does anyone else feel like they just don’t want to do anything even when they aren’t obsessing? I feel like I’m pulling teeth to move.

I’ve been wanting to further my own self help when it comes to OCD since I don’t have access to therapy just yet. Please give me your best recommendations !!❤️‍🩹

Ok so this Friday I wanted to go to training and usually I’m always in a cabin alone bc the rest always splits up into different ones but I wanna stay alone. But then while I was standing there charging and using my phone, a little girl walked in. And now is the thing: based on all what k remember and that I know and am 100% sure happened that way, I instantly started to feel bad and decided to leave the cabin. I plugged out my phone, packed my stuff into my bag, put my jacket out first and then came back another time to get the rest of my stuff. But the thing is that the second I left the cabin, I started doubting „what if I had assaulted her?“ and like I still remember going to the toilet a couple of seconds after that and while being on the toilet I thought „yes no nothing had happened“ and I mean my memories were still extremely accurate there but the doubt wouldn’t leave me. Like I just kept thinking „but what if I did?“ and no matter how often I go back in my memories proving to myself that I literally hadn’t remembered this at any point and barely even saw that girl bc I just instantly ran out of the cabin and that that’s obviously not even the point of running away. I also remember I was on my phone right afterwards. So basically I was on my phone before she had walked in and right after. Makes not even a minute of not using my phone. And she only changed her shoes from what I know. I didn’t even look at her. But I keep and keep on doubting that. Even though I remember everything else really well. I even remember I had chuckled at something on my phone right before she had walked in and then stopped when I saw her and ran out of the cabin. I also remember that I was hurrying up extra much to get out as fast as possible. Basically I remember everything and I even thought pretty surely that nothing had happened maybe a minute after. But I’m still doubting that. Like, wouldn’t I remember that? Especially since I didn’t have any memory to doing this right afterwards.. Idk how to get rid of this thought like I know how to trust my memories but then I still doubt it even tho I know I’d remember it

I've been on Zoloft for about 39 days now and I've noticed a positive change. However, I've had an 'Aha!' moment. Sometimes, I get an intrusive thought and start to ruminate, but then something distracts me and hours later, I realize I stopped thinking about it. At first, I was worried, thinking, "Why am I not ruminating or trying to understand these thoughts? That's dangerous," because I often ruminate mentally. Then it dawned on me that my OCD had traumatized me into believing I needed to think constantly to protect myself from nonexistent dangers. I was so used to being trapped in my head, thinking it was keeping me safe, but it was actually keeping me from living my life. We're not meant to think all the time; we should be able to live without constantly checking our thoughts.

Hi everyone, I’m new here and this is my first post. For about a year now I have not drank any tap water (not even filtered). Somehow I became convinced a while back that my tap water was not safe to drink straight from the tap, and shortly after that I became convinced that filtered tap water was contaminated too (and that the filters themselves are somehow contaminated). Logically I know none of it makes sense, and I’m not even sure what I am afraid of happening if I do drink it. It doesn’t feel like a fear of getting sick, just an intense sense of dread at the thought of drinking the water. I also have some problems with drinking bottled water especially if I feel like I can taste the plastic. So I have almost exclusively drank canned sparkling water for a year now. Has anyone dealt with similar contamination fears?

so I just wanna know if the ERP is working or not. I still have a lot of repetitive thinking, but I don’t get anxiety around it anymore. I’m more or less emotion wise. Just get annoyed and tired that it is still trying to be repetitive in my mind. So I’m just curious is the ERP working or do I need to push a little harder?

Any of you ever accidentally say a a word mispronounced that sounds like a deity if another religion or the d*vil and then you worry if that means you worshipped another deity against your religion. Which wasnt my intent but if i mispronounce ir accidentally say the word i freak out

Hi everybody I have a quick question. I have been dating for a while and unfortunately we had to break up because of all the fights and troubles. We also had really really nice moments and I am pretty sad it didn't work out. Mostly had something to do with me boyfriends past. I have always been an overthinker, had lots of anxiety and stress etc. But last year was really bad sometimes. Now my question is; I am so scared due to all the stress (alternating with really good moment) causing cancer. Stress was always just 1 or 2 days, so not months on end. But I know stress decreaseds your immunsystem and therefore can cause cancer. I am not looking for reassurance regarding if stress does or does not cause cancer. But what I wanted to know is: is it my fault when eventually I do get cancer due to the stress? It was really a mix of things and the breakup was nobody's fault but it feels so annoying that now I don't have a boyfriend anymore and maybe I get cancer from all the stress... so I am beating myself up for not ending it sooner. There was no physical fight or anything, it just didn't work out and we both know this is for the best. Still I am mad at myself for all the stress I caused myself

I have been making progress with certain elements of OCD, however I still can't get comfortable with whether or not the stove is off when I go to sleep. I know I check it but if the knob feels slightly not over the off label I feel that the stove gas might be on and I don't know it. How do I overcome this?

I'm starting my OCD therapy in two days and I'm nervous. I'm hoping this helps because my intrusive thoughts have returned with a severity after I experienced several losses within a week. My mind feels so heavy and the way this feels, feels different than the other times. Am I just not processing things which is making my thoughts worse? Probably, but I'm stuck. And I'm angry I'm having to go through all of this because of a medication that was supposed to help me. Does anyone else experience a kind of cloudy mind with intrusive thoughts and you feel unsure about everything?

So I'm doing erp and it's going well or at least it was a thought arrived this morning it said "what if the reason your not doing that action is because your scared" and I was like well yeah because that's not who I am and then it moves on when ocd is gone and the fear "what if you do that action" and I started to panic any advice now I'm worried about the future about a what if question I know I'm not in to or like at all. Because it goes against who I am.

I feel like me and my best friend and ending for many reasons but when I talk to her about it she says it’s really all in my head and she doesn’t feel it at all. What is going on??

I don’t know if there is a light at the end of the tunnel anymore this feels so real I get headaches all the time and the thoughts are like if you come out it will go away and life will be back how if used to be i hate hate hate this just had enough I miss having attraction to women and it feeling natural and not a checking ritual this is hell and I just don’t know what to do I am so down every day with this I just don’t understand why this has happened to me I feel cursed it been 4 years now I never felt like this or had any thoughts like this as a kid or a teen this all started when I was in a toxic relationship with my ex girl friend and some one on a night shift said I can see why gay guys are happy they don’t have women in their life and bang ‼️ it started a thought out of no where saying I am gay on loop it been that way ever since I just want to be at peace it don’t help when I hear sexuality is fluid or on a spectrum that is very triggering for me and it don’t help that I have Aspergers as well which only magnifies this whole thing times a million I just feel so lost and have no idea what to do just want to be like I used be I feel like I have a massive chunk of my life robbed from me I feel so alone I have no problem with gay people at all you what you like I guess but me and don’t want to be like that I want to be with a women but my mind is like no you don’t it’s torturing this is can anybody help PLEASE !!

As soon as I wake up in the morning all I have in my head are these thoughts and it gives me an awful pit in my stomach. My brain tells me ‘you love someone else that you used to speak to’ ‘you want to be with them and not your partner’ the quotes go on. I love my current partner and I want these thoughts gone. I have had enough.

Hi! I am posting this NOT to give reassurance but more to give hope and help in people’s recovery. I have had really bad SOCD since I was 14 I’m 29 now and started experiencing false attraction for the first time which sent me spiraling and it was VERY debilitating and confusing. I can now say it’s been two months since I experienced it and I feel I have conquered this aspect of OCD and am no longer experiencing it. Now let me say that these feelings did not just “go away” but I put in the work. I sat with the ick, I didn’t overanalyze, I recognized it for what it was and let it go. Easier said than done I KNOW. Is it possible I will experience it again? Maybe. But if I do I know I can face it and overcome it once again. So yeah just wanted to share my recovery with you all and let you know it can and will happen for you too ☺️❤️