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Hidden compulsions are the worst! I just realized I was doing a compulsion 192938 times a day since one month Checking if person I like texted me or if he already answered or maybe left me on read , or blocking notifications to stop checking it all and then unlocking... i know it sounds like a silly compulsion but I was once "brutally" ghosted. So I check if I'm not being ghosted again. But it doesn't make sense cause this person is so awesome and not a ghost type at all ... I also do every evening since forever a symptom assessment (for like 1 hour)on smartphone app to check if I'm not going crazy cause I have problems focusing lately and other stuuf. ( my psychiatrist says 1 hour a day it's not that bad so it's not OCD symptom...) Also that" gost man" when we were still having contact called me "mental with mental disorder girl" cause I have little temper when I get upset (only sometimes)and one time I told him some silly stuff to upset him but it was out of frustration. Now I have this sentences he said in my head: "you're mental !!" , and when he calmed down : " I guess you have some mental disorder or you're crazy , I didn't do anything to you"... Since then when other people around me behave unserious or they act out of emotions or eccentric I call people crazy or mental and I assign them mental illness.. I wanna stop but I feel so hurt from the past and my head is tired from thinking . I feel like bad person but I really had lots of patience and empathy for people before that bloody " ghost man "

Hi, I was wondering if anyone experiencing this symptom. When anxiety kicks in from OCD thoughts and it’s strong, I sometimes feel actual pain in my head and I start to be over sensitive to sounds. At that point any kind of conversation or sound I feel it like a knife through my head, and my thoughts that time is like attacking these sounds or the person that starts the conservation with me. The more my love ones try to relax me the more my head reacts during the episode. At that time I feel like my head is going to explode and sometimes I get very frustrated and angry. The only thing that helps me that time, is time alone, just to breath, relax and try to get away from the thoughts, to put my attention somewhere else, and slowly slowly fades away. The moment I relax little I feel this noise in my ears and the pressure in my head and after a strong headache kicks in. The reason I ask this is because during this time I react toward the people I love and after the episode passes I feel sad and mad at my self for reacting that way. And I am trying to understand why I react this way...

How does OCD interfere with your reading and has anyone been successful at getting past it? :)

Hello, um I’m not really sure if this is the right place to talk and probably gonna get flagged; but lately I’ve been struggling to cope. Things are very bad and I don’t feel like i can do this anymore. Im scared to talk about my suicidal thoughts and don’t really know how to.. I’m 15 and have no clue what do to or what would happen?

Really disappointed in myself this morning. After about a week of not giving into any compulsions, I caved and went down a rabbit hole. Didn’t make me feel any better (of course). A little background, I have this “irrational” fear of getting in trouble with the law (even though I have never purposely committed a serious crime in my life). It partially stems from a real event, but certainly not all of it. I ruminate over things for hours and hours a day which is kind of a compulsion in itself. However my really bad compulsion is reading/checking crime reports, and reading peoples stories who have been in trouble. It never does me any good, and always makes me feel awful. Sorry for the rant, just a little bummed this morning, but I’ll get through it. Good luck to everyone on their journey today!

Can I please talk to somebody about my mother?

Okay y’all, I’m an open-minded ponderer. So I was wondering if the advocates in this community embraced any other type of treatment other than ERP. Like, what if there is another way to look at OCD? I think my OCD can make me feel extremely small, but also can help push me to do my best. I think we tend to talk about how hard this struggle is (because let’s be real, it’s terrible sometimes) but think about how considerate you are of others’ feelings because you are afraid of hurting them. Or, look at how good your grades are because you fear lack of organization. I think OCD is a two-way street, & there’s many ways to help yourself channel your energy for the better. :)

I’ve been doing so well the last two days. Then I took a walk and kept having the feeling that I had to go back and “check” things along my walk. I’m frustrated that I gave in to some of those urges because now the anxiety is welling you again. I’m already in the house and have the urge to go “check” something along my route but I’m waiting the feeling out and hoping (knowing) it’ll pass. Any encouragement is appreciated!

Can anybody please give me some support? Im so scared of having MS again and I literally can't stop worrying. I have to go sleep but I can't bc I'm so anxious

Imagine OCD is a parrot you adopted after someone else gave it up. It says some pretty wacky things learned from it's previous owner! - You wouldn't argue with a bird though. You'd be a bit shocked the first time, chuckle the second, and start to tune it out by the tenth. And you DEFINITELY wouldn't give it a snack every time it piped up with it's overused doomsday quotes. - OCD is like that parrot. It's talking, but it doesn't MEAN anything. But I promise you this- if you give it a compulsion cracker when it talks, it will say whatever it said a whole lot more insistently. Because "yummy! I want another!" It isn't malicious, just hungry. Or bored. Either one - And remember, interaction is more rewarding than the tastiest cracker. - Yes, ignoring it takes a ton of self control. At first the parrot will try even harder to get your attention and interaction. But eventually it will give up. -

I listen to a lot of ocd podcasts and watch a lot videos read a lot of articles. And I’m recently feeling a bit worried when I hea stories about how ocd has manifested in other people’s lives. A lot of people talk about experiencing some perfectionism as a kid, often counting or being afraid of germs. I don’t temper experiencing such things. I don’t think I’ve ever struggled with contamination ocd. I’ve only really struggled with pure o types of ocd. This leads me to worry “maybe it’s not ocd.” Does anyone else feel this way?

Monday check in: if your feelings were a Crayola crayon, what color would they be? What would you name the crayon?

I’ve been dealing with HOCD since January 8 and it all started with a friend telling me i give off a gay vibe and he could see me with a girl one day. i have anxiety disorder as well i thought i’d mention and i’m also 16. when it come to my HOCD it’s about the fear that i was never straight and the fear that i could potentially fall in love with a girl because i’ve seen this happen with friends and on movies the compulsions i did was avoiding things on instagram that showed same sex lesbian couples, movie or show edits like call me by your name, atypical, same sex couples edits in general. i used to love watching these edits and they had no attachment to me but i can’t stop relating it to myself. i’d stop listening to music from artist that were gay or gave off a gay vibe like billie eilish, frank ocean, clairo, tyler the creator- literally my fav artist. i’d follow a bunch of pages of boy on instagram even though before the bs started i never liked those pages cus i found them really cringy. i didn’t go on tiktok cus of the gay culture on there. i’d avoid news articles about LGBTQ+. i unfollowed many girls that reminded me of my obsession. for reassurance i would talk to myself in the mirror or in the shower or i’d pray or i’d ask people if i give off a gay vibe and the answer would always be “no sis you’re straight” felt good for like an hour then i thought would pop up and i’d go back into my depressed state. i didn’t go to school for a week cus of this. i’d pay so much attention to my downstairs area every time i’d look at pictures of girls For ERP i created a music playlist with all the artist that remind me of LGBTQ+, i made a folder in instagram with things that remind me of LGBTQ+ and when ever i get a thought or create hypothetical situation i let them play out and i let my mind run wild no matter how uncomfortable or depressed it makes me feel. i re-followed all the girls that remind me of my obsession. i made the movie call my by your name my phone background so i can get used to that anxiety i feel. keep in mind I’ve only been doing this for two days so if you’re gonna ask me if it’s worked, it’s a tiny tiny bit better but all progress is progress i think good advice is stop looking up things about HOCD and start looking up things about ERP because for me reading things about it was also my compulsion and reassurance and it’s not healthy. i love you all and i know we will all get back to our normal selves. ❤️?

With my HOCD i keep creating hypothetical situation that i don’t want to happen. like scenarios that i see in so many movies where the character is straight their whole life and then they meet someone of the same sex and they end up falling in love with them. i’m scared that will happen to me and i don’t want it too the thing is i used to love watching these movies and shows hat showed these scenarios cus i found them so wholesome and i just love love. for example Call my by your name, Alex strangelove, atypical i’ve watched these things so many times and i absolutely love them is there a way i can stop creating these hypothetical situations cus it’s the biggest thing i need to overcome. i feel like i know i’m not attracted to girls in that way i just need to stop making these hypothetical situations. thanks.

How do you guys connect with your significant others without scaring them about your ocd? I want to be open but it's hard to know what is too much... thanks

Feeling like everything is real right now?

Is there anyone who suffers from real event ocd ? I can’t find any help. I’m desperate. I’m in a really hard place right now. Anyone who can help please?

Everytime something I see or hear I’ll feel something down there and I don’t know why and like I won’t rly freak out much about it which is making me terrified now that like what if those feelings are true? Idk man I hate this :( I don’t wanna be a terrible person and I’m scared I’m disgusting. And my paranoia is getting to me like my friend hasn’t been speaking to me lately and it’s like I’m scared it’s bc of things I’ve said. Idk.

OCD and childhood trauma. Does anyone else have a formulation like this one. I. Currently seeing a therapist but it's focused prodominatly on childhood trauma I experienced. (in short. Sexual abuse) I and my therapist believe that thiz trauma has left me with inncurate belief that there is something fundamentally sinful or sordid about my sexuality due to the guilt and shame I took from these experiences, and a lot of the therapy is do used on challenging that belief a recognising I was a victim and a child, not a perperteator.. I believe that this also informs and is the cause for a lot of my harm OCD and pocd symptoms.... My therapist is a trauma therapist however and doesn't know much about OCD, although she says it seems to fit. I guess whata hard Is I don't know where my trauma starts and my OCD finishes and it generally makes the whole thing a lot less straight forward. Like is it even OCD or is it just my trauma has made me into a potentially sick and dangerous and twisted individual (this is where my OCD started I think because I read an article that victims of sexual abuse sometimes go in to abuse) and then I was like... Oh god what if that ends up being me', and the fear never went away until it became an obsession and I at times haven't left he house in fear I'm dangerous and spent hours and hours a day checking every thought and emotion and action for evidence. I guess yeah so.. I don't know what's trauma and whats OCD and where to get those answers and if making a disnction is even useful, if it's common for these to overlap, and how to help it cos treatment for each is very different. Hope that makes sense... Feeling a bit vulnerable now.

I need advice from anyone dealing with any sort of existential OCD. How do you get over the depressing feelings from your thoughts? My thoughts feel unbearable at times and I can't figure out how to cope. I've started ERP, but my mood gets so low sometimes because of these thoughts I feel like I can't handle it. To be more specific, my intrusive thoughts are from Andy Weir's story The Egg.