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Hey y’all i need to know if someone relates to what I’m going through. I feel almost like if I wanted to act on my thoughts but I actually don’t because this doesn’t please me at all. So if someone told me “You have Harm OCD” I would be like “really? So I don’t wanna harm people? Neither am I capable?” I have no clue why would that be my answer when I haven’t desired anything. But somehow it makes me feel like I do, and consequently makes me feel like I’m in denial. So it feels like if an unconscious part of me wants to do it but I am just resisting. I literally can’t go anywhere, I don’t wanna live any second more, because I feel so disturbed all the time. I feel like I’m gonna end up doing it, I feel so overwhelmed by these feelings,thoughts, images, urges, that I would avoid everything, like going anywhere. I hate feeling like this but I feel like there’s no way back, i can’t picture myself being good in the future because I feel like “this is what i want” when it’s not. I feel like it’s a time bomb for me to do something. I do not tolerate this, every minute that passes by I feel it closer to happen. I feel like I’m gonna collapse and act on it. I don’t even know if that’s what I want, but I don’t think it is, I think it just feels like it. Help I don’t know what to do.

My almost 11 year old (in 1 1/2 weeks) son, has just started experiencing Moral OCD. Now that I’m understanding more and more about this type of OCD, I guess there might have been signs of other behaviors, but nothing that interferes with his day to day life. He is having deeply disturbing thoughts over and over! Then he feels the need to confess, I’ve asked him to stop confessing about 2 days ago, and the anxiety has gotten so bad, I’m on the verge of letting him confess them because it’s heartbreaking. He wants to same reassurance over and over and over. Asking the same questions as if we didn’t have a conversation 2 seconds prior! At this point, I need reassurance! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Ocd and depression. Does anyone have depression with ocd? If so, do you think your depression was caused by your ocd?

Help omg. I don’t want to do anything that my thoughts say but it feels like I’m not gonna be fine until I do them. It’s so horrible because it feels like they’re my intentions or like I’m going to do them every single time I’m with my family. I literally find myself incapable to do anything because my mind is constantly repeating me to harm my family which is terrible!! I have no idea what is going on, and if this is normal for OCD or not. It disturbs me so much to feel that I can’t escape this, I can’t stand it anymore and I’m afraid i might end up doing it. I feel so trapped. I don’t wanna live anymore but I don’t wanna die either. I just wanna disappear.

i’m about to tell my mom about what i said in my last post i can’t do this

Any ideas for ERP for a fear of having a foot fetish? And having (hopefully unwanted) groinal responses while glancing at women’s feet? I feel trapped.

I have harm/Suicidal OCD subtype (included with my pure O) and I haven't acted on the harm thoughts, but they have become MUCH WORSE because of stupid ERP and I don't know what to do because obviously it's really upsetting and unsettling that I would even imagine self harming.

my ocd is so bad in the morning :(

I feel like no one knows the real me, I dont even know the real me anymore. OCD has been my identity for so long I always wonder who the f would I be without it. My thoughts and opinions change so rapidly I dont know if their my own anymore. My moods and emotions are so up and down I'm wondering what's the real way that I feel. Have I just been lying all my life.

Ok y’all i need help with something. Its related to racism and clothing. I saw this incredibly cute online store but i didn’t see much representation on it so i googled to see if it was racist but instead found that there was a controversy with this one designer who had a launch on their site. Online people were signing a petition that said white boutique (which is also why i feared it was racist) no to Sarah’s day. Sarahs day is the person being racist and homophobic and sending hate. I feel dumb for asking but should i not even shop at this store because of this person? Or is that extreme and should i just not purchase anything from that designers line? There are other stores out there but i don’t want to do something that my potentially strengthen my Ocd. Please help.

POCD has really started to make watching anime impossible for me. Since most anime characters are usually in high school or teens it’s really triggering for me now that i’m 20 almost 21 and no longer the same age as them. It’s really hard for me to watch anime without pausing or rewinding and looking at pictures of characters and analyzing their attractiveness to see if my feelings are normal or indicative of me being a monster. It’s like i can’t just recognize that a character can be drawn attractive without feeling like i have to be sexually attracted to them to think this way or that i can’t recognize any sort of sexual/attractive appeal without being a horrible person. I get that anime characters aren’t real and are drawn to be exaggerated and attractive and some characters look way older than they are but my black and white thinking makes it hard to not over analyze my feelings when the character is given and age of like 13-17. Groinal responses make this even harder and make me feel even worse sometimes, when i sit there trying to analyze my feelings towards a character and i have a groinal response it spikes my anxiety as I feel i just received proof i’m a monster. I just would like to watch anime again like i used to enjoy it.

Please help — not looking for reassurance but for advice/support! Exactly a year ago I hit my low. I had meltdowns/breakdowns frequently and felt absolutely overwhelmed and hopeless. I did nothing — no hobbies, no friends, no school. I didn’t even wash my own hair, I had my mom do it. I laid on a mattress on the floor almost all day. I truly hit rock bottom. OCD completely ruled and defined my life. In September-November 2020 I broke free and made lots of progress, applying ERP all on my own! In December 2020 I saw a NOCD therapist and my life truly looked up from there. In March I felt I basically had this thing wrapped up, I was rocking right along with ERP and enjoying my life again! I was doing school and my hobbies and even chasing my career again! But then I hit a terrible backdoor spike that I haven’t been able to get over for 2.5 months now??? I am back to dreading every single day because I know it will be more of the same, instead of feeling hope about the future. Daily existing is so hard I distract myself on my phone or with music all day. Anything to escape. I’ve missed three days of schoolwork now. I can’t believe I am back in this depression again. I just can’t stop my compulsions even though I know they are in my control!! Ahh sorry for the rant, but I hate this so much!! I was feeling so good and actually enjoying my life again, hanging out with friends and chasing after my career and liking my life again. Now I just cry and hate my daily existence again because I am having so much trouble stopping my compulsions. Today I just cried on the floor in my room. I’m SOOO upset that I’m in this terrible place again and don’t know how to get out of it. 😭 Sorry for the rant guys😩😩😩 ANY advice for how to deal with a backdoor spike? I KNOW that it’s just stupid freaking OCD and that you deal with it the same as you do any other obsession, but I’m having the hardest time with this and I don’t know why!!! It’s causing me such terrible depression again. 😭 (Also, the backdoor spike is literally just an obsession about rumination. The entire obsession is just the horrible awareness that I don’t know how to stop ruminating about this obsession. It’s rumination about rumination. SO stupid right? Not any serious theme, just an obsession about refraining from rumination right or wrong!)

I think I'm too young for hocd bcoz I'm only 16 year old

How did you guys realize you had ocd or something else than just anxiety going on? Like what was your discovery For me I always knew my anxiety was very different than what my peers were experiencing and in general just knew something was a bit off with myself, I was afraid to get help for so long bc I was afraid that my ocd was just who I was but then I started doing research and things started to make a whole lotta sense. I’ve been doing the work and have been in recovery for approximately a year

Intrusive thoughts are mental facts, haha don't chase after them just smell em and walk away haha they will eventually go away on their own.

Hey everyone my name is (irrelevant) I'm a 20, year old female. . I have these thoughts. Random unwanted thoughts. That I highly dislike (intrusive thoughts) they're usually highly graphic and vivid. Normally about children. But the thing is. I hate it. I dont like the thoughts (obviously) I dont want to harm a child. I would never do that the thoughts disgust me. When I am around a child and a thought pops up. Its absolutely disgusting and I would never act on them because I don't have the urge or desire to act upon them. . I know it's all in my head. And the fact that the more i allow myself to dwell and obsess over them. The more it'll harm me and get to me. I just wanna know I'm not the only one who has this same issue.

The LGBTQ+ community is such a trigger for my OCD to the point where I will try to go against the community because it causes so many triggers for me like what if i'm lesbian, maybe I'm non-binary because I don't identify with alot of womanly things well the typical things anyway, I'm not even a boyish woman either so that plays into OCD, the gender thing is a very new occurrence and I'm realising how OCD will take everything in my life and make it about themselves. I'm beginning to remember when I first developed sexual orientation OCD (I didn't know it was a thing at the time) it all started because I wanted to become accepting of the LGBTQ+ community (I used to be quite homophobic, I'm not anymore) so I started doing research which meant watching a lot of youtube videos especially coming out videos and instead of being like okay being gay is okay my OCD self had to be like now you're probably gay, it's like I cant accept or agree with a community without actually being apart of it, it's such an OCD thing. So anyway what made me remember this is because I was doing something similar today because I've learnt to accept transgender and non-binary people and I was watching a youtube video where this person that identifies as non-binary said a few things I could relate to, my OCD brain thought oh so you're probaby non-binary. Its like why cant I just learn new things, accept people but not have OCD feel like I have to identify the same as them. Thankfully the gender OCD isn't going to be a thing for me because I've spotted it very early so I can keep my eye on it and make sure I'm not doing OCD behaviours around my gender.

Lately it feels like I find my partner off-putting?? I think it’s a mixture of my soocd/rocd and an overall disconnection due to long distance for 7 months now but I feel horrible. I was looking at pictures of my partner and I felt like he was ugly??? I usually see his pictures and think “Wow 🥰” but now it’s like when my rocd first kicked in and I’m worrying about silly things again and I’m having trouble picturing a future with him? I’ve just been going through the motions and I hate it because I want to get that spark back with him. I’m sure long distance is playing a HUGE factor but I also don’t know how much of it is rocd? I love him, I’ll always love him, I want to be with him. I still want a future with him. But right now thinking of him just...hurts. I’m just scared of losing him or losing my love for him. I’m scared that this means our connection isn’t real. I want to see him so badly and I’m so afraid of losing our connection but as I type this I feel normal and that makes me feel guilty. It’s just been so long since I’ve held him..so long since we’ve been in each other’s presence. It takes a toll on me, I miss the person I am when he’s around. I miss him. I miss his energy, I miss his smile, I miss his scent and his arms wrapped around me. I miss how comfortable and happy I was when he was around. I miss being able to see him every Monday and Friday without fail. I miss everything. I know love is a choice and so I’ll continue to power through even with this disconnection but I’m so afraid I’ll never get back to my lovey-dovey self with him

Anybody have advice on groinal responses.

So I learned about what the dark web actually is today. I’d heard about it but never really knew what it was. Upon a few google searches I found out it’s a breeding ground for all things illegal. Everything from illegal porn, guns, hit men. But now I’m really scared the dark web is gonna find me just for looking into what it is. I’m scared I’m gonna end up dead even though I didn’t access it. I don’t want to access that place. The only thing that tried to open was some site from the dark web but wouldn’t open because apparently you have to have some super special browser or something.