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i have some "gay" and "manly" mannerisms especially that my hands look so manly and it makes me feel like i am a lesbian and i would look in the mirror and have this thought of "omg you're so gay just accept it already" ans it sounds like i am in denial and i don't even panic a lot anymore :(

CompHet (compulsory hetrosexuality) is something I find quite problematic even for those who dont have SOOCD. If you are unaware of what comphet is in the modern term, it's a lesbian masterdoc that was first posted on tumblr I believe, its essential goal is to "help" women see if they are just attracted to men by default by giving you all these bullet points, signs, reasons or scenarios that might tell you if you're actually a lesbian that's just getting with men because it's a societal norm. The main reasons I find it problematic is its need to label you into a neat little box: sexuality is a spectrum and we won't always be on one extreme end (straight or gay) we can float in between throughout our lives, depending on who we fall in love with. I also think it plays into bisexual erasure, bisexual people are already misunderstood as it is this masterdoc doesn't help that, it is possible that people can be bisexual in this case women and depending on who they meet in their lives it might appear to lean more towards one gender but it doesn't mean they're not bisexual. Another reason I find it problematic is the scenarios it uses to "prove" that you could in fact be a lesbian especially the sexual ones with men because alot of them could be due to a woman having gone through sexual trauma in her life and lets be honest alot of us more than not, have sadly. The last thing I find odd about it is the fact its only targeted towards women, so does that mean men can't fall victim to comphet because in my opinion men have alot more to lose essentially by not being straight as society unfortunately is alot less accepting of gay men or men that arent straight. That's just my rant, I'm sorry if it offended anyone. I think it could be useful but theres too many ways I find it problematic and I'd be saying that even if I didnt have OCD, as the whole doc gives me OCD vibes, the need to say you're one over the other for that certainty, instead of just accepting that maybe you're not one or the other and that's fine also.

Seeing celebs like Liza Koshy coming out just makes me feel like it’s inevitable and that I just need to accept that I’m just in denial

Okay, this is a really specific and embarrassing thing that I’ve been ruminating on to the point of exhaustion since yesterday, if someone could read this and try and give me some advice, I’d really appreciate it. It feels like too personal & embarrassing of an issue to go to family & friends about, and I know that there will hopefully be a lot of likeminded individuals here, who understand what it’s like to have a tendency towards obsession. So, my friend brought me along with her to apply for a new job. I’m 16 (17 in July), and have been looking for a little part time job to do alongside school. We walked in, and it was this room of about 12 people who had all previously applied for the job. Me and my friend were applying for waitressing. There was two owners of the resteraunt there that day, one Italian man, and one British man (I’m British - live in England) The second guy would just stare at me intently while he was talking, and never looked at anyone else, and it felt uncomfortable and it seemed like he was attracted to me - bear in mind he knew I was 16, and he was probably in his mid to late 30s. He was telling us an anecdote about how you can never ‘get away’ with being off work sick when you’ve been drinking in a pub/club the night prior, because he’s on a group chat with all of the pubs/clubs in our area, and he will know if you have been drinking the night before. Because of how much he was staring at me, I had to respond to him saying, ‘well, you won’t have to worry about me because I’m only 16!’ And everyone laughed, and then the Italian man said - ‘look, you are staring at her haha!’. My friend afterwards was like, ‘what the fuck, that man would not stop staring at you’ - and it made me not want to go back, because it just felt really weird and uncomfortable. A couple of days after our first shift, me and my friend found out that this man and another co-owner (not the Italian man) were actually gay together… now, this is where things got slightly obsessional. I am a perfectionist when it comes to my appearance, I’m never happy unless I feel that I look pretty and feminine. I’m HIGHLY critical of my own appearance, and am constantly checking myself to see if I look okay. If I feel that I don’t, then my mood drops instantly and I usually want to leave the situation I’m in - that’s how much I obsess over appearance. This guy was giving off the vibes that he was attracted to me - but he was gay… (not to go off of stereotypes, but he SEEMED like a straight male, if that makes sense) I started to have this horrible feeling in my chest, like intense dread and disgust with myself. ‘What if I look like a man?’ I thought. ‘His boyfriend is quite feminine, what if I look sort of like him?’ Each time I thought this, I was almost brought to tears it was that devastating of a possibility. I try so, so hard to be pretty, and the idea that I could appear masculine in any regard was like my life was crumbling around besides me, and I KNOW how dramatic that sounds, but it was just how I felt. Has anyone got any thoughts on this? I’ve not stopped thinking about it since I heard…

Has anyone else struggled with OCD when it comes to obsessing over things like social injustice and finding solutions to societal problems? I haven’t met anyone who shares this with me. It really messed me up bad the last year and a half. Then I started to obsess over my own morality and finding a perfect answer for all of the worlds problems. It’s been much better since joining NOCD though and I’ve learned to manage it.

Someone suggested me that I study psychology to treat ocd and to that person that's the best way to treat ocd and medication and therapy isn't needed. Also according to that person medication especially is bad for treatment. How true is that? I need an answer asap because that got me really anxious especially because I'm on medication.

please help i literally can't do this there's so many proofs from my childhood of me being gay, and whenever i try not ruminating over the thoughts it feels like i am ignoring them and not bringing them up and being selective which means i am in denial. and to add to all of that there's not that much anxiety caused by the thoughts which concerns me even more. this really feels like denial and i feel miserable, added the fact that i fit and know so many gay stereotypes it must mean something. i really feel desperate and in denial y'all i can't accept it. i can't say well yeah maybe i am bi maybe not because it feels like accepting i am bi/lesbian.

I started vaping not even 2 weeks ago. I haven’t finished my vape which is a cuvie plus, but now I’m worried about my health and lung cancer. Ik it’s my fault I’m just scared...

How do I know if I actually need help? I don’t know if how I feel is serious enough to the point where I need to talk to someone. I’ve had obsessive thoughts over HOCD for over a week now and they cause me such a sick feeling in my stomach to the point where it boils over and I start hyperventilating and cry and self harm but sometimes it feels like I’m faking it for attention or exaggerating how I feel even though no one literally knows I’m like this or sees me like that. I feel like deleting all my social media so I don’t see triggers. I feel nauseous and sick 24/7 and seeing anything having to do with a relationship makes me want to cry. In the past I’ve had obsessive thoughts over what I was going to eat. I kept going in and out of calorie counting and always obsessing over whether or not I should skip a meal or whether I’d be able to hold out or how many calories I may have eaten/burned. I felt like I had no control over whether or not I’d binge. Now I stopped doing that because I just started binge eating instead but I really want to lose weight still. Could these types of obsessive thoughts be OCD too? I would literally think about food 24/7 and not even homework could distract me from it but when I actually binged I’d get so angry at myself and frustrated it was like a never ending cycle. I don’t even know if I actually have OCD I don’t know if I should seek help and I definitely am NOT telling my parents about my HOCD thoughts there’s no way. What should I do??

distraction post: what's your favourite dish??

Any other Christians have an obsession that they will go against their values? I am so afraid I am going to start doing things other people do that are wrong in my beliefs

Please tell me I’m not alone in this. I read an article today because I’m trying to do more exposures. It was very violent and it instantly triggered violent thoughts towards my mom which is something I’ve been dealing on and off with for the last couple of days. I kept telling myself it was just a thought and that I was triggered by the article. I ended up going out with my mom and it just progressively got worse because I kept reassuring myself that I wouldn’t hurt her but then I got the worse possible thought possible and it was what if I have to hurt her to make the thoughts stop and that just TERRIFIED me. I don’t want to hurt my mom and I know that won’t stop the thoughts. But now I’m scared that I’m going to somehow convince myself that that’s what I have to do

Anyone on here been diagnosed with ADHD?

i’m going to have a panic attack (i beg that u read) i became very close with this guy i met on omeagle a he definitely told me he was 17 and i told him i was 15 (which i am) and forward a few months he is the guy i go to for mental health support because he has been through the same. and i told him about my first bf when i got him. but then this guy started to get a bit too interested and he asked for nudes. i said no. but then considered what if my bf wants them ?? i want to know that he would like what he saw. so i asked him ( the omeagle guy ) if he would tell me honestly if my bf would like it. it wasn’t a nude it was litterally a bikini top. that’s all. and i’m not gifted so nothing was showing. he told me my bf would love it etc etc. and i was happy. but the omeagle guy got more interested and because i felt like i liked it i kept using it as proof that i’m not gay. and me thinking he was 17 i kind of let it happen as banter while continuously reminding him that we are just friends and i have a bf and he said yes he understands. today he told me he’s 18. making him an adult and me a minor. and he’s telling me i told him i’m 16 when i’ve had 15 in my bio for ages and i told him i’m 15. i’m scared i’m going to be arrested or that he still has that pic of me but he’s screen recorded his camera roll to make me feel assured that he doesn’t have it. i’m reallly panicking what do i do

I cant fucking sleep haven't spoken with my girl in 3 days after I told her my mistakes i made. Ofc a spike in HOCD. 5 years and I feel absolutely lost. Im scared to see her with someone else and I hurt her with my stupid mistake i regret so bad and wish to make things right.

This is driving me nuts I don't know if this is reality or not or the thoughts are real. The thought of being with man disgusts me 😔

Just woke up from having loads of dreams. some of them were quite sexual involving women and some of them were involving having to choose a sexuality and bisexual kept popping up. Trying really hard to just accept uncertainty and not dwell on it but it’s very difficult when it shows up in dreams too :( I don’t get much anxiety towards this anymore either which I worry is a sign it’s true.

is ocd genetic?

My ROCD is driving me insane lately. It's not giving me that much anxiety, which I know isn't a bad sign. But there's always that "if it's not making you anxious, it means you don't care" or something like that in the back of my mind. I get thoughts that I don't love him, or that he's just a friend (this one is because I don't enjoy sex that much.) I see myself putting too much thought into sex, as it isn't the most important thing in a relationship, but then I also see it as "if you're not having sex then you technically are just friends." Because that's like the difference between platonic and romantic. Another thing is the intrusive imaginations. Like, I'll imagine myself telling him I no longer love him, that I'm just not feeling it anymore, that he's not attractive enough, tall enough, or I think that everything he does is annoying/cringey even though it isn't, and the list goes on. We also live together, so it's hard because it breaks my heart to imagine doing those things, but I also know a lot of people who also get upset when breaking up with people even though it's what they "have" to do. You know, those couples that, nothing really went wrong, things just "weren't working." I'm scared I'll end up like that, where nothing is wrong, but I just don't feel the same anymore. Anyway, I just really wanted to get that off my chest. The part that bugs me the most is definitely the "just friends" thing because it's the most realistic.

distraction post: what's your favourite movie?