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Im overwhelmed and stressed. My child was talking to me and i worrt about groinals but I didnt want to ignore them so i look at them when they talk to me.

So I’ve been having these weird guilt issues and I feel like I’m lying to myself. I had this weird thing where I thought I had feelings for children even though this is 100% not what I want and it goes against my moral code. But I keep trying to make sure that I feel 100% sure that this is the truth. It is just more distressing and causing more issues. Can anyone help please or have some advice? Thank you:)

I saw a comment of someone and now my brain is thinking "now you need to m*sturbte yourself thinking in your sister" Im crying, this intrusive thoughts makes me want to cry, I don't want this thought, ah and it gets stuck in my head, HELP ah I'm in crisis, please The week was really good and now this nightmare thought is stuck on my head I'm terrified I don't want this thought, why stills on my brain? Ahhhhh is torture help I feel my day is contaminated my brain with this thought help

This is my first talking talking about my worst intrusive thoughts... •On 2018 I was on the beach having fun with my family so happy and then the worst intrusive thought," I like my sister" I cried after that,I feel so bad, the whole vacation I spent crying because of that thought, •On 2021 I was on the car on my way to Christmas Dinner, my sister was close to me and the worst intrusive thought was back " I like my sister" I almost cry in the car, but since that day the thought was on my mind I was so scared, that year was a nightmare, the whole time I was terrified of my brain •On 2022(worst year of my life) I had a crush on a girl,she invited me to her Anime Halloween party I was so happy buying my costume (Undertaker from black Butler) and I bought her mangas, I was about to tell her my feelings that night, but I drank a lot vodka, I was so drunk but that night was another familiar party so, when I was in the other party (a familiar party) I was telling my sister look this girl she's so pretty I like her, (I showed a photo of me and my crush) and I was talking about I want to kiss my crush, that moment I got the worst intrusive thought " I want to kiss my sister" I ran to the bathroom to cry and vomit, I was scared because drunk people said the true so was true? Ah I was so scared of myself crying, since that day I got two suicide episodes, depression anxiety, everything that reminds me that day is my torture, everything even the words, even I thought about if I like women or not, I'm traumatized,because reminds me that day, I can't even watch anything related to that day, I feel so disgusted, since that day in scared to drink alcohol, I'm scared of have something sexual because that that appears on my head I'm scared of that years and everything related, Please if someone can say something to me, because I feel so bad since that day thats my biggest fear I don't want this is a torture, I even take pills I feel like I'm the worst person

Can’t even look for jobs or consider any type of job that has anything to do with being around kids, my brain just tells me I want to work there for a bad reason, the thoughts feel so real, it tells me that I am a P. I just want to be normal. I can’t even look at myself, I just feel like there’s something off about me, and that I’m a bad person.

18+ please! Sorry if this inappropriate. Does anyone else deal with the consequences of having consumed pornography and has ocd? Can you tell me if you also have a lot of intrusive thoughts during sexual activity? I'm not proud to say that I had access to this type of content at a young age and it grew with me until the first years of my adult life. I only became aware of the extent of the damage when I received my ocd diagnosis and even though my therapist and I believe that I have had ocd since childhood, addiction to pornography was an important factor in making the disorder worse since I suffer from graphic images and sexual content intrusive thoughts I've been trying to learn how to have a good relationship with my sexuality without using pornography for a few months, but it's not always easy to use my imagination when I have some tabs open in my head that get in my way. I really can't and don't want to have access to any type of adult content anymore, but I always think it's easier to be able to "silence" intrusive thoughts. It's happened several times where I try to use my imagination and then I have an intrusive thought and I think I stimulated myself by thinking about it and it's just disgusting and I feel really bad. I've been trying to deal with this for months and with medical help for both problems, I really feel dirty and lost about it and I don't know how to make it stop. I spent days avoiding even thinking about anything sexual so I wouldn't have to deal with it, but my therapist said that this is also unhealthy and can become a compulsion, so I don't know what to do. Anyone who goes through/has gone through something similar?

First I would like to say is that tw and I also can’t afford a therapist and please give me advice I have no peace in my mind I just want to be a normal person again. Since 2022 I have been getting filthy unwanted sexual thoughts towards children I feel awful about it because it goes against my morals and characters as a human being. I feel like a horrible person and I feel like I have no rest in my mind, everyday it’s the same thoughts that torment me and I happens all hours of the day there’s not an hour that goes by the day that I don’t get these ugly horrible thoughts. I recently started getting “feelings” down there and I hate it. These thoughts came back again stronger this February. I also believe in Christ so if you have advice of how I can pray against this because I don’t really know what’s the root of these thoughts. As long as I have these thoughts I can never be free these thoughts have put me back into a state of depression and well as suicidal thoughts I just feel like I’m living hell on earth I am also 17 years old female, so please someone help me. I have tried praying against these thoughts but nothing, I have tried deliverance prayers worship etc but nothing. — I also tagged Christian ocd for advice !!

I was doing fine until I went out in public and now I’m spiraling and feeling sick. It makes me feel like I’m a sicko and like I want it and it gives me so much anxiety. I feel like I know that my core beliefs are I want to be a good person, I would never do that but OCD makes me question if I’m faking it and then I just feel sick all over again. This is seriously so exhausting. Any words would help. I just want to get to where actual children don’t trigger me anymore.

Hello I’m 16 I have always had girlfriends and liked girls about 5 months ago I was on a call with friends and they said I was gay and made me take a gay test I got gay and I was very worried and had lots of anxiety I had intrusive thoughts and images at first I have lost full attraction to girls fast foward to now not that much anxiety or intrusive thoughts my mind says oh that guy is hot and I get like nerves idk if that’s anxiety and I always stare at guys I don’t know if that means I’m bi or gay or if it’s ocd I was never like this before though never questioned my sexually never someone please explain

So I haven’t been getting intrusive thoughts as much but I have been thinking that maybe I force the thoughts and am really a bad person just tricking myself into thinking I might have ocd but in reality I want these things to happen but I know I don’t and idk what to do or if I’m just a bad person it hurts me a lot.

My adult son is suffering so much. He is basically non-functioning. He can’t get a job, focus on his college classes, or do much around the house because of his intrusive thoughts. He doesn’t want to hang out with his friends because his intrusive thoughts make him think he wants to be with them sexually. He refuses to take medicine or go to therapy because he is afraid that it will somehow prove that he doesn’t have OCD. He relies on me 100% to help with his OCD. It’s not working. He suffered for four years not knowing what it was, then finally broke down and told me about it about nine months ago. He stopped doing all drugs (he was self medicating). He’s an adult and can refuse treatment, but any advice about how I can encourage him to at least try would be greatly appreciated. Note: he did try Zoloft for a month and said it made his anxiety better which made him worry even more. Thanks.

Constantly struggling with the thought of "Am I a pedophile?" I have never harmed a child but have had horrible thoughts. Where's the line? If I have to ask does that mean I am one? Feeling suicidal and in need of support.

Hi, I’m not new here, and if you’ve seen any other of my posts you’ll know I’m undiagnosed, i don’t know if I have ocd The thing is, I think I’ve struggled with ZOCD (which is super super super horrible, since I’m a super fan animals) since 2022, but since last November it has became so horrible, and the worst part is that I think I have false memories too, so a really bad combination I’ve been working a lot, to the point that I’m not longer afraid of being in the same house as my dog (I was so afraid of it) but I still have some horrible thoughts that I’m gonna do something bad to one, and I have this intrusive images that make me think that this images aren’t imahes but repressed memories (since the images appear the exact moment when I’m for example petting the dog or washing the mares that babysit sometimes) But although that, I thought I was getting better but I have now this fear of impusivy acting on an image and it scares me a lot, but I try to not avoid things because I’m 80% convinced that I have ocd The thing is, today I was at school and I was writing with my black pen, blue pen and my red color and sometimes when I write the ink falls over my fingers, and gets in my nails. After I stoped writing, I and took a long time while packing my stuff in my backpack, and I was leaving my seat of the outside table because it was time to go home and this dog (I’m in Mexico, and sometimes dogs live in the universitys) wanted to greet me, and she was really cute so I pet her as an exposure I think, but then I had to walk past her to get to get to the exit, so I got mentally brave and passed by her side without grabbing both of my hands (I do that when I’m scared of involuntary doing something horrible) , but I got this image of me doing something horrible to her, and i first was like, of course that didn’t happen, but then my mind focused in one finger (I think was the one that I used to close my backpack) and I checked this finger and had like a little purple ink it, and now I’m freaking out because what if the image happen and I did something horrible to her, an the ink isn’t ink but blood or something (even though it seems like ink, since some pens ink turn a little purple when dried and the red color could have helped) but I’m freaking out now, I’m trying to recreate the exact same ink colour on my other nails to make myself sure that it was ink and not something else, the problem is that the pen is not working and I don’t have another pen of that exact brand so I don’t know what else to do I’m scared, and if it where true I could not live anymore, and I’m scared that I didn’t noticed that that hypothetical did happen but that that other people did noticed (if it were true) and they are going to think I’m bad person and I just never know and my life is gonna be a lie or that I’m just in denial AAAAA Please please help me :((

18+ I remember a few years ago I was still getting dressed and my gf opened the door to her younger brother without noticing I was still changing and he’s like a little over 3 years younger than me. he must’ve been 14-15 at the time. But I had my bra on I was just putting on my shirt and I can’t remember why but I didn’t say anything even though I noticed. I’m scared I traumatized him. It took my girlfriend like 10 seconds to realize I was still getting dressed. I was kind of off to the side but it looked like he saw me so yeah.

My entire life anytime I saw something on the news or heard about someone hurting a child sexually or beating/killing them, I would get so angry and sick over it. I still do but ever since developing ocd, my ocd tells me i’m just like those people and really tries to make me believe it and question myself. This theme also latches onto my own family and my children. It’s the hardest and worst theme i’ve had. It makes me not want to live and is so unbearable😩😢

So, I was doing better last night because I was actually able to calm myself down, but now I’m worrying again. When I was little, I think I did some incest-related things. Nothing too extreme, but now I know better and I would never ever engage in those activities again. I don’t know how normal this is. I’m not attracted to ANY of my family members, but I feel so much shame and disgust when I think about what I did. How did I think that was okay? I feel so disgusting because I know how wrong incest is. Again, I did not do anything extreme but the fact that I did anything incest-related at all is scary. I don’t remember if I was aroused doing all of this, but if i was, then that would mean I was incestuous. This is so tiring and overwhelming, one minute I’ll feel better, the next minute, I’m worrying and ruminating. I feel so disgusting and I dont know how to stop these negative thoughts. I know how wrong incest is and would NEVER engage in those activities today. Please help me.

*big sigh* I’ve gotten in contact with a therapist for my POCD AND harm ocd. I know with ERP the therapy is just meant to assess the behavior part of OCD but they don’t really pay attention to the emotions we feel about the OCD itself. Lately I been kinda on reserve emotionally with my kids. Example, im so scared with my OCD and how to properly react with my kids that I’ve scripted a few ways to interact with them because I thought to myself “well I haven’t received the therapy yet and I do t want to react in a way I shouldn’t” so I kinda fake these scripted behaviors so that people think im still functioning normally. My POCD has scared me to my fucking core to the point that I can’t even think straight when I’m around my kid sometimes because I’m so frozen with fear and I used to enough being around her and now I almost get uncomfortable with her around because I already expect the thoughts or worse the groinals. I want to feel like her protective mama bear again but like some sicko. I’m so filled with guilt shame and hate towards myself but also I feel like I’m not working to be her mother. I want to feel happiness around my family not this high stressed and ugly feeling. I’m emotionally disconnected from my family. OCD has stolen my life from me.

After that triggering dream where the worst thing could have happened, I don't feel legimitated anymore to feel genuinely distressed by triggers, to call compulsions as such. It all feels disingenuous. They don't feel valid anymore. Like crocodile tears. Because the one thing I didn't want to happen probably happened, that undoes everything else. I feel like a hypocrite, to feel distress and worry about those things, being anxious of that particular fear because in that dream it happened. I felt arousal and probably genuine attraction, I'm afraid that I could have agreed with it. Maybe it isn't true, maybe it didn't happen, maybe I'm misinterpreting, but then why I was left with that impression? All because of a damn dream, because ocd, all my triggers intrude even in my sleep, because I can't even be safe in my dreams. This is the worst mental illness.

This is really dumb probably, and maybe aimed at people around my age and possibly older. But how many of you are familiar with vocaloid? Basically if your not then maybe you won’t know what I’m talking about but when I was in middle school I got really into vocaloid and like all people at some point I discovered the really popular song “magnet”. It’s a song between the two robot girls “Miku & Luka” the song itself is really dumb but cute it’s about two girls who can’t be in love because-their girls-(it’s dumb Ik) this is their oldest song it’s like 15 yrs old. And because of this song so many more spawned of these two girls being in love. And I liked them a lot when I was a kid and into early high school and lowkey discovered my sexuality through them? (One of many reasons) Point is a lot of ppl in this community ship them together because of this song and many others. When i was like 16 I uploaded a lot of ship art of them on my Pinterest and saved them so I can look at them. I’m not really into vocaloid all that much anymore but today I saw a comment on one of the pictures I uploaded saying that “but luka is 20..” and that’s when I remembered that ppl don’t like this ship because miku is said to be 16 and Luka 20 years old. When I was younger I never really thought about it because the community loves them together and even still today like millions of ppl have watched their songs- and now as I got older and lost interest I realize that maybe it is really bad that I liked them? And what if that person that uploaded that comment thinks I support P’s or worse that IAM one. I’m in a lot of destress because of it I don’t support P’s I’m not a P I don’t ever want to be one I’m so scared that this person will spread around that I’m a P or worse and I’m not. I want to delete all the pictures I uploaded because I’m scared. I don’t really know what to do. I never really thought about them like that. Sorry if this is a dumb I already spoke to my mom but I’m still freaking out-what do I do? What do I need to do?

Am I the only one who gets truly terrible and graphic intrusive images? They're too much.