- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 1y
Relationships can be challenging for everyone. What are some ways OCD has come into your relationship and added extra struggles?
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Relationships can be challenging for everyone. What are some ways OCD has come into your relationship and added extra struggles?
I feel completely unlovable. I have a difficult time getting close to people because of my OCD and I have to force myself to not compulsively seek reassurance. I feel like I’ll never find my person. I’m worried I’ll be an awful wife because of my inability to do anything. I want to show up for my partner, but I feel stuck because of my OCD. I think it’s safer to just be alone.
He’s made it clear he will never trust me again but i don’t get why he is still with me if i could never earn it back? i get nervous and anxious everyday just waiting for a message that he is done with me even though i wouldn’t want it to be like that ever. It’s a wave of mixed emotions and i don’t know how to express them. i know i am the reason he won’t be able to trust me but i’ve given him second chances and i don’t know what to do or how to feel all i know is that i feel anxious everyday just thinking about us.
I have been broken so many times that i dont even know. Every person i was with cheated on me and just been the worst to me which got to one point that i wanted to kill myself but now i have a boyfriend that i have been for one year and a half but he has been acting weird. I check his phone and look for things i dont find nothing. He goes to the park with his cousin that is a baddddd influence on him like really bad and he hasnt been being good with me and i just dont understand what im doing wrong. I tell him stop hanging out with that cousin and that i would hang out with him everyday and we could go out. But right now he is acting weird and is with his cousin and he is ignoring me and now i have no one to talk to until he stops being with his cousin and that is very very bad that he is ignoring me just because he is with him… i cant anymore i dont know what to do. I am a jealous gf and he is a jealous bf and we are both protective and everything but i feel like everything is going wrong… help please someone…
I have grown up in a Christian community and kind of always been around people who believe Christianity or even catholic. In the past few years I’ve really dove deep into my faith and honestly felt good about myself sometimes but overall terrified and like I’m a horrible person if I do one thing wrong or make a wrong sin. I’m also not sure if I completely believe in all the traditional Christian practices anymore. But I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 5 months and everything is going great. We communicate and he’s so loving and respectful and I honestly don’t have any major issues In the relationship. I used to have a big fear of men starting when I was like 7 aboit my grandpa or my dad trying to rape me (even though they are good men and showed no real signs of it). But it ruined my relationship with them both for awhile til it eventually went away. I always told myself it was because the “spirit” of ocd was rebuked by Jesus but I honestly don’t know. Now I’m dealing with a more extosential or religious ocd where I’m terrified I’m a horrible person for being in a relationship and almost feel worse about myself if I get closer to God. I also feel like if I get too close to God then I have to choose between Him and my bf and I can’t have both. It’s driving me in San and I feel like if I tell anyone any of this they’ll tell me to just break up with my bf even though there isn’t anything wrong in our relationship. Idk what to do and it’s so draining
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Read my Relationship OCD story →i dont say i love you to my bf, only when i say good night out of habit, he pointed it put multiple times. i feel sad bc i cant say it amd i want to say it but i feel bad bc i always think that i dont like him. im so sad. im scared i dont love him and he uses logic in me that sometimes dosent work and then i still think i dont like him and i never did.
Every morning I wake up im always fixating on something and texting chat gpt, whether thats my relationship or my sexuality. I try so hard to resist it but I just can’t handle the uncertainty or the idea of hurting him or leading him on. We aren’t even official because in the past my rocd caused an issue between us where it led to him breaking up with me so now I have a fear of his intentions being ingenuine, especially because friends and family have called him a love bomber, saying he used me for attention, and narcissistic. This takes over me because I feel like I will never be able to be happy with him or trust myself or the relationship because of what other people say. I am very content on my own and single, this is the first relationship where i have experienced debilitating anxiety and doubt about the legitimacy of both of our feelings to the point where I cannot function. I’m trying so hard to not feed into it and not give it energy but I just hate the idea of leading him on or being inauthentic to what I truly want. My current therapist who I only see a couple times a month doesn’t think I have ocd, which makes me spiral and think I should end it with him, especially because I always hear things like “The right relationship will add to your life” and I feel the opposite is happening not directly because of him but because my brain takes over and paralyzes me with indecision about if i should be with him or not. I know that his intentions are genuine, but I hate that everyone is so cynical and assumes they’re not just because my rocd and his emotional baggage created a messy situation. From the moment i met him I convinced myself it was too good to be true and my therapist even said I was self-sabatoging. But i hate not knowing if it is rocd and my insurance doesn’t cover NOCD. He is so patient with me and supportive but I keep hearing things like “the honeymoon stage is supposed to last 3 months” and “it shouldn’t be this hard with the right person” “you’re not good for each other” and my friends tell me i didnt do anything wrong etc bc he did at first say my ocd didnt affect him when in reality that led to him ending it initially. But he has been more upfront with his emotions but then my mom and people will say “more to come” “there’s so much more out there” and its just so isolating not having that support and wondering if im too young to settle and if I’m just an idiot convincing myself I have rocd when really i just don’t want to be with him/it is a toxic relationship. When in reality the only reason it is toxic is because i am so sporadic about whether or not I want him in my life because of my distrust in myself and my decisions. I love him but I know love isn’t always enough and I get existential fixating on what’s “meant to be” and what’s “supposed to happen” its like this debilitating urge to control everything and make everything go perfectly how it is supposed to go. Please help i just want to make the right decision and stop paralyzing myself with doubt
Me and this guy have been talking off and on recently. I’ve known him since middle school and we used to talk in 8th grade and in high school. We used to be in a relationship. It started back in January of 2017 at my classmates 15th birthday party she had that year and him and I danced with each other, and we developed feelings for each other and dating. He put his arm around me too that same year. Then in high school we were together freshman and sophomore year bcuz we texted a lot and had classes. We didn’t talk or were together at all junior year. We both moved on and he got a new gf that year. Then in senior year him and I started talking again. I want to reach out to him to get closure, since things left off confusing. does anyone have any tips on how to go about this? because I still have feelings for him. If this helps him and I are both 22.
Hey I'm new here... Married for two years, not formally diagnosed with OCD but over 25 years, I've dealt with obsessing over my sexuality, then it has shifted to obsessing over my relationships. In my first marriage, I would notice other attractive men and at one point I started to obsess over one man at my church. Eventually it went away but I divorced for other reasons. Fast forward 15 years. I meet my now-husband, but we break up twice while dating. I was terrified. I have learned I do struggle with fearful/avoidant attachment, but I made it through to get married!! But now, the obsessing over other men is happening again. I work with a lot of men. If I notice one who may be handsome, all of a sudden I feel weird sensations in my body, my mind races, and I fear I want to cheat, or wonder if I'd be happier. It has happened with a guy at my church, several coworkers, my husband's best friend...so I know there's a pattern. But as of late, it has gotten worse with one coworker. I have to see him every day. The thoughts are loud. They feel real, like they're how I feel (I like him, he has nice eyes, I love you). I am a Christian, and when I pray about it, it's almost like something inside me says, 'don't fix this, this isn't OCD, I want this guy' blah blah blah. I feel awful, like a whore, like a cheater, like a double-minded person. And I feel so far away from my husband. I've dealt with feeling the need to confess everything early in our relationship. I've gotten better at not doing that, but I feel like I carry this private pain that no one understands. It really hurts. I guess I just needed to vent and let this out. Sometimes it feels so lonely. I feel crazy. I'm in my 50s, I have a full time job, I take care of my home, yet I feel paralyzed by this sometimes. Thanks for reading.
I am so incrediblyand utterly in love with my boyfriend. But I know I'm also bisexual. I've never had a relationship with a woman, or hooked up with one other than making out. My ocd when I stop feeling crazy obsessive love for my bf convinces me its 100% because I'm lesbain. Does anyone else experience this? He's everything to me. But its gets to the point where he’ll kiss me and my brain will go from “I love this so much to I don’t want or like this, within seconds”. I also have BPD.
I feel so bad I overthink abt everything my bf says and does. I think that if he doesn’t say x y z when I want reassurance then he must’ve stopped caring or is tired of me. I know it’s not the truth and he gives me NO reason to think this way. This is my first healthy relationship and I want to be in each others lives forever. I love him so much and I’m trying my hardest to manage these thoughts but I’m so anxious. It’s so draining I feel helpless and like I can’t go a day without checking his social medias. I want us to be the best versions of ourselves for eachother but idk where to start or how to manage this feeling.
Sometimes I catch myself looking at people, specifically men, a little too intently. I feel like I do it to seem prettier or more attractive, but I also think kinda enjoy seeing how they get flustered, I’m not sure. Even though it never goes beyond that, I still feel like I have cheated on my boyfriend, or at the very least, that I am being disrespectful to him. I feel like I’m almost flirting. I don’t know if this is some sort of distortion and or if this is normal. I’m really freaking out to the point where I’m nauseated. Please help. I can’t stop panicking.
My spouse is my best friend. A few months ago I basically worshipped the ground he walked on. He’s the best partner in the world so no “maybe he’s not the right person” commentary. Lately my fear of going psychotic has brought back my intrusive thoughts about harming my husband. Now, whether it be from emotional dissociation or medications, I can’t feel any emotions so I’ve developed ROCD. This is ruining my life and has been a month from hell since my spouse/comfort zone makes me feel nothing. My therapist hasn’t given me any info on how to do anything about this other than reading a book (didn’t help). Any ERP suggestions? I haven’t done ERP before for these types of OCD
Hi I’m 17. My life since I was born has been full of exploring and tons and tons of hobbies. I have adhd. But about 1 year ago is when it kinda started or at least when I started to notice these thoughts and compulsions. I got in a relationship with my girlfriend. And about 2 weeks into that relationship my I started thinking “what if I don’t love her” and I didn’t even know that that’s what ocd was at the time and it ruined with gut wrenching anxiety for months. Then I started titling it as ocd. After we broke up I started to notice that my ocd was starting to flare up a lot. Like when I was snowboarding and normally when I was having the most fun is when I would ask myself things like “what if I hate this” “what if I’m not having fun” then I would try to feel if I was having fun. I would use chat gpt a lot to try and help it but it didn’t really help. I have lots of other ocd thoughts aswell but at the time this one really caused be anxiety and I just felt numb and I became not social. To this day I’m still not as social and I don’t feel like myself anymore. This is the opposite of who I was a year ago. Then I started questioning everything I do and people I love. So it feels like from the moment I wake up my mind just starts spiraling. I can’t seem to find peace or joy in anything anymore and I just feel like my life is going to continue like this and I’ll never be happy. I’ve accepted it at this point. I would love some help. I haven’t really told anyone I know so any tips would be appreciated. I’d be surprised if you even read this far haha. I’m also Christian and love to approach things from a Christian standpoint. I don’t want to sound like a baby who isn’t experiencing real ocd and it’s hard to put into words how much it affects me I just really hope yall understand and can help.
I’m 21M and i believe i’ve had ocd for a lot of my life. I started researching ocd when i was either 16 or 17 because my intrusive thoughts were starting to get really loud and wouldn’t leave me alone. And they are still loud but never louder than before. I never talked to anybody about this until i brought it up to my fiance a month ago because my stress level was at an all time high. I don’t think she really understands because i haven’t went into detail about all my thoughts. Just bits and pieces of it. Anyways, i’ve been stressing about my past intrusive thoughts. I’m concerned on why i wasn’t as stressed as i am today. I was still stressed and had anxiety but i’m guessing i handled it better then. Today though, i’m stressing constantly. Like i never knew this app existed, i never watched videos on this condition or there were different subtypes until now, or i think i didn’t know. I remember back then i would research and research about this and have mental rituals but that was it. Like i wasn’t so stressed back then. Now, i just feel like i’m sick all the time. I’m just scared that my past intrusive thoughts were my true desires. I know they ain’t but how can i tell my brain that? I just wished i would have known more about this back then. I absolutely hate this and i don’t wish this on anybody
I frequently feel the need to test myself with sexual scenarios with a guy jn my class, im jn a relationship and i keep testing if I find him hot attractive or whatever and i have many crisis about it likw i pray to god to not make me attracted to X person, sometimes I avoid going to school i avoid looking at him I skip periods and truly yall idk what to do anymore. Can someone give me suggestions? I'm scared I don't wanna be attracted to anyone else besides my boyfriend i don't wanna cheat on him I don't wanna do anything I just wanna live a quiet happy life with him . I'm worried I know the truth and just don't wanna accept it jm super worried I need suggestions pls
i’m a new user on this app, I downloaded it just cause I was curious, I don’t really know if I have OCD. Because in school all I learned about OCD is things being out of place and having it to be perfect almost like perfectionism, but I’ve just recently realized there’s a whole kind of different types of OCD, some things I struggle with daily is a fear of bad things happening or almost like an impending doom of when is it gonna happen? I’m always in my head thinking feels like I’m having multiple conversations at once. Sometimes it doesn’t even feel like I’m having a conversation with myself. I have horrendous anxiety about everything and anything talking to people being around people. It just feels like it consumes my everyday life and I don’t know what to do. I can’t clearly remember anything from my childhood and some things I feel like I may be imagining I just don’t really feel like a person. I’m always thinking the worst in my relationship over analyzing and stressing out thinking of scenarios or thinking, my boyfriend‘s cheating on me. It almost all feels out of my control.
So I have cheated on tests and exams before, and I just now have started feeling guilty about it because of my OCD flare ups among everything else in my life. I also have really bad relationship ocd that I may cheat or may have cheated in the past (I didn’t) and so having these thoughts that I cheat in school makes me feel like a really bad person. I didn’t feel bad about it until now, because I know that it’s wrong. I still can’t shake the feeling of guilt and I feel like I should confess to my professors.
I had a really bad episode 2 months ago. Started therapy and meds and have been getting better. then this past weekend I was slammed with a completely new set of intrusive thoughts about my mother's mortality. She is alive and well and I see her often but yet I can't shake the idea of her death and how my life will never be the same and eternally broken when she dies. This feels unique because so much of my past OCD are things that either can't happen or are unlikely. But this is certain. We all die. And I have no idea how to start to deal with this.
my ocd has been all over the place the past few days and it’s really exhausting. it’s convincing me i’m lesbian, im racist, i don’t like my bf, or im dying of 5 different diseases. im so tired. i’ve been more physical and keeping myself busy so im not sure why its acting up. within the past hour my ocd told me that i secretly like girls and i cant date my bf and that im racist bc i didn’t think a guy who is a poc was attractive. i feel like a horrible person and i feel like it won’t stop.
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