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Worse thing about ROCD is the guilt in knowing your partner deserves so much better than someone constantly in doubt about things. That's the real torture for me.

This year I started dating someone. After a few months I started to notice many things that I thought werent compatible. It was difficult but ROCD definitely played a big part. I started getting really jealous but at the same time I couldnt bring myself to commit with her. Eventually I kept bouncing between being with her or not being with her that I just broke up the relationship. It took many months to get over her because I blamed myself for the ROCD. Since then, I have met many girls that are great yet I fear even starting due to what happened last time I tried to push myself into a relationship. Its quite depressing to have given up on love.

I can’t do this. Everything feels so dark. It’s hurts so much…I wish I could go back. I would change everything in a heartbeat knowing what I now know 😭💔🙏🏻 God save me from this. I can’t hold on much longer

TW* im in panic mode I just googled about tocd out of little desparation and boredom and somehow ended up reading loads of comments and this one post from a guy who transitioned into a girl, that post triggered me really bad, and i was able to relate to some things there. I have alot of anxiety right now and my body feels very hot, ears, feet, Its hard to focus man. Wtf do I do? I feel like im losing myself( not sure if I actually am) falling in a hole, away from everyone, my family, myself, sinking deeper in depression. Im scared guys, is this really happening? All the proof about my gender being wrong is coming up. I cant take it anymore, its 3 am right now, Im scared shitless and panicking really bad

I know I shouldn’t avoid doing things, but lately I don’t have the energy to do any religious activity. I avoid praying, reading religious articles or the Bible. If I pray, I start to have doubts “does God exist? Do you truly believe? Aren’t you an atheist?” or some sentences “God isn’t real; You’re a fool for believing; You shouldn’t be praying if you’re thinking this or that.” I miss doing these things, but I’m just afraid to start all the thoughts again. I know I’m hiding.

Sebastian’s upbringing was shaped by mental health challenges in his family, and he felt like he had to bear every difficulty without showing his anxiety and depression. He was taught that this was something to feel proud of. One day Sebastian accompanied his mother to therapy and finally realized what he had been missing. When the same challenges affected his academics in college, he made up his mind: being “tough” felt good, but being free from his anxiety and depression felt better. Committed to becoming a counselor, Sebastian turned his academic career around. Now, as a NOCD therapist, he specializes in treating OCD and helps others conquer their own shame and stigma. Read more about the journey that led Sebastian from resisting therapy for years to becoming a source of hope and support for others.

I’m afraid of eggs. I can’t have a carton of eggs in the fridge. I haven’t ordered them at a restaurant in over two years. My son has an egg allergy, and whenever we are around eggs, my brain sends me these images or flashes of him somehow getting a piece of the eggs. Then I see him gasping for air, and it literally creates a pit in my stomach because I love him more than I love to breathe. I would never hurt him. Yes, eggs allergies are important, and restaurants should be mandated to have allergy menus available for customers upon request. However, this has more to do with my issues than anything my son cannot eat. I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder or OCD. Most people hear this about me and probably think I’m a clean freak, but that’s only one type of OCD and a generalization stemming from poor media coverage about this mental illness. Unfortunately, organization and cleanliness are only one color in the rainbow of OCD subtypes that a person can suffer from. Most experts agree that OCD people experience intrusive thoughts just like we all do; the difference is OCD sufferers have a tremendous amount of anxiety due to these thoughts. Some people see these as images or flashes that can be disturbing or prey on what we care about the most. The anxiety we feel, as a result, is met with another option. Perform a mental or physical compulsion designed to give you temporary relief but will only return wanting more of your time and presence the next go-round. Some OCD sufferers experience this constantly. If I tell you not to think of the pink elephant, you will understand the challenging nature of treating this silent killer. I say silent because many people begin having these experiences and feel an increased and overinflated sense of responsibility based on their thoughts or compulsions become un-ending demanding more of their unlucky victim who believes by performing compulsions they are proving relief to themselves. Then they do this over and over again. Remember the O in OCD? It stands for obsessive, which can create concrete-like neural pathways in the person’s mind. If they suffer silently for years or even decades, the results can damage the person with OCD and their relationships to all forms of life. The good news is through something called Exposure Response Therapy or ERP, which is considered the gold standard for OCD treatment, people can see fundamental differences made in their obsessions and their compulsions. While no “cure” currently exists, many OCD sufferers know their symptoms worsen if they don’t care for themselves by sleeping or eating regularly. The bad news in this situation is that Mississippi has incredibly limited resources when it comes to this. I would know. I’m from a suburb outside the Capitol where the Governor lives, and I felt hopelessly trapped by our fragmented health systems and lack of available resources. I’m lucky to have a wife that encouraged me to seek help, and I believe she saved my life. Through therapy, medication, meditation, and a lot of help from my loved ones, I’m recovering from OCD symptoms, and now I want to help others find their way out. Our children deserve better when it comes to the early identification of this disease. We should create partnerships to ensure teachers, counselors, and parents have the knowledge to talk with their kids about OCD. Early prevention could help one less child stay up at night performing compulsions until they pass out and then underperforming at school due to lack of sleep. We have to do better. I bought a carton of eggs, and they’re sitting in my fridge right now. I’ll let you know how my next omelet is.

OCD mixed with truth? How do you handle that? I’ve been obsessing over a theme that I thought was crazy for the past few weeks. I thought I was just being overly anxious/paranoid. Then I find out last night that there IS a some truth to what I feared. I’ve been sick to my stomach all day and on my phone all day trying to research and rationalize and justify the situation. I can’t stop thinking about it and it’s been almost 10 hours. I feel like I’m in a whirlpool, just swirling around and around. Everything I try to search makes me feel worse and worse. I can’t accept that this really happened because it scares me too much. I can’t let it go because it’s not just anxiety anymore- it’s TRUE (well, sort of true). I even called my boyfriend and he explained everything to me and explained the situation but I still can’t let it go. How can we cope when our anxieties actually come true? What then?

Can someone explain what OCD and the "ick" is?

Im a little sad. When my ocd was really bad and i was wasting away pushing people away and all that my parents and i had numerous fights to the point that my didnt wouldn’t get me anything for my birthday. He was upset that i was taking a brak from school and sleeping all day. Now im back to school and i finished my first semester with all A’s and one B (which was due to attendance) and he was like tell me what do you want for your birthday? I feel like i needed that love then when i was struggling more than now…. And its nice that he asks but i know he will only get me something that he thinks is ok. Example he doesn’t support me gaming for stress relief so he didn’t help me purchase any of the things i asked even though he said he would. I feel like i sound spoiled but i just wish that his support was unconditional and hed trust me.

Hey friends, I need your help. I have the same thought in my head for at least 3 months now. Logically I don’t even think it’s a big deal. And I don’t think I am intentionally checking or ruminating. But the same thought is still there. I really don’t think I’m doing any compulsions. I’m not asking for reassurance, nothing. I’m on 200mg Zoloft and am seeing a psychiatrist again in 2 weeks to see if we can make changes. Does anyone have any advice?

big tw for this . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . i was watching my brother and he jumped on my lap and put his hand in between my legs because he didn’t know any better and i thought of this as a erp exercise ( plus he wasn’t doing anything ) so i didn’t move him instantly at first but then he started to moving his hand and i got a intrusive thought that i should move too to possibly get a groinal and i didn’t act on it but at the same time i feel like i almost did, not because i wanted to do anything with my brother but to do it just because + i knew something happening wasn’t a 100% possibility but it was still a big one nonetheless. i told my mom about this and she said i didn’t do anything but i wanted to get you guys opinions too i feel so weird something could of easily went wrong and it’s scaring me

Can someone please help with the post I made an hour ago? I’m scared I keep cringing like I’m forcing myself to but I know I like males not females not theirs I keep I almost smile calling them but they’re not hot or delicious I don’t like female body parts so why would I smile I want male body parts why do I feel why do I cringe why do I feel forced I want men not women and I said almost with a smile not sweet but women are not sweet hotter delicious to me and I sound I sound how I sound I know it I said I don’t I do want then I said I’m not and I made a face like accompanying that as well I really think that but I do like men I’m scared I’m forcing it and I can’t stop making a face but I do like male body parts why would I make a face saying I said I don’t I really don’t like females why am I smiling I don’t like females I can’t breathe it’s like whatever body part is used to swallow is too swollen I can hardly breathe I feel like my mouth in my throat or somehow like swelling up. I keep saying I don’t like females not sweet as I mean otherwise but I want male body parts and I cringe like I don’t but I want men females are not sweet or sexy to me and I am really freaking out and confused

Can any SO-OCS sufferers help me with the post I made 4-5 mins ago. I really need help

Is avoidance a compulsion?

Can feelings go away after a really big disappointment?? It's like I don't know my bf anymore, it's like if it is a stranger. I became indifferent, reluctant and anxious at the idea of seeing him. My coping strategies is to take distances when I'm hurt... he did a thing that really disappointed me and made me feel so unspecial, I felt really really hurted. I couldn't stop crying for a day. (He didn't cheat, and no violence). And from that thing, my feelings change. I have rocd, and in past they changed a lot. But in the way that happend that day... never! We talked, he tried to find compromise, and wanted to change things. Now he is trying, but it feels like it is too late! Can my feelings came back, or do I have to broke up with him??

Does anybody else have experience with obessional thinking about other people? I have begun to compare myself to others very negatively, to particular people in my life. It has grown over months to the point that simple words, colours, smells can trigger a thought about a person, past relationships and then following thoughts about my own self worth, lack of control over things and my general anxiety and distress. I am not really looking for reassurance. I just wanted to know if anybody else experiences this and how exposure therapy could work in relation to people and relationships.

Is it true that OCD latches onto thing you value most? My themes are: pure OCD, POCD, and real event. If those are my themes, what does that mean about what I value?

It feels so real. And then some days I feel like I can really differentiate between me and ocd and see it all clearly. And be okay with uncertainty. And then it just hits me back again like a brick where my brain is like “no it’s all or nothing you can’t have anything in between” and then I get anxious. And when I’m anxious I get irritable with my partner and it’s almost like I resent her for not letting me HOCD thoughts be played out. Like surely that means I’m just in denial about it.

This is killing me now i am lost I don't know if this is ocd anymore or just major denial cause i think i am just getting major proofs of that pls help me. Okay so i went out today and a few things or thoughts bothered me or didn't idk it was my friends birthday and she just kissed her bf and my other female friend was sitting next to me and the thought of kissing her just popped up?!! Like what?! And it felt to real like i wanted it and the lighting was also such and stuff just which i just found weird and then this girl was pretty and attractive and I thought that she was the same but i don't know in what sense now and if I don't know it could mean that it could be the one that i fear too this uncertainty now feels like it could lead me to my denial being true which is not true or is it!?!? Is it is and i am writing this so casually and okay with it what is that then. Then this guy was being creepy and trying to be like too close to me and the thought of saying i have a girlfriend popped into my head like right away without much thought.. why would that come if I don't think thats true or has some truth to it cause it was so like reflexive and if it is that what does that mean?!? Do i know the answer but don't wanna believe it or am i faking having od and this isn't that and am i asking these questions cause i want it to be ocd cause i think i wont have a problem kissing the same sex and what does this statement of mine mean people with soocd say they hate the thought or they would never why did i say the other though what does that say about me?!? Why does being with guys give me anxiety is its not something i want and why does being withe the same sex feel more like a possibility and real that the opposite its like i am telling people i am into the same sex feel more like a possibility and real that the opposite its like i am telling people i am into the same sex am i?!? What am I supposed to do how is this ocd how can this be anyone hearing will say its just me in major major denial... being with a guy feels like I don't want it whyyy what do i do?!? And sometimes i notice good looking guys and girls too and do i get the same feeling when i see them or is that ocd too?!? Like What do i do?!