- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Does anyone feel guilty really easily, like you’re being a bad friend if you’re not 1,000% honest with them all the time? Is this a specific type of OCD?
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Does anyone feel guilty really easily, like you’re being a bad friend if you’re not 1,000% honest with them all the time? Is this a specific type of OCD?
I am so depressed bc it’s like I discovered my truth. I still obsess but there is one huge problem in my relationship that needs to get fixed that my partner and I have talked about and even argued about. I don’t feel financially secure in my relationship. He does help me and I am not saying he doesn’t but he only can when he has enough in his bank account. I honestly have spending issues I need to work on. But right now I have calmed down on spending things. But we are still struggling. His job doesn’t pay much and he doesn’t get enough hours. He’s worked there for 6 years now and due to the world getting bad. His job is suffering from it with losing hours and not being able to give more out. It’s been bothering me a lot. I told him I don’t feel financially secure. I know he will help me but he doesn’t make enough to do more and that has been making me unhappy. With all the arguments and talking about it with no change I am depressed badly. I don’t want our relationship to end bc I know I still love him but how can I motivate him and get him to understand the correct way that he needs to leave. That place isn’t physically safe for him anyways. He knows I hate him working there and that I am losing patience. He’s been depressed badly too. But I need him to leave.. my best friends husband use to work there and she always hoped he got fired so he had no choice but to leave. He did and is doing way better now. But my patience is growing thin with this. I don’t wanna force him to do something he doesn’t wanna do but I can’t stand him wanting to stay there and not wanna find something better… that is the biggest issue besides our mental health that we have other than that everything else is good. I just wanna know a way to motivate him without threatening him that if he doesn’t change I will leave. I don’t want 12 years to go down the drain for this but I am running out of options… 😢😢😭😭
Does anyone else feel like as an adult your OCD is bad but now that you know what it is, you had it as a kid too? Looking back, I think my always being in fear as a child was just OCD. I constantly thought I was going to die or that I was sick, etc. I think I didn’t realize it was OCD until my 20’s. How about y’all?
Does anyone have tips for a beginner to exercising and eating better when you’re depressed.. when I wake up I just wanna lay in bed and it’s like all I crave is junk/sugary foods.. idk how to get out of this and it’s so frustrating.. I want better for myself but it’s like my mind is like “nope..”Any advice at all is appreciated
Please comment from or advise me from personal experience if you’re currently seeing a therapist and undergoing ERP to treat existential thought OCD. I don’t understand how ERP could work on thoughts like ‘what if my own family or kids aren’t real’ I know with contamination ocd they expose you to your fears by making touch objects or things and with harm ocd they might get you to hold a knife but low does the same principle apply to Existential thought OCD? I’ve been on the ocdf website and couldn’t get any answers …. Please comment
Theres been a recent situation thats been eating at my mind, it was 3 days ago i got a really nasty and worrying intrusive thought and at the time i couldnt help withdrawing and ruminating over it. But suddenly i cant stop thinking about it and its making things so hard because i dont want to. But then i start to question why i keep thinking about it and why it wont leave my head. I cant eat or focus on anything else im so scared right now. How do i let it pass, how can i let this kind of thought go or not pass judgement on it. It seems so impossible
How could i do erp if i have lot of new intrusive thoughts daily..
This one is the hardest for me. All I do is obsess about “do I want a kid do or do I not want a kid” every single day. I worry constantly about if it’s selfish to bring someone here. I convince myself I’ll just have terrible PP, hurt my child, get it taken away from me, or not be a good mom, etc. Having harm ocd makes it difficult because I think about who am I to think I deserve to be a mom when I suffer with this. I’m at the age where everyone is doing it right now and it will be a decision I make in the next 5 years. Everything about pregnancy triggers my harm ocd. From top to bottom. Yet around kids, I’ve been told I am great with them by everyone and deep down I think I do want a child. Does OCD just attack the things you want/love most sometimes? It legit is making me miserable. I wish I could just let go and let it happen if it’s meant to happen like everyone else does around me. I feel so alone about this one and I feel like it’s ruining my life!!! 😭
I have hocd hopefully and also some tocd thoughts but its not that bad. I am obsseded about my body hair "do i have too much body hair for a woman?", broad shoulders " They have to mean something?", I really hate them but everyone on my family has broad shoulders. I have checked all my bodyparts and i check them over and over again. Like do i have manly face and everything. I want to go test my testosterone levels so badly but i dont if its reasurence. I feel like verything proofs something and it is making me crazyy. How can i just accept that fact that my bodyparts and my looks doesnt make me gay or trans.
Hi, everyone. I hope you are well. I’m asking for advice in regards to intrusive thoughts. I have struggled with them for most of my life, but they’ve gotten worse in my 20s. I went to England in mid-May and I was so excited because that’s where I’m from and I was excited to see my family and my homeland. Well, we flew into London Heathrow airport and stayed a few days in London. Long story short, we went to the gift shop for the Tower of London and that triggered horrible intrusive thoughts about mediaeval torture. I have always refused to go into the building itself or the museum (even though I love history and museums) purely because I’m an extremely empathetic person and I pick up on energy surrounding people and places. Horrible things happened in the Tower of London and I struggle with that part of my country’s history. I thought I’d be okay just going to the gift shop with my family, but these thoughts have been hurting me for almost a month now. I don’t know what to do to put myself at ease and help myself feel safe. These thoughts are so disturbing and painful, and I feel humiliated because I’m having them. I feel like a disgusting person and I am too afraid to tell anyone I’m having them. Does anyone have any ideas or suggestions on how to help myself feel better? I would appreciate it more than I can explain. Thank you in advance.
i finally got a laptop so i can do online sessions and be able to look stuff up better nocd doesnt accept my insurance and im on ssi and get 560 a month and cant afford therapy im hopeing theyll accept my insurnace soon ive been looking for online docotrs that can prescribe me medications and help me find other ocd therapists to help me theres alot of mental health olaces round me but none that realy understand ocd they dont realy have time to tlk to you and i feel like they dont have the ability to prescribe medications properly if there not able to tlk to you and only prescribeing 1 antidepressant isnt gonna help as much as prescribeing a few for all your symptoms i struggle at nite i wake up alot cause i have anixety cause i dont want to get off my phone and stop watching tv i have alot of anxiety i have ocd and depression i was on medications wit no therapy cause i had no idea there was therapy for ocd and i was doing well for awhile then my ocd got triggered and i just was laying in the bed all day i was staying up late and still do i gained alot of weight which wouldnt matter to me if i was better but i wasnt so i was bigger for no reason i tried admitting myself into the mental hospital but they didnt understand ocd i keep my clothes in bags i wash my hands prior ot touching them and getting them out to do my dressing ritual everyday i chnage my cothes i lay my clothes out a certain way put them on a certain way i get out my deodorant and qtip and wash my hands everytime i touch something and i ou tmy hair up in a bun and use face pads on my face its all done a certain way like order and symmetry i wash my hand sget my clothes out i undress a certain then pu tmy clothes on a certain way then deodorant clean my ears then wash my hands then ahir up then face pads then wash hands again when i went to the hsopital they went threw all of my clothes i was crying telling them i cant have ppl touching them they dont allow qtips so my dressing ritual was being messed up i was gonna have a roommate and share a abthroom so id have to do my dressing ritual on the floor of the bathroom and take up the bathroom i cant wash my own hair cause it takes to long the process is just aggravateing its hard for me to shower and shave and pluck my eyebrows ive not worn makeup in along time and not straightned my hair its all hard i went to the hospital to get help but they couldnt accomodate my ocd and me being different and not being able to help wat i do witout getting help for it the doctor there told me they didnt have the resources to help me and refered me to a place in chicago for ocd but when i got home and did the over the phone call appointment they denied me cause my insurance can only be used in my state but there is no inpatient ocd place in my state theres 1 outpatient a few hours away but they dont take my insurance and i dont think i could make the drive im up late im tired i can barely take care of myself and get ready i live in tennessee i was told i could move to the state were theres an inpatient facility but i cant do that rite now i just want to find a doctor thatll listen prescribe me some medications so i can start to feel better anf maybe be able to drive to therapy if i can even find somewere thatll accept my insurance i have tenncare theres also a place in canada that accepts usa insurance as long as your insurnace will cover it they have like a year long program and online stuff the only thing that sucks is im on suboxene i started useing drugs when i got discharged from the hsopital that reffered me to that place in chicago and denied me and was on drugs for a few years on and off doing suboxene and alot of places wont allow you to be on drugs and be on suboxene.
I broke up with my partner yesterday and feel heartbroken. It’s amazing how much unconditional love and care I feel now in comparison to feelings that I had having Rocd. I’ve been struggling with Rocd for the past two years, doubting whether I prefer someone who have traits that I value most in myself. However, I feel like all those thoughts I was having about us not being compatible completely went out the window. Whats revealed is my love for him and desire to be with him that was there all along. I realize how bullshit my thoughts were. I think I know that I want to try again with him, even with the knowledge that it still might not work out. I regret doing so relatively quickly and without warning. I really hope he feels the same to try again and that he has similar thoughts. I don’t think I ever really wanted to break up with him. It was completely mind-made. I was happy with him. I’m so miserable and want to be with him. I miss him so much.
Alright so I had very severe childhood OCD that was significantly helped with medication in my teens. I’ve since tapered off the meds and was doing ok for a while. I’m now in my early 20s and have had two episodes of severe anxiety and some depression coming back but I’ve managed it with therapy and other methods. I unfortunately entered another episode of this and noticed some OCD tendencies returning, fearing that I would snap and commit suicide, fears about going insane followed by mental compulsions. It’s important to mention that I have an amazing partner right now that I love so incredibly much who is so supportive I’m not used to it. I started to get fears that I was attracted to other people (when I didn’t actually want to be with the other people) and would obsess over it and feel intense guilt. Then things got worse. I went home at the beginning of the summer and had a sexually intrusive thought about my sister. It was so incredibly disturbing but I immediately latched onto it and took responsibility and for the last few weeks have been stuck in this horrible spiral of fear that I might be attracted to my sister. I hate it and it disgusts me. But my sister is gorgeous, so I keep thinking because I notice this I’m a freak and want to be with her even though I have no desire to do that. It makes me feel so so sick and horrible but I can’t get rid of that “what if” and worry that I’m using OCD as an excuse to hid my “true feelings”. I’m shattered. I’ve never felt so guilty in my life. I have so much hatred for myself. I feel like I don’t deserve my family and their support and I definitely don’t feel like I deserve my partner who continues to hold me while I cry and stick by me despite the fact that I’m an emotional mess and have such sick thoughts. I don’t know how to accept the doubt in this situation because it feels so horrifying and wrong and it makes me feel like a terrible person. If I accept it what if it comes true and I develop those feelings? I would never be able to accept myself or forgive that. I was so happy with my family and partner until this happened, now I feel like I’ve destroyed everything good in my life and don’t deserve any of it. Im trying to be self compassionate but obviously I can’t get past the guilt. Why would I be thinking about it this much if it was 100% not true? I don’t know how to fix this. Thanks if you read all this, sorry it’s so long.
What can intrusive thoughts be about? I’m fearing right now that I’m becoming delusional with a thought that popped into my head and now I’ve gone down the rabbit hole and it’s creating so much anxiety. I’m afraid that I believe it or will start to believe it. It’s causing me so much distress.
Living with toxic parents check. Rather than checking in on me and asking if I’m okay with mental health. They wanna say I’m lazy for not coming out room and claiming I want nothing to do with them because i don’t come out a lot as if I don’t deal with the shit I deal with on daily basis . Dad threatened he’ll take my door away . I’m almost 20 btw 🥺yup and still get treated this way. Because I left my recent job and came back to old one dad had gotten wrong idea I only wanna be working fast food rest life . WTFFFF I’ve had talks wit them many times . I want to go to college and not for their sake but for my own because I WANT TO! Why tf can’t they notice realize all hard work I’ve put into these past couple years especially having to deal with all these factors affecting mental health. They have no idea with what I battle with everyday. I hate them . After he had invited me to go out I had agreed to it but now he wants to act this way on me and treat me like this as if I did anything ....NO I’m done . No happy Father’s Day to him . I’m done with him . I am genuinely done.
My niece was having an attitude with me and I told her to stop having an attitude my mom defended her and snapped at me when my niece was in the wrong (she’s 11 and has a horrible attitude with me all the time) and I tried to defend myself and my mom threatened to pull over and slap me in my face and I said whatever to show I wasn’t afraid and then she said it again that she would slap me dead in the face and it’s not the only time she’s threatened me like that. She’s threatened to hit me many times before growing up. She also treats me like I’m nothing and shows no care for me whatsoever and makes me feel unloved and like a burden when it comes to my niece she’s perfect and gets whatever she wants and validation. I get threatened and yelled at. I’m 23 but I’m on vacation with them and I can’t escape. I’m now crying in the car trying to be quiet. I just really need help. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do. I feel like giving up because why should I even be here if my mom doesn’t care about me or love me. I don’t even know if this would even be considered abuse or not 💔
My wife thinks that I don’t trust her. She knows that I’ve dealt with OCD for several years but I guess it’s because I don’t normally share the details of what my mind is obsessing over that she thinks I don’t trust her, but I do tell her when I’m having a bad day. Although I do have trouble trusting people with information because of my upbringing, I told her that with OCD it’s that I can’t trust my own mind. I’ve had obsessions in the past over events that seemed so critical at the time that I now realize meant nothing and I remember during those times wanting to confess to people so badly for reassurance and then when I did it didn’t help anything. I’ve tried explaining to her how this disease tricks your brain but I’m not sure that she understands it. Please don’t take this as me talking down about my wife because she is awesome. I’m really just wondering if I should be more open or if maybe I should try to help her understand OCD better?
i just need to ramble i’m a 19 year old amateur self-taught digital artist with major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety, and of course, obsessive compulsive disorder. i see art as my passion, my only talent and purpose. i want to use that art to inspire, bring happiness and create something new for people to enjoy but i’ve always been so negative and panicky about my art, i know logically negativity isn’t going to help, but i think you’ll all agree ocd sucks. I have wanted to start doing art commissions for people since i was 15, and it took four years until i recently got the courage to get myself together and figure out how to be an adult. this year i recently opened commissions and this is rare of me to say but i’m kinda proud to say i’ve made 140$ :) despite this success my brain likes to continue to punch me, usually bringing me down to a place where i once again feel worthless, incapable and terrified. I’ve tried my best to manage myself despite all the “kill yourself”stuff my head wouldn’t stop yelling about. today i got another commission. i was happy and i was friends with that person, but they are so much more talented and creative than i am myself, and so now i feel panic. the conversation was totally fine too, we were just friends talking, and they gave me a totally manageable and a a well explained request and i agreed, but i’m terrified. i don’t want to disappoint them, take too long, make a mistake, embarrass myself somehow (i always find a way), or give them something that looks like crap. I guess my thought process is i really don’t believe my stuff is worth money. “it’s a disgusting absolute disappointment why are you wasting your life” says the brain chatter. I guess i just gotta go with it. just try to wait out the anxiety that will consume me for the next couple days. it’s total agony though, my ocd rots me from the inside. keeps telling me to just kill myself (everything stirs the pot) do these moments of pain ever truly go away? or do we live the rest of our lives getting better, then getting worse, then getting better ocd is telling me to apologize for wasting the time of people reading this. so um yeah, i’m sorry.
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