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How do you deal with the false attraction thing? How can we reduce it??

I do not want to intrude or make anyone feel inferior but i would like to add that this app is exactly what is feeding into your ocd cycle. It is not helping and it might lead to a relapse. I have a family member with HOCD it is debilitating to both her and me because of the cycle. This app feeds into that cycle. If you don’t agree with me, that’s okay but that’s my take on this. I would like for yourselves to ask yourselves how many times do you visit this app? Do you delete it then redownload it then delete it again? How many times has this app made you feel like your ocd was not ocd and was reality? How many times has this app tried to convince that you are not in control of your thoughts? You are in control. This is an issue from within which deals with self confidence and trust. Trust yourselves in that youre not your thoughts and you have control over them. If you want to be someone, be that person, don’t let your thoughts decide for you. Work on your self confidence. You are not your ocd. Sorry if this seems too upfront, I tried being as nice as possible and I do know that this is debilitating for the person with ocd. I really do hope you get better but please don’t give up and try your best to get rid of your absolutist and pessimistic thinking. I know some people on here won’t agree with me but this is from my experience.

My friend commented on how she doesn't like a musician I like because she saw a controversial tik tok about him once or something. I kinda panicked because I have OCD themes surrounding cancel culture/morality. I pointed out that she was a Taylor swift fan and that Taylor has a lot of controversies. It wasn't a big deal and we both kinda laughed it off. I ended up compulsively searching trying to find the tik tok she talked about. I couldn't find anything. I went to my other friend and vented about how it made me anxious and how I didn't appreciate being told that by a Taylor fan since she's controversial too. I specified that I love my friend to death and that I don't judge her for being a Taylor fan, it's just music and it's not that deep. I didnt insult my friend or anything. But that I don't want Taylor fans judging me for liking anything 'controversial' because it feels hypocritical and i said it in kind of a passive aggresive way. Now I feel guilty. I dont like shit talking or talking about people behind their back. I was just frustrated and i think i did it compulsively too to reassurance seek. I didn't even specify her name or who she was, I just said 'a friend of mine'. But now I'm feeling like I worded things a bit mean spirited and it wasn't that serious in the first place. Plus I was talking to my friend about Taylor's controversies and my frustrations with her as an artist and I feel bad for bad talking a musician my friend likes. Am I a fake friend? I feel really guilty and like I need to confess to my friend. I'm serious when I say I don't judge her or care that she's a Taylor swift fan I think I just got frustrated and anxiety got the best of me.

Hi guys need some advice, I’ve been having some relationship problems where my partner is in med school and works 12 hours a day mostly. It’s hard to spend alot of time together, but we try to see each other once a week and it’s been kind of hard on me because my love language is quality time and I love to spend time with him but I only saw him for 2 hours last week and it’s been a bit on more on the hard end for me. I understand he works and I’ve been trying to be understanding and I told him to come stay a night with me after his work but he says he’s so drained and that he likes to go home so he can just fully relax. I feel hurt that he can’t even spend a night with me where I can cook for him, and give him cuddles so he relax but when I addressed that he says I’m complaining about him and that I’m not understanding of his situation and how tired he feels because of work. I feel hurt and I’m taking it personal and I don’t know we see each other once a week maybe for a few hours but I want more time with him but med school has been so hard for him and for our relationship. He tells me right now I’m not being appreciative of him really trying to put in effort in us seeing each other even after his work but I don’t know I feel hurt that he doesn’t want to spend a night with me but rather go home and lay on his couch with his fam there. I did mention that if he’s so tired why does he sit with his fam then instead of coming to spend time with me and spend a night but he gets mad that I say that so any advice would be helpful please because I want to know if I’m in the wrong and if I need to work on myself :(

I’ve been using this forum a bit, lots for reassurance sadly. But I’m also quite stuck and need help. At 25, I had a thought pop into my head that I felt nothing for my then gf. Literally overnight it became an obsession. I could feel nothing but anxiety, fear and confusion. After several months of obsessing, googling, replaying, searching for ‘why’, another thought popped in. You are gay. It’s been 10 years now and outside of a brief 1.5 year break, has stuck. I also have emotional numbness or depression or both I think? Literally from the moment of my first obsession, it’s like I lost the ability for joy, happiness, or the drive for life. Libido went to zero, and it was like I became a different person overnight. Obviously the lack of any of these things just reinforce the themes of my ocd. I need someone to reassure me that I’m doing the right things to help me overcome and reclaim my life back. I need to: - take the plunge and trust my psychologist that ERP is needed for recovery. - I need to understand OCD is a condition, it’s not something that I have done on purpose. - I need to accept the thoughts and feelings are happening, but outside of acknowledging them, let them be. - I need to force myself to be social once again, even if I don’t feel positive about it. - I need to exercise. I’m 36 now. I have a son on the way. I love my beautiful wife, despite having very little emotions. I just want my life back. Am I going about this the right way?

I feel like a child. I can’t make decisions, I truly can’t judge “right” from “wrong” because my definition of right is so strict and everyone else seems to be comfortable with shades of gray. How can I ever know? There seems to be a certain tolerance for “breaking rules” that the average person understands but I simply don’t follow. It’s all unacceptable to me. I struggle a lot with moral scrupulosity (not religious). It makes me feel like I don’t know how to operate in this world, like it’s not made for people like me. I feel lost like a child, and I’ll always be behind my peers because I just can’t function like they do. And I feel so guilty for my indecision; what if I should be taking some action, standing up for what’s right? I just freeze because I don’t ever know what to do. I don’t know where to go. I’m tired and embarrassed to not know these things. One time I even went to the police station to ask if I was guilty. It’s difficult to explain and ask.. I feel like a helpless child, but I’m supposed to be the adult. I’d rather overreact than under react.. but I just don’t know. Am I standing in the way of recovery? But what if I become so morally loose in the name of fighting OCD.. I’m so tired.

Harm ocd is the worst possible thing I’ve ever experienced. It’s legit about my girlfriend and family whom I love so much. This all came about after a crime case and it latched onto it and I can’t seem to let go. Anyone have any tips on helping with harm ocd?

I have been on therapy twice a week for a month now. I am apparently a hard case to think up exposures for. I have done 2 and they seemed so pointless. I need some encouragement bad but I'm not suppose to get reassurance from anyone. It's a very tough situation. My family needs me back so bad. My children, and wife are watching me suffer. It's been a year and I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. I have been diagnosed with OCD for as long as I can remember, but it's all thoughts. Thoughts of never getting over this extreme anxiety and depression. So I never see stories that I can relate to when it comes to OCD.

I feel like I then did so much reassurance seeking on the internet and on here for the past month that I don’t even care to look anymore i see a lot of good stuff but the small amount of bad stuff my brain an heart goes with some reason I feel helpless is like I feel normal but i feel confused and odd for some reason like I’m not in control of my thought and feelings and sensories for some reason does anyone else feel like this or felt like this in the past and does it get better?have an meds and therapy took these problems away?

from when you first had intrusive thoughts, did you ever think of a demon got inside of you or something? sounds crazy. But, when I had my first intrusive thought.. I immediately thought some sort of evil got to me. Or if someone did a curse on me before… idk. It’s til this day that I sort of feel like that. Because OCD is scary, but super crazy that such disorder is that way. I mean.. it’s a crazy disorder, I hate it. But anyways, you too or just me?

Anyone else super into the metaphysical? Like, YouTube astrology videos and tarot readings? I keep watching stuff about the "age of Aquarius" that we are entering, and how it's going to cause some "identity shifts" in individuals. I've been spiraling out of control everytime I hear this phrase being used. I automatically think it means my sexual identity is changing/going to change/already did?! To top it all off, I keep getting LGBT content recommended to me on all social media platforms. It feels like the universe is trying to send me signs that I'm actually a Lesbian and not a woman who loved men?! I can't take it anymore. I can't even be around my bf or say "I love you" without overthinking that! ? We are about to celebrate our 3 years anniversary together and I STILL am dealing with this stupid theme!!!???

I constantly get a strong urge to take revenge on some people who hurt me, and when I try to suppress this urge I get thoughts telling me that I’m weak and have no dignity and I must take revenge or else Could this be OCD ?

A month ago my boyfriend and his parents planned a trip to go down to SoCal for the moms bday and to see some family and they invited me to go too! ( my bf lives in NorCal so we are long distance) I was very excited but 2 days before the trip my bf was going thru some things and basically broke up with me. Ofc later that night he regretted his decision and wanted to talk but I told him I would only talk in person. When his parents heard the news his mom told him not to go bc he’d be too sad. But he’s 19 and we really needed to talk things thru! His dad let him go and he spent that Thursday with them and he picked me up on Friday! We talked and everything was okay and he apologized! It was his moms bday and she wanted to hang out at the pool in the hotel! I was feeling super anxious so I was having anxiety so I told my bf to go with his mom bc it’s her bday and she probably wants to spend time with him. He went and I sucked it up and came down an hour later! We stayed at the pool for an hour and then I had to leave bc of my anxiety but also no one knew and his cousins followed us up 20 min later bc they were done with the pool! ( also the pools were separated by adults and kids so certain pools you couldn’t go in bc you had to 21 and over! So we couldn’t really hang out with his mom). We bought her some snacks and I gave her a Minnie mouse pop up card for her bday! I also sent her a text apologizing for not coming down right away and telling her I didn’t wanna panic and make ur day about me especially since me and ur son talked all morning. She never saw the text 😅 We even bought her a sworaski ( I think that’s how you spell it) but it was a crystal groggy bc she loves grogu! The next day it was his cousins bday and my bf slept in so we got there late ( I tried waking him up several times) so I told him since we are late you gotta get her a gift and so we did!! When we got there everyone was with each other his cousins were with their friends and all the adults were together! So no one really talked to us and I even made him go in the kitchen to we can at least talk to his mom more!! I even helped them pick up a spilled drink! We gave her the present and she really loved it! But we left around 8 pm so we were there for 3 hours but we only left early bc no one was talking to us we both felt left out and ofc when we leave they kinda seem bothered. My bf asked if I could spend the next day but she said no that he needs to spend time with family. I totally understood so ofc i went home but also I kinda wanted to go home bc I was so anxious about ruining their day! My bf said that he wasn’t having fun and he was basically only hanging out with his little cousin who’s 8 and another who’s 15 but his cousins who were his age weren’t talking to him and judging him too!! His mom pulled him aside saying she was upset we used her bday to talk and I feel bad but I really tried to make it up to her getting her gifts and sending her a long apology text!! Also we couldn’t even spend the day with her bc we couldn’t even be in the same pool! Also last 4th of July I came over and we were supposed to go have a party but both his parents slept in so we did nothing and no one even said sorry! ( I felt bad for my bf more bc he was so excited to have a party) I just feel like even when we were around no one really cared to talk to us or be around us yet they wanted us around more. Also My bc had two older brothers and they didn’t go on this trip just bc they didn’t want to….. yet she’s mad at my bf for not spending enough time even tho no one ever tried with him! Idk I’ve been anxious with my ocd and I’ve been severely depressed ever since I got home and this situation is making it worse too!

WARNING LONG READ WITH A LOT OF GRAMMATICAL ERRORS Recently i went on vacation/holiday, with my friends to ayia nappa which is a very “lad culture” holiday with plenty temptations there as it is a proper party holiday destination. I have recently just got into my first relationship at 21 and in the past i have been more of a man whore getting with people on nights out which meant going on a lads holiday was something i didn’t want to do as my OCD always thinks the worst and thinks that I was gonna get overly drunk and ruin my relationship that i am extremely invested in. After a few days on holiday i had been out drinking and hadn’t had a single OCD thought of anything bad happening as i always had someone with me which was either my friends or girlfriend on FaceTime but on one instance after a night out drinking i decided to leave a club early and walk home on my own. During the night i remember all the events in the club and i remember most if not all the details of my short 10 min journey from the club to the McDonalds as i was only a bit tipsy, but there was a small gap in the journey i don’t remember. After waking up in the morning quite fresh for after a night out drinking, i have an extreme sense of anxiety (hangxiety) and guilt that i had done something wrong that night. So OCD kicks in as usual and starts thinking of the tiny gap in the journey that i don’t really remember that well because most likely i was just walking not doing much but OCD/my brain started filling it with fear that i did something wrong, I couldn’t think of anything that i did wrong that night and all i kept thinking was what if i did the worse possible thing that i could have done and that was kiss another girl as my amazing relationship would be ruined. After ruminating and ruminating for hrs on end for a couple of days i started visualising me kissing a girl on holiday, i have no memory of a face or situation just the vision of me kissing a girl with no face in either 3rd or 1st person. I kept going back to it saying I wouldn’t do that and why would i have walked home completely fine get a McDonalds, be happy and normal a lil tipsy though when i spoke to my friend at the hotel room, I spoke nothing about a cheating situation to him just about how good the burger was. I would know the second and remember completely the moment that if cheated on the love of my life wouldn’t i? It would have shocked me sober and scar my brain forever wouldn’t it? On the last day of my holiday i had stopped ruminating and didn’t have anxiety over the situation at all no more i kind of accepted that i didn’t do anything and gave the thought no attention. That was the case until one of my friends who also had a girlfriend had cheated on her the last night out on holiday and he said he couldn’t remember it very well and this was the ultimate trigger i went from nice and calm happy to go home, to full mental breakdown on the phone to my parents. Ruminating started again and it just didn’t end the what ifs kept going and going, with the main why/what if being, “if i didn’t do anything wrong why do i have this awful vision of me cheating on holiday?” I sat there on a 5 hr flight doubting, feeling guilty and making up all sorts of conclusions, even with all the reassurance from my friends and parents saying i didn’t and wouldn’t, but how would they know they weren’t there? I got back to England and as soon as i was home i went and saw my girlfriend, i could barely look at her the same as i did before holiday i just felt guilty but tried my best to ignore it, and be okay with my girlfriend and not show it but, everytime id laugh, talk about the future or just genuinely be really happy with her, id always get the though “what happens if i did do it?” And then id get worried cos i wouldn’t get to have a future with the girl i really do genuinely love. Nearly a month down the line i still think about it everyday while i have been getting therapy to help my OCD, but overall i have been a lot better and at one point for a week my mind wouldn’t even bother giving attention to it. But recently my mind has started drawing attention to it again and when I am with my girlfriend i just feel guilty and get down, start ruminating with the what ifs and making new Scenarios about the event again. It has got to the point where i just want to stop the torture and tell her i did it even though i know i wouldn’t and didn’t do it and that the vision is obviously fake. I relapse on the situation all the time and I just sit there wondering when will this “fake memory OCD” end as the anxiety and down moods i get from it has already started affecting my relationship as it constantly plays on my mind and i always sit there and think if i feel guilty i must be guilty. Sorry if this was a very long read just had to get this down, but if anyone else has experienced something like this could u please message how u have handled it as i am struggling at the moment and i don’t want it to affect my life too much, thank-you.

does anyone else ever feel like calling a private investigator on themselves so they can confirm or deny an event that took place ? desperately racking my mind for the memories, timeline, evidence is so exhausting bc it was too long ago to remember ☹️

I know it would be the best thing for recovery but i feel like its false to say every bad emotion or thought that we have is ocd... i would like if it would be true but it sounds unrealistic. Sometimes when i feel like i did something bad but im not sure, i get a strong feeling of guilt and beforeni would fall into that spiral of depression, i say its just ocd cause of the guilt feeling... but its normal that if you do something bad you feel guilt... so then i feel bad that maybe i avoid accepting that i did something bad and after that im afraid that im bad or what i did was bad and im trying to see if really is bad or its just my emotions, but that feels like trying to avoid accepting that i did something bad😅😅 I deal with alot of strange emotions and saying that every bad feeling i have is ocd... idk feels like im avoiding my feelings... But am i wrong? Is it really ocd ruling our emotions so we should count as ocd every negative emotion or reaction we have?

I always get scared that my boyfriend is not moral enough or something for me. We agree on most things about moral/social issues but sometimes he thinks somethings aren’t as big of a deal as I do. It scares me because what if he is wong and people think he is a bad person. I know he is a good person and he treats everyone well but I think I’m afraid of finding out he is not. Or like what if other people believe he should be more involved with an issue. I hate this cause it takes up so much of my time thinking.

I know people deal with this for years, with the anxiety, intrusive thoughts, unwanted feelings, depression, sadness,etc. it hits different when it’s unwanted bro. I am so genuinely tired, I do not deserve this mindset. Nor the anxiety. Like why me. & I don’t want this for years bro. I just can’t do it. Like I’m really tired & I don’t like myself, for the very first time. I do not like myself.

When closing your eyes do you start to notice imaginary convos or stories that relate to movies, things you’ve seen, or situations you’ve been in? I’m told this is a form of thought suppression but what do you do to refocus when trying to sleep because you realize these are made up stories etc ? So I pray? Count till I knock out?

how can you deal with regret from a real event 😣