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my OCD has been SO MUCH better since october but today it has flared up again. I accidentally took a sip of my coworkers drink that I thought was mine because it was right next to me unintentionally just a little sip but enough to send me into a spiral of thinking that I’m going to contract some kind of illness or that their saliva was in the drink and I drink some of it and now it’s inside of me 😖 once I let them know, they joked and said “ well I don’t have cooties and I’m sure you don’t either “ but I can’t help to think that something bad is going to happen over just that little sip. and I kept spitting/rinsing my mouth out multiple times just to be safe but still don’t feel any better.

Me and the guy I’m seeing are taking a break, he said that he won’t be seeing anyone else but can’t make any promises as to what’s gonna happen after the break. I just feel so stupid. The guys friend took me aside and told me to keep it calm and don’t over do it and now I think I’ve done exactly that! I know he’s going through some stuff and this break has nothing to do with me at all but it feels like I’ve done so much wrong! We’re still talking and stuff but he needs space and idk how to give it. I feel sick thinking about losing him but l don’t know what to do

This is a question that has been running in my mind lately, it started when i spoke to my friend. In the christian community we hear alot that without God people are lost and He is the only happiness, and i believed that, i still think without God i couldnt be where i am now, but my friend made me feel like this is only feels like it cause i found what works for me. And what was really weird for me, she told me she is happy without Him, and i find that many can get through disasters without God. She has a really good perspective about problems and before i thought you can only get that with God, but lately im noticing, some people without God can get through difficult times. And this made me question, could i feel good without God? Im a just believe in Him cause im afraid thinking that we are alone here? Like before i was losing faith in God, and there were time when because of pain i didnt believed in Him, but everytime i felt this feeling that something isnt right with that. And when i got back and i started feeling good i said im good because of God, i couldnt do it without Him. But now i find that alot of people recover from things without Him and my friend made me feel like its really juat a perspective... If He is the truth than shouldnt he be the only thing that gives peace to mankind? If other things makes humans feel good and at peace and happy, then how could He expect people to turn to Him when they can find peace at other places? I still choose to believe in Him cause this bond is strong, it just makes me sad that i question could i be happy without God too, maybe im just afraid of being alone...

I went to a traumatic experience 8 years ago, however I never struggled with anything at the time, however last year i started to get intrusive thoughts about STDs, I got tested for hiv hsv2 and 1, went to get a cervix examination at a professional OBGYN everything is clean however I keep thinking I got something now I am obsessing over HPV and it's driving me crazy I don't sleep at night I don't get out of the bed in the day all I do is being afraid to contaminat my husband who I just married, I went to get my nails done and I got cut i freaked out over the STDs I previously tested ,and i want to get tested again, I keep thinking how in few years he will be sick and it's all my fault , and that i ruined his life and he will never forgive me I am taking medication for my anxiety and depression , does anyone have the same thing? Is it normal? Does anyone know how to deal with this?

I am a 17 year old male. I am friends with this one girl (same age). We've known each other for about a year. And I've never really thought about her romantically minus a few thoughts here and there. And they always give me intense anxiety because I don't like her like that and I know she doesn't like me like that. But these thoughts persist and it freaks me out. What if I actually do like her? Like one, she's one of my friends, two I know I don't like her like that and don't want to. And 3 I'm interested in someone else right now. And any time she looks pretty i say to myself she's cute or pretty and then immediately freak out because it feels weird even though noticing that isn't bad necessarily. You can think someone is pretty platonically. But like it still gives me anxiety. Help!

My father always used to say: “There is no better investment you can make than in yourself.” I didn’t realize the importance of his guidance until OCD nearly crushed me 10 years ago. My life with OCD has been a journey, to say the least; a mountain higher than anything I’ve ever climbed before, but it’s yielded quite a few lessons along the way. Undoubtedly, the most important learning always remained “invest in yourself.” It hasn’t been an easy decade—I was misdiagnosed five times and hit rock bottom—but taking the time to invest in myself has been crucial. Here are the personal investments I made that changed my life. I hope they help you do the same.

Going to a restaurant for this tasting. My friend is late and we need to walk. The tickets were free so it doesn’t totally matter. I’m having a lot of catastrophizing thoughts.

I think I may have had the worst day of my life yesterday. It started when I struggled with sleeping, only getting three or so hours in before waking up at 6am. Around 8 I had a bad panic attack. I haven't had one that bad in a long time. I had to call my mom to come hang out with me until it passed. Then I finally got some more sleep, not enough still but a few more hours at least until my partner got home from work. They were tired so I had my mom take me to the grocery store so I could get something for dinner for us but we didn't make it there. We got in a car wreck. No one was seriously hurt thankfully. I was pretty shaken up, we both were. I had another panic attack from it in the parking lot of some random hair salon that we pulled into to get off the road. I already feel pretty invisible and like I don't matter so when the paramedic only asked me if I was ok and I said "I think so" it hurt my feelings a little that he left and never checked back on us. Someone else did add before leaving that we could go to the ER if we wanted but it just made me sad to feel so dismissed after getting into an accident. It didn't help that the police officer was a little combative too. We had to wait there for a good 45 minutes before we could finally go home. Of course, with my OCD, I had to shower right when we got home before doing anything because I was "dirty" for going outside. That was frustrating, I couldn't even sit down for a second first. And now it's the next day and I'm still so utterly exhausted and my poor partner, it was there car and they've had to be on the phone with insurance and stuff so they're pretty stressed about everything too and I feel like the absolute worst partner because I can't be there for them more or comfort them. With my OCD I can't even hug them unless I know we're showering afterwards. :( Plus it was partly my fault for the wreck since I was the one that asked to go to the store. If I didn't none of that would of happened. There was a lot of reasons it happened though so I don't fully blame myself and I'm not beating myself up too much but still. Worst day of my life I think and today isn't much better.

Thing is that i'm OBSESSED with a girl, i think about her all day and i hate this, i love My boyfriend, but she appears everywere and un everything, Even in unrelated things, She's a classmate and it's the third time i have an HOCD obsession with her, it makes me think and tried to make me believe im really in love with her, to also make me think i'm gay and makes me feel as if i don't want to be with my bf anymore, when i really love him and this actually started when i was scared of my bf falling in love with her.. i don't know what to do anymore, because Even if i Say i don't like her, it feels as if i'm lying, and also feels that i don't like My bf anymore which makes it Even MORE real, is this OCD? It feels like denial, but after the first 2 OCD obsessions with her i kept going with my normal life and loved My bf normally (Even tho i still had HOCD), pls answer:( i'm not gay, also, it came back because she cut her hair and now uses glasses, which i thought she looked cute or good in, but was scared of my boyfriend liking her, then it turned into, what if i liked her to directly thinking i'm in love with her (which i'm not and saying that made me anxious)..PLD READ I NEED ANSWERD :(

Does anyone here with harm OCD feel responsible for everything? Like future events and commitments? Like it's a burden?

I was raised Mormon and was very unhappy. I'm 17 and believe in God etc. but I don't want to be affiliated with a religion. And I feel like there's something wrong with that. I need advice.

I’m kinda going through a crisis with real even ocd . So basically me and my now bf had started dating back in December of 2020 but that only lasted 2 or 3 days and then we eventually dated again in may of 2021 and been together ever since . Okay back to December of 2020 I was a cashier at dollar tree and this man asked me if I play call of duty . I honestly don’t rmeber how it went . The convo since it was 3 years ago . So I wrote down my gamer tag. I think he was trying to flirt with me I seriouksy don’t remember how the convo went but I think he was trying to get at me if you know what I mean . but all I know is I remember writing my gamer tag down and giving it to him but I did not add him back. I think I was fond of the gesture tho . But I’m trying to figure out did this happen while me and my bf was dating during only those 3 days . Back in 2020 of December . Bc I rmeebr it haponed around the same to but like did it happen before we decided to date even tho it only lasted 3 days . My cheating ocd is eating me up and guilt . I feel like I should break up with my bf . Mind you I have obessed with this and I think talked to my bf about this already and he said it’s fine don’t worry about it but what if it’s not really fine morally even tho I can’t remember when I gave that boy my Gamertag. And by dating I mean being in a relationship *********

A few months ago, I was diagnosed with OCD. I’m not sure what changed, or flipped inside of me, but suddenly everything I was eating became scary. I would spend days not drinking water, or trying to force down at least some crackers and beef broth so I didn’t get sick. I have a fear of anaphylaxis, even with never being exposed to something I’m deathly allergic to. I don’t even have any allergies that I know of that give me hives or any type of reaction. I would feel my throat tightening, and my throat would turn red because I would scratch at it, and I could feel a tightening in my chest even with stuff I’d eaten my whole life. I was/am terrified of high allergy foods (shellfish, peanuts, tree nuts, etc) but I’ve recently began to try things again. I can eat almonds again without nearly passing out in a panic. Does this happen to anyone else? I feel like I’m the only one this happens to. It makes me feel completely weird, and it confuses other people.

Yesterday I was in shambles and in the evening/night I was somewhat better. Then this morning I still felt weird like im a fraud and not normal etc… but this afternoon I feel a little bit like myself but still know my OCD is around. Im going out to dinner with my aunt who knows I have a flare up. Probably going to end up talking about it. Anyways, every time i feel like I do get better or feel like myself again, i think to myself I might be coming out of it…. Then boom…next day I go back to square one. Is this common? Is this signs of recovery?

feeling guilty for wanting other men to find me attractive or hot. im disgusted in myself for wanting it or for maybe acting in a way that was provocative when im in a relationship. i love my boyfriend and would never cheat on him. but why does my head get filled with thoughts and wants about ither men. i’m beating myself up over this. can anyone share some insight??

Advice needed 8 years ago I had the worst experience ever with intrusive images. They were flashing like crazy. They felt immersive. They felt real. My first worry was “what if these are from god” and I found that other people experience that I proved this wrong… however it’s resurfaced Now it’s “your images look weird… nobody else’s images look like this” So I check my memory But god, it’s difficult to know what’s accurate and what’s not How do I prove it’s not supernatural? Not from god? Not from something else? Not something more than OcD? I’m afraid there’s a message - something telling me to do something bad I just want my old head back and not being in this space Please help

i hate ocd i hate the control it has i hate the inability to distinguish real from fake i hate the immense guilt i hate it feeling like a horrible person

I have this issue that I need help with and I would like to hear if anyone else has gone through something like this along with any tips. A few months back I had what was arguably my worst OCD episode in my whole life, it lasted a whole week, in this week I felt nothing but constant anxiety and obsession over this thought, it was like nothing in life mattered except this thought and that lead me to really become disconnected from what’s around me and become so occupied in my own head. After this week, I felt extremely numb and disconnected from myself and my identity which lead me to go down a spiral of disconnection and I had a lot of nostalgic sadness due to thinking “I miss the old days when things were so simple and I didn’t have severe ocd” and this caused me to become very sick of ocd thoughts to the point of suppressing them. Now it’s been quite some time and I have become much calmer but I still feel 2 main things from this extremely bad OCD episode that have stuck with me. 1) I feel extremely disconnected from my identity, my thoughts and emotions, I cannot name my emotions nor embrace them anymore and I can’t think straight (brain fog). 2) that sense of continuous background anxiety that I experienced in that week in my bad OCD episode has stuck with me and now I feel that anxiety all the time for no particular reason along with feeling dull, sad and disconnected. I feel like I have unresolved emotions and experiences from all this but at the same time I feel like I can’t point out anything specific that is causing me to feel this way. I have searched up symptoms for generalised anxiety disorder because of my continuous anxiety but I do not seem to match any of the symptoms, in fact I currently never feel anxious about anything except things related to my bad OCD episode. Please do not hesitate to leave any helpful comments if you have any :) and thank you in advance.

I don’t even know what to think or do anymore. I just think my fears are true and I’m in denial about it. I’ve been struggling with school and motivation for awhile now. My parents and family are amazing and have been paying for my education and I keep messing up. I am super lazy and I miss lectures, and I keep always telling myself I’m going to do better and end up barely passing at the end of the semester. I know we aren’t our thoughts but we are our actions and I feel like I choose to live content with being a burden and selfish. The fact that I choose to listen to the thoughts in my head and do compulsions shows that I really don’t care about being better because if I did I would just do it. I always keep thinking at this point that the morals that I had before OCD 3 years ago are gone. I keep questioning if I am not acting on the thoughts because that is my values and who I am or if I am just not acting on them because of luck. I don’t know if I am not acting on them because of how I feel rather than how acting on them would harm others. I am just so weak, and I don’t know if I deserve to live the rest of my life. And I feel so fucking guilty for saying this but there are times where I think about all of this and it doesn’t motivate me to change at all and I just can’t stand myself for that. I just feel like a sociopath who is constantly whining and complaining and screwing up. I used to feel like I did compulsions because I cared about protecting people and now I just think my compulsions are centered around my own selfishness and anxiety. It’s like there are times where I’m not trying to prevent myself from doing something wrong or trying to make sure that I don’t have bad intentions which is so messed up with the thoughts that I have.

This is my last post for today because im clearly in an ocd flare being on the app so much, BUT here is my question, im sure it falls into ROCD? But when ocd makes u question if you really love someone . Do you ever get a wave of anxiety when you tell them you love them? . Like your brain is saying youre lying ! For reference im married with two kids, sometimes when my ocd is acting up and attaching to SO-OCD, or ROCD, i will tell my husband i love him and get like a hot flash internally. just curious if anyone has experienced similar, its really not new for me but every once in a while it will bother me more than it should