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even though i really don’t want to kill anyone, it feels inevitable. like one day i’m going to snap and it’s going to happen. the thought of that keeps me so scared and stuck.

My mom wont let me go on medication, I don’t know what to do. I just want my mind to go quiet, everyone hates me and my boyfriend is also annoyed and made fun of my OCD. I just feel so alone

I need some help, my intrusive thoughts and counting compulsions have been very present during seggs with my boyfriend. Does anyone know how to deal with this?

I am going to talk about medications. Please do not read if you feel triggered. Hi, first of all I'll talk about my OCD. I think I have pure OCD and other types of OCD that I can't categoryzing. I always feel anxious about forbiden sexual things (behaviors, thoughts etc.), betraying friend of valentine, having doubts about myself such as "am I a pedo? Did I feel discomfort when I felt gronial responses?" etc. Because of my OCD I am having trouble in my life especially socially. I broke up with my boyfriends, I had lots of arguments with my friends, once I even talk about my obsessions with my brother (he is kind to me but I felt weird). Also my educatinal performance, my daily life, my health, diet is getting worse. Because I can't find the energy that I need. I start my therapy journey 3 months ago. I tried to have therapy before but I dropped out. But now I have really trouble with my OCD. I use Selectra (100 mg) medication. It is an SSRI. I don't think it is enough for me. Tomorrow I have an appoinment. I am going to talk about this. I need to talk about medicines actually. I know it might be dangerous. But at least I need to learn what are medicines that actually help to OCD. What are you using and how it feels?

And how are you dealing with it? Let’s have a discussion. I have health OCD and the worst part for me is that I will likely have to deal with health issues at some point in my life. So when I have intrusive thoughts about my health, it feels like they will come true at some point…even if they aren’t true now. Trying to reframe this but it’s been hard! Always welcome to suggestions.

Hi everyone, this post is more specifically for people who menstruate and might be able to relate… I got my nexplanon implant removed from my arm about 5 weeks ago. It triggered a complete emotional mental breakdown that lasted for about a week. It was the most mentally and physically debilitating week of my LIFE. I’m now medicated and in therapy with NOCD and hoping things will get better and I can have a better and fulfilling future. I’m also back on birth control (the mini pill, progestin only just like the Nexplanon). Has anyone else noticed that their ROCD is worse when they’re on their period or just with hormonal changes in general? Maybe because I’m hormonal everything is irritating and I overthink that until it’s an ROCD spiral? If anyone else has experienced this I’d love to hear about it and what might have helped you!

I remember playing the would you rather game as a kid. I did it earlier when I felt the urge to give into a compulsion and it helped funnily enough through the erp. I don't know if this could help others but it surprised me how effective it was

So i started to work on not to view everything as ocd cause that can be a compulsion, and if i have a though, question it. Many times im afraid to experience a thought cause of the emotions i feel because of it(thats normal). I have to add that one of my worst ocd subtype is suicidal ocd, it might be helful to you cause of what i will share to you. I like horror games, i dont know the reason, maybe the adrenalin, the problem is that in many horror games you see suicide. The one i watched now(yes i rather watch gameplays than play) it had suicide to which made me triggered. One thing i noticed tho, i was really afraid of the thoughts cause i could sense that it makes me hopeless. That i adapt the feelings that those people has, and in a bad situation i could think that. So now i dont want to view this as ocd cause i just had enough of labeling, maybe i misunderstand what is ocd. So i started thinking like this can be a real problem, maybe i would have that mindset too if something really bad would happen to me. I know just having a thought doesnt mean anything, but when you have emotions too its so hard to not see it as its yours, cause you experienced a feeling because you attached something to that. Lets take me who has ocd and someone who doesnt. We both experience a suicidal thought that makes us feel hopeless, me who is diagnosed with ocd, the treatment is ignoring and learn to not be afraid of it, yet the other person who doesnt have ocd will be diagnosed with depression and suicidal thoughts. His treatment is very different than mine but we experienced the same thoughts and feelings... This is why i had enough of all this things i learned... i heard to label every thought as ocd for now, clearly this wasnt really helpful, the we meet this other solution that not every thought is ocd, sometimes you have real problems. And you have to be ABLE to see what is a real problem and what is ocd. NOW tell me, someone with ocd how should see what is a real problem and what is ocd? We suffer with seeing everything as a real problem. If you ask me right now i cant decide if this suicidal thoughts with feelings attached to it means something or not. If you ask me later, maybe im 100%sure that i have a suicidal problem. But if its not and its ocd how do i know that? Another exemple, if you have sexual thoughts and feelings about someone you know it can mean that you are lustful, have a love problem, you need someone, you like the person, but maybe its just ocd. And again my point isnt that how do i know which one i have than i feel good, no, you need different solutions to each one. If its ocd you just ignore it, but that doesnt help you if its a real problem, cause if you have a lust problem and you ignore it, youre just avoiding the problem. Its not that easy, maybe treating ocd is not this simple as ignore and learn to not be afraid of it. Cause with ocd you never know which thought is a real danger, and you have to ignore every thought that makes you feel bad. Cause the one time you jump to solve a thought you are back az 1... But you cant live your life ignoring every thought that makes you anxious. And still with ocd the basic answer is you dont know if its real or not, and you move forward... so this means youre not thinking about your thoughts. So how you learn to think about those that are real bad things that stops you from living good?

This disorder sucks. I can't keep or make a friend. I never wanna go out with someone cause idk if they're contaminated with drugs or anything. People just don't wanna be my friend.

i see so many stories of mothers going through postpartum psychosis and then harming their children and it scares me so bad to the point idk if i want to have kids. what if that happens to me when/if i have children? anyone else have this fear :(

NF. I didn't even know I had ocd until an old friend of mine introduced me to NF. He has Ocd and raps/ sings about his struggles. I just want to share some of his tracks that helped me. The search Leave me alone If you want love Time Happy Hope

Hello, So I am On the waiting for list for ERP. I have looked into it , as I am nervous for It however I’ve heard that it’s quite difficult and can be mentally straining. I am quite stubborn in myself , as like I don’t want to change myself . As I am scared , worried, and I have been managing for a while now. Why do I need to change. However , I know it’s for the best. Basically I am asking. Has anyone done ERP - how did you feel. Also , how many sessions is there. As I’m worried if it s a maximum I feel like I’m being rushed.

Please help me… i get the most horrible sad feelings around my little girl… and my suicidal ocd goes crazy when im alone with her… I can’t do this… i can’t keep having horrible thoughts/feelings/urges especially suicidal ocd around my little girl!

I’ve noticed I tend to get sucked into (gradually like quicksand) ROCD thoughts, feelings and tendencies after arguments with my fiancé. Things could be great with him for weeks/months and then we might have an argument. The anxiety post argument tends to linger and I find myself beginning to spiral. Some times the spiral is worse than others and can go on for a couple weeks before I find equilibrium and peace of mind again. Can ROCD flare up after an argument(s)? Is that one of the things that triggers the ROCD? Can someone relate and share about your experience? Or confirm this happens? Thanks in advance!

I keep having images of me being gay and I really don't want to be . It has been in my head constantly for ages making me doubt myself and thinking if I come out I will be happier . This all stems from kissing a guy 16 years ago and being curious while I was drunk . I have a girlfriend that I love but this constant doubt is making feel distant from her I am now looking at random men everywhere and it's making me anxious . And when I see gay guys on tv I focus on them . I don't want to be gay . Struggling today

So just to clarify, I don't want or need reassurance. I'm just venting. Today I'm selling a car to a big dealer that's a multi million pound business and I'm going to lie to get a bit more money because I've struggled financially so bad for the last year. I know they'll end up just auctioning it off. It stresses me out due to my moral scrupolosity so this is erp for me. Lies, especially white lies caused a lot of grief for me during my life so its hard for me to justify doing it. This is more a case of needs over wants. Gahhhhh 🤯😞

I get paranoid a lot because of the feeling of being alone. I’m constantly talking to Jesus and listen to sermons and read Bible verses to help me. Due to health issues and body limitations I’m not able to clean the way I used to. Now that I have a home health aide, I’m having to adapt to someone touching my things and putting them different. I am finding myself getting annoyed with her, but I haven’t said anything. How do I deal with this?

Hello i was a porn addict for 16 years. Iam 25 abused alkohol and was sex addicted to girls never could have enough. Few months ago i was heavily drunk and without knowing ended up sleeping with a trans which i regret heavily I developed HOCD heavily which confused me and brought me to suicidal thoughts i was so confused that i actually believed that iam gonna turn trans without me wanting it then it developed to be scared that i could kill myself without wanting it. I want to just turn normal as i was can anyone help me ?

Im worried about myself, my family, my family’s friends, my friends, my dog :/ I just cannot rest I want to have some silence in my life, everything feels just so loud I can’t I just can’t I cannot tell if I’m being paranoid or I’m just idk

hii everyone, so, it has been about 2 or 3 years I’d say since I’ve been dealing with this. let’s just get right into it, so first, whatever I have (which might be OCD, I’m not entirely sure what it is) has taken over basically most of my childhood, and what kills me is that I’ll never get it back. one thing I know is that im not normal, i now get sleepless nights. why you may ask? because of my horrifying thoughts, “if you don’t look up you’ll be praying to the devil and you’ll go to hell!” “if you don’t say ‘God bless them’ their condition will happen to you!” “if you don’t say ‘good yetho 2x’ (idek..) ‘your mom will die 5x’ you’ll die and forget how to read. “if you don’t put your arms up, look directly up at the ceiling because if you look down you’ll pray to the devil so you need to look up, and say ‘Dear Heavenly Father, I pray that you forgive me for my sins in the name of Jesus Christ Amen.’ you’ll go straight to hell!” or whenever I touch a wall, i need to touch it with my small finger because if I touch it twice with my pointer finger my body will go to hell. it’s an endless cycle, and what’s even worse is that I may never be able to get help. I’ll never get that life back that I wanna live, and it kills me. I’ve named most of the compulsions and obsessions I have and I have 18 compulsions that are physical and about 5 obsessions that I really don’t wanna name right now. anyway, i really don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve done a lot of research regarding around disorders, and it’s safe to say that I may have OCD. Now, do i want ocd? absolutely not. however, there’s a family member in my family who has it. so the chances of me having it are strong, i don’t think I’m able to get better until I’m 18. an adult. I’m 12 years old, my mom has noticed my compulsions and me repeating certain words. but she does nothing, absolutely nothing. instead, she just argues with me over it. if I ever tell my mom to sit down and ask her about getting a test, she would probably call me the R-Slur and tell me I’m crazy. Therefore, I’m all alone in this situation with no one to help me. another obsession I have is about me catching cancer if I don’t do a compulsion or I might get paralyzed and get sleep paralysis. It’s so horrifying, there’s more obsessions and compulsions I have but I really don’t wanna name them right now. I cry almost every day because of how exhausted I am, and how much help i truly want to get but I don’t think I ever will. I’m unsure whether or not I have ocd, people tell me to get a diagnosis. but the situation I am in right now makes it impossible. i have no way of getting tested but I have a good feeling I have ocd, if you’re reading this, please try to give me your thoughts and what I should do, and if I even have OCD. Thanks! :))