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I’ve been doing Linsey Clancy exposures and I am beyond triggered. I feel like I’m declining drastically. Any advise? I don’t need any reassurance!

I am scheduled to have a meeting with my psychiatrist about going on an ssri and I am leaning towards trying Zoloft. Lexapro was also an option but I tried that in the past for a month, and went off of it for a reason I cant remember lol. I would love to hear peoples experiences on Zoloft good and bad!! Want to learn!

Alright so they say that when you do treatment at the beginning toughts feel even more real and you feel okay with it. But mine feels 100 percent real especially because of the real event and if I am okay with my thoughts or feel like want it okay with my theme and still have thoughts whaf feels real then I can't think that maybe it's real maybe it's not. Because it's so convincing. So if I do treatment I'm going to think that I am bi and being okay with it or even want it. But still not real? And somehow it starts to go away somehow?

I won’t go into details, but I was in an abusive relationships. I think the biggest reason why I couldn’t leave is because of my OCD. I struggle with harm and moral scrupulosity subtypes. Whenever my partner did something bad it’s like I had to prove that I’ve never done anything bad or anything to hurt them. Or else I felt like I had no moral ground to stand on. I just kept telling myself “well then you’re just as bad”. And I couldn’t leave until I confirmed that I hadn’t hurt them. I feel so stupid but I honestly believe that OCD trapped me in this situation. And I didn’t confide in anyone for a long time because every day with this person there were too many micro interactions that I was trying to keep track of, so I couldn’t possibly recount all the details to someone. And this is on top of all the other issues I had — OCD with work, etc. I had so many intrusive thoughts that I just couldn’t break free. I don’t know if anyone can relate but this was one of the worst things that OCD has ever done to me. Please get help asap and don’t doubt yourself.

Long, first post. I'm sorry 😬 I have many projects (novel ideas really) I really want to start, and honestly ruminate about them to try and "jump start" my brain into starting to write/do something with them other than the basic idea on my phone's notes app, basically try to get more story development. However, I never do start writing, or "I'll do it later, after this" and feel guilty all the time l about it. For example, I have a book I've been writing story/character notes for and even started to write a few pages last year (I started my social work masters program shortly after and used that as an excuse to not continue writing). However, in the last year, I never really stopped thinking about that book, and even said "I want to quit everything and just write" but now that I've graduated and am job searching, I have all the time to write, which *could* solve my money concerns as well. However, I feel I keep making excuses and/or picking up other household diy projects/other projects. I'm just at a loss of what to help get me to start writing. It's not that I lack the passion, it's just something that I feel weighted down by, that I'm scared I'll put so much effort for it to end up being a horrible novel when I care so much about it and feel really good and excited for the story. I do have an OCD therapist I plan to discuss this more with later this week as I started the topic but was scared to broach it more and ran out of time. But for now, I wanted to see if anyone would be willing to share any tips or tricks they use to start their projects? I just want to stop ruminating and feeling guilty for not starting/continuing writing and wasting time/life/space, etc. It all makes me feel so lazy, but I feel so trapped and weighed down, did I mention guilty 😅. Thank you all 🤗

I’m looking for tips and tricks for falling asleep when the intrusive thoughts are really bad at night. I’ve gotten into a fairly good routine: Medication at 8pm Brush teeth and do skincare immediately after Wind down time (tv, coloring or reading) Put on my bedtime movie and then fall asleep. BUT! the past couple of months but I am noticing that if I’m not in bed and asleep by or before 10pm, my intrusive thoughts get really bad. I have pure ocd and I tend to ruminate and fall into horrible panic attacks that can sometimes last days. I haven’t had a panic attack in over a month (!!!) But that doesn’t mean my thoughts aren’t still there. Long story short, if anyone has tips or tricks to go to sleep please let me know!

I’m 39 years old and I’ve gained new symptoms around my period Back then it was only physical but now like today I’m just depressed. I don’t wanna be around people. I hate everything I’m moody. I feel sad down just weird. Does anyone experience this a week or days before or during their period?

I’ve been doing really well with managing my OCD themes, but I’m having a big flare up due to seeing someone new. I can’t stop analyzing every message, interaction, delay in texting, way she speaks etc. Today in particular has been really hard for me and I can’t stop doing compulsions (rereading messages, going to ChatGPT/reddit, analyzing time stamps in between messages) and I feel so crazy. I struggle so much discerning this being intuition or just ocd/anxiety. I’m leaning towards the latter, but I just am exhausted by my mind at this point. I just needed to vent about it and if anyone has any advice / success stories of coming out on the other side of this, that would be awesome to hear.

I can’t stop the spiral and I physically feel panic 😵‍💫😵‍💫 I’m in this weird in between stage with the boy I love and we go from hanging out for days to not talking for a week in cycles. It’s a very complicated situation, so please don’t write it off as “just leave him!”. He fully explained last night how he truly loved me, how badly he wanted to get back together but we couldn’t right now, and I wasn’t alone in feeling really sad and confused about it. We broke up because I was convinced I had crushes on/I DID have crushes on other people and couldn’t stop beating myself up for it while it ruined his relationship with me. We’re closer than before but still so far. I’m so scared I’m going to do something wrong like develop a crush on someone else, I’m tracking every time I accidentally think about impressing another guy, I’m scared about feelings I felt for a male friend, etc. I’m completely on edge. I don’t know what to do to not be so on edge… idk how to know I don’t like anyone else or what to do with those feelings. I’m in a constant state of panic right now, and he’s feeling somewhat the same way which makes it better and worse. It’s hard not having certainty when we’ll see each other again right now. We both want to work things out so bad but I keep messing it up with my ROCD and feelings for others. If you have any advice on calming down I’d really appreciate it

I took a nap today and had a really vivid dream. After I woke up, I was watching Replay by Zendaya, and then my brain randomly created a scenario of me and a masc lesbian watching it together. It felt so strange because I got this really intense “fake excitement.” It almost sounded like I wanted it, but at the same time it felt anxious. It didn’t feel peaceful or comforting it just felt really confusing. Then I started thinking about my senior year and how excited I am for my boyfriend to eventually drive me to school, take senior pictures with me, and do senior sunrise together. Those thoughts made me happy. Later, during therapy, I told my therapist about the “fake excitement.” She asked, “Is that a new feeling?” As soon as she said that, I started overthinking everything. She also uses the phrase “being with another girl,” and immediately my brain played a scenario in the background. Then I started worrying, “Does she think I actually want this?” She later said, “What I’m hearing from you is that you don’t,” but I still doubted myself. After therapy I looked in the mirror while stretching and imagined my boyfriend hugging me, BECASUE when I stretch he already hugs me, but then my brain replaced him with a girl. Instead of letting the image pass, I started checking. I wondered, “Would I actually be happy?” It felt like I imagined a cute scenario, but it was like outside of me , but it was mixed with anxiety. Then I started thinking, “What if I really do want to date a masc lesbian?” When I even wrote “I do,” I got a brief love-like surge in my chest that quickly turned into anxiety. Later, while reading a reply, I saw the words “I found a clear answer.” My brain immediately created another image of me with a girl. I replayed it and pushed it further to see what I felt. It became vivid, and I felt that same “fake excitement” mixed with anxiety again. It feels so real and I’m so confuse I start doubting myself. Has anyone else with SO-OCD experienced “fake excitement,” intrusive scenarios that become more vivid the more you mentally test them, feeling like you’re digging endlessly for an answer, or doubting yourself so much that every thought starts feeling real? I’m not asking for reassurance.

I need advice please If I know I’ll see a guy somewhere my brain latches onto it when I’m getting ready, but I have someone I’m already deeply in love with. For example, when I go to the gym I know I’ll see Andrew. If my hair looks stupid, I’ll worry what Andrew thinks. I’ll look at my outfit and wonder if Andrew will think it looks cool. It’s automatic and I’m not TRYING to think it, but I do. I also don’t want romantic attention. Or it’ll be at work, like oh, Brody is gonna be managing. I want to look good so he thinks I’m cool. What if brody thinks my earrings look stupid? Etc… my lover is quite annoyed at this and I am too, because it sounds worse than it is but it’s still weird? What do I do? Now my brain is equating everything in my life to Andrew and I don’t even know him and it changes people every day!!

Just saw a video from a therapist about real relationship problem vs ROCD and I’m so triggered and worried. She said real relationship issues usually happen after a distressing event but this is what I experience with my ROCD or so I thought. She said other things as well and I’m so worried. According to her I guess I have real relationship problems I’m so scared

I keep having this overwhelming feeling I might have done something unconsensual in my past. I have tried to be careful ask for permission read body language but I worry I might have done something without realizing it. No one has ever told me I did anything nonconsensual but I still worry and obsess over it. I have to remind myself mutual friends have never said anything to me or the people themselves.

Recently I feel that I’ve been doing better. The attraction to same sex though is still there, I don’t get scared as much as I use to (sometimes I freak out but I calm down quicker with less rumination). Though times it feels like when I see a male, the feeling hits me but I know it’s not me. But other times it feels real. I’m trying not to engage and just let it be. It feels like this is forever and it’ll also be around though…

So I’m having a colonoscopy and I’m nervous. I know it’s good for me and let’s say I do have something it’s better to address in time but I’m scared it’s going to be something malignant. I see myself wanting to make plans for the days after my procedure but my brain tells me don’t make plans because you might have a polyp and it might be bad so you have to stay worried or doing things as average as possible so it doesn’t happen or maybe you’re prepared for it. I wanted to go on a date with my husband this Friday but my brain says well what if you can’t enjoy it because you have to wait for the results. What if you’re waiting to die. I wanted to paint my nails red but my brain says Dont, it’s a color you can paint after you’re sure you don’t have to worry about anything. Any advice?

I don’t understand how to stop mental compulsions. I feel weak that I can’t let go of someone that doesn’t want me anymore, but everything reminds me of her and then my mind spirals. I love her but that’s not enough and coming to grips with that feels impossible. It feels like this is a cycle I’m fated to repeat in all my relationships because I can’t defeat the spiral. Does anyone have any advice other than not to interact with the intrusive thoughts because that just doesn’t make sense to me. Maybe it’s my ADHD hyperfocus or a lack of understanding but I can’t seem to make that work.

Basically the title…. I’ve done amazing with not doing compulsions! I’m so proud of myself. But the thoughts have been in my head pretty aggressively regardless. They aren’t causing as much anxiety anymore, but I thought they would dissipate a bit more quickly with treatment. Does this mean I’m doing ERP wrong (I’ve been doing it maybe 1x every week), or is this just naturally how ocd goes?

notifications really really bother me. my brother and select few people mention a lot that i’m bad at answering texts, and they get kinda mad at me sometimes because i’ll miss things they’ve said. i don’t see it that way necessarily, i think relying on a text isn’t always good and it’s normal to follow up in real life, (which they don’t do, they make it my fault). i either get distracted or open the texts and don’t respond right away, but i always need to clear them. however, i made a connection just now while playing a game. i tend to like these styles of games, (games where you explore and upgrade your base and get higher level workers to gain resources.) now these types of games are hard for me to pull away from, the need to keep making more money, upgrade, nothing can be left untouched. while thinking about how i couldn’t get off the game, it felt similar to how i feel with notifications. the need to open everything, uncover everything, finish everything. i started to wonder if it could’ve been related to OCD. opening all notifications to clear them as a compulsion from the anxiety. i don’t know if any of this connects or makes sense but, it was like a a-ha moment, so maybe it means something. goodnight

Hi everyone. I’m really struggling today and would appreciate hearing from anyone who’s experienced something similar. For the past few days I’ve been stuck in what feels like a constant cycle of checking my feelings, especially around my relationship. Yesterday I had a sexual conversation with my boyfriend after we hadn’t really talked for a few days. I genuinely felt aroused with him, enjoyed talking to him, and loved hearing his voice. But almost immediately afterward I started forcing myself to imagine being with a woman to “check” how I felt. The scenarios became very vivid and I got a heavy feeling mixed with arousal, which scared me and k know it sounded working but my brain is making feel like I don’t like being aroused by him even though I do . Since then, I feel like my brain has been attaching sexual sensations to almost everything. I’ll see a woman wearing something revealing, someone in a bathing suit, or someone who looks masc, and I’ll get a warm/heavy sensation. Then I immediately start wondering if it means I’m attracted to women. Sometimes I intentionally keep imagining scenarios to see what happens, and the sensations seem to get stronger. It feels like I want to keep daydreaming, but it also doesn’t feel like me. I honestly can’t tell if I’m forcing it, if it’s just a body sensation, or if it means something. Two days ago I went to Sam’s Club with my family. While we were getting pizza I saw one of the workers through the window and kept looking at her because I told my sister “ I’m gonna make a silly face to the chefs “ and I did but I kept staring at this one girl and I studied her face and she looks a bit masc and it suddenly felt like I had a crush on her? BECASUE I kept staring at her . Then I became anxious and kept looking again to check my reaction. Later I watched a movie with my dad and thought one of the actresses was really pretty. I even wished my face was flatter like hers. She looked kind of masc to me, and I got another heavy feeling that my brain interpreted as attraction. Then I started spiraling again. This morning I also woke up half asleep, saw a bunch of Instagram notifications, and immediately thought they were from my boyfriend. I felt annoyed for a second and panicked that it meant I didn’t love him anymore. It turned out the notifications weren’t even from him they were from my friend. Something else that happened me and mh sister were making clay figures and I made two wiener dogs that are me and my boyfriend with two different shades of green as their collar because we both love green ( he copied my favorite color) But then I remembered the thoughts later, I started checking everything again. I keep worrying I’ve somehow changed. I keep wondering if my sex drive changed, if I’m maturing, or if my orientation changed. I even worry that because I watched porn in the past, something permanently changed. Every time I think I’ve found an answer, my brain finds another thing to analyze. I love my boyfriend to death he’s my everything . He’s my first long-term relationship. I want a future with him, and I want to be. But my brain keeps asking “What if?” over and over. One thing my therapist asked me was, “Look at your actions. Are you actually doing anything?” The answer is no. I’m not pursuing women or wanting to leave my boyfriend. I’m mostly trapped in this endless cycle of checking thoughts, feelings, and body sensations. Has anyone else experienced these heavy body sensations, warm feelings, or intrusive “attraction” that become stronger the more you mentally check them and it makes you believe you are bi or lesbian ? I’m also confused why after that I don’t care anymore but it’s like I keep doing it without thinking until it feels real .

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on my relationship and wanted to get some outside perspectives because I can’t tell if what I’m feeling is a compatibility issue or something that can be worked through. The important part is that I know my boyfriend loves me. I don’t question his love or his intentions. He’s kind, listens to me, comforts me when I’m upset, and I know he genuinely cares about me. The issue is that I don’t always feel loved because the way he naturally expresses love is very different from the way I receive it. For me, I feel most loved through consistency, emotional openness, quality time that feels intentional, playful friendship, affection shown through actions, and little things that make me feel like I’m on his mind. I don’t need grand gestures I just want to regularly feel seen, chosen and emotionally connected. Just like the way I see others (I know not to compare but it’s something I long for). He’s much more reserved. He’s not very expressive emotionally, doesn’t naturally show affection in those ways, and can come across as nonchalant. One thing I struggle with is that he doesn’t feel very consistent. Sometimes he seems engaged and present, and other times his mood feels distant or out of place, even when nothing is wrong. I know he’s busy, and I’ve wondered if he’s just naturally awkward or not very expressive, but then I start questioning whether I’m making excuses for behavior that’s simply not meeting my emotional needs. The confusing part is that whenever I’m upset, he becomes incredibly attentive. He listens, comforts me, reassures me, and acts like the emotionally present person I’ve been wanting all along. It almost feels like I only receive the type of love I crave when something is wrong, instead of during everyday moments. Because of that, I don’t find myself wondering, “Does he love me?” I know he does. What I do constantly wonder is whether I’m wasting time. I worry that if this is simply who he is, am I staying in a relationship hoping for something that may never come naturally? At the same time, I’m scared of walking away from someone who truly loves me if this is something couples can learn and grow through together. I keep wondering if there’s someone out there whose natural way of loving would align more closely with what makes me feel loved, or if every long-term relationship requires accepting differences like these. I also constantly find myself caught between two thoughts: “Maybe this is just his personality, and I’m expecting too much,” and “Maybe I’m dismissing my own needs because I love him and don’t want to lose him.” I genuinely can’t tell whether I’m giving reasonable grace to someone who expresses love differently, or whether I’m talking myself out of recognizing a real incompatibility. Then I think about what qualities he does have and I think we have a lot of similar morals and values and have lots of similar interests. So the question I keep coming back to is: Can a relationship work long-term if someone loves you deeply, but their natural way of showing love doesn’t make you feel loved? Has anyone been in a relationship like this? Were you able to learn each other’s love languages and genuinely meet in the middle, or did you realize that love alone wasn’t enough if your emotional needs were fundamentally different? I’m looking for honest experiences from people who’ve been through something similar. I don’t think either of us is doing anything wrong I just don’t know whether this is something couples grow through or whether it’s a sign that we’re fundamentally incompatible.