Kickstart your recovery journey with a caring community of others
working to conquer OCD
Help please someone help, I’m so scared. I’m having fears of being lithosexuak and I really don’t want it to be true. I’m scared that I feel sexually attracted to guys but lose that attraction when reciprocated or don’t want reciprocating. I’m freaking out. Please help please please please
Does anyone elses OCD involve religion? I'm a Christian, but I feel my OCD is causing me to stay away from my church and religious practice
It struck me today that while I've been getting to know all of you, you haven't had the chance to get to know me as much. It's important to me that relationships go both directions. So here's your opportunity. Any questions about me, my OCD, my recovery, etc. are all welcome.
Can someone please talk with me I'm spiraling
Does anyone feel extreme OCD guilt for going out during this virus? I can’t get the guilt out of my head. I have been practicing social distancing and only going out when I need to now for the last week. I just keep thinking when I went to a store that wasn’t necessary what if I passed this virus to someone?
I just had an intrusive thought and it felt real, but I wasn't having anxiety at all. Does that mean that it is actually real? I heard that ocd feels real due to anxiety, but I had no anxiety this time and it still felt real. Is it real then? I'm freaking out
I feel like when I have a break from my obsessions, which is great but too short lately, when something triggers me, I don't freak out, I breath and try to accept (and not ruminate or check out test or reassure), but then it's like I have OCD goggles on after that. Everything seems to remind me of my obsessions, I've seen it called selective abstraction. I'm thinking this is where I need to refocus and allow for the uncertainty. Just wondering if anyone else can relate.
Also: was trying to help my friend with rocd, and he kept saying but mine could really happen, we could break up. And I started to doubt myself with HOCD. I know anything is possible, and I recommended this app to him.
Does anyone have any advice for helping your partner deal with your ocd? Mine is getting frustrated feeling it's stupid and finds intrusive thoughts I try and share hurtful.
I'm struggling today. Everything is an indicator I'm bisexual. Any one who struggles with hocd have you done anything that helps you when you're struggling?
Ok If anyone could help me cause I try to limit posing questions and this might be my last one, I really need help right now ... We all do. But please, I’m desperate to understand me. If you guys have time to me read my story, I pray for you and for all of us.. When I was a kid, in kindergarten, I remember my first crushes to be girls but then it disappeared. I started being a little gay kid stereotype playing with dolls, being quite feminine and earlier starting masturbating and watching muscular men since I was and no joke I think 7-8 years old. And I think this is somehow connected to the behavior of my abusive father who beated me and my mom. So yeah till age of 15 I watched gay porn and enjoyed it, I was finding like that protection there. At 15 high school started and I get to talk to this guy who was gay. What felt like a crush at first it was the worst anxiety, depression period ever. I was very skinny, didn’t eat all. Almost no friends. So somehow, something wasn’t right. So it all ended after starting going to a psychiatrist. Spring came. Something changed. I DON’T KNOW WHAT BUT. I started working out. I started being more happy. And I started noticing girls As my past actions seemed more and more not me and disgusting. Turning 16 it was like I was another person, another goals, I was more confident.. I starting having crushes, I was finding girls attractive sexually emotionally, as the gayness of the past evaporated. Till December 2019 when something was born in me. The past memories started coming in my head. I was getting images who make me anxious, disgusted. Feeling gronial arousals started makes me scream. This can’t be. It likes a ghost of the past comes. When I think of a girl I get a warm sensation in my soul and in my area, but the hocd thoughts are just like knives in my chest. Let’s say If I see a photo of a dominant, build up man I panic as hell and get this tiggling weird gronial. I calm myself as I say « I’m equal to you, You’re not superior to me, I am masculine as well » Guys, I know I can’t be with a man I’m disgusted thinking about kissing or doing stuff but I’m haunted by my worst enemy: ME Please, If you read all of this. Write something in the comments. God bless you. I need help. I need to understand. I pray for all of us. We all have problems but I’m sure we all will get over them. Stay healthy and safe!
Hello Everyone, So I have been struggling with severe anxiety in regards to my relationship for months now....it started with intrusive thoughts about whether or not I found him attractive and then his personality....however now I find myself feeling so numb to him and unable to see anything but negative things which brings me to wonder if I’m forcing my relationship even though he is the best guy I have ever known.....I know I routinely struggle with giving into compulsions however it feels so real right now and in the last few days I’ve freaked out and almost ended things three times......I really want to stay with my partner but I’m scared I shouldn’t even though I want to so bad......I love him and I don’t know how I let myself get to this point....it is mostly all I think about and I just want to be happy......I really need some advice as to whether or not this is relationship anxiety or not.....
So I had a good intimate dream about my husband last night (it really gave me feelings of my sexual self before I had ocd) and I woke up and felt really good. But because I felt so good, my ocd attacked the good thoughts by thinking “well what if you replaced him with a cute girl instead?” And then my brain made me think I really liked it and was comfortable with it. And then I would check how I felt when I compared the thought with a girl vs. my husband and the thought then of sex with my husband (or any guy) made me feel anxious and sick, enforcing my thoughts that I’m lesbian now. And I just feel such guilt. My poor husband. It’s not fair to him. And it’s not to me. I just don’t know what to do anymore. How can I be straight when I find the male anatomy disgusting?
I've decided to put my story here in order to help the people feeling miserable and lost. I got ocd about 5 months ago, and it shocked me to my core. I was feeling helpless and scared, and the fight-or-flight i felt during these dark days was destructive. I started doing ERP not so long after I realized that IT was the only way out. After a lot of suffering, anger, sadness and avoidance, despair also, I decided that I would rather die from my fear and doubts than continue walking the path of compulsions and OCD. I am only 19 years old, and have never experienced something as painful or destructive as this condition i am in. I realized after a lot of thinking that I had to go ALL IN. ALL or NOTHING. SHORT TERM PAIN AND LONG TERM GAIN, OR VICE VERSA. Of course, I chose the first. I am currently feeling the most anxiety in my entire life and not doing compulsions. IT truly feels like heroin withdrawal when you start doing the recovery work. IT is like walking on the most unstable ledge there is, and it feels horrible. BUT IT IS ABSOLUTELY WORTH IT, BECAUSE THE ONLY WAY AROUND OCD AND ANXIETY IS STRAIGHT THROUGH IT, BASICALLY GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE YOU WOULD RISK YOUR LIFE IN ORDER TO RECOVER. THAT IS OCD TO ME. A signal from your brain that I've been processing """negative"""" emotions the wrong way, and been lacking acceptance. That is how I Got to understand my disorder. Here is a list of a few things I would've never accomplished if it weren't for OCD: 1. I would have NEVER started meditating and aiming to be mindful. 2. I would have NEVER become humble. 3. Never would I hit the gym and obtain the good physique I now have. 4. Psychology and the human brain would've never been interesting to me, if I haven't experienced excruciating mental pain myself. 5. Got to finally know myself, the person I've been neglecting my whole life. Therefore, I guarantee to you, that IT is NEVER TOO LATE to start doing recovery work (ERP, ACT and Mindfulness including physical fitness sports the gym...) No matter what, know that you are not alone and that IT will be the hardest thing you have ever done, but IT is DEFINITELY WORTH IT.
The past few days, I have been dealing with my OCD. My poison Self-Harm OCD. More specifically suicide. Now, I tell some people this, and they immediately get worried (Which is understandable), but what I am going through is the fear of doing the act. I don't want to die. A few days ago, I had allergies, and I thought I had the coronavirus. I starting getting nervous because people were dying from it. I can say now that I want to live, but these thoughts are SO repetitive and uncontrollable. Alongside with it, I have anxiety. Heart pounding anxiety (sometimes it goes to the extreme of panic attacks). I am not asking necessarily for advice, but I want you to know if you deal with HOCD, you are not alone. And if you don't know anything about this, well, you do now. ?
Does anyone else feel shaky and spacey when they’re having a bad ocd day. I feel like I’m barely in my body. I keep having to manually refocus and resume what I’m doing.
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
OCD doesn't have to
rule your life
