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Does anyone ever have really good days where you think all these thoughts were just silly and then suddenly everything hits you and you can't escape? Do you also question whether it's really OCD or not?

I thought I could handle going onto instagram but turns out I cant. I saw a few posts that triggered my ROCD (but felt like real concerns) - you’re incompatible if you don’t share the same future vision, if they’re not ready for what you’re ready for, and they don’t communicate like you or have the same values. All hot spots for my ROCD. I made the mistake of not doing ERP, and then spiraling with my boyfriend who is traveling for work the next 3 weeks and doesn’t have time to talk on the phone since he works 14 hours then crashes and wakes up again to do it again. I’m spiraling. I hate myself and now I’m spiraling that he’s going to break up with me.

Would either of count as warning signs of abuse (to clarify -my partner has never called me a bad name, raised his voice at me, controlled what i do, or hurt me in anyway) There are three instances that come to mind that I can't stop playing over and over in my head. I almost think I'm distorted the memories the more i replay it but I'm terrified of unknown abusive relationship Once we were at a restaurant and I was in someone's way and he told me to get out the way but I didn't hear him so he grabbed my forearm to move me - I said don't do that and he apologized One time I was jumping all over him in the elevator of my building and trying to spice up the mood so I pressed up against him. The elevator doors were about to open and he said babe stop and then as they opened he pushed me off of him. He told me he was scared there was going to be people there which was understandable and he did tell me to stop. We were just playing around but what If i'm making excuses for him. He told me he doesn't like the new capri pants I bought. He never has said I can't wear them he says they just arent his style and has never controlled what I wear. I will even say would you care if I wear this to test him and he always responds "you can do what you want" I love my partner so desperately and want to stay with him but what if these are early warning signs of abuse. I can't stop replaying these three memories in my head to make sure i'm not in an abusive relationship and feel crazy. I can barley be around my partner or work because I'm being haunted that I'm somehow in an abusive relationship I need to leave. I know if i said this stuff to him he would be shocked and saddened.

I just ate a piece of cake and I am worried that my sugar intake is out of control, and I can’t stop eating sugar. I worry that I will become over weight and ppl won’t want to be with me. All I am thinking about is the cake and I’m drinking hot water because I believe it will melt the sugar away.

I hate when my brain makes me think some how I’ve cheated on my boyfriend I keep thinking about this one time I was with an old friend and she met this guy online and wanted to play a game with him and me he was the type to like “flirt” in a joking way but I still said multiple times I had a bf so eventually my friend leaves and it’s just me and him I felt bad for leaving too and I wanted to try and make a friend so I stayed around he kept being weird in that joking flirting way and I was constantly either ignore it or laugh it off but my brain is making think I cheated by staying in the call with him because of how he was i never spoke to him since cause he said something really really weird towards the end and I told my friend and we cut him off and I feel like if I told my bf he would leave because I think that he’d think that I cheated on him I just wanted to try and get to know the guy I didn’t want anything more than that it wasn’t just towards me he was doing it with her too I fear I’m about to give into a compulsion and tell my bf due to the anxiety

recently got a rlly rlly good experience w my bfs friends the 4 of us spent all day together just talking and connecting and it was particularly happy cause me my bf and his friend who i used to have problems with and stuff but i lwk always wanted his validation / approval. we were on adderall (legally & prescribed to all 3 of us because we have adhd) which i think added to the element of happiness in the air i was too positive abt everything. anyway i bonded w them super well felt so happy about the experience it lasted hours it was just me explaining sm things that happened to me and them defending me it was great. then that night me and the friend stayed up all night talking because we were both up from the adderall since we took it too late, and i know that sounds weird but it was very much okay with my bf he wants me and this friend specifically to patch things up and we built the foundation that it would be ok for me to do that w this friend i wouldnt w others but this friend is all platonic. and this friend and i actually have a traumatic past being involved w the same girl and it traumatized us so badly so yesterday we talked for hours and hours abt how i try to be genuine & we debriefed that trauma and a million other deep life things ofc. but part of me feels so weird because what if im trauma bonded to him and catch feelimgs which i don't want at all and when i was w my bf today i felt so weird maybe bcs of these thoughts and the lack of sleep and the come down but i automatically assumed it means im not interested / in love since i cant physically feel it but i want to be in love w my bf forever no one else. but what if i do like this other guy and today i had a super split 1 second of jealousy w him and then it went away and i wanted him to hang out w us today but when i thought he wasnt or when i tried getting him earlier w my bf and he wasnt there i cant tell if i was too sad or if i just didnt wanna be there without my bfs friend which i do NOTTT want whatsoever which is why im stressed. me and my bf been spending last 3-4 days all day long but im scared im not enjoying it how i would if i loved him even tho i want to desperately and am kind of sure i do but this new bond is insanely heavy and i can usually adapt to a new guy friendship easily but this one stressed me out bcs the conversation was intense but i need advice is this ocd like is this a normal response will it wear off so i go back to good w my bf?

My OCD tends to get really triggered by quotes, different instagram posts, TikTok’s etc. I keep having reoccurring thoughts that I did something to cheat on my boyfriend early on (we have been dating for 6 years) with guy friends I had on Snapchat at the time. Not too long ago I saw a quote saying “someone from your past is going to resurface unexpectedly”. I saw this quote at the same time I was having this horrible OCD flare up. My OCD seems to connect itself to different things like this quote. In my head this means it’s conformation that I did something and now something is going to come up and ruin my relationship even tho I don’t remember doing anything. Then today, I saw a instagram post saying that “Because of our faith in Jesus, we learn that nothing is random or meaningless”. This triggered my OCD again because now I think that I didn’t see the quote “someone from your past is going to resurface unexpectedly” on accident and that it means I did something bad. I also always see quotes in instagram saying “don’t ignore the signs you asked God to show you” and it really messes with my head. Does anyone else deal with this. I feel like it’s completely irrational but my OCD attaches itself to different things and patterns trying to prove to my mind I did something wrong. I prayed to God for a sign and to just reveal to me if I did anything and don’t remember. Is this a sign I did something wrong or is it my OCD?

Idk if this is an OCD thing or a just a me thing but I have a very strong aversion to drugs(other than drinking/smoking) and if someone I’m dating does any at all even if it’s barely at all, it feel exactly the same as being cheated on. Like same level of anxiety and everything and legit makes me feel betrayed and sick. Anyone relate?

So I've been struggling with this for more than 1,5 years... My ocd about my relationship began so suddenly. At first it was just anxiety,but later it was about an old friend of mine. I had a huge crush on him before my bf and since I met my bf I didn't feel anything anymore and we just grew apart. Until my ocd thoughts started about the old friend. I keep comparing everything with him until I feel satisfied with the fact it's feels better with my bf than it would with the old friend. I don't want him!!! He wast the person I needed and me and my bf have such a beautiful relationship and I love him so much..the ocd goes and comes but it's always about the old griend and sometimes I begin to doubt the fact it's ocd or it's just meant to be with the old friend?? But I don't want that!!! I am so happy with my bf and I don't want the old friend!!!! I keep revising the same sentences to comfort myself and I can get trapped in the thoughts for minutes! How can I stop this...what if it goes on for more years ugggg....hoping the ocd goes away soon again. Because sometimes the thoughts do go away but now it's back...

This question is from a religious perspective. I know we have to be good, but we cant be all good, we have to stop sin, but we cant stop sinning fully and we are saved either way, cause its not our actions that sends us to heaven, its God's grace. So anyone who accepted Christ as their saviour its saved, he can still sin, he can still be a bad person, unkind with people, have sex before marriage, do bad things, he is still saved. This makes me angry cause i try everytime to eb a better person and sometimes i just get tired cause i get alot of temptation and i fight to not act on it and be kind person but then i get tired of it cause of many things, and i see people that accept Jesus but they still live an earthly life and enjoy their life better than I do, and they will be in heaven too. Im not saying thes shouldnt, im just talking about whats the point of all of this? If i try to be a better person i get hit by how sinful i am,i feel guilt and i want to avoid being sinful but it doesnt work, and i feel guilt repenting, and there are others who just live their life like others. I have really bad sexual temptations, i dont know if i will be able to not have sex with my girlfriend(when i will have one) im always thinking that i will fight somehow, but there are other christian who doesnt wait till marriage and nothing bad happens, they feel a little bad but they still do it, they are happy, and i will be there struggling to not sin, and maybe it will even do bad for the relationship... What's the point? I struggle with this alot, if im saved why do i have to fight so hard to not sin if im unable to be fully sinful but im still saved? It's like we know its bad to steal food from a store but they would say " you wont get fined or penalty for that but pls dont do it" you will say okay but what happens if youre starving and you dont have money? You dont get any penalty, of course you will steal instead of dying by starvation, and then you live freely... they still welcome you to the store. I know this shows how God really loves us and its beautiful, but then why try to be soo good, why try to be like Jesus if we can never be like that... and as i said many "sins" doesnt seem like its really hurted someone, like i know christian people who had sex before marriage and they still live happily. Or i heard people saying they dont feel bad or guilt having sex with random girls and they are christians... Im struggling with having thoughts that many things i do is a sin and i want to think its okay Jesus saved me, but i feel like a bad person, that i use Jesus pain to just sin...

I broke up with my partner because I didn’t feel like it was fair to her to have to be with someone who was in constant doubt over his attraction and the relationship long term.. now I’m missing this person and am having a hard time trusting my decision or what to do next.

If anyone wants to talk, or put together a support group with a bunch of us so that we can chat and be there to support each other that would be great for me! I have been having a really hard time with HOCD recently accompanied by False Memory and Real Event OCD, and I don’t really have anyone who understands or can agree with me on this. Not for reassurance purposes but just for peer support! Would be helpful!

I feel so unhappy. I have the most beautiful guy in the world as a boyfriend, and living with my intrusive thoughts is becoming unbearable. I just want to feel in love with him as I were before, with no intrusive thoughts. My ocd started all in a sudden: one day I was so in love and obsessed with him and the day after I started ruminating and never stopped. I can’t handle this anymore, it seems like I’m denying something that it is inevitable, that is I can’t love him because I’m lying to myself about my sexual orientation. I’m so tired, really, I don’t want to be lesbian because I don’t like being with girls, I don’t like the idea of being with a woman, I don’t want to be sexually involved with them, I don’t want to marry a woman. But then when I think about it, I automatically think that it’s because of society that taught us to behave as heterosexual. I really love my boyfriend, I think my ocd started because I am so scared to loose him. I love spending time with him, I love when he is around, I love talking to him, I can see myself in a future life with him, and he’s the perfect person to have children with. I just want this for my life, is it possible that everything can change from one day to another?

Hello! I recovered from my severe religious themed OCD about 3 years ago. I thought my OCD had went away but I'm starting to think it's still impacting my life. Or maybe I just have high anxiety now. I have been told I'm a perfectionist and I have a huge fear that I'm not always "living correctly" which causes me to intensely compare myself to others and other things. This fear got so bad last august that I got into a relationship with an emotionally abusive person just because I thought I was falling behind. He was my first boyfriend and now I'm dealing with the affects of this. Im a baton twirler and although I'm getting better with exposure therapy.. I have anxiety attacks when I don't perform or practice perfectly. Where I can't even twirl in front of my mom right now without just shutting down and panicking because I somehow think she's judging me harshly when she's not at all. I also avoid doing assignments in school or asking questions because I have a huge fear of being considered slow or getting a bad grade. But this also makes my grades worse so it's a terrible endless cycle. I'm out of the relationship and I'm starting to take care of myself but I'm just kind of rusty on OCD knowledge and I'm trying to figure out if these are just new obsessions or if I'm just a perfectionist. Ever since I was little I've had this cronic fear of missing out or not feeling perfect for myself or others. And failure makes me flip the fuck out.

I am getting married in two months. Today was a terrible day. I went to church with my fiancé and there was no attraction at all and I felt I was towering over him so much taller. I couldn’t stop thinking about the attraction all day long. It just got worse as the day went on. What do I do in these situations. It is so bad at times:( what should I do when this happens

I have known for a while that I may have OCD. After downloading this app and reading everyone else’s experiences, I am certain I have OCD. In the past few days, I have had serious relationship doubts and my thoughts in general have become so loud that it’s debilitating. There are so many voices that I can’t move or do anything. I just shut down so I can shut them up. Now, basic decisions are paralyzing. I can’t make a grocery list, pick a tv show, or decide when to leave for school. My brain just freezes now when I have to make any sort of decision. Any tips on how to get past this? How to shut the voices up so I can finally think for myself?

My husband has been struggling with ocd for honestly I think most of his life. Officially diagnosed in the last two years now with paranoia as well. It’s difficult. I struggle myself with some anxiety and depression and overthinking situations. And we both have struggled self insecurities and insecurities in our relationship. He always tells me I don’t want to loose you after he has been is a dark place and needing reassurance. Right now we just feel very disconnected after a situation. I been trying to be as understanding as I can. And acknowledge that we both need to not seek so much reassurance from each other. Anyone have any tips on ways to feel connected again after an intense ocd episode?

These past couple days, Ive had 2 huge panic attacks in a row. I’m getting worried because they were kind of the worst theyve ever been. I couldn’t function at all and if my partner weren’t with me, I’m afraid I wouldnt have been able to move or get up. I was convulsing and couldnt stop having the worst intrusive thoughts. I was so disappointed in myself that I started having super intense suicidal thoughts and couldn’t speak. I really hate ocd. I ruined some of the most fun days that were planned out in a trip too. Idk what to do anymore

Hey everyone! This is my first time posting on this app and I’ve been wanting to write my story for a while, but was always so scared to. Now, i feel comfortable enough after reading so many relatable posts and stories when it comes to suffering with ROCD. Every relationship I’ve been in, ROCD has always popped up in different ways. The same questions will always pop up, “Am I with the right person? Am I attracted to him? Can I see a future with him?” And then the BIG and SCARY one, “Do I love him??” Eeeeek!!! Currently, I am in a happy and healthy relationship with my marine boyfriend for more than a year now. The first couple of months of dating him, there was no doubt in my mind that I didn’t love him or find him attractive. I was head over heels for this man and always had a hard time saying goodbye whenever he had to go home, which was two hours away (ik not too far, but never knew when the next time I was going to see him since his work schedule was always up in the air). ANYWAYS, my ROCD started flaring up in this relationship around month 9 when we started talking about our future together since he will be moving to another state in few months (life of a marine moving bases every couple years). The feeling of the ROCD symptoms wasn’t like WHAM here’s ROCD! It started popping up slowly. First, I started getting anxious with the idea of moving, which is completely normal, but then, questions like “Am I ready to move and leave my family in a few months? Can I see myself getting married to him? Is he the one?” It was like a domino effect and more dominos kept adding on and getting scarier. Lately, it’s been thoughts like “Do I find him attractive? Do I like his side profile when he drives? Is he annoying when I hear his voice on the phone?” I always feel like a horrible person thinking these thoughts and I desperately want to go back to how to my normal self in this relationship. It feels like im always self sabotaging every situation like celebrating holidays together and hanging out with our families. I never feel present during the fun times with him and I’ve been feeling this way for five months now. Every time I see him now, I feel this heaviness anxiety ball in my chest and my heart beating fast like I should run away from him. DEEP DOWN, I know that’s not what I want but these scary thoughts have been going on for so long now, it’s getting unbearable to the point I just want to give up and break up with him even though DEEP DOWN that’s not what I want. I feel like even that deep down feeling is disappearing and I don’t feel like my happy self anymore. It’s physically and mentally exhausting to the point I don’t want get out of bed. The only time I feel some sort of relief/peace is when im home alone or at work (preschool) to keep my mind busy. ROCD IS NO JOKE and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I sometimes feel like maybe it’s not ROCD. My mind is so mean to me and back and forth. It’s horrible to suffer with this pain and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Just know that if you are dealing with something similar, you are not alone.

So here’s how my life has been, I was one day watching TikTok and suddenly a random fearful thought popped up in my mind saying “what if im secretly gay” and I had anxiety for the rest of the night and continued since December 20 to now. But here’s the thing. Im still sexually attracted to women and i even just have gotten a girlfriend which is a girl that I have wanted for 2 years and never got the chance and even felt really sad that she went with another guy and stopped talking with me. But now I’m scared that I’m secretly gay and I don’t love her. When she came over we started making out and i got a boner and even leaked a little if you know what I mean. The whole time I was hard when she was over. But then when she leaves and I’m alone the thoughts start to come back and I pray but I heard that praying doesn’t do anything and people who were trying to pray to not be gay would still end up being gay. But before all of this I would always want to find a girlfriend and I even like this one girl in my school who I would daydream about us together but now I don’t feel nothing to her. I’m also scared that in the future I’m gonna try to do gay sexual things with men to find reassurance or something.