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anyone with hocd have intrusive thoughts that say wife instead of husband? i want a husband so bad but my brain will always use the word wife in place of it. it’s scary bc i’ve been having this thought for so long it feels “natural” now but i know that’s not what i want

When I look at my bf, I find him very cute etc but sometimes I dont feel anything… which I know is normal because you cant feel everything at every moment in your life… but the thing is everytime I think about us breaking up or him disappearing from my life, I feel like hes the “last” guy im ever gonna be with and then I’ll only be with women. Like whatttt?!?!? Whyyy?!

Im a Catholic and therfore I have scrupulosity too. Im a man and I cant live with my thoughts regarding sexuality. I find women attractive and I know that is the most normal thing in the world but somehow I dont know when or if it becomes a sin. I cant even look properly around when I am in public because everywhere might be a possibility for sin. I know that I cannot prevent any coincidences but I want those feelings to stop. Is there anything I can do?

hello all im a male 26 kinda new to dealing with this. for as long as i can remember i used to really stress out about my health and if i was ever sick i would assume the worst ang google symptoms of everything multiple times a day. i was extremely afraid of throwing up as a kid which i think plays a roll in ocd recently i watched a tv show that affected my overthinking and cause me to spiral out. thats when the SOOCD started to happen, growing up i always was with women and dated women and still dating women i never had these thoughts until 6 months ago i now feel uncomfortable around other men, i dont like to make eye contact and im always checking for a groinal response or sensation in my body when i watch tv or out in public. its affecting my daily life and i dont know where it all came from. i get intrusive thought daily could be a made up situation or a image of something i saw on the internet.

I hate it so much because I'm not homophobic but I just don't want a y if this. My whole childhood and up to before this started I was disgusted by gay porn I never thought it was wrong it just wasn't for me and I was obsessed and loved the idea of being with a woman sexually. I've only crushed on women irl and only wanted to be with women the most towards a guy is I've found them aesthetically handsome but never wanted sex or crushed on them. When I check gay porn now I feel arousal but in my stomach I feel pain because I don't want it or like it. When I get arousal towards women I feel good, butterflies I want to do it in real life and I seek out a romantic and sexual partner I just don't get it why am I getting arousal response when I don't actually like it or want to do it in real life? It's so uncomfortable and depressing I feel like I'm losing myself cuz being straight has always been a big part of my identity and loving women.

i saw videos on tiktok that people who would pray would end up being gay and i have been praying everyday that i don’t end up gay. I don’t want to be gay but i’m scared that i’m gonna end up changing my mind. What do i do?

I’ve gotten alot better but the past week has been hard. I ended things with this guy who I thought I really liked but he was seeing other people and I couldn’t take it. The cherry on top I had a panic attack and thought I was pregnant. I’m not. Now I’m back to thinking I’m a lesbian. I was talking to my aunt and mom about my future wedding and children and got excited. I feel like I’ll never feel attracted to another man again or never enjoy sex. And then seeking reassurance I went on the nocd page and read a story about a woman who had so ocd that turned out to be queer. And now I feel like this is going to happen to me. I also redownloaded tik tok and I keep getting videos about late bloomer lesbians. It feels like the world is telling me I am. Despite the feelings I just had for this guy I feel like I must be a lesbian and I’m just deeply in denial. It’s coming back and I feel like my attraction to men has always been forced.

Am I lesbian or it’s just hocd and libido issues? I (F29) don’t feel desire to have sex with my boyfriend (M32) and I am scared it’s because I am lesbian. We are together 3 years and we are also living together. I think I am more aroused by lesbian porn and lesbian fantasies than straight stuff and sex with men. I always dated men and I felt drawn to them, I also never wanted to be with a woman in real life and I was never attracted to a woman in real life, but I am scared I am just in denial and didn’t know about it or I always knew but didn’t want to accept the truth :-(. It’s not that I never wanted to have sex with men, but when the relationship starts to be serious the desire decreases. I really don’t know what to do. I love my boyfriend and don’t want to break up with him. It’s not a new topic for me. I deal with it already 4 years. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder 5 years ago, because I had panic attacks and some health ocd. After one year I started to be scared that I am a lesbian. I had a therapy and I talked about it with my therapists and they said it’s ocd, but I didn’t tell them the whole true about the porn and fantasies. In my country (Poland/Germany) the therapists are mainly familiar with health or harm ocd, so I don’t know if my therapists were familiar with these kind of thoughts. Also sometimes I think that even if it’s ocd it doesn’t mean it’s not truth. The only difference is that I am just more worried, scared and obsessed about it than other people who are questioning their sexuality. Also I even don’t know if it’s still ocd. It feels more like denial right now. Like I know the truth, but I just don’t want to accept it or I try to convince myself that for example it’s normal in long term relationship to not desire sex but the truth is it’s not normal if it happens all the time. I don’t really have ocd symptoms right now. At the beginning I was very scared and had to google all the time etc., but right now I just have pretty normal life. I am just still worried about it and ruminate though right now I try to avoid the whole thoughts and feelings all the time. And this is exactly what the people call denial. Knowing the truth but avoiding it… I don’t know if i have still doubts. It’s more like I know deep down what is the truth but I still hope it’s not the truth and try to convince myself that it’s everything ok but it doesn’t work because I am just a lesbian :-( TL;DR - I have sex issues in my relationship. I don’t feel desire to have sex and I am looking for a solution how to change it. Hopefully it’s because ocd and I am not attracted to women.

Hey, well, this is my first time ever posting in here but I figured why not? I’ve been struggling with this issue for almost three months now and it’s been a constant battle, I guess I just really need some support, so almost a year ago now, I got in a relationship and I realized I may be Asexual since I didn’t really have any sexual desires towards my partner, starting late November though, I began to have these intrusive images in my head of us having sex. These thoughts have caused me a lot of anxiety and stress as well as depression. It’s weird, I know deep down in my heart I don’t desire any of that with her but the thoughts feel so real at times and sometimes that makes me feel like I want the thoughts. I’m pretty much lost at this point and don’t know if whether it is OCD or if I’m just in denial. The thing is, I don’t want to see her that way, she doesn’t want to ever engage in any sexual activity and I want to respect that and respect the decision we both made to never do so unless it’s to have a baby. I just feel a sense of doom I guess, I’m scared that I might like the thoughts when I don’t want to like them. I’d feel so much guilt if it isn’t OCD and it’s actually me, and the thought of that terrifies me. I hope every day it’s OCD.

Hi everyone, My therapist is not a fan of ERP, we are doing a compassionate based therapy and she really wants to get to the bottom of what is behind my OCD and core fears. However, we have been trying CFT for over a year and I am still struggling with CFT and day to day life. I am really keen to try ERP and she has said yes if I come up with suggestions. Would be very grateful for some ideas of good first ERP exercises for someone with SOCD and ROCD. Thanks in advance!

Would quitting my porn addiction help with hocd? I believe it's becoming a reassurance compulsion, as I go on to prove to myself I am straight by watching straight porn. But then I find myself noticing the dude and checking to see if I find him attractive. Which continues the cycle of continuing to try to prove I am not attracted. I've been struggling with hocd for about a year and a half, it's been Hell every second of it. I never had questioned my sexuality before this, not once and I had been obsessed with girls every since I started to notice them. I so badly want to find a nice lady and have a big family and the thought of being gay scares me so much. I just can't beat this thing. Maybe quitting porn is the answer? I am so drained from this fucking thing, I miss me before hocd, I'd give anything to go back to before this.

i started having hocd at age 12 but didn’t know what it was till this past year at age 15. i was convinced i was gay but also like knew i wasent. i thought grounal responses was being turned on so i pretty much convinced myself that’s what it was. now i’m scared i really am gay and am just in denial. please help me i only want boys and i don’t wanna be gay i just wanna be happy and normal. i have false attraction and false feelings and groinals and thoughts and i want my attraction to men back

I feel my heart break when I think of losing my bf, I still feel a small part of me want him but now everything is pointing me just being lesbian. I’m convinced now that I only like being w him because of the male attention😭thinking of being lesbian and being w women doesn’t feel like desire at all like how lesbians describe it, but it feels so real and part of me just wants to give up and break up with him and just give in to this :( I get a lot of anxiety now thinking about being w men and feels like there’s no other way to explain this. I know it’s seeking for reassurance but it feels so hard to bring myself back from this to even say “maybe maybe not”. I just need some advice :(

I’m getting Groinal around my own brothers, when I saw his stomach. I don’t know if it’s groinal I hope it is, it even felt like it grew a little and I was stopping it. And then “if this was another guy you would definitely like it”. I try say “if I was actually gay I wouldn’t have dumb thoughts like this” but it doesn’t work my mind says I’m gay anyways

How can I come to terms that I might never know my sexual orientation for sure? I keep telling myself that maybe I’m straight, maybe I’m not, doesn’t matter, and it helps me for some time. But then my mind still latches onto needing to figure this out. I just can’t understand how I can be so sure of everything else about myself (or at least feel very sure and it all feels right), but with this topic I feel like I will never know and it makes me so depressed… I also always wonder how others without OCD can be so sure or not care to know 😭 it feels almost disingenuous not to try to figure yourself out

Thing is that i'm OBSESSED with a girl, i think about her all day and i hate this, i love My boyfriend, but she appears everywere and un everything, Even in unrelated things, She's a classmate and it's the third time i have an HOCD obsession with her, it makes me think and tried to make me believe im really in love with her, to also make me think i'm gay and makes me feel as if i don't want to be with my bf anymore, when i really love him and this actually started when i was scared of my bf falling in love with her.. i don't know what to do anymore, because Even if i Say i don't like her, it feels as if i'm lying, and also feels that i don't like My bf anymore which makes it Even MORE real, is this OCD? It feels like denial, but after the first 2 OCD obsessions with her i kept going with my normal life and loved My bf normally (Even tho i still had HOCD), pls answer:( i'm not gay, also, it came back because she cut her hair and now uses glasses, which i thought she looked cute or good in, but was scared of my boyfriend liking her, then it turned into, what if i liked her to directly thinking i'm in love with her (which i'm not and saying that made me anxious)..PLD READ I NEED ANSWERD :(

Today I watched a podcast that I thought would help me with HOCD but actually stressed me out even more. I can’t stop overthinking things I did in the past, how I didn’t mind it or stop it, analyzing past thoughts that could be “signs”, and convincing myself that I am in denial. I even have thoughts that if I just accept this then everything will be okay however when I get that thought I get scared because I have a girlfriend I truly love, even though I’m confused with my feelings and emotions I know that I’ve always loved her. I’m extremely scared that I’ll end up just finding out I’m gay and it’s almost like I already know the answer but won’t admit it. I really don’t know how else to explain it but it’s causing a lot of sadness and stress. Is this common for anyone else out there?

Hello, so my biggest problem and possibly the biggest gate from me escaping Hocd is well, false attraction. So the feelings and thoughts I get get 100 percent of the time aren't sexually(don't get groinal responses, never in my life and still to this day don't want to have sex with dudes or see them naked. Nor romantical thoughts really(il get images but I kind of identify it as,"if I liked them, I would keep it going, like I romanticize about women before hocd") but the physical feeling is what's messing me up. its like now 60 percent of dudes I see attractive now, and I dont want to be attracted to them. it just feels now like physical attraction or emotional attraction, i keep getting the urge to look at them and i feel like idk how to explain like tense or some feeling that i cant explain maybe? and what sucks is when I try to say,"its Just HOCD, you never felt like this," and now i get doubts or it feels like i did get these thoughts. I'm just asking if this is just hocd again because it feels very real, and what sucks is Ido if I have distress or anxiety feeling anymore

4 years ago I had hocd with a girl classmate, I was scared of being gay and like her, not so long ago my ocd came back, that thought came back and then changed to another girl, now AGAIN came back, because he changed her style and now have glasses, I can accept she looks pretty, but it started when I was scared of my boyfriend falling in love with her, now I think about her constantly like, having the need to be better than her, I hate this I don't have life, it started today because I dreamed about her chasing my bf.. I want my bf to see that I am in fact prettier and better than her but then, my hocd just comes and tells me it's me who is in love and in denial.. I hate this, I love my boyfriend, I'm not gay and I don't like her.. help does someone knows what's happening???!!?

Haven’t tested myself in a week maybe now my mind is trying to see if I like it now what do I do