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Anyone else suffering from guilt and shame from sexual things they did as a kid when they didn’t know any better. And if so how do you cope with it I really need help thx

Has anyone else had thought where you feel like you're constantly upsetting the other person? I truly want my life back.. I feel like im going crazy quite honestly, but also, any thoughts of jealousy for no reason? Even tho you know for a fact no one would cross or cheat on you ?

does anyone else feel their ocd gets so much worse at night or even when it gets dark?

hi everyone, im new to this therapy & it has been really daunting leading up to getting help. I’ve been struggling immensely with emetophobia for my whole life, but it has taken a huge toll on my life within the last year and a half. my emetophobia has progressively transitioned into agoraphobia and I can’t ever leave my room. just this last day was my last straw, when my roommate came home with the norovirus. he’s not very considerate when it comes to staying clean and quarantining so my head has been spiraling wondering when or if I’ll get it too. i haven’t slept in 3 days & haven’t eaten & I feel that im inducing more harm to myself. I just want to feel better, not worry so intensely. I want to live a normal life without restricting my meals or restricting public places & constantly asking my boyfriend for unfortunate reassurance that I’ll be okay. I really hate to be that girlfriend. if anyone sees this, I really hope that I do get better & that if anyone struggling with the same obstacle as me can get through it. it’s draining, it’s daunting, & so much for one to handle.

I feel so down right now for no reason and I feel guilty feeling bad about my well-being because some peace are dealing with wars and cancer and my pain isn't half or real compared to their pain but I can't take it anymore and I feel uncomfortable going to therapy and my family is broken my dad is abusive and mom and brothers don't really care I don't have any friends that they could help but OCD getting me crazy by signs I think I am seeing and I can't get help cuz my ocd tells me if I find happiness something bad may happen to my family so this is why I can't find a solution sorry for the long post I just feel so lonely right now I just want to fade away

Is anyone else scared that when they pee the particles get on you, you can only wear clothes once bc u fear u got poop or pee on them and ur scared u drip and leak. I’m a college student and living in a dorm w ocd is extremely mentally draining especially having to hide it from my Roomate. She knows I have ocd but not the extent. I had PANDAS as a kid and never lost the ocd. I get scared I pee myself when I wake up sweating or wake up having to pee. I hold it in for as long as I can and usually I only wear clothes until I have to use the bathroom bc once I go I’m scared I got urine on them. And TMI but discharge is a whole other story. This may sound crazy but I keep dove soap open by me and wherever I think there’s something I dab some on the spot and that makes me feel better. I’m starting to see a therapist at school so hopefully she can help with this but it’s really stressful. Having this type of OCD in a dorm is rlly hard😅

this is something ive been struggling with for a long time but didnt realize it was also another part of my ocd until yesterday. i tried googling to see if theres a name for it. the only thing that comes up is Moral Scrupulosity but thats not really what i struggle with. anyway, social media is making my ocd go absolutely haywire and its a similar feeling to how i felt in 2020-2022. going online makes me feel like im this horrible person while i see others posting things like “if you dont do ____ then ur ugly/a horrible person/etc”. do you guys have any methods on how to deal with this? one of my solutions im gonna do soon is completely log off on certain social media sites to help ease the mental anguish.

In my past relationship that lasted for years, I so many obsessive thoughts and intrusive thoughts that I listened to like “you don’t really love him. You’re just pretending”. I told him when I would have these thoughts and I could tell that this was not helping our relationship when I would tell him, but the compulsions felt better when I did it. We eventually broke up, and even though he swore it was not because of my ocd, I can’t help but think that I scared him. Flash forward two years and I’ve met this other man. I am worried that my intrusive thoughts about relationship worries will get the best of me and I will end things before they even get good. I think I am more prepared for this time but I’m still worried. I wish I could just stay in the moment and not catastrophic everything.

what is your experience? Weed helped me realize i also had an OCD diagnosis along with my AuDHD. Weed was an enhancement drug for me and I notice that it increased my intrusive thoughts BUT only when i was already in a state of anxiety while sober. If i was happy then obsessive thoughts of joy and ruminative yet this only when i smoke the strain sativa. When i smoke indica my thoughts slowed down more, but so did everything else. For me indica affected my body more. But in moments where my mind couldn’t even move to get up or used the restroom. Only in bliss would i be able to fall asleep. I want to journey on Weed with this App so if you’d like to join ! Feel free :D I can also go on to make another post how it affect my autism and my adhd.

I just am so sick of constantly battling my mind it’s so fucking annoying like what’s even the point of spending anymore time on earth if non existence is preferable to existence. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD but more obsessions than compulsions it’s really more of a mental fight than anything psychical although I do have a bit of that contamination OCD. I’ve tried the SSRIs and I would 100% reccomend them to anyone who has OCD but it feels like there are too many triggers that force me back into that intrusive thought loop which is just hellish. Its really hard to imagine any sort of torture that could be worse than those thought loops genuinely hard to conceive of any torture even physically that could be worse than that. I have actually been doing much better recently but I really just can’t conceive of going back into another one of those fucking miserable intrusive thought loops again like I see the symptoms coming back and the feeling that I get before the intrusive thoughts start really really piling in has come back again. Idk just thought I should share my experience like anyone else who has this mental condition I feel really sorry for. Here’s something that I read I feel like was really important that I wanted to share with anyone else who has OCD “You are a sensitive person, so altruistic that you get worried by even having bad thoughts. Learn to be a bit more selfish, and fight for your own happiness. You truly deserve it!”

I was wondering if anyone else has dealt with OCD that revolves around food? For instance I’ve had an eating disorder from OCD for about 2 years now. I’m scared to eat food I’ve always eaten due to the fear of an allergic reaction. I also have a fear of my food being poisoned or laced with drugs. It makes it very hard for me to eat at times because I’ll have the symptoms of anxiety where my throat feels tight as if I can’t swallow or I’ll feel really panicked after I eat a fear food. Logically I know I’m not allergic to many of the foods I’ve ditched. It’s like my OCD clings to the fact others have allergies to things like peanuts & other foods. I used to be able to eat foods just fine and I love food! I just have so much fear of not having control once I’ve consumed something and that what if thought pops in. I believe all this stemmed from me trying an edible and it being one of the worst experiences ever. Felt like I was spiraling and not in control of anything. I even deal with extreme derealization/depersonalization and it feels so similar to the bad high. & I just get scared someone will lace my food just for the fun of it. So now when I eat I get scared even though logically I know my food is just food and I need it!! I’m doing much better than before, I eat even when I feel anxious too. I had stopped eating and drinking water due to my ocd tricking me (didn’t know I had ocd at the time, I thought my negative impulse fear based thoughts were intuition but they weren’t) and ended up in the hospital. I still have many fear foods that are actually very healthy that I need to start eating again. I am suffering from low iron due to not eating correctly from this fear. I’m on a iron supplement though and I’m eating better than I was. I’m just wondering if anyone else has or is dealing with similar?

Ugh I wanna cry. ERP therapy feels like torture. I know I need it but I wanna cry. I’m tortured

Hi guys! I'm actually doing pretty well lately but this obsession is sticking, and I don't like it. It's kind of sexual and disgusting so be warned. Basically, when I was 14, I was sitting next to my 7 sister and adjusting my pants. My hand accidentally slipped and pressed between my legs. It felt good, obviously. I knew then that doing sexual things around others was not okay, but for whatever reason, I subtly pushed my hand there again. I didn't do it again, and nobody saw, but it's so disgusting. I was next to my sister. And I was 14—that's a high schooler, a ninth grader. I should have known better by then. I know people always say there's no age to stop making mistakes, but this is about hard boundaries. It's incredibly inappropriate. I feel really bad about it and I genuinely think what I did was wrong, and that I deserve to—not go to jail, I don't think I'm a criminal or anything, but I deserve to be treated with disgust at least. I don't think this is forgivable. Am I overreacting? Please help me out, guys. Thank you!

Hey, So I was supposed to finish school in 2020 but Covid kinda messed that up so I graduated in 2021. I always had the plan to study nursing but with my OCD and the pandemic I opted to wait and take a sort of gap year. Fast forward to the present day with exception to a job or two here and there I have no career. I’m 21 unemployed and feel completely lost and isolated. I have no direction in life. OCD caused me to ghost all my friends in 2022, I have nobody except my dogs. Leaving the house to go to the shop gets more intense and scary each time I do it, my ocd is only getting worse

I am not educated that well with the different types of OCD. But being here opened me up to it all. I am struggling with intrusive thoughts and i can’t stop thinking of those thoughts until i physically feel ill or nauseous. I struggle with getting over things that has hurt me especially when I see the people who have hurt me the flashbacks always come. I am not sure if this is a form of OCD. I just can’t stop thinking of the certain thing and I feel as if I am self sabotaging myself when I have good things in-front of me because my intrusive overthinking thoughts will not stop.

I hate this I hate this I hate this..I just finished therapy and I couldn't even say the story right. Along with that my thoughts switch to my boyfriend being the intrusive thoughts and the ex being "the partner" LIKE NOOOOOO I want my boyfriend and I want to get rid of this girl in my head. I don't want to be gay, I don't want this ex..I don't ever want this ex I want my boyfriend I always wanted my boyfriend. Please I just want my boyfriend I don't wanna lose my boyfriend I don't want to be a cheater I don't want this ex. I was 13... JUST 13 WHEN I DID THAT MISTAKE THAT DOESN'T MEAN I WAMT THE EX. I blame my head it's so unfair.. first it told me I was gonna cheat on my boyfriend because of this friend of his...after spiraling and telling myself I would never do such thing to my lover, I was feeling great and oki knowing I would never EVER do that to my boyfriend..it made me remembered what I did when I was 13 thinking I was a cheater all along and quickly said "do you feel bad for the ex? Do you want the ex then? Should you go back? You should" like bro I just GOT OUT OF A HELL HOLE YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME. I only was feeling bad for my past mistakes that doesn't mean I want the person back. I don't want them back I was just scared of how that would change my now relationship slightly knowing what I did when I was a PRE TEEN. Now this person has become my intrusive thoughts and it has been worse than ever. I really don't want this ex ik I don't. It's just making me feel bad for this other person and telling me what to do. I don't want this ex. I just had a thought because I saw the ex account and it triggered me then a thought said "I wish I was with the ex like all the time" | felt panicked and it felt real. I just want my boyfriend Ryan he's better way better.

I don't think about other people a lot, and when I do it's usually OCD bad stuff. Gift giving times are the worst because I'm expected to go out and get people things, which is a really nice thing to do, but what if I get the gift wrong? I could ask, and that's ok, but why am I so against this gift giving? I find it so hard to give anything. Giving attention, giving love, feeling love. I'm so empty, and in this time I need to get people things to show that there's something in here when I'm just so selfish and nothing. I'm lonely, but I just want to keep to myself. I want to care and feel love but everything hurts and I'd rather go the full day not talking to anyone. This sucks. What's wrong with me. Why do people expect so much of me. Or is it just me? My mom pisses me off so much because she always makes me feel guilty for not being the perfect happy person so I can be pleasant for others and not a rude inconvenience. I'm tired of thinking. The only reason this is happening right now is because my life long friend that I'm not so close with now thanked me for a gift I never bought him. My mom probably gave it to him with my name on it, how nice. I feel bad for not gifting him anything for two occasions, and he gifted me something really nice, but we're so different now. Times have changed, we're far apart, I have other friends, sometimes he says things that makes me uncomfortable. He's going through it, so I stick around to give him someone to talk to, but we just aren't close anymore and I don't know if I can be close. What am I? What is this? Why is this happening?

Has anyone else been in therapy for over a year and still struggling?

i don’t want to be gay as i’ve always imagined life with a husband and have been attracted to guys since elementary. i don’t think i had any ocd tendencies before this. i just woke up one day and was like what if im not straight. i just want to know for sure if i am. does this sound like ocd

Does anyone else have mental rituals to check whether your friends still have u on social media and if they don’t then they hate you? I have to check multiple times a day that they still follow me , even people I haven’t spoke to in years . Today one unadded me from a private story even though I haven’t spoke in over 2 years but now it’s triggered me and made me feel like they hate me and I’ve done something wrong. Could anyone offer advice on how to feel in a situation like this. Like should I be panicked and concerned? Thanks