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Hey if anyone is struggling with this do you have any tips because I really need some support right now ,Thankyou:)

This is a crazy one, buckle up and get ready to read. I have an account on a website called Nationstates. It's a text-based browser game where users create their own fictional countries. One of the more creative things you can while managing your country is creating a Factbook, which is where you put written lore for your nation in so people can learn more about it and be entertained. I was writing a section in my nation's history where a civil war ended with a final battle in a big city that was being torn apart by explosions, fighting, and shooting. With all that chaos, it was conjuring imagery of similar fictional events like the Purge, or even real events like the 1970s NYC Blackouts and stuff. My OCD kicks in right here, by trying to associate my writing inspiration with real life events that had horrible outcomes or lots of deaths, therefore making it "bad taste" or "cursed" for me to be writing "something about those events", even if they have no connection whatsoever or we're not inspired by such things at all. My OCD be like, "Oh, you're basing it off of the (insert violent riot event in real life with atrocities being committed), your work is now cursed and allowing it to exist will invite bad things to happen to you." OCD: "So you have to delete your work, and anything you created after it to protect yourself." As someone who wants to go into graphic design and other creative work, this type of OCD is DEVASTATING. Especially when your brain decides to randomly connect your current project with something that is already rumored to be cursed in real life, like the unreleased Beach Boys song about fire that supposedly caused a building to burn down after it was played. My brain associated THAT for some reason just because I was writing about a city in chaos (so presumably there'd be fire involved, I guess.) So my brain told me that if I posted the work without editing out the city battle sequence, I'd risk my house randomly catching fire because of the curse between now and even to the distant future. I tried to ignore it and post the work, then I went on and posted more works. I told myself that if the nagging got unbearable and I was convinced that it was a "real omen", I'd delete everything I made after it as well as the OG work. Unfortunately, I'm in school now, and the manifestation covered my schoolwork. Thing is, once I turn in schoolwork, I can't retract it for obvious reasons, unlike my art. I don't want to delete my art since I made some really good content and I'm trying to set a benchmark against my OCD. I don't want to destroy my work again like I did on my birthday. And no, my OCD says I'm not allowed to copy the text and paste it later, it must be obliterated completely and redone from the ground up, and that stuff took me HOURS to write. But I need to turn in my schoolwork, and the paranoia is hitting hard. Even if I turn it in and nothing happens shortly afterward, the curse has me thinking that it will follow me around my entire life. My brain is convinced that it's an omen. I distract myself by procrastinating and playing video games or something, but it hurts me with anxiety. I'm in pain and I need help. I can't tell what's real and what fake anymore.

Hey everyone ..... I feel that OCD makes you doubtful and scared of so many things Maybe we can share some tips on this thread to help each other be less afraid.?

Is anyone else doing acceptance therapy? It's only been 2 rounds of it but I feel like it's bs and only makes me more scared.

I struggle a lot with real event OCD, to the point where the ruminating interferes with so much of my daily life. I constantly think about past mistakes I have made, and my mind acts like the entire world knows about them. For example, I think of the entire world “canceling” me for my past mistakes that I deeply regret. I have gotten to the point where I believe that all of these mistakes have been caught on camera or secretly recorded. I feel like I can never be successful in life due to this fear that all my past mistakes will be exposed. When so many public figures and “regular people” get exposed by our society for mistakes they have made, it makes me feel like I will be forever known for the worst mistakes I have ever made. When I think about being “exposed” for these mistakes, I imagine that everyone will resent me and endlessly criticize me online. My intrusive thoughts then make me believe that taking my life would be the best solution if this happens. I believe that is the only way out, because I would not be able to handle it if people actually know about what kind of horrible things I have done. When I do get so anxious about my past mistakes, I use the thought of suicide as a way to provide a solution if my mistakes get exposed. AKA I think that there is a way to avoid everyone hating me for my mistakes & the only way I can express how bad I feel about these mistakes is by taking my life. Does anyone else struggle with Real OCD to this extent? Have their been things that have helped make it better for you?

I don’t want to be with men but my head is convincing me that I was romantically attracted to my friend I really don’t want to be with men I really don’t I hate it, please someone help me and give me advice :( I don’t wanna do this anymore.

Does anyone get worrying intrusive thoughts about being a p*** when they've seen a p*** video about someone they find attractive but don't know their age? What if they aren't of age, does that make you a horrible person and a p***?

i literally can’t stop with my brain saying i don’t like women on repeat. it feels like if i say it constantly it’s like i’m in denial and that gives me anxiety sometimes but most of the time it doesn’t. i’m scared. i’ve also fallen back into the hard cycle of obsessively researching in google trying to find answers. i feel less anxiety and groinals but it feels like denial. it sometimes feel like i have to think about something sexual bc i’m so used to it now. i hate this so much. i want this to end. i can’t even afford therapy rn i have to push my appointment further bc i have no money right now i just started working. if anyone can give me just ANY advice that would be great. please.

I am having a hard time today. I struggle with ocd especially over Christianity. I feel so alone because I've annoyed everyone in my family about it that they don't want me to bring it up anymore. I just want someone to talk to, another Christian to talk to who knows what I'm talking about.

Got into some trouble back in June. I prayed and acted on other compulsions because I was so scared, and hired someone to help with the circumstances. My OCD truly took over and I no longer felt like I was a trustworthy person, that I didn’t deserve my job, and even that people were watching me through my phone and computer. About a month ago I received a call saying that everything was gonna be okay and that, in all honesty, my best case scenario had come true. When I heard this I relaxed, and was so incredibly relieved, that my symptoms had lessened dramatically as I knew I could just move on from what happened. The OCD symptoms didn’t go away completely of course, but they no longer consumed me and I felt like I was able to function again. Anyways, yesterday I received a letter in the mail basically saying that the incident has been brought up all over again and I feel myself spiraling. The person who is helping me assured me this is nothing to freak over and I’m definitely making a bigger deal than it is in my head, but I’m so scared. I feel the OCD taking over all over again. I feel like I made a mistake letting myself “relax” this past month. My brain keeps wondering if there’s something else I did bad in this one month period, and as silly as it sounds, I feel like if I didn’t watch certain TV shows or things like that this wouldn’t have happened. I keep wondering what compulsion I didn’t do to make this happen. I don’t know what to do. I’m pretty much a sitting duck for another two weeks. I’m wondering what I can do to “make things right” even though, realistically I know there’s nothing I can do. Please help. I keep having panic attacks and don’t know where to turn. I thought this chapter of my life had closed and it’s been such a strainer on my mental health. I hate myself for what happened, and I feel like I’ve punished myself enough. I’m really angry at the person who called me telling me everything was A-OK just to send me that letter in the mail. I’m frustrated because I feel like I let my guard down. I thought this was over. Why isn’t it over? What did I do wrong that’s making it drawn out like this?

every time my OCD finds something new to obsess about I feel like it’s the worst one yet. I used to think feeling like i don’t love my partner is the worst but turns out feeling like i cheated on him is so much worse. especially because it’s not cheating OCD but real event OCD. I somewhat entertained things with a friend a couple years ago (assumed he was probably into me and didn’t stop it/ liked the attention??) and even drunkenly fell asleep on his leg once. and i have talked about it with my bf but not the detail about sleeping on his leg (i’ve told him other arguably worse things (no kissing or anything like that)) and we’ve gotten past it. this was someone who i definitely never had feelings for and never wanted anything more out of than attention. but now i feel overcome by guilt and anxiety and i replay the scenarios over and over in my head. i feel the constant need to confess every last detail i remember but i read that confessing can be a compulsion? ugh anyone else dealing with real event OCD have any advice? I can’t see my amazing NOCD therapist anymore due to insurance issues :/

I’m at a point where I’m so sick of the anxiety that my brain just pulls out scenarios with other people and my brain is just quick to want to leave my current relationship, yet at the same time I acknowledge how poor of a decision that would be. There’s nothing wrong in my current relationship, we are each others best friend and that’s all I’ve ever wanted in a relationship, yet my mind still thinks otherwise and a part of me likes the fake scenarios that my mind comes up with. Who says this won’t happen in another relationship I’m in, especially since I love the qualities of my partner. I force myself to think about him and only him. It feels like I no longer care, but I want to care. I want to be present in my relationship, and whenever I try to pursue it, my brain goes “you don’t want to” and it’s such a horrible cycle. I just want this to end, I want to see the person that I have right in front of me.

Hey guys I’ve been doing very well in terms of managing OCD but recently I’ve been having this intrusive thought of what if the cops arrest me for my Google search history. I used to feel what i now recognize as a huge sense of responsibility to protect children from cp and would Google cp into the search bar and on p*rn sites to report to cybertip. I’ve only done the latter once or twice but now I’m obsessively anxious about thinking of what if the cops check my computer, whether it looks like I have intent to watch etc. Please advise :(

How do i rlly know it’s ocd? I had one thought and it was a bad thought. A thought that used to be a frequent ocd intrusive thought for me but this time came up in the middle of an argument w my sister who I care for more than anyone in the world. It came up at a time when my ocd had been better. And it only came up for one episode so it hasn’t felt as obsessive, which makes me think it may not be ocd and that I’m actually just horrible. What’s becoming obsessive now is the guilt I feel for having that awful thought. So much guilt. I feel unworthy of anything good.

Can someone please help! Basically , I can’t get over a comment one of my ‘friends’ made about my boyfriend ages ago. We were out in town and she said ‘ the reason your boyfriend isn’t going out with you is because you’re pretty and he’s just average and doesn’t want to be seen out with you’ and to be honest it really hurt me what she said. She obviously didn’t know about my ROCD and I think if she knew the severity of her comment she wouldn’t have said it , but I cut contact with her because the comment had really hurt me:( I can’t get over what she said , and my ocd brain holds on to it so much , most people tell us how great we look together , I’ve asked family members and they said they don’t understand why she would say that because they think he’s good looking but the comment brings me down even though I know I shouldn’t care . Another ‘friend ‘ told me a similar thing once saying I could do better , but I don’t understand because he’s very attractive ?

Is ERP hard ? I've seen a lot of posts which say that doind ERP is hard . I don't find it that way . Am i doing it right ? Whenever I set out to do ERP I find out that I don't get as triggered as I do on a normal basis . It seems as though being prepared to resist my compulsion lessens the trigger a lot ( about 1_3 on the scale ) does anyone else feel this way ?

Can anyone else relate to false memories after having a night of drinking. My obsessions are around sexual harm ocd. I can’t stop replaying a certain event from 3 years ago and now a new one has popped up in regard to my 7 week old son. I’m not a bad person and I think I know deep down I haven’t done anything bad. My family also tell me I haven’t as I always ask for reassurance. Has anyone ever had any bad episodes after alcohol. If so what and how did you cope ?? I’m struggling right now. I’ve recently been seen by a psychiatrist but I’m not sure he specialised in ocd. However he did tell me it sounded like a anxiety disorder and a anxiety disorder.

For those practicing erp whether it be with a therapist or by yourself, how do you just sit with the anxiety/uncertainty? I've been trying, but it's extremely hard because I know what is true about myself even though my brain is trying to convince me otherwise. How do you guys get through eerp without it just sounding like you're confirming the thoughts?? I'm struggling here.

My POCD and real events OCD is calling me a P, a chomo, and a r*pist for the horrible real events when I was 13… I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a chomo...  I didn’t realize how horrible the real events actually were… I was 13 at the time… now I’m 20… my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events… while my mom reassures me all the time that it’s all over, that it’s not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I’m not a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someone’s similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they m*lested and that they needed  to turn themselves in… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… i didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t… and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future… I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13….. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids…  I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… And it’s comparing me to actual P’s and chomo’s who did stuff from 12-15… and making me think I’m a P and a Chomo because of it… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… 😭😭😭 and I get intrusive thoughts of people calling me a P and a chomo and me getting arrested… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo… the real events happened only 3 times and I really didn’t know how horrible it was… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… I don’t want to ever be attracted to or harm kids in any way… 😭😭😭  It’s making me feel like I know I’m a P or a chomo when I don't ever want to ever be those things… I perform avoidance compulsions all the time and I don’t want to be anywhere around kids… even accidentally standing next to one makes me feel incredibly uncomfortable and anxious… it’s making me feel like that I know I’m what my POCD and real events OCD are telling me even when a former ocd psychiatrist has told me that I was a child, and that I didn’t have an adults “sexual understanding or responsibility. So, you can see why you didn't realise the horribleness of an event until you matured. So now, in the present, you know yourself to be a good moral person. It allows you to let go of the past…” and that the real events don’t make me a P or a chomo… In addition it’s making me feel like I’m what my ocd tells me that I am… I didn’t know how horrible the real events were at the time when I was 13… I really didn’t… my POCD and real events OCD keeps calling me a P and a Chomo for what happened when I was 13 when I didn’t know what any of that stuff was… I truly didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t…

I'm seriously starting to hate that my mind is going after the experience I had working with children in the summer. I never wanted that job in the first place because of things exactly like this. I remember stupid intrusive thoughts popping up even while I was at the job. It kept targeting one kid with the most sickening thoughts that I honestly don't even want to type out and most times when I saw that kid I was just disturbed at times and uncomfortable. Now that it's over and I'm not dealing with it anymore it's trying to convince me of things that are flat out horrible and sick that I don't want to be true even though it feels like it is What makes this worse is that I'm someone who struggles with p*** addiction and occasional lusting makes this so much fucking worse. I really can't stand that I deal with this yet it's still hard to let go of. The sexual thoughts are what make intrusive thoughts worse than any other kind