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Anyone have success with medication. I need to get on something as I’ve been so crippled with the physical symptoms of anxiety. I need some hope and advice!

Hi! I am genuinely so happy and attracted to my boyfriend but cannot stop having extreme anxiety trying to figure out my sexuality. Some days I think I am sexually attracted to women and other days I don’t feel this way. How can I accept the uncertainty? Another part of this OCD is I obsess over what the queer community will think of me since I have limited experiences with women. I am so happy with my partner but the OCD is keeping me in fear of missing out. I keep constantly comparing myself to others and getting down that they have had more sexual partners. Seeing if I’m alone in this.

Hi, I'm 17 and I'm not sure if I have OCD My symptoms started in lockdown and I was really scared my parents would get covid and something really bad would happen so: I kept praying to God, taking my shoes off to pray again and again before I left to go somewhere In my religion(Hinduism) materialistic things are ignorance so I'd balance my phone in a risky position and pray everyday --- then I thought that by sacrificing materialistic things (ignorance) like chocolate and music I could go to my dream uni ---then I kept thinking about my mum and I kept thinking she might get cancer so I kept sacrificing things like wearing make up, nice clothes and I kept limiting how much food I ate. I 'fasted' a lot and I prayed for an hour every night. I thought I would regret it so much if I wore make up because id suffer from the ignronave of the materialistic pleasures When I was eating,I would keep looking at a picture of Lord Krishna and swallowing really fast to avoid the materialstic pleasures of taste. I can only do some things by thinking 'i promise to god I'll eat this chocolate' for example. I don't think my symptoms are normal and I really don't know what to do.

I was sick for a week like two weeks ago and I sneezed a lot in my room. I have an idol of God on my desk (I'm Hindu), but every time I sneezed, I did not sneeze in the direction of the idol and I sneezed in my elbow. After I stopped being sick and today, I washed my sheets and sanitized the electronics and things that were around me when I sneezed. However, my OCD is convincing me that the sneeze particles traveled to the idol and contaminated it with "negative energy." And I ran out of tissues and I can't clean the idol and it feels like the idol is contaminated. But I'm trying to justify it by saying I sneezed in a different direction. And if I sneeze in the future, does that mean I have to clean the idol each time (that's how I'm trying to rationalize not cleaning the idol) But I feel so anxious like I have to clean the idol and idk what to do

so I’ve been dealing with ROCD for a hot minute and I guess it decided to switch to HOCD. I went to a women’s soccer game and I feel like I was triggered hella there (no judgement at all ) I met some new friends and there was this one particular girl that I thought I could actually be friends with bc she reminded me of my old friends back home and I just thought she was funny/ a good time. Fast forward to that night we all end up going out to a bar and we met up with our boyfriends. This girl didn’t have a man, I have no idea if she’s straight/bi whatever. I didn’t really talk to her throughout the night unless she was at the table with us , and then by the end of the night my boyfriend and I drove her home bc she was plastered plus some of our friends joined for the ride as well. While getting into the car she goes “omg ‘my name’ i feel like you’re playing cat and mouse with me” (idk why she would say this bc i literally would like mess with her or if she was dancing by me id dance too so idk where tf that came from) and my one friend was like “that sounds a little gay” AND WHEN I TELL YOU MY STOMACH DROPPED hearing that, it did. this happend on Friday and I have been thinking and ruminating “if I am secretly gay” “did she notice something in me that I haven’t noticed in myself” “did I talk to her in a flirty way that like made her think I was gay”. So alas, I am on here to find comfort bc now I don’t want to even see or hangout with this girl anymore and I’m like scared when I see her she’s going to say some dumb shit like this again. No judgment to anyone who is gay, and I know it’s not a problem to be gay or whatever but I know I don’t like girls lmfao.

Even though I know that an instrusive thought can be a thought that has become a compulsion and disturbs us, I cant just tell this to myself and move on. What I mean by move on is that I didn't say that just think that and forget about it, I mean like proces cuz its not easy. I can see the perspective of others when I read on this app and can tell that its ocd, but I cabt just tell myself and say that its an instrusive thought about this one thing. Or I can, but I also cant I cant explain it. For instance, Im telling myself it is but when it comes to writing it down here, it feels wrong because what if the thought is real. But if it hasnt still went away, it probably isnt a part of me right?. It might be ROCD. So I can try to tell about the thought without mentioning it because it feels like mentioning it will make things worse. from the moment I had it I have had this guilt feeling because I know Id never think that but it just came and makes me feel guilty even though its a thought that is the opposite of what Ive always thought, it always disturbs me and I feel guilty and like a betrayer for thinking such thing. Since I guess that I dont trust my thoughts I cant really help myself. Its not a severe thought right now but it used to be worse but it never went away. I feel like Ill always feel guilty about it my whole life and will never get over it. Even right now my mind is telling me not to write about it here because its just not good for me to not because it isnt in reality. And right now my mind is telling me that I cannot be sure that Im actually telling the right stuff, maybe Im just saying these to be saying it and it keeps going on. I always talk to an AI because I go to my psychiatrist once in a month and I left therapy. I just need reassurance...

I had a false memory real event ocd - situation that happened before that causes me great anxiety and stress. I had already talked with the community on this and now the memory came back and the guilt and doubt and anxiety came right back again

I made a post about this yesterday but no one responded My magical thinking ocd has got so bad All day I’ve been tapping my head a certain amount of times to make these thoughts go away I’m exhausted constantly having to tap my head Please am I the only one with this? Can people with magical thinking ocd tell me their experience because I feel like I’m lying

I cannot help but feel guilty for my partner having to deal with my changing emotions. The thought of they would be better off without me and I’d be better off alone were pretty high today. We got into a very silly fight today, leading to a lot of emotions and long conversation( ended up being a good convo, but also a hard one ). No matter the problem tho it sends me into a spiral about what I feel or if I even want this. I don’t mean to be like this, and I feel bad that my partner even has to put up with it. He has done his absolute best at understanding what I’m going through and 90% of the time works to talk me down - which no one has ever done -. It’s new to both of us. I just don’t know how to escape the guilt of him having to put up with my triggers and uncertainty… scared he will get fed up with it at some point and I don’t want to drag him through the mud due to my own issues: considering I also don’t know how to recognize or deal with it. just a rant or maybe if you have advice idek.. I assume some could relate

I can’t ever see children on tiktok without having intrusive thoughts, groinal responses, or freaking out if I glance at chest , bottom area. It sends me into a spiral. I can’t even watch the videos. Sometimes I force myself to watch as exposure and it freaks me out and is dreadful. sometimes if I glance at the wrong parts my brain tells me I looked there for a bad reason so I’ll look again to test myself to remind myself I am not attracted to children. This pocd stuff is horrible. I feel like a fraud. Who is hiding behind pocd.

So in high-school I had a great GPA and life was good but 12th grade is when my ocd kicked in I barely graduated and now I'm in college I bet all can guess how it's going 🙃 and my GPA has plummeted I do the work and go to class but it's never enough especially with ocd constantly ruminating and doing compulsive behaviors the tight anxiety feeling in my chest everyday every morning the times I wished I was dead because of ocd I don't know if I can bounce back from this I f%$#king hate ocd I don't know what to do

TW! So one of my old hobbies that I like to do was watch those really messed up shocker films. That's what kind of desensitized me to a lot of stuff that I used to draw. One movie that I happen to own on DVD (it was a gift) is the movie Salo'. And for those who have serious pocd that movie can be extremely triggering given the content in the film. Back then that movie really was nothing to me because to me it was just a movie. However I've been thinking about watching it again purely for exposure reasons however a little bit of my head is questioning it given what's the film has and of course the age of the actors in the film. I wonder if it would be a good exposure or maybe it's just not something to dive into again.

Hello this is my first time posting here sorry for the long post in advance I just have to speak on this. I am a 19 year old female, and my friend is also a 19 year old female. Last year my friend who was in rehab came to stay with me after I helped her leave because she would call me crying saying it was the worst place on the planet and asking for my help. So I asked my mom if it was alright for her to stay with us and to be completely honest I thought she would say no, however she said yes not realizing it would be such a long time. So she has been living with me since August of last year. I think I’ve started compulsively taking care of her. She has 2 traumatic brain injuries and severe PTSD and bipolar 2. Before rehab she lived with her wildly abusive parents (based solely off the things she’s said and one interaction where her mother made me let her go through my purse) and she used a shit ton of drugs and drank basically everyday. All that to say she’s basically clean besides vaping (which I hate) and weed because it is the only thing that helps her pain. But recently she’s been getting a bit worse because she went through a very bad breakup with someone she barley knew and she was told by my mom that she has till the end of this month to move out. Which I feel horrible about but my house already has 5 adults living in a three bedroom one bathroom house not built for 6 people and it’s destroying my mental wellbeing. To get to the point I’m worried caring for her has become a compulsion in the way that I feel like if I’m not constantly making sure she’s not spiraling or relapsing I’m worried someday I’m gonna wake up to one of her everyday hour long texts and it’s going to be a goodbye text. I feel immense amounts of anxiety when I speak to her even if it’s a good day. Oh and to make a quick note we are as opposite as it gets I’m an anxiety ridden introvert that hates drugs other than weed and she’s the complete opposite of that. I’ve also dropped like 2 of my only friend in part because of her not fully but slightly. I just feel so much regret when it comes to the entire situation and I feel like I permanently altered the way my brain thinks when it comes to my decisions. But I just can’t think of her living alone it brings me so much fear to think she won’t have the bodily autonomy she needs to be able to live a comfortable life. She’s tried so many times to commit suicide and they never went through and she doesn’t want to but people’s whose brains have been hurt like hers has are basically hard wired to want to die. I feel cruel for wanting her to live because I truly believe she can have a somewhat fulfilling life if she can get to that point I just can’t trust that someone will care for her the way I do but it like physically pains me. I get such bad anxiety I shake and tense up and my muscles hurt but I feel so bad even feeling like that because she feels so much worse on a daily basis. Like I can’t say anything without her reminding me how much pain she’s in and she does it because it’s the only way she knows how to relate to the world. I’m worried about what life will be like when she’s not here. I feel like I’ll never have a day of peace if I don’t know she’s alive. I don’t really know what I’m asking for here I just needed to voice this because if there is anybody who possibly understands I need to know.

Hello I'm in a bit of a situation here I met a girl in a gourp of ocd help on facebook last week She's cool and we started talking But everything escalated quickly She started to ask me for pictures of me smiling And asking a lot of information about me Yeah nothing so bad Just getting to know each other We get to the point of sending nudes And idk I discovered Well she told me she's addicted to alcohol and Xanax And she started acting really weird Obsessive She got mad if I didn't answer Manipulative Today she took a big dose of Xanax just because I didn't answer her message And this is scaring me I don't know how to get out of this situation I feel scared and abused She studied laws I mean probably there's no way she would do anything against me But also I'm worried if I leave her she'd commit suicide or something

Just curious. It could be about anything.

Its my birthday but im not celebrating😔 why celebrate when things just keep getting worse for me im not happy at all😐

Hi my name is Audrey and this app was recommended to me to join a community with others who have OCD. I want to share my story and I think the best way to do that would be to share my college application essay. I wrote about my OCD journey and I think it sums it up well. Here it is: One of the main debates in grammar is the use of the Oxford comma. Some people strongly believe that you must use the Oxford comma when completing a list, and some people question its very existence. Where do I stand? I love the Oxford comma. But not because I am some big grammar-police, but because I have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and I feel a need for symmetry in my life. My whole life I have always loved when things were symmetrical. If I scratched my right arm, I scratched my left arm too; if I stubbed my left toe, I would purposely stub the right one too; I would line all of my pencils up in a perfect row. I felt a deep need to keep everything symmetrical. So when the debate over the Oxford comma first came to my attention, I, of course, was in support of it. Two commas between three items, nothing seemed more perfect to me. I could not fathom why anyone would not love the Oxford comma. I just always thought everyone's brain worked like mine. That was until I was diagnosed with OCD. I never knew other people didn't think and process information like I did. I never knew how my brain was "faulty" and different from others. When I first received my diagnosis, I felt like the odd pencil out of the row. I had spent my whole life making sure everything was equal and symmetrical, and it turned out that my brain was the unequal one. After my diagnosis, I started exposure therapy. And what did I do to work on my OCD? Well, I would move one pencil out of its row and stare at it until I physically couldn't anymore. I would only stub my right toe and wait while my brain practically screamed at me to stub the left toe. These exercises were hard and uncomfortable, but through therapy I learned to sit with discomfort and unevenness. Before therapy, one thing I struggled with was note-taking. I would write one word and then go back and “fix” the letters until my brain was satisfied, then do the same for the next word. It took twice as long and I would fall behind. I became stressed because I was missing half the notes and felt too embarrassed to ask the teacher to repeat. When I started therapy, this was one of my main issues I wanted to tackle. So, in our sessions, I would have my therapist talk about random topics and I would take notes. In the beginning, I would still go back and fix how I wrote each letter. But the more I practiced continuing writing no matter how uncomfortable my brain made me feel, the more I could write without going back and fixing my handwriting. In the past year, I have been able to take better notes faster than before. Now, I am confident that I will be able to follow along during lectures, and even understand concepts on a deeper level. As I’ve worked to confront my issues head-on, my cognitive flexibility has grown and the disruptive urgency that OCD creates has slowly diminished. My new ability to sit in discomfort has not only been useful with my OCD, but it has been useful in my day-to-day life. I am now able to live with unanswered questions, deal with the possibility that things will not always go my way, and tolerate my anxieties. I feel that these new qualities will serve me well in college and in life. OCD does not make my life better or make me perfectly organized, but it has taught me how to prepare for all of life’s challenges and adversities. But I must admit, despite learning how to tolerate things not being symmetrical, I still do love the Oxford comma. Maybe I am the grammar-police after all.

How do you deal with ocd and laundry. Sometimes I forget I put laundry detergent in. I fight my ocd and put the clothes in the dryer but then I freak out briefly that I didn’t put detergent in and ruined the dryer. I wish I could have a camera to record me putting detergent in. Also, does anyone battle washing something potentially contaminated with other clothing. What do you tell yourself to get over these irrational thoughts

Is this an OCD thing: just the general sense of worry or dread something bad may happen in the future? For example: planning a trip, and the thought "you could die by then!" Or something similar but related to loved ones?

Ugh did SOCD ERP watching gay porn and actually got off! Initially it has thrown me through a spiral but without reassuring myself, I realize porn is porn. Slowing coming down from a bad spiral and would just love some words of encouragement, not reassurance.