- Date posted
- 1y
I cannot quit thinking about a certain thing over and over. Its starting to affect my mental health and daily functions
Kickstart your recovery journey with a caring community of others
working to conquer OCD
I cannot quit thinking about a certain thing over and over. Its starting to affect my mental health and daily functions
I’ve dealing with this intrusive thoughts for a while, they predict the worst is about to happen, I was in a relationship with someone for 7 years he wanted us to get married and live together, but my intrusive thoughts will tell me that it will not work because in his house I will have to be by his rules and his kid’s rules, also my sister lives with me and will think worry about my sister, me not being around to help her with het daughter, but qt the same time I’m suffering because I feel that I love him 🥲 I feel hopeless.
I’m going on a hen do in 3 weeks to Marbella for 3 nights. I’m a bridesmaid but don’t know the other girls very well apart from the bride. I feel sick at the thought of going which makes me really sad as I should be looking forward to it. It’s the first time I’ve left my little boy and along with the soocd etc I’m really dreading it. It’s not like a fear like scared of an exam or scared of jumping out of a plane it’s a sick to my stomach don’t know how I’m going to force myself to go kind of dread and I feel like I could cry just at the thought of it …this isn’t normal someone please help me how I prepare myself as I’m so worried of feeling like Ill need to jump straight on a plane back as soon as I get there 😔😔😔
Ever have the feeling of “I’m never getting better, I might as well quit if OCD is gonna be with me forever, louder and bigger than me or not.”And in turn, you sit in that feeling of sadness and failure yet in a way it’s comforting cause you don’t have to do anything anymore? That’s me right now. I hit these moments of giving up or losing faith in myself often. I get back up one day, I know I will and can…but when I do, sometimes I feel like a fraud. As if I’m tying to convince or gaslight myself it’ll get better when I can’t really see much change myself. And if there is change, it doesn’t last long. You gotta keep practicing it as techniques start working but for some reason I slip up and ruin the progress and process each time. I go back to the compulsions, I go back to letting the intrusive thoughts make me feel awful and afraid to do anything, I go back to hating myself, my brain, and my life. There’s a strange comforting feeling in quitting and doing nothing, somehow though. I’m not sure why, exactly. I guess it’s familiarity after leaving that old routine? Maybe just not trying and hurting my brain is why it feels toxically nice. I’m not sure.. I don’t really need advice but I welcome it. But I would like to know if I’m not alone in this?
I am doing a lot better! I don't get as much anxiety but I still really try to figure out if I'm gay or not. It makes me want to cry. I also feel like bc l'm not getting anxiety it means that it's not ocd. So I am also trying to figure out if I do have ocd. I started therapy thru here which is exciting. My therapist asked me about different exposures I could do and I really can't think of any that will make me mildly anxious. She had me repeat the phrase "I am gay" for a minute and I felt like my anxiety was really low making me think the ERP doesn't work bc it's not ocd. We have a couple of exercises that I know will make me very anxious but I'm not sure if I am ready for it. I also feel like I have gotten better without ERP so that means it's not ocd. I just want to know that this is OCD. It's funny bc my therapist told me it was but she knows I won't believe her. It's crazy how this works. If anyone had any advice I’d appreciate it
I’ve been diagnosed with OCD and GAD. I pick my skin to cope with this sense of impending doom, then become more anxious because I’m afraid I’ll get an infection through the wound so I immediately pour hand sanitizer on it. The burning sensation provides temporary relief and it’s like I can “feel” the microbes dying? Like idk how to describe it. I also get unwarranted thoughts of self harm. I’ll randomly be like “being dead is easier” or “I don’t deserve to be alive.” I just get so overwhelmed with the future and then my brain is like “you could unalive yourself.” I know there’s some overlap between both disorders so I’m just wondering if anyone else has similar experiences? I feel like even though I have a diagnosis and am on medication and have been in CBT that something is off.
Do you A. Just let yourself keep yawning and learn to not care B. Try to stop or suppress the yawning Trigger warning only because I don’t want all the Somatics to start yawning
I realised I did a bad thing when I was a kid ... I hurt one of my friend.. I didnt realised then what I did. I am ruminating constantly about it ... I cant get over it and I feel like I dont deserve to get over it. I keep ruminating and ask myself questions ... What should I do?
I'm scared I've become my thoughts or I think I'm scared, why does it feel like I genuinely want or like these thoughts. Anytime I remind myself it's OCD or that I don't like it, it feels like I'm lying to myself and that I've liked these thoughts. Please someone give me advice, I'd appreciate it
Am i not authentically straight if i choose to identify based on how i want to live my life and how i want to be attracted vs if i have attractions that fall into the category
What does depersonalization feel like? I’m not sure if that’s what I’m experiencing.
My pocd it's getting really bad again and I don't know what to do ... I am so scared .. I will go to therapy but Idk if I could talk about my intrusive thoughts...I am scared . Any advice?
90 a week like who can afford that It's also funny too because people with OCD shouldn't be getting in regular therapy but at this point I'm not sure I really have a choice. I'm struggling pretty bad. I have a lot going on and I really need to talk to a therapist. I love this app so much I feel like it's been so beneficial to me. I wish surprises were a little bit more friendly .
I came downstairs and I saw a picture of God and I thought I need to go and pray by just nodding my head in the general direction twice and putting whatever I was carrying on the table to show I don't want to choose materialstic things like my phone in was carrying. But I was so exhausted from spending 20 minutes praying upstairs so I just told myself 'promise on your dad's life to not put whatever your carrying down' so I didn't but then as I left I thought 'do this for 30 minutes' so I couldn't put my phone down for 30 minutes because I had accidentally promised too but I did it by accident and now I feel bad because wasn't it a promise on my dad's life? And then I sat down and I felt the urge to go and apologise to God for putting my phone down but then I quickly promised 'to not get up for 30 minutes' but then I FORGOT AGAIN and I feel so bad I don't know what to do. I was just exhausted because I had a really important exam and I need to start revising again for the next one. I don't even know if this is OCD or sounds like it.
i dont know if this falls under perfectionism ocd or not but i obsess over the way i look its used to be horrible i was diagnosed with ocd 3 years ago and i was hospitalized for anorexia nervosa a year ago and thats when it all started i was a big guy and i wanted to lose weight because i never felt comfortable in my body. when i started losing weight i was healthy and eating balanced meals, i wanted faster results though so i started eating less and less and thats when i retained the mindset of “i have to be perfect” i started to do lots of skin care, gua sha, and ice rolling. although this is normal it wasnt for me, i was obsessed with being perfect all i wanted to be and do was to be perfect i wanted to be an object of obsession. i think this sense of dread of wanting to be perfect came from neglect from my family my whole life, i touch my face all day feeling for any crease or fold and when i do i apply heavy ammounts of moisturizer this also happens to effect my face because the moisturizer is causing me to break out but i cant stop, i am obsessed with the thought of when i get wrinkles or smile lines i will be ugly and nobody will want me i use moisturizer as a thought distressing thing i guess? it helps me feel like i am not aging because my face is well moisturized. When i noticed these bumps on my face i was looking in the mirror up close with a light shining directly above me i knew that this would accentuate everything on my face but i still somehow convinced myself this is how everyone sees me. im tired of applying moisturizer and ruining my skin because i think ill get wrinkles, i cant laugh, smile, chew big things, mouth breath, and drink from straws. i force myself to a straight face when something makes me laugh because that causes wrinkles, i know that this is some sort of ocd because i noticed a pattern of my ocd feeding off of things, as an example i used to struggle alot with soocd (sexual orientation ocd) which caused me to have a fear of being attracted to men which then turned into my looks by telling myself “i could never even date anyone anyways im too (comment about my apperence)” then after i lost all my weight i started becoming obsessed with my face and the way it looked constently nagging or making fun of myself and doing impulsive things like hitting my nose to make me feel better, now it turned into a fusion of how i look and how im aging, i constantly non stop compare myself to the most herrendous things that arent even human and i have to ask the people around me if i look like them. ive always been told i wae attractive or could be a model and i was very good looking by family friends and random people but i never beleive them i always would tell myself they are lying ot they are just making fun of me. apologizing for getting off topic but a conclusion of what im dealing with is i feel like i am aging so much and i constantly apply moisturizer to my face, touch my face, and ask people if im getting wrinkles. i cant tell if this is ocd or just insecurity but i lose sleep over this with constant wonder if i am good enough.
Does anyone else have really bad contamination OCD surrounding stds? Because I can hardly find anything about it on here.
Over half a year ago, This girl wanted me to erotically role-play a forced scene with her and to not ask the next time we chatted online I believe... (i cant remember if this happened or not) When we started doing that the next time we met, she suddenly left the chat. So Im scared on if consent wasnt given. I remember her saying that she got booted the next time I talked to her, and asking if she wanted to continue where we left off, but im not too sure and I cant recollect it... as a part of the roleplay, she would say things like "stop" and I think she roleplayed her movements but I dont remember if this was a part of the roleplay, or her genuinely telling me to stop... my friend on the explicit chat site says that since its been over 6 months, that I most likely didnt do anything to hurt her and that I should move on, but my intrusive thoughts keep saying that I violated this womans consent, when a womans consent is the most important thing to me... my harm ocd keeps saying I SA'ed the woman and intrusive thoughts of her saying this and I just throw up every time... now my harm ocd says I SA'ed another woman during an online roleplay session... saying that I started initiating roleplay without asking... this wasnt a roleplay like before, but it was a classic erotic roleplay... all i can remember is that she and I roleplayed together than she suddenly left during the middle... I genuinely cant remember if what my intrusive thoughts are telling me is true or not... and its absolutely scaring me...
Has anyone been prescribed Zoloft for ocd? Has it been helpful? Hope soon did you see results - improved mood and less anxiety.
I love my husband very much. I feel at peace when I’m with him and I like to make him happy. But ever since the soocd kicked in, I can’t stop thinking about whether im an imposter. What if I’m actually not straight and this whole time I was just going by what society told me was right - liking guys. What if when I was little I forced myself to crush on guys because my dad is homophobic? I had a sexual dream with another girl and it was like if I could control my actions and thoughts in the dream and I didn’t stop myself. That scares me so much. I just don’t want to hurt my husband in the future if I ever figure out if my true self is not who I thought I was. Sometimes I don’t know if it’s truly ocd or denial but it consumes my thoughts alllll day!
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
OCD doesn't have to
rule your life