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Who has had challenges with this and how have you coped? I have found this extremely tough in my 6 year relationship.

One thing that I’m struggling to bear with, is how isolating this feels… I spent all evening yesterday ruminating over intense groinal responses in response to intrusive thoughts. And then I had a dream where I experienced sexual arousal due to being in bed naked with someone… Not sure who, and I didn’t touch the person in the dream… But now my ocd is putting the two together and I’m triggered to the next level right now… I’m trying so hard to dismiss this as a stupid dream but I’m finding it increasingly difficult. I’m so lost, I don’t know what to do…

unfortunately i’ve been having more any more dreams of my dad. in these dreams he always tries to initiate intimate acts with me, and that scares me. i’m never able to speak up and yell no. but i have these dreams so often. i start thinking, did stuff like this happen when i was young? my dad and i have always been close, especially after my parents divorced. I used to sleep in his bed as a kid. i know i don’t remember anything. but that’s where the false memories come in. it’s like i can imagine this stuff so vividly.

I’m still early in my journey and have only had a few erp sessions. After the sessions, I feel totally defeated and depressed (even if I “did well”). I am totally overwhelmed thinking about the past 15 years I’ve spent reinforcing safety behaviors and ruminating. It seems like it will take a very very long time to see and feel meaningful progress. The sessions are exhausting and I have a family- is it really worth triggering myself like this? When did you start recognizing progress?

Those of you that partake in marijuana, how does it affect your OCD? Sometimes I feel like it calms me down and rids my brain of all intrusive thoughts, sometimes I feel like I take one hit and I'm spiraling. Just wondering how it affects other people. Love you all and am very happy I downloaded this app. I feel so much less alone. ☮️

One of my obsessions is always convincing myself I’m pregnant even though it’s impossible, I’m trying to not google symptoms and get reassurance for the first time. I’m really struggling rn. One of the thoughts that usually makes me spiral is the idea if you’re stressed your period could be delayed. So then I’m trying I hard to not be stressed about it and get caught in a loop

Anybody else get depressing thoughts and feelings with their existential ocd? Like you have convinced yourself so much that nothing is real that you literally start to become emotionally detached from things. For example I’ll be watching a YouTube video about the war that’s going on in Gaza or even a tattoo video on YouTube and I’m just getting thoughts like “so what? None of this is real anyway, why should I care?” Etc etc. and it feels natural, like it’s 100% fact but at the same time you know something is wrong and you try and reality test your way out of these feelings but it just doesn’t work. I can’t enjoy anything anymore because of this.

Whenever the topic of mental illness is brought up or the possibility of medication being involved my dad does not like the idea of it. I want to and need to go on medication I feel like I’m getting worse and with the recent news of my school work being effected I cannot do that anymore. I’m 19 years old so I can technically take medicine if I want but I live with my parents still and I hate lying and keeping secrets. How do I tell my dad I want to start taking ocd medication?

What was a recent ERP win? Big or small, every step forward matters

Hello! My name is Erika, I am 24 years old and I believe I have shown signs of OCD since I was about 14 years old. I have gone to therapy along this journey, once for about a year or so when I was 14 due to self-harm and depression (which I believe may have been from an OCD flare up) and for about 6 months when I was 22. I was diagnosed with PMDD and ADHD and I have been prescribed Wellbutrin (was on it for 4 years) and Prozac (was on it for 3 months). I am currently unmedicated and not in therapy due to being unemployed and not having insurance or enough income. For the last couple years I suspected there was something else going on besides ADHD or PMDD and I thought maybe it was autism, but after doing lots of research, I believe it may be OCD. Does anyone have any recommendations for seeking a proper diagnosis as a low-income individual? Or just where to go from here? I have been getting worse and worse this past year and could really use some tips and guidance ! Thank you for listening 🙏

Hey, all! I am struggling. I’m in a bit of a relapse after success with treatment, specifically with mental compulsions. I am a champ at response prevention with physical compulsions now, but have never quite conquered my Pure O/mental compulsions. I find this difficult to understand. If we can’t control our intrusive thoughts, aren’t our mental compulsions thoughts that we can’t control as well? I know rationally this isn’t true, but it’s incredibly difficult for me to grasp the concept that I can implement response prevention for these as well. I struggle with rumination, replaying events, trying to problem solve, etc. Does anyone have any tips to identify when you’re doing mental compulsions, and tips to implement response prevention? I don’t even realize it sometimes before I’m deep into the anxiety, and it’s very distressing. I am practicing self-compassion, acknowledging my suffering, and trying to accept where I’m at. It’s hard, but I’m doing it. Any advice and support is appreciated ♥️

well, we had a good week! and i’ll be seeing him as soon as tuesday! but i was up a lot of last night, feeling anxious and worried about all the things i want to talk to him about. about loving me, choosing me over other people. i just want us to be perfect. but i also can’t ask too much bc that’s too much stress on him. why does it bother him so much to give me reassurance! like… it’s not hard and i would give it to him, and do when it’s necessary. all i want is for him to like me, love me, care about me, and choose me other all other people. yk what? he called me his favorite person. and when we listened to a podcast, someone in the podcast was talking about the husband not wanting to spend time with the wife. and we were both like “you should want to hang out with your person.” stating that when we are together, he wants to be together. he likes that. i hope he tells me he loves me soon.

Is it still only ocd when you think/obsess/ruminate over if something traumatic happened TO YOU not by you? Sometimes I get weird groinals or intrusive thoughts near my family members. It makes me wonder and ruminate over if something may have happened and I just can’t remember. Thoughts like, “What if I was abused and can’t remember?” I haven’t had this issue in a while but it came back up because I had a bad dream :( I know dreams are meaningless so I don’t want to ruminate over it but I don’t really know if anyone else has themes directed towards others like this. It’s almost like what if I have PTSD and don’t know it? Please help

What is OCD? A vulnerability to certain anxious thought patterns. Do we control all our thoughts? No. Do we control a lot of our thoughts? YES. We absolutely have influence over our thought life, therefore we absolutely have influence over "OCD". We are not passive victims, helpless in the face of some unmovable force acting on us. We are active players writing our own stories, who just happen to fall into the same rut more than others. Let's get out of that rut. OCD is pathetic, it's nothing, it's trash, it's a joke, it's a false reality, it's nonsense, it's lies, it's the enemy wanting us to desperately run circles in our head all day. We have an awesome toolkit - God, exposure therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, affirmations, distress tolerance, thought restructuring, thought labeling, help from family/friends. Let's get this done. Today is a brand new day. This next moment, right *now*, is a brand new moment. Each new moment is a fresh chance to go a different direction, to say "sure maybe" to intrusive thoughts and laugh them off, to start a new life. This is not some fluff to make you feel better, it's the absolute bedrock truth of the matter. Nothing is stopping us from changing our thought pattern at any given moment. Let's take back control, let's get this done, let's get back to what we love, let's go, let's GO, LET'S GO!! OCD is garbage, take out the garbage today. God bless each and every one of you.

Hey guys 😞 I'm drained..I like to use that word a lot and it's truly how I feel. Sometimes it's hard to distinguish ocd and depression in certain circumstances. I feel like I have a lot of negative self talk going on like I tell myself aside from family no one cares about me. It comes in full force and I feel like I'm trying to figure it out and I'm engaging with the thoughts. It's bad. Sometimes it's so hard to be mindful when overwhelmed and hit with all these emotions. I wish I could dump my brain in the garbage. I've done erp in the past quite a bit..actually a lot. I was relaxed for awhile because I was functioning pretty well. Then I took some big steps in my life. I started socializing more..I love doing that but my self esteem isn't great at all. I took the initiative to ask someone out and I recall the anxiety that struck shortly afterward. Thoughts do I truly like her? What if I don't like her what does that say about me? I felt she genuine about her though so having these thoughts were so distressing. Was my first true relationship ocd hindered my so much in the past. I'm 29 and very much ashamed that that I haven't been truly intimate with another partner. I never got involved in anything as a teen like recreational drug usage because it was a core fear of my ocd. I would say I'm pretty fortunate though in a sense I didn't really go down the route. Addiction runs in the family. I would say my biggest issue now is how quickly things turned..I am plagued by ocd and depression most of the day. The things that help me is interaction if I can muster up the strength. My job is a good source of interaction but it's also highly stressful for me now. I work as a life coach for adults with autism spectrum and developmental disorders. I legitimately feel like work is going to run me into the ground. I wasn't able to get a leave from a doctor despite expressing my concern and I feel like not be about to take a little leave from work scares me. I have another 3 weeks until I see him..maybe a little more. I'm just holding it together but I feel so alone. My mood is up and down and I hinge my happiness too much on others unfortunately. I want to give my whole self to people..I just want want to feel like someone cares about me. I want somebody to text me and actually check in with my aside from family. I've been so much more social but it hasn't been easy. Sometimes I feel a little bitter. The world doesn't owe me anything in any sense and people go through there own stuff. I'm pretty apologetic for expressing how I feel and I assume what people think too often. I get the sense people are sick of me bringing up my struggles..I honestly try my best to get to know other people. The thought runs through my head though..do you even care about others?? Would you guys consider that moral scrupolisity? Just the fact I wrestle and it's a tug and war with my mind reminds me so much of my past days of severe ocd. It's returning with a vengeance. I really want social relationships I want an intimate relationship but I get this nagging feeling that I'm just a burden no one wants to take on. I took off from work today it's been hard. I've been doing that a bit more. In my past I used to do it a lot when my anxiety was terrible. That's my verbal vomit I just wanted to go into a little detail I've only really posted once in here. Be well.

I am new to this. I recently was reading the Bible and then had a horrible blasphemous thought and it was vile and intrusive. It hasn’t gone away and now I’m questioning whether I will go to heaven or not if God will forgive me. I cried and cried and I kept repeating numbers in my head or stating different colors in my head. I asked God to help me but the thoughts won’t go away like it’s cutting me and I keep seeing the scar. I didn’t do good at work because I keep getting sweaty from guilt I tired to be more productive than usual so I wouldn’t think but then would stutter over my words bc the thoughts wouldn’t let me breathe. Then at home I tried to drown myself in alcohol only to end in a fight with my husband. And none of this is in chronological order because I feel dumb just writing all this. The most important thing is I know I Love God , Jesus and the Holy Spirt. I just want to feel better and not feel like a complete monster 😔😢

i've had a terrible dream this morning about my fears getting pretty much confirmed. I've avoided to address this the whole day doing a rehearsal, going at the bar with friends and playing games till 2 AM. I don't know how to move on from that dream. Something horrible happened. I felt genuine arousal and now everything seems meaningless. That dream basically confirmed my fears and invalidated all the things I reassured myself about false attraction and staring ocd. I don't know how to proceed after that dream. My hopes of being a good person got crushed. All is meaningless now. I don't even feel that much distress about it. Probably because I shut it down and didn't fully address the dream, reality hasn't kicked in yet I feel defeated. I feel like a **** and my identity is in shambles. Even at school I felt defeated and was wondering what's the point. "What's the point now of even avoiding sophomore and junior girls""who cares feel attraction like your friends do" and I felt like I stopped caring about my moral code and when I realised that I didn't like it. It all feels meaningless. The one thing I didn't want to feel I felt and now l'm empty. I don't even feel distress no more.

Hi everyone, I’m new on this app, got recommended by a friend. I struggle with obsessive thoughts, mainly focused on ROCD but also obscene sexual intrusive thoughts. Recently, I broke up with a guy I was seeing because I thought I just ‘wasn’t feeling it enough’. Now in hindsight, I think that I was struck by relationship OCD. It started with what ifs like ‘what if I stop liking him at some point’ at it started snowballing from that point to constant anxiety and worries about if I liked him enough. At some point I also started wondering if I was attracted enough to him, and this one especially distressed me the most because I felt like I was an awful and superficial person for even thinking about this. Like I said, eventually I broke up with him because I just felt too stressed out. Thought I’d feel relieved after that, but I’ve been in doubt ever since. I miss him a lot, but my main worry is now that I might have just broken up with him because of how he looks. This thought is so distressing to me, I keep trying to go over everything and find arguments why this would or wouldn’t be true, feeling like I can’t live with myself if this would be true. Don’t really know what I’m looking for by posting this, maybe even some reassurance… I was wondering if anyone else has ever had this experience before? Or just has some advice? Thank you so much ❤️

Does anyone suffer from the fear of schizophrenia or having psychosis or being possessed just want to know I’m not the only one I feel like us as ocd sufferers think we’re alone

Did anyone else used to read messed up fanfictions on wattpad and stuff? I have so much guilt it’s so unbelievable what I used to read and I don’t understand how I could have read some of the things I read. The amount of things I did wrong as a kid/teen I feel like I’m completely numb to all of my monad like I don’t even care that much anymore. I know it’s not true but I just feel so defeated. I feel like I was a p word and other messed up stuff without realizing I was. I was homeschooled and didn’t have any real life interaction with anyone and not great sex education, and I say this to myself maybe it took me longer to figure out certain things were unusual or wrong but that’s not really an excuse. Idk. I feel so burnt out and out of ideas for what to do. I want to die and I want to live at the same time. I’m scared of everything and all of the mistakes I made. It’s just an endless list of mistakes. Sorry, I just am desperate for a need to vent.