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what's happening is everyday or so I realize I've done something bad or wrong to god and I go to say sorry but when I say sorry my feelings feel a mix of things and I realized those are ocd feelings but I feel like that after I say sorry I didn't say a long or proper enough sorry so what should I do now ? Should I not say sorry because I know God understands all my feelings and he knows I'm sorry but my question is should I not say sorry should I ignore the feelings and how can do realize something everyday

What does a false memory feel like? I have an actual event, but my brain always tells me lies about it and makes it feel worse and I know what its saying is not real but it scares me. Is this a false memory?

Don’t usually have bad dreams about my intrusive thoughts but I just did. And during a daytime nap, too! That never happens. Can I tell somebody about them?

I feel like my hocd is targeting all girls but one in specific. And I just feel like that’s not as common. It feels real. I sound like a broken record about this but I am mainly obsessing if it’s real with her or not. I don’t want it to be. We used to be so close. As well as in general but it’s bad bad with her. My sexual intrusive thoughts have pretty much limited to just her. And I honestly want to throw up. Why do I feel like this situation is only happening to me

I wish I wasn’t grieving and depressed so much about my ex who i felt I didn’t have enough feelings for, whom with I was forcing loving actions because they didn’t come naturally. I’m just wanting to do nothing right now and wallow in grief until it lifts. But that may takes longer than I have actual time to do nothing. I feel like the universe didn’t deem me good enough for him ?? despite that I mentally wanted him and fought for it so much. He was amazing. Was trying to tell myself the universe probably has a more complex way of deciding who’s with who, and it is too simplistic and probably incorrect for me to assume ‘I’m not good enough.’ See, I even said ‘probably’. Sigh...I wish I was nicer to myself.

This isn't OCD related but Honestly realising how antisocial I'm makes me sad. But whatever :). Like holding convos online and in real life is so different. I'm worried nobody actually likes to talk to me and I'm annoying so I usually don't speak. I sometimes can't tell if that's a good thing or a bad thing? ?

I have BPD on top of OCD and had a falling out with a best friend of 10 years. I have friends who say she’ll come back she just needs time and after a while I started giving her her space. Either way she recently blocked me on everything except Facebook and another website, instead she kept me as a friend on some things and just made it where I can’t see her stuff. (I wasn’t trying to really look just check to see if she removed me on those as well) and ever since then I kinda went back to square one where I was mentally a couple months ago. My OCD keeps making me think of every terrible thing I’ve ever done in my life- especially in my teen years. I’m on social media quite a bit especially because I’m an artist and need to post on social media to get my stuff out there, and I constantly think what if people find out bad things about me? What if I get some terrible call out post? What if I’m a horrible person deep down? If it’s not one thing it’s another thing. Like one day I’ll be obsessing about my best friend and I’s relationship or our roleplay we had for a decade and the times we’ve rpd sexual things and my brain is like what if she was uncomfortable with it and never told me??? Next day I’ll be obsessing about my real life friends and how they say really bad bad things politically. And then the next day after that I’ll obsess about a relationship I had online when I had just turned 17, and I didn’t know how old the person was and they go on to tell me like a month or two later “I’ll be 14 in 2 months” and asked if I was mad and over the years therapists had given me reassurance that I didn’t do anything wrong even tho I told them this person and I even role played once I don’t know. I don’t wanna do wrong and I know people make mistakes in their lives I just wish I could redo life a lot of the time. I’m 23 now and I feel guilt and cringe at every stupid thing I’ve ever done. I end up feeling sorry for myself a lot of the time and end up self loathing and wondering the purpose of continuing to go on in life. I’m a perfectionist. I’m depressed. I can’t even find a job that’ll work with me. I also possibly have ptsd and autism and I can’t even get to a therapist. My old therapy place won’t take me back either and I don’t have a car to get to the other therapy place. I just want a normal life. I want a normal life. This is such a ramble. I just feel so scared and depressed all the time even when I take my medication. I feel like I’m not allowed to enjoy anything, I feel like I’m not allowed to live my life because I hurt someone I love. I keep switching emotions from guilt to anger at her. My friends are getting tired of my shenanigans again because I was ok for a while but then when I was blocked just randomly my mood just dropped again.

Hi everyone, i was just wondering if there are any germaphobes on here?

Last time I STUPIDLY relaxed, I was kicked out unexpectedly by someone I was with for 10 years. He made me leave with no warning signs the relationship would end, cheated on me and took my rent money for a holiday to avoid me and my rage. I do not accept uncertainty anymore. Absolutely never. I want to KNOW I won’t be dumped. If I am I’ll kill myself end of. I can’t get over my std fears unless I get tested again. I’m convinced I have infected myself my partner will think I cheated when I DIDNT and he won’t believe me and he will OBVIOUSLY LEAVE ME

Anyone with OCD and tinnitus experience? Or the fear of having tinnitus?

Who here suffers with derealization? How would you describe your experience with it? When/how often do you have these symptoms?

Ugh I just feel like a lesbian at this point I hate it with a passion :(

So, I have a question: Is telling people who have HOCD that even if they ARE gay it's okay and there's nothing wrong with it bad, or is it helpful? I want to reassure folks struggling with their sexual identities but I don't want to go about it in the wrong way. As a gay man who is very confident about his own sexuality, I really do not understand HOCD. It seems to rely on the notion that there is something bad or wrong about being gay, or attracted to the same gender in general, and in a lot of ways it seems like a very severe case of internalized homophobia.

I’m grossed out I seen a picture of someone dressed up as a anime guy and i found out it was a girl as now I’m freaked out I’m attracted to her and lesbians please help

Guys.....idk how and why?? I came home today to take a nap and ever since I woke up my mind has convinced me that I'm gay/bi!!idk what to do...!! My heart wants to be heterosexual/heteroflexible so badly!! I was looking at my insta today and all I see are pretty girls and I keep getting falsely attracted to them!!! I can't look at videos without checking myself...:( Can somebody provide a bit of advice or assurance? Ik I shouldn't be asking but I'm so distressed...:(

I truly just wish I didn’t have to live anymore. Escape to heaven so I don’t feel so awful and depressed anymore. I feel I’m losing my boyfriend cuz I’m so fucking nuts and ruin everything good in my life so now I’m scared to even talk about my ocd to him anymore. I am hurting so bad. My whole body hurts. My heart hurts. My head hurts. I fucking HURT AND ITS NEVER ENDING

I think the overuse of categories are bad. Ocd is ocd, it just clings to whatever themes are important to the sufferer at the time. Also, when there no “category” (for example, I’m obsessed with STDs and it leading to me being abandoned) it makes me even wonder if it IS ocd because there’s no one else experiencing this, and there’s no category lol

And if I show you my dark side Will you still hold me tonight? And if I open my heart to you And show you my weak side What would you do? Would you take the children away And leave me alone? And smile in reassurance As you whisper down the phone? Would you send me packing? Or would you take me home?

I just got a memory back saying when I was 11 I would always jump on this other girls back cause she reacted funny and I always argued with her hair that it was purple when it was red. I liked a guy at the time though, or so I think I did? Idk I’m scared this means I’m a lesbian or that I was flirting with her. I don’t remember ever thinking I had a crush on her tho:( is this normal?? Does this make me a lesbian??

Sensorimotor and checking OCD ~ First post on NOCD. Does anyone else have an abnormal amount of focus on bodily sensations? How do you deal with it? Also the doubt that comes with harm coming to your loved ones if you don’t check something in a “special” way. What helped you the most?