- Date posted
- 5y
Hi everyone so I been seeing here that everyone has problems sleeping and nightmares with their theme I also do too but I also have a very heavy sleep I had nightmares wake up and have many intrusive thoughts but my sleep is too heavy that that I don’t fully wake up I try to fight them saying that is not my thoughts or fighting with them talking while I sleep this triggers me so much because my theme is Religious ocd and I have blasphemous thoughts:( I’m scare that I will say something while I’m half awake. I feel super attack by this thoughts at in the nights and early mornings because I’m a heavy sleeper I will wake up but not fully. This also makes me feel bad because I see everyone having panick attacks and wake up and I don’t which it makes me feel that I don’t care even thought I really do a lot when my theme first started I wouldn’t even sleep the whole night. Also sometime I’m scare I will speak my thoughts aloud and today I woke up thinking god won’t forgive me for all this thoughts like when I fight them in the nights they fight back and it’s really disturbing all the things they can say any advice or have you guys been through something similar also I am not very patient person so ocd has trigger that too because I been so upset that I’m not able to go back to my normal life or so upset that my whole world has tun upside down every time I feel any emotion happy, sad, mad it flips it and it makes a thought saying I’m blaming God for this episode in my life it also doesn’t help that anything I see about God triggers me and I haven’t been able to get near him I have fear of the unpardonable sin passages and as you guys know if you guys have read the Bible talks a lot about blasphemy I feel like everytime I read a passage or I try this theme comes out and for my people dealing with the something as you guys know ocd sometimes makes you think you come out with this thoughts when you don’t I fight them all the time but I feel condemn all the time also which it doesn’t help any advice please! The reason I want to get out of this theme fast is because I want to get rid of this thoughts but I also have false memories that I don’t know if they do sure happend that triggered me for example in the beginning when all of this started I would wake up I heard my self say something and then I would panic and I don’t know if it really happened or not and others where I fighting with my thoughts and then when I will come back to reality My brain locks like I don’t remember if I was saying thoughts aloud and fighting thoughts aloud please help. I know people will tell me God knows my heart but ocd is a monster sometimes it makes me believe this thoughts are mine and it will make me feel things for example when I get a thought I get a urge to smile and I really don’t anxiety anymore just worry. I feel like feeling condemn doesn’t help because I’m not upset at God but I also don’t understand this and I think like everyone when we go through hard stuff we ask why I know that it’s normal but my ocd flips it and I gives me terrible thoughts that make me feel more condemn. Any advice please
- Trigger warning
- "Pure" OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD