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So maybe the title wasn't the best to to put it but when you guys start having obsessive thoughts how do you stop them before it turns into compulsions and anxiety?

This isn’t about ocd well it kinda is because I think my ocd is starting to make me stress and burn out a lot and I don’t know what to do anymore it’s like a constant cycle of torture and I really thought I was getting better. My household area causes me to stress a lot and just me thinking about it is getting me mad at my mom why ? It’s because she’s the main reason she has four people in our house move in because they were struggling I know it sounds selfish but we are already struggling so putting people who we hardly know in the house doesn’t make it any better she’s put my brother girlfriend now ex because they broke up while staying here my mom is letting her live with us including my brother who doesn’t even like to work and creates drama due to his own issues , my brother gf who we hardly know and I really think she lies a lot about things to get attention which really pisses me off sometimes , she’s put my nieces deadbeat mother aka her sister in here WHY? I don’t know she chose a man over her children the fourth person is my one year old niece that screams all the time and messes with my rabbit and that stresses me out because my rabbit lives in the living room ☹️ and they sleep in there like literally all four of them and it’s so annoying because why do I have to accept people to live with me that I barley know just because I’m 17 like I know they need help but I feel like it’s all too much man like it’s helped with my harm intrusive thoughts because my father which I don’t even like calling him that tried to take my mom out of this earth by stabbing her last year and he’s always fighting with her because he thinks she’s cheating which isn’t the case at all he’s just on drugs which makes him think that and she didn’t kick him out the house for even a long time I think he came back in like a month of him stabbing her which makes me have intrusive thoughts on him always harming her when I have my music to loud or when my tv is too loud so I’m literally always listening to make sure that isn’t happening it’s caused me so much stress this year he also punched me and she only kicked him out for two or three days I think and got mad at me when I wanted to file a police report she’s abusive too by the way and when I’m going through it the adults in the house turn a blind eye so my sympathy for some of them isn’t really there

Hi, I’m new here!! I’m praying I don’t get judged for this. But, back in late May of 2022 ( literally right before I graduated high school), I added this one random girl from my school on Snapchat. She posted something about a graduation party , so I swiped up on her story basically saying how I can’t believe we’re almost graduated. She replied and we had a really short and simple conversation. The next day ( i believe) , we started talking a lot , and I just so happened to see her at the highschool when we were grabbing our graduation outfits and doing the rehearsal. When I saw her irl, I kinda got turned off ( I heard she was kinda crazy) , and on top of that , she was a little ugly irl. I remember seeing her Snapchat bio , and she was close friends with my female cousin ( a year younger than me) , who I happened to experiment sexually with when I was 10-11 years old. I remember going to work later that day and having sort of a lightbulb flick thought ( it wasn’t a good thought though) , what if my cousin told her about what happened when we were younger? So I started to kind of panic and immediately distanced myself from that girl. I also experimented sexually with one of my female friends when I was 10-11 , and from that day onwards, I’ve been pretty much living in paranoia and a little bit of guilt about someone finding out and my life being ruined . On top of that, It’s gotten worse to now sometimes I wonder if a girl I added off of quick add ( Snapchat) is underage even if they told me they were 18+ or had 18 and above in their bio, and I get so much guilt and anxiety about that. I even had a quick thought last February on what if I did something inappropriate with my younger cousin when I was 15-16 but I just can’t exactly remember when it happened , and it still eats me alive when I think about it, because I don’t know if it happened or not. I’m sorry for the long vent, I just wish I felt normal again. No matter how much I try to do things that old me used to do, life always feels “ off”. I always kept the top part about when I was younger a secret up until early (ish ) 2024, then I vented to one of my best friends and he told me that that’s a normal thing to do at a young age. Since then, I have told multiple friends and they all say they did similar stuff, but my brain just can’t accept that. Please help me, I quite literally overthink everything nowadays. 2021 was the last full year that I felt normal ( coincidentally, the best year of my life so far) . It’s not just about sexual related things either, sometimes I’ll wonder if I messed up something at work or hit a car while driving/hit someone and drove off. I just wanna live my life how I was supposed to live it after highschool ( carefree and happy) before whatever it is ( I think it’s ocd) hit me unexpectedly. Thanks to anyone who read this , I just needed to pour it out regardless of how negative I felt typing this, I hope someone can relate , because I feel so alone in my head at times.

Nocd online has a good article on intrusive thoughts during sex. It recommends carrying on as usual and not neutralizing them. I tried neutralizing it, i tried carrying on as usual n not letting it have power. But jocd makes me feel guikty for engaging in sec whilr havng these thoughts. I t says im arousing over the pocd tintrusive thoughts. Ocd intrysively associates for example p0rnstars with people or kids i kniw based on similar physical characteristics like hair color, skin color, freckles etc. this particular situation i watched a pornvideo n the icd said the woman looks like a friend who i thought was sort of pretty but than it gets worse and says her child looks like her so if in n masterb@ting to the pornsttar and having intrysive associations than ocd says im arousing over them toonit just the porn video. N it tricks ne by saying since i think my friends prettythan it means i couldve been arousing over he. And then it gets worse and says if her kid looks like her than im arousing over them. I know its classic ocd ideations and it causes me great distress. I trued neutralizing n csrrying on as the theraoy says but now i feel extrene doubt guilt stress abd anxiety

having trouble with cheating ocd & pocd bc of some bad situations that happened w my old summer job. i was a camp counselor before getting together with my partner. camp was an overall great experience, but I'm convinced that I'll cheat on my partner if i work there again bc of the summer hookup culture. I don't want to cheat on my partner I'd never want anyone but them, but I also can't trust myself to know that. when i was working i was single and interested in a coworker who would always "joke" flirt w me. i even told him i was into him at the end of summer & got denied (which was very bad for my intrusive thoughts, i get kind of disgusted with myself for thinking sexually about anybody who isn't mutually interested). since getting together with my partner the coworker messaged me, telling me he had a dream where i was "hot and tall with a swimmer's body," and jokes about me being "hung." it made me really uncomfortable, and i convinced myself of a lot of terrible stuff: this was my fault bc i used to flirt w him it wouldn't have happened if i never did that, the conversation was basically cheating because it was my fault to begin with. few weeks ago i caught a glimpse of a different summer crush's Instagram, had a passing thought of him being attractive and couldn't stop ruminating on it. felt like i was essentially cheating and it was more evidence that I can never go back to camp. and the scariest one. mostly come to terms w this but it's still terrifying. an underage coworker rlly came onto me, they initiated basically cuddling under stars and i had a passing thought about liking it and i was so so so disgusted with myself for days. i begged an online friend for reassurance. i know now that it doesn't mean anything, i had absolutely 0 romantic or sexual intention with this person. but i can't go back to camp if they're there, because i feel like they might think im a pedophile and in those circumstances it's the underage person's feelings who matter. if they feel hurt or uncomfortable bc of how i went about that situation then it's all my fault and i must've had horrible intentions. my obsessions over these complicated, real situations (+ ocd fabricated nonsense) are ruining a place i once loved.

I have the thought of what if I lose control and do something out of my control like scream for no reason or yelling in a store or just blurting stuff out that’s not in my control and it causes so much anxiety and causes me to feel weird. I always think I’m on the edge of losing control of myself and it’s exhausting living like this. Any tips?

I have been with the same girl for over 8 years and met her when I was in high school. I wasn't always the best boyfriend and obviously that young I made many mistakes in our relationship. Although, I never physically cheated, I did think of other girls or look at other girls social media accounts while getting off. I know its wrong now and its something I wouldn't do again, I guess I thought if as like watching porn. Anyway, for the past year I have dealt with a lot of OCD thoughts in my relationship. It seems to always switch reasons, but it always ends up with my relationship. My first panic attack made me believe that she wasn't "the one" and that I had to leave or it felt like I would die. Then I started to ruminate on past mistakes that I did and feel guilty if I don't tell her everything. And most recently, I have extreme guilt about getting off to other girls, which is something I haven't done in awhile. I feel like I'm lying to her by not telling her every singe detail and I this extreme guilt that I cannot get rid of. I feel like a cheater and that she wouldn't love me anymore, If I told her the truth. Obviously, I know it's normal to look at other girls and think they are attractive. But my mind says I have to confess her each time I think this. And the fact that I went a little further to getting off when we were younger makes things even worse. I love this girl with all my heart and I don't wanna hurt her at all. But it's killing me keeping everything inside and not sure where to go from here. Anyone experience anything similar or have any advice?? Thanks in advance!!

I was doing slightly better for twenty minutes, and then I had a bad thought. I felt like I liked it for a few seconds before my stomach twisted and my heart dropped. This is too hard.

I’ve had OCD, never saw a doctor but I’m pretty sure for over 59 years. When I was young, it was numbers, doing things a certain amount of times ect. As I got older, it was having to hear things more than once, or rereading to make sure I knew what I read. When we had kids, it was the fear of bad things happening, still as a parent, at age 62, two military sons, great wife, I still Do!! I have the fear of death, what happens ect, as I’d hate to this life on earth as it…now, I always loved music, but now I put rhyme words to songs, started out fooling around, now can be stupid things saying go myself?? I can hear or see a word, and my mind continues on, thinking all weird things, lol, I don’t get it? Any info out there from anyone maybe reading this?

I feel like a really terrible person right now, I keep replaying this, and no matter what I can’t remember what happened, it’s like my brain is purposely not letting me think about it. Without wasting any more time, I’ll get into it. Basically, I was at Walmart, and looking at cards with My Dad, I saw anime ones, took pictures of them for my sister, even ones that were anime kids, because I did my best to ignore it, so I looked at a Hunter x Hunter card, I stared at the black haired kid, being all like “ I’m glad I’m not having any thoughts about this, I’m glad I’m having normal thoughts and not thinking anything” I felt happy, then as soon as I looked at killua (white haired kid), everything collapsed. I don’t know what happened, my brain won’t let me remember. But I’ll give bits and pieces. I think that I had false attraction, and something in my head, said “oh, I wouldn’t mind being attracted.” “He is attractive, and I’m attracted to him.” “I remember a girl thinking he is attractive and he is” “ It’s not wrong to be attracted” “ I don’t care about his age” .. something along the lines of that, and now I’m panicking super hard, because I’m worried if I said those things, I feel like I ruined my life that I’m a pe//do and deserve nothing, idk what to do, I feel terrible… I remember when I was having the intrusive thoughts, I was panicking and was worrying, but it kept playing out, and I kept hearing things talk, it was drawn out too long, that now I feel convinced that I was saying those things, I tested it too, and I can confirm that I didn’t say that, but why am I still not convinced? I know I wouldn’t say those things, I was hoping the complete opposite would happen. My brain kept making me feel like it wasn’t wrong and it was okay. Maybe that’s why I’m so convinced I did that. I’m just spiraling super bad right now, I don’t know what to do or what to think, I don’t know if I said that or not… even if I did test it, I genuinely just feel like I said it, and I wanted it, because I still feel uncertain, I still feel like I said it, part of me just wants to be like oh I did and so I can move on, not because I agree with it, I just don’t know what else to do… I’m really scared.

Specifically how can my fiance best support me without offering reassurance? I'm trying to encourage myself to grow and keep trying ERP, but I'm not sure how I can include my partner in a healthy way. I plan on talking to my therapist about it soon, but I wanted to hear thoughts from people who have been dealing with it themselves.

TRIGGER WARNING: i experienced csa from the ages of 5-10 that largely went unaddressed. I then experienced repetitive sa from the ages of 15-20 by various individuals. I obsess over my body, what it “could / should be used for”, accidentally harming children/animals, basic bodily functions, and sexual attraction. I perform compulsions that test these obsessions in a variety of ways. I post explicit images online, force myself to watch scary porn, and set up elaborate scenarios during sex. I wish I could just stop, and I don’t understand why I continually do these things. My girlfriend keeps telling me I have to become neutral to these intrusive thoughts to feel less distressed by them, but I can’t. I feel like this if I accept them in any way, or even feel neutral to them, i’m a terrible person who is pro csa, animal abuse, etc. I feel like, if i even become neutral to these things, it would be a losing a part of my values and therefore identity. These real experiences have been so impactful on who I am today. I don’t want to feel neutrally about these things. Do I really have to feel neutrally about these things in order to get better? :-(

**TMI Warning: This post is very personal and might be uncomfortable for some.** I’m feeling panicked and need to get this out. I have intrusive thoughts that make me question my morals, especially about consent. I have a CNC preference (consent to non-consent), but I feel so conflicted because I know how horrifying and heartbreaking real non-consensual acts are. The thought of anyone suffering in that way is so awful, yet I get thoughts that feel like I’m justifying the real thing—the immoral thing. Sometimes, I feel like I have to focus hard just to truly condemn it, and that terrifies me. It’s hard to separate these thoughts from who I am, and I’m scared it means something terrible about me. I feel so much shame for having a CNC preference. I know it’s rooted in consent, but I feel like I’ve never had certainty that I fully condemn the real thing. I’m scared that deep down, I might think it’s all the same.

I told my mother that I lied about the website and what I posted when they commented that I should kill myself, but I still feel bad. I didn't tell her how much time ago it was or what site it was, but she just said that it is okay and I don't need to say the whole truth, but I feel so anxious that I feel like throwing up all the time. How can I calm myself, my mom told everything is okay, but I still feel this pit in my stomach, I thought that cofessing would make things better.

I’m sure many know me because I’ve been around for so long, helping out whenever I can. But there are a lot of new people and I keep getting asked a few questions over and over again, so it’s easier to make a post. Here we go! And sorry for typos… this is a long one. I joined this app in 2019 to see what it was about and get extra support as I was working with my therapist in person for OCD and my other mental illnesses. It took 6 years to fully recover and be subclinical for all my mental illnesses, including OCD. Going on 4.5 years now of being fully recovered and happy! 6 years, you say?! Yes, it took 6 years because for half that time, I basically wasn’t listening to my therapist 😆 I’ve had all the subtypes you can imagine because I started showing symptoms of OCD at 4 years old—it runs in the family. I stick around to help whenever I have free time because I know OCD completely sucks. And in the beginning of my healing journey, I only had my mom and therapist for help, but they don’t have OCD, so I had support but not personal knowledge support—it’s the same vibe as an AA sponsor. I am up front and honest and I speak plainly—that doesn’t work for some people and that’s totally fine. But I got help from people on this app (they have moved on) when I first joined and I needed to hear the things they said even though I ABSOLUTELY hated it. It was the truth and they were helping me when they told me to do XYZ or stop XYZ. I carry on because I know getting advice from OCD survivors helps immensely. Also, I don’t have a badge or certificate or anything like that next to my name or on my profile because I didn’t get treated on this app. I hope this post cleared up some things 😌

We’ve all been there when you wake up in the morning and it seems like your ocd was just gathering up all its strength while you were sleeping just to SLAM you with a barrage of discouraging thoughts, emotions, sensations etc to ruin your day before it could even start. It’s difficult to endure, but here’s the solution that has worked for me… Treat it as a cold shower. When you take a cold shower when your body least expects it, it feels almost unbearable and you doubt your ability to withstand the discomfort… until you surrender to it. Then what happens, your body adjusts to the discomfort and you walk out the shower feeling refreshed. The same goes with the morning exposures. They are very uncomfortable. But you’ve been there already. Many times. You know that you can withstand it, but since you were caught off guard, you doubt your ability to do so and maybe even dread the fact that you’re still going through this. Drop that mentality. View it as a cold shower. Surrender to it without doing any compulsions, or research or distracting yourself. Meditate. Relax. Sit through the pain. Eventually, it WILL pass (we know this, but forget at the moment it’s happening). Once it passes, the pain lessens/evaporates, the thoughts slow down or stop or even remain with you throughout the day, but the difference is you’ve already done the work of surrendering to the hardest blow so now it remains as a shadow in the background which may continue to make noise but can no longer govern your day. Because you’ve taken charge of it! And as a plus—- Just like a cold shower desensitizes you to the potential discomforts of the day to unfold, getting your ocd in control as soon as you wake up leaves you at a much better space to handle any other troubles you encounter throughout the day, even if that comes in the form of other thoughts. This is what’s worked for me. It’s not easy but very much worth it. Hope this helps someone 💪🏾 🚿 🥶

These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.

+18 only!! TW for sexual content!! (This might be TMI, but I need advice) So, this is kinda embarrassing, but I haven't been able to self-pleasure without feeling shame or guilt. It's so bad that I've just stopped altogether, but I don't want to avoid it. It was something I enjoyed and was comfortable with, and now, because of OCD, it just makes me feel... gross. It's a perfectly normal and healthy thing to do, but my mind just tries to convince me that it's wrong. Had anyone else dealt with this? It's not a huge issue, but I'm tired of unnecessary shame. :(

PET OCD Urgent. 😓Scared I violated my cat OK, my OCD is acting up because when me and my cat were cuddling, like I always do with petting my cats rear end or scratching or patting. when I hold them, one part of my hand holds their butt. (Not their actual you know what but the rear end area) But anyways, it was making me feel weird and I also tried to feel for my cats tail to see where I should end the petting because I was scared to pet further and touch his actual butt. (I was petting downward on its side and was feeling for where the tail started to see where I should stop because the fear of actually touching the cats actual butt scared me) But then to do an exposure for myself I just told myself Just keep petting his butt or shoot even put both hands there and cuddle with him, or just pet him all the way to the end of his tail, I even allowed myself to fully cuddle with him and snuggle with him. But the exposure is only making me feel worse, and making me feel that I acted on something bad. I was just trying to show myself and even said out loud “look nothing bad is happening” this is making me feel like I acted on an urge and hurt my pet. My cat is fine and likes to be pat on the butt or scratched, and also to get his tail played with. He likes being pet on his stomach as well but that is only sometimes. Typing all of this makes me feel so scared. Now I am having these obsessive compulsions with my cats, that I have to pet them near the rear end to prove to myself that doing that does not mean I hurt them, but it’s not making me feel better!!

Lists lists lists, bane of my life. Since I would say last 4 years any worry that pops in my mind I put down on the notes app on my phone then come back to it sometime. Is this OCD?