Kickstart your recovery journey with a caring community of others
working to conquer OCD
Isn't it fucked up that I would, at the age 10, put my sister's hand on my breast while she was sleeping? I have accepted my other childhood sex acts, but this one... I'm not sure how to deal with it. You cant confront someone about something they wont remember, and I've been doing research and it said this is considered to be child on child sexual abuse. I'm a monster, truly. I cant find anyone else with this specific story, and it makes me more upset.
I'm doing scripted erp based on something that I thought of when I was 13..do I say in my script I was 13 or do I have to do the script as if it happening now.
Hiya, I'm new here. I really need help with my OCD, it's gotten extremely out of control since Covid started. One of my biggest fears is pregnancy, which is absolutely wild because I'm a virgin. I've tried ignoring it on my own, but it causes me extreme distress and I start crying. It gives me physical pain in my stomach until I give into the compulsions. Every time I ignore it it feels like giving into my fate of the nonexistent baby. It's stupid and I'm sick of it. It controls most of the things I do, like I can't have anything to do with the number 9 because of it (pregnancy being 9 months) 5 too, for some reason I'm not really sure of. I've given a lot of things in my life a number. My number is 4 so I can't stand seeing numbers like 45, 49, or 54. The compulsions (if you don't do or do _______ you'll be pregnant) happens almost every time I do ANYTHING. I don't know how to ignore it without causing a mental break down every single time. I need help, please.
I’m really hoping someone’s experienced this as well, I’ve been randomly getting super super anxious about the thought of people close to me trying to molest me... it’s never happened before but I have horrible trust issues and I feel like this is my ocd trying to attack me because my family is the only people I trust, it’s a horrible feeling and I feel like I’m trying to convince myself I was molested by a family member or that they want to when They haven’t. I’m just really confused and don’t know how to To go about it.
I’m confused on ERP. It works on the assumption that the individual definitely has OCD and definitely won’t act out and all the thoughts are meaningless. But how can they be sure? ERP is literally throwing caution to the wind in the hope that you habituate and your thoughts bother you less. It sounds great for other people! I’m sure people who really have OCD have so much relief and I wish them nothing but the best. But not me. Nothing will ever tell me if I’m actually in denial, or I’m actually going to act out. I realise these are common fears but I’m so terrified, I don’t know who I am anymore and the thought of a life full of doubt is just so hard. I’m so sorry for the depressing post but I just feel like there’s not much hope for me.
Just talked to my mom about my real event OCD. Feels good to get it off my chest, but I still feel terrible about what I did
What is the correct response to intrusive thoughts? Of course I know that you must avoid compulsions but what is a good mental process? Like, 'Okay whatever', or 'It's just an OCD thought', or 'Mm Hm disregarding'. What should you kind of say mentally?
questions for everyone ?: how would you rate your self-esteem? we’re you ever bullied in school? do you consider yourself open-minded? do you feel the emotions of others? would you consider your moral standards to be high? just curious some things. sending my good energy to everyone ?
I now sometimes get scared of having children in the future. Before all this OCD horribleness, I always dreamed of having 3-4 children. It seemed like such a beautiful dream and I would love that life. Now with all of this, there’s multiple things that worry me a lot. I’m scared that My children will have a higher likelihood of developing OCD since I heard that there’s increased chances of it happening from parent to child. I also sometimes deal with intrusive sexual and harm thoughts, and I don’t want that to be directed toward my children at all. I’m also scared that I’m not or won’t be mentally stable enough to have children. I’m in therapy now and doing better than I have before, but i definitely still have struggles. It makes me worry that I won’t be well enough to have children, or that whenever I become pregnant or sometime after it will cause such an intense mental turmoil that I will have a mental breakdown and spiral. It makes me very frustrated because I want to feel and think the way I did before all of this messed me up. To dream of a beautiful family and not have these fears come and not to have these OCD themes come and create excuses for different fears.
If someone could respond to this then that would be great I think I have HOCD, this started about a year ago after I left college and just after college I become lonely and depressed however I was talking to girl online who I got really close to and really liked her and then she later became not interested and this has happened with a lot girls which I feel has has an affect on me and this made more lonely, depressed. My brother is the same and always get depressed because we are both socially awkward and want girls badly, make jokes like might be gay because girl don’t like us you know banta and one night it sunk in and I thought what if I am and from then until now all I do is get anxiety everyday on google with fail, looking for answers on the same form is same video, talking to therapist which they say ocd, paying money out looking for help, getting civics there true and I want it and really do not, still like girl but in public I see a guy I walks ask am I attracted to him and have anxiety, can’t watch certain programm on tv, gronal response if they are and dreams that I wake up and feel like I’m have a panic attack even at work where I should be working I’m on google sneakily. I’m talking to a girl and really like her and fancy her but then I get things like do I fancy her, am I lying but I dot feel Like I am pls help
How crazy the thoughts can be when you are dealing with ocd???.. Like rn i can see a photo of an lesbian cop and be scared of it...(im a boy) At this point i dont even know what im scared of to do erp for it!! Like im getting crazy stupid thoughts... Any tips on how to deal with crazy unreal thoughts??...
How do I talk to my mom about real event ocd that involves my sister? I'm scared she'll call me a rapist, or think I am one
Real Event OCD TW About that terrible sexual assault event (maybe this is a strong word, but I dont know if only "disrespect" or "physical harm" would be better) that I already post here. So as I know for now, I crealy knew that what I was doing was wrong and that I deserve punishment, even this being already forgiven and forgotten. As more day passes and as I see more news and people talking about this kind of subject, more I go into a suicidal hole again. My arm is injured due to self harm, as I believe I deserve to suffer and never be happy.
A few years ago I made the mistake of talking about my real event ocd with my little sister, the one I believe I hurt in the past. She said she doesn't remember what happened, and looked freaked out. She didnt wanna talk about it at all. Now it's been two years and I wanna bring it up again but I'm afraid it'll go the same as it did before. The only way I can see around this is by going to my mom again. She talked to my sister when it all went down because I was crying over how she'll never love me again, but she talked to her alone. Idk about what. I need to know. I need to know if I hurt her or not but she doesnt remember what happened and I read about these child on child sexual assault victims who remember when they're older and I'm afraid that's the case. Shes only 15 now and I'm 18, so idk.
I had the worst what if moment or stating it as a fact. If anyone in the comments is okay with giving me advice that would be helpful!! I’ll just tell that person what is was. I don’t want to seek for reassurance
Having a really bad day today. I’ve had moments when I think I’m just going to accept I’m gay and that I’m in denial and this relieves my anxiety for about 10 minutes and then I start crying because I don’t really want that. Has anyone found that their OCD has manipulated memories of when they were young? Like maybe they mean I was gay? I had a thought yesterday were I was like did I find my mums body arousing when I was a kid, does that mean I’m gay. ITS TERRIFYING ME. My OCD makes me feel like I’m living a lie and I just need accept that I’m gay. I’ve now lost all attraction to men and think I only find women attractive :( Does anyone’s OCD makes them want to act impulsively, like I’m just going to tell everyone I’m bisexual and break up with my boyfriend in hope that these anxieties will go away. But I don’t want that, I want to be with my boyfriend, I want to feel connected to him again. Also is anyone petrified that these thoughts will come back in future even if they get over them now? I have this horrible image of me getting over this, being fine and then having children and getting triggered and then realising I’m gay and having to come out. It makes me so scared, and that I should come out as gay now and I’ll be happy. Also did anyone do any sexual exploration as a young kid, obviously not knowing what it meant at the time and feel this must make them gay as they think they remember enjoying it? I was like 5/6 and i bully myself all the time about it. Does anyone test themselves in public or when watching a film? Like I see if I’m turned on by women and get that feeling and I can’t work out if I do or if it’s just because I’m focusing attention their. But also I look at men now and feel nothing. Do people every wonder if HOCD is even real? Do people ever get over OCD? Literally OCD is slowly ruining my life and I just want to give up.
Any Muslims with religious OCD here. Would like to know what you guys are doing on your own to overcome anxiety regarding religion (Islam) and how do you feel better when suffering high anxiety?
Let’s share our tips for living with an open / unanswered question! For me, the open question I live with is “how do I know I’m not / don’t be attracted to (insert taboo content)?”
I was once quite a toxic friend to a girl I’m not really close to anymore. Looking back I did little things that were just so unkind. I even picked on her insecurities in a discrete way. To be honest, I don’t think she ever really realised or cared. I hope. At the time, I guess it must’ve been due to jealousy or something. I don’t even know. She’d annoy me but I don’t think I ever knew why for sure. That’s partly why I think I detached myself from the friendship. But I worry she blamed herself. But now I’m just worried about it. I don’t want to be like that with my current friends. I don’t want to let my insecurities and envy get in the way. I don’t want to treat people in that way. But I’m finding it hard to accept that I CAN change and I CAN be a good friend. I’m scared I am unable to care for friends. What I did was wrong but I fear being like that again. So is it possible to combat my inner emotions like jealousy to prevent these things? If anyone has any advice it’d mean a lot :)
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
OCD doesn't have to
rule your life
