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the NOCD Community

I keep waking up and immediately become angry either about the littlest or no apparent reason. It makes me mad at my s.o. when they didn't do anything. They asked last night if I didn't like them anymore, which is one of my rocd thoughts. I told them I do because that's what I want, but this anger thing keeps happening. I just want to wake up happy to see them and feel good about us again. Idk what it is or what to do. Any ideas?

I’m afraid I might’ve promised God I wouldn’t get married

Anyone else a new mom here going through postpartum OCD?

I wish people around me could be more supportive of mental health, I’m dealing with a bunch of mental health issues and can’t speak to anyone about it. I tried to talk with them about it but they just don’t understand what I’m going through.

Is anyone dealing with responsibility OCD? I don’t see it talked about much, but it’s one of the subtypes I struggle with the most. I just feel like everything I do is in order to “protect” my family and friends. That means everything from magical thinking, to repeatedly calling people to make sure they’re ok, to bargaining with god to keep them safe (even though i’m not religious at all). I spend A LOT of my time worrying about other people and trying to control what they do. For example, I’ll try to talk someone out of taking a trip because I feel like something bad will happen, or I’ll stalk someone’s Instagram to make sure they’re posting regularly, because that means they’re ok. Logically I know I have no control over other people, but OCD tells me there’s always at least SOMETHING I can be doing to keep them from getting hurt or sick. And obviously the pandemic has made this 1000x worse. Can anyone relate?

I took off my sheets and found a dried up brown bug skeleton and I want to just die. My brain 🧠 is telling me what it is and my heart is telling me I could be wrong. I’m so tired of suffering. I have no friends, no support system. I’m just a broken scared human

I am having some fears regarding sexual assault from a cruise I took back in 2011. During the cruise I was with some friends, and we went to a dance floor later at night. I am pretty sure this dance floor was 18+ as there was a ton of security checking ID's and checked my friends backpack and saw he had alcohol (he was 18) and took him and I to head of security. I did not give him the alcohol but he kept trying to claim it on me, I refused to sign anything so he finally admitted to it and signed the document and they confiscated the alcohol and we returned to the dance floor. I was visually upset and drank a significant amount of alcohol. I do remember we were all dancing on the dance floor and the first lady who was clearly taller than me danced asking where I was from. Later that night things got more crazy, people break dancing and others drunk. There was one girl I recall was dancing with many men including one of my friends and they were placing a song where the lyrics say "go low low low low" so I iust put my hand in her hip and did the same movements. She didn't force me away or anything, but during the song someone took a picture of us and freaked me out. She stood up turned around and held my wrists looked at me in eyes like "oh your not who i want to dance with" and walked away. Later that night I remember just putting my hand on someone elses hip and dancing they didnt do anything so i just solo danced. This was 9 almost 10 years ago. I have now thought what if I sexually assaulted someone or somehow one of these girls was a minor? I do remember a heavy security presence there, lota of cameras, clearly a lot of people there. Some girls wouldn't dance with me because my face looked young so they thought i was in highschool (i was 24 or 25). I think being drunk doesn't excuse it but my memory seems faster than what it was being sober some of the images in my head are a flash. I feel like a terrible person but then I am also thinking if I did do something, I assume Security would have done something, there would have been a complaint or I probably would have been arrested on American shores if this was the case What triggered this I guess was seeing the Ron Jeremy arrest story.

Hey me again. I was wondering again. So I’ve always been attached to babies and children. Kind of like an uncle. But I’m a teen. Like I’ve always found babies adorable. But I fear that makes me a p3do.

guys i'm very very scared :( so basically everytime i get an intrusive thought my brain goes like " its okay because.." it's as if it's trying to justify p*dophilia and its disgusting. or like " its okay because it's funny " IM SO TIRED. this is disgusting!

Idk whether this is OCD or if I should actually feel bad. During the George Floyd protests I can’t remember if I might have re posted a video where a protestors face was visible on my Instagram story. What if I did ? I cannot remember. So if a racist person hunted them down and killed them , or if a cop killed them it would be my fault .

Do most people here have friends they can talk to about OCD or friends with OCD? I wish I had friends I could talk to about it.

guys could you tell me how it goes with the therapist?? like what do you talk about and what does she ask you or smthg ?? i never went to one so i was curious

I had an epiphany Maybe even a breakthrough So lately i’ve been stressed out about this time years ago before i even knew about OCD, i had a gross intrusive thought, i thought about it for a few seconds, decided it wasn’t true, and went about my day...ya know the way emotionally healthy people deal with that Anyway lately my brain has been trying to convincing me that BECAUSE i had that thought and just let it go, and DIDN’T ruminate, freakout and avoid that situation for the rest of the day that somehow i was complacent or i secretly liked it So the epiphany i had was that my brain is ruminating on these things because it feels like If i don’t PUNISH myself for these intrusive thoughts (that aren’t my fault) Then i am guilty of some kind of moral failure. So i guess that getting better scares me Not sure how to deal with that though

How are you doing today? And what motivates you to move forward:) ?I hope you are all doing well. What motivates me to go on is knowing that improvement is possible and there are things in this world that make me happy. Like watching movies, drinking hot cider or cocoa, halloween, Christmas music, and fall:) also knowing I always have the ability to do good in every area of my life, and I can try to make the world a better place, even when it doesn’t feel like a good place.

So last night I wrote this on Facebook to my friends and family: Please don’t describe yourself as “so OCD” if you don’t actually have it and make it seem like less of a struggle than it genuinely is for people who do. OCD for me means my mind is always loud and running at a fast speed. OCD means insomnia and nights with 3-4 hours sleep. OCD means if I don’t want to be late in the morning I need to give myself 3 hours to get ready. OCD means everything around me has to be perfect or I can’t concentrate. OCD means carrying out the simplest task can cause a massive amount of stress. OCD means relief when I arrive at work because I have finally gotten myself out of the house, no matter how long it took! I get to work and my stress levels surprisingly reduce because one of the toughest parts of my day is over! And it’s a heap of other things I deal with! OCD is something most people don’t see. I laugh about it when I can but it sucks 🙄 people understanding it better helps ❤️ I’m just sick of people using it as a phrase and making it sound like no big deal!

Who else on here has contamination OCD it would be awesome to talk to others in the same boat

In moments of awkward silence or under pressure, I feel the urge to “confess”. Makes me hella anxious

Why did OCD start all a sudden :(((( Out of no where and I’m and adult.

I’m running out of SSRIs to try. I have been through all of them except two. All either stopped working after awhile or gave me really bad side effects or had ended up causing me to attempt suicide. The ones I haven’t tried are the SNRIs. Has anyone on here tried an SNRI medication? If so did it help?

So having a bad night tonight. Its such an emotional day, my partners sister got the all clear from cancer today so we were in a good mood,. Or so I thought.. I opened a bottle of champagne and I cooked a really nice steak dinner but before we ate my partner was outside and she went to the bin then I noticed she didn't wash her hands and she went straight to the shed and started touching a load of stuff so I came out behind her and wiped everything down, she got angry at me and threw the tools doen and said can you please not do that. I guess she was angry because I didn't trust her to wipe everything down after she washed her hands. The thing is I know she wouldn't have and it would of done my head in. So I woukd of had to go out after her and do it anyway which would have annoyed her ultimately. So, the mood on the house is very heavy. She is trying to talk as normal but I am in my own head and quite upset, I can't bring myself to be jovial now as 1. I'm embarressed about my ocd and 2. I don't think I was wrong in expecting her to wash her hands after being out at the trash where lots of poeple touch everyday before she touched other things. I'm just pissed off to be honest pissed off at my ocd and pissed off because I don't really think asking her to wash her hands after being at the bin is a big ask. I know coming out after her and antibacing everying maybe was a ocd but I think it was justified. I feel like. The best option would of been ride it out until she had finished and then hid the fact that I was wiping everything down. I just can't trust her to be as clean Concious as me.