Welcome to
the NOCD Community

To the gamers on here: What games relax you or let you escape your mind for a few minutes/hours?

Does anybody ever take a minute to think to themselves how they were before OCD came into their lives? How you may have thought beforehand, what you did, the hobbies you had, the feelings you got, or even the people you've met and still might be with now? I've been getting that a lot lately. Whenever I'm not dwelling on my past actions when I barely knew better or thinking about how my future may turn out, I eventually think about how I used to be when I didn't know what OCD truly was. What if I had thoughts like these but they were either repressed completely or I just didn't react to them at all? Did I always worry about the future back in high school? Possibly. Was I perfect? Much like the others, absolutely not. Have other people find8 through things that I can relate to or had it worse than I did? From what I can remember, they have. But, they all seem to be fine and we're able to let go of the past. Why can't I?

everyone says that in order to determine if it’s hocd you need to examine how it started. i feel like the way mine started is CLEARLY not ocd and rather just a sexuality crisis. I was 13 and had thought about it 2 times before, once in the 5th grade and once in the 6th grade. i can’t be straight if this has consumed my thoughts since then.

When will this end?! I am so sick of living like this. I can't even go to the bathroom without having panic attacks thanks to my contamination OCD. I purposely not drink enough water throughout the day to avoid trips to the restroom. I used to love drinking water throughout the day keeping hydrated...it was all about keeping healthy. Now I can barely function like a normal human being this past year and a half! This is a nightmare and I just want to wake up from it already. After four therapists I still feel no relief. I am set to see one on here through NOCD, but not for another month and a half. I feel like I am not going to make ot until then. :(

I keep coming up with reasons why I don’t love my partner and testing myself to see if it’s really me! I am so sick I wanna throw up! I don’t wanna break up with him! 😭😭 I can’t take it anymore! I remember a long time ago when I first had ROCD I told him I didn’t love him but I feel like if I say that now it will be the truth!! 😭😭

Anyone with Relationship + Harm OCD?

I want to learn more about Christ... But... How? I feel like an intense study of the scriptures would help, but I rarely feel the happy warm feeling I want to feel when I read about Him... I feel like I read and just feel kind of neutral when I feel like I should be like mind blown and crying with emotion... Haha. I know that isn't realistic. But how do I form a deep relationship with Christ, without... Feeling like I have to study him in the perfect way for it to count? Or without feeling that I am bad for not having some huge spiritual experience every time, something I know isn't how he works? Anyone relate or know how to chill out about this / be more successful?

For anyone that’s done ERP, what’s usually the goal and purpose of it? I start next week and I know I’ll get more answers then but just curious of anyone’s experience, and I know everyone’s situation is different but I don’t really fully understand the goal of ERP

My OCD is horrible today. I've not given up and just got into bed from the fear in a long time but that's what I've done tonight. I know in the past I've tried to convince myself of things that I now know aren't true such as if I did something wrong I tried to convince myself I hadn't done anything. Now I bet I have some of those patterns of thinking in other areas and I'm so frightened that in another way I'm lying to myself. Does this make sense? Please someone help me

I swear my life is cursed i feel like im attracted to men more than women. Sometimes i get little flashes of my attraction back. Can someone tell me some of the things they say in there head if they do ?

Lately I’ve been having this thought about if I have to experiment with people sexually. I don’t really want to and sex isn’t really my thing anyway, but I keep having this thought “you should experiment with girls” “that’s the only way you’ll know for sure” can I know for sure without experimenting? Can I trust myself? I was trusting myself, but now I don’t. I feel obligated to do this thing that I’m honestly afraid of and don’t want to do.

how open are you about having ocd? for example do you share your subtypes/themes with people or someone your close with? I am starting to be more open about it with one of my former teachers that I still have a friendship with outside of school and I don’t know how specific or vague I should be. I want him to understand what ocd is and what I live with but also ocd themes can be taboo and uncomfortable to talk about. I have the same question for what I should tell my family.

people with religious ocd: is anyone else terrified of doing ert because you’re afraid it’s gonna “harden your heart” towards sin? because that’s the main reason i haven’t done it :/

Have not came on here in a while and this is the only platform I can write what's on my mind . I'm really tired, frustrated, angry sad and depressed about my fucking life. I dont know why I'm alive. Like I just bursting out in tears. My whole stupid family is shit too. They dont give a fuck about me. My dad dont pay attention and ruined the whole family, my mom quarrels too much and she beeve tries to listen, understand and sit down to talk she just shouts and gets mad and stressed herself out and my sister does not care or pay attention about me, she says she loves me but she always lying about that . Me on the other hand , i am suffering so.mich with mental illness, anxiety, depression, OCD and who knows what else. I feel so alone, in a dark place. A place I am trying to get out of, it's tough. I cry everyday and I'm not happy and I feel like I have NO ONE. Fuck friends too, they dont care about me. I have tried to be a good person to everyone and that's the life I get. I have given my all, showed love despite my.moody attitude tried to make people smile when I was down.. I dont know what to do. Just give yo at this point. No point in living , no point in life. MY LIFE IS GARBAGE, A PIECE OF TRASH , THE FUCKING WORST.

If you have worries about your reality or what happens after death, please dont read this. I was on social media scrolling through when I saw a prediction about a zombie apocalypse and the world ending in 2021. I'm full on panicking right now. Happy new years I guess :(

Existential Anxiety Anyone else question their life’s purpose or wonder if there is an afterlife. I have been obsessing over the idea that we are mortal and it’s stressing me out. I want to live in the moment and enjoy my life, but I can’t stop obsessing over these thoughts. Can anyone relate? What helps?

I wish I could let go of this. I would give anything to be okay. I just want my husband. I feel like I’m a lesbian in denial. No other girl here sounds as much as a girl in denial as me

i just think i’m bi but literally just can’t accept it. every time i try and tell myself i’m bisexual i cry but it feels so real right now.

Hello! I am a new member. I am from Brasil! First of all, I wish all of you a happy new year and i hope to help wth my ocd treatment experience.

In March, I started suffering from sexual orientation OCD (a new theme for me). Basically, I became obsessed with a thought that I might be straight after randomly getting aroused by a woman in a movie. Prior to that, I had mainly suffered from health-related obsessions. My anxiety hasn't subsided. I keep questioning and checking. I've read books about OCD, listened to countless podcasts - nothing helps. I've never been so depressed and apathetic on New Year's Eve. I ended up relapsing because a thought popped into my brain that you cannot resist your urges. I ended up watching porn today "to check". I understand that the sense of urgency, inevitably, and uncertainty is typical for OCD but my brain won't negotiate (especially when I get an erection because of intrusive thoughts).