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What’s it cheating ocd? Is it thought of that you want too cheat?

my thoughts feel so real and genuine, like i really want them, yet it barely stirs up any reaction: i don't feel anxious about me feeling like i like them. is that normal? does it happen in ocd? why don't i feel anxious? i am not looking for reassurance, just actual information. like can i feel like i like the thoughts and feel no anxiety? it used to make me super nauseous but now i ignore them and ignore the feelings and it makes me feel more in denial. sometimes i get these "visions" in the future of me falling in love with kids (and girls) and it feels like that would happen and it doesn't make me anxious or stressed

Hello everyone 😀. I hope you're doing well. Actually I am not sure if I have OCD. I just have compulsions and doing those compulsions take alot of my time and energy. I don't have obsessions. I am quite confused if I really have OCD or not. But my compulsions are unwanted and are slowly eating my from the inside. I have no thoughts or reasons for my compulsions, it's just like have to do a certain things repeatedly until I feel relieved for a short period of time. But if I don't do my compulsions then I have severe anxiety and I even experience panic attacks. Please tell me what is my disorder. I can't understand why do I have compulsions without any obsession. These obsessions make me want to kill myself. I am a 18 years old boy and I have been dealing with this problem since I was 16. Please help me🙏🙏. I am in severe distress. I ain't doing this to gain sympathy or for attention. I do not know what is happening with me and I am scared about it. I want to kill my self because of my compulsions. I thank all of you in advance for all the help🙏🙏💖💖

Anyone here play any video games, tabletops, etc? Tell me what you nerd out about. I'll start, I love old school SNES games (i'm 31, grew up around the SNES, Amiga, etc), especially old JRPG's like Chrono Trigger. The story and gameplay will always have me stoked. What about you?

Okay so I have a bad habit of imagining scenarios and gauging my responses to them to see what I like and I just saw a picture of Megan Fox like touching tongues with her boyfriend and I tried to imagine that I was doing it with her and I felt so many groinal responses and now I don’t know what to do. I am panicking slightly. I don’t want to just label it a groinal response because what if it was real arousal? Like I’m scared that I’m just in denial by labelling it a groinal response, brushing it off as a groinal response seems like something someone gay in denial would do. I’m so ANGRY, why can’t I just know who I am

I think I focus on my partners flaws way too much. The things that never use to bug me are bugging me now…. I hate it… I am having a hard time believing my feelings are there…. I’ve been even asking myself do I feel love for my mom? Or anyone else just to see if my depression is the cause of this… 😢 I am mentally tired… I just want my life to be happy again…. But it feels like it won’t… Breaking up is all I have been thinking about… I know if I wanted to I would’ve done it. But why is that not a sign I love him…..

I think I just deserve to die

Okay, I’m going to belt my heart out because I’ve been ashamed for so long that it’s actually killing me inside and yesterday, and even now, I'm still having persistent thoughts that I should just die and not be here. I guess I’ve always suffered from OCD but never really knew until my staring; OCD got so bad during the pandemic that it became unbearable to leave the house. But that's the thing with OCD I've learnt over the years it leaches from one thing and evolves into something else, just when you think you're getting better. Pure evil! In 2015 I had intrusive thoughts thinking I was a paedophile, which was horrible. I had opened up to a friend telling her id been abused as a child. A week later, there was an article saying how most child abuse victims end up being the abusers this set me off , and I was in absolute fear that this would one day be me. Then the Michael Jackson documentary came out, followed by r Kelly's one, both child abusers that I couldn't even watch all of it cause I had full-blown panic attacks. I avoided kids for such a long time, and the thought of even having my own kids became a thing because my OCD had convinced me I was a bad person and sick. But this weirdly passed after a few years as it was just thoughts and not actions Then I developed insomnia, I couldn't sleep for years, and it made me sick. I was on medication, and the anxiety was rife. My OCD cycle was ‘you're not sleeping tonight’ and ‘you will die from not sleeping’ and ‘your gonna lose your job as you're not performing well’ all of these constant thoughts made me go crazy, but even at this point, I didn't know it was OCD, I just thought I was going mad. I didn't know about the OCD cycle or ruminations. Then I researched breath work, and that's solved the problem. So I bloody thought. Then checking Ocd came into the picture where I would consistently be late for work cos I would have to walk back home to my door to make sure it was locked, and the taps were off in case my house would get robbed and flood. I'm still dealing with this one, and it's a nightmare! As the whole journey at work, I'm thinking of floods and theft. Alongside this checking OCD, I developed a staring OCD which started in 2018 when one of my friends asked me if her top was too low, and I looked, and I felt uncomfortable and since can't stop looking at breasts. This type of OCD, by far, is the worst as it's stopping me from living life. I can't even talk to women, and I'm a woman! I'm avoiding all interactions, and the ruminations are full-on that I'm getting headaches. It was only when this type of OCD occurred that I did research and realised it was OCD, and I cried cos I thought it was going mad. I'm trying so hard every day, but the voice in my head to ‘stare’ is always there. It's horrible, and I've never wanted to leave this earth as much as I want to now. I've even prayed to God, which is something I haven't done in 15 years. No one's called me up on it, but I know it's making people feeling uncomfortable as they pull up their tops or do their zips up, and then the anxiety kicks in cos I feel so bad. This OCD is really making me feel like a shit person and that I'm doomed for life. Any help or similar stories would be appreciated. Thank you!

Hey guys. This is a long read but pls check it out. Have you ever reached a point in your life where the big things felt small and the small things felt big? Recently, a lot of traumas and obsessions that I struggled to recover from no longer take up space like they used to. I never once thought that this would be possible. Life is so weird. It’s so strange. It’s such a bizarre moment where you become worried about how long it’ll take to cook a meal, or whether the weather the next day is okay for the activities you have planned. Or anything else that’s mundane and ordinary and It’s such a beautiful point to reach. Guys. Conquering OCD and being able to manage it. Really makes you feel like you can get through anything. To think a few months back I was on the verge of suicide because I felt to my core that I was a monster and I was a threat to everyone I loved. You guys may think you hate yourselves but you are doing something so beautiful for yourselves by trying to get better. I remember the first slither of hope I had and how I really had to hold onto that for dear life. Sometimes my grip slipped but just keep holding out hope. You will, I can just feel it, that you’ll all get better. Looking back it feels like I experienced the same hellish day over and over again just being alone with my thoughts. Now, sometimes they’re still there but like I was saying,they feel so small. You guys are learning about how your mind works. And once you figure it out you know how to manage it for a life time. And that sounds scary but you know how it operates now. You’re learning more about yourself. And a huge component of OCD recovery is learning how to sit with the overwhelming and unbearable and suffocating feelings. And that is such an asset to have. After wailing and weeping for days on end, it feels like no matter what happens next. No matter how traumatising. I know, I truly know that I have space within myself to feel the hard whirlwind of emotions. I know I can bear the intensity of them. And I know that by feeling the height of these emotions, I can get better a lot sooner. I used to feel like I didn’t trust myself and feel a lot of shame when I remember I used to believe my thoughts. But I don’t think so anymore. I really put all my energy in, to the point I was so drained that I was bed bound, trying to argue and grapple with these thoughts. Trying to win my case. I hope you all get to a point in your recovery where the small things feel big and big things feel small, again. <3

I’m super aware of intrusive thoughts and they don’t go away and I don’t know how to make them go away or how to deal with them. And last night I had an urge and was almost going to act on one and that terrified me. I came home and the same thought arhat scared me was still in my mind and it scares me. I’m scared I’m going to lose control and become a bad person because I just don’t know what to do about the thoughts and how I’m capable of these things. I even contemplated about admitting myself to a mental hospital to get help because it’s getting bad and I don’t know how to control it. But I’m scared of doing that because what if I just end up staying in there for the rest of my life. What should I do I’m really scared and worried I may never get better and this is it for me.

currently terrified that despite my diagnosis the other day that I don’t actually have ocd. My symptoms have decreased a lot in severity. I feel a lot better. My thematic fears don’t control me right now as much as they did. I feel like I still get the intrusive thoughts and I hate them but I’m able to go that’s ocd and I feel okay. But now I’m scared I made this up, convinced myself I had it, and tricked my psychologist into diagnosing me with ocd. Can ocd wax and wane? Can it be episodic or increase in severity at different times? I can point out probably around 10 ocd episodes I may have had in my life but between them I’ve been mostly fine except for anxiousness and some depressed moods. Is this something different? Or am I just freaking out and obsessing over whether or not I have ocd now? Agh. Crazy. Idk how to wrap my head around my brain b

Ocd has legit ruined my life. I feel like there’s no hope for me anymore. I don’t know what to do 💔

Oh my god I am crying so hard right now. Because these thoughts of harming my mom are killing me. I really feel like I am gonna do it, like it’s going to happen and like I’m about to commit a crime and oh my god I feel so bad right now because I love my mom!! But I feel like the kind of people that do these things and like I’m about to do it oh my god help i cant with this 😭

Not to offend anyone who is religious but my ocd has made me very anti religious. I feel like I’m a decent person, I asked god for help Multiple times and nothing changes. Idk it just makes it hard to believe in Miracles

Can anyone talk ?

Hello I am looking to start ERP on here with a therapist. I am quite nervous about it incase it doesn't work, I've had BWRT Therapy, CBT privately for months and I'm still horrified and scared of these thoughts. I haven't been officially diagnosed either which leads me down a horrible thought path.. but every therapist I have seen has said I have got harm ocd/pure o. Any advice on starting ERP? Thank you

Has anyone found that in the first couple weeks SSRIs make them more anxious? I was on meds at the beginning of the year for like 3 weeks then I stopped because they made me more anxious and I just started meds again I think it’s having the same affect but I want to keep going with them. Anyone have any experience with this?

I use to say I hated my life because my situation was bad. Parents split, ended up dropping school, working two jobs, paying off debt always being broke. Not really having friends. Only constant was my boyfriend who was a safe space for me which he really isn’t now. No I’m dealing with these intrusive thoughts and other thinking every thought and attaching mean to everything. Wondering if I’ll become these things. I rather go back to those days when I thought my life actually sucked because right now it’s more than sucking. I wish I could go back to worrying about those minor inconveniences. I wish I could fall asleep and not wake up 10 times a night with anxiety. I wish I could sleep on till 12 in the afternoon on my days off. I wish I could wake up with a clear mind, with no intrusive thoughts and no anxiety. I feel so bad for my mom seeing me like this. She was crying last night because I was confused and I afraid as to how I got this bad. She looks at me like what happened to my daughter she was perfectly normal two months ago, she even said that :( I told her I wish I knew how this happened because I don’t like being like this. It’s crazy how just overnight I became this. I hate it and I wish someone could just take it away. I wish someone could just take all of our OCD and intrusive thoughts away. I’m sorry for posting so much negativity on this app. I just want to vent. Maybe I should start journaling instead of venting here.

I’m really freaking out abt what I read but it mentioned Ariel Castro and it was moslty about astrology and p word and how their charts are and it triggered bc what if I’m like that or since some astrology has some destined stuff what if that’s the path I’m destined on and it’s inevitable :( I hate these feelings so much and it just made me connect things to other things and I’m just freaked out It felt like I was gonna cry but I couldn’t :(

Hey guys! I am really sad today because I was doing well for a while, but today I feel like everything is creeping back. If you have Harm OCD, could u please tell me if you relate on what I’m about to say? Please! It sucks being around my family and feel like I’m some sort of psycho in waiting to act on my “”victims””. And right now I’m next to my family, and I feel like there’s this possibility that it could happen right now in this very moment, and it makes me feel so disturbed. So I feel like I’m someone with bad intentions that just hasn’t done anything yet. So I feel like I’m just rejecting this possibility to do something. I feel like I’m in denial and it sucks. It really does suck. So all my support to anyone going through something hard.