- Date posted
- 1y
How do I get Diagnosed? And is any therapist adequate to dealing with OCD?
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How do I get Diagnosed? And is any therapist adequate to dealing with OCD?
I have been with my partner for about a year and 4 months. My ocd symptoms started in February. Recently, my ocd is making me seem annoyed by everything my partner does… I have a bad problem with forming my opinion off of other random people instead of making my own, possibly fear of perception/upsetting people with an opinion so I have to follow like a sheep. This frustrates my partner. My ocd might latch onto a random dark humour joke he made or an opinion for example about social issues that is different to me where we have to agree to disagree and I end up going searching on mainly TikTok. If I see a comment where some people are against what my bf said I have to go and tell him and it’s almost every day my ocd manages to nitpick something. A lot of the time it’s me setting it off by asking his opinion or something where I can feel my ocd being like “let’s scan for things in this conversation to latch on to 😈” and starting a convo where something could trigger my ocd. He might be playing a video game and says things, for example if he’s shot in the game and gets a little bit annoyed. My ocd will instantly latch onto something. I try to hold it back but I ocd tells me I NEED to tell him off for it. If I bring something up while communicating and my boyfriend asks why I think something is bad, it usually always starts with “well I saw a tiktok/instagram comment-…” and my boyfriend stops me to tell me I’m going off a small group of people’s opinion and I need to be able To form my own opinion and it’s okay for me To have my own opinion. A lot of the time I can’t form an opinion because I’m scared what people think so I resort to looking at random peoples comments on posts. 😞 My ocd convinces me he’s a bad person because he has dark humour. Is all the need to confess my thoughts and tell him off ocd? Is the best thing to do sit with the uncomfortableness? Does anyone relate
I’m at a point where I think I can do this but I need help. My primary OCD subtype is ROCD. My girlfriend is wonderful, endlessly supportive of me (I’m Trans and just figuring that out and she’s been so good about it as well as still being with me after I went to the mental hospital) and easily the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve recently had the discovery of what my OCD cycle is (that being that literally whatever I think of her the intrusive thought is the opposite and then the compulsion is to think the opposite of that and it goes into a spiral). This has made me realize that me saying I love her or that I don’t love her are both intrusive thoughts in their own specific contexts. I love her very deeply and that’s why I’m asking for help. Those of us who also suffer from ROCD, for intrusive thoughts about breaking up with her, as that is a major one that I can’t seem to shake, what is your ERP for that? As supportive as she is I don’t want to like mime out the scenario with her as that just feels wrong, so what are things you guys do to combat these feelings? I know that OCD is “the Doubting Disease”, so usually if I doubt something positive in my life I know it’s OCD. So please, if you’ve had similar thoughts to mine, tell me how you handle it. Most of my ERP has been for my more minor obsessions like symmetry or even numbers, we haven’t tackled ROCD much. My therapist is also learning about OCD with me but he has helped me a lot and honestly I owe the man the sanctity of my family but that’s a whole other story. I’ll stop rambling. Hit me with your stories!
I feel like cancel culture is the enemy of OCD. It goes against everything so many of us have difficulty accepting- forgiveness, self-improvement, and feeling like a morally good person. Does anybody else get severely triggered by people being “cancelled” over small things and thinking: “That could be me someday”
I have been with my bf for a year and a few months. I started to get symptoms of ocd in February. It started with the random need to confess things. One of these things was that I’m convinced I cheated over a year ago (Before I was with my current partner). Basically when I was 16 I ended up talking to 2 people at the same time and sending lewd pictures to both without either knowing. I didn’t really know what I was doing at the time and didn’t really think about it. The first dude seemed to like me but then got confusing and I took it as him just playfully joking around eventually, then another dude messaged me and seemed serious. With the serious dude i wouldn’t say it was 100% a proper relationship more like a situationship there wasn’t really any boundaries or anything “official” set, more just sexual stuff, flirting and nicknames type stuff. Eventually the jokey seeming dude found out about serious dude and shouted at me a bit and I stopped talking to him, and not even a week later I stopped talking to serious dude because unfortunately I found out I was being groomed by him. I didn’t really think about this situation at all up until February when I confessed it to my bf. I confessed to him but he was fine and wouldnt say it was exactly cheating. I have asked for reassurance that he’s okay with the situation over 6 times since confessing. My ocd is trying to tell me he is trying to convince himself I didn’t cheat 😞. There was another situation right at the start in the talking stage with my bf before we were together. A diff guy liked me and wanted to start going into a talking stage. I sort of said yes/maybe but I just couldn’t get myself to like that guy to be in a relationship with him. The guy found out about my bf and that we started talking and got mad so I blocked him. My ocd is trying to tell me if that didn’t happen I’d still talk to that guy too aswell as my bf 🥹do I need to tell myself “look, he’s blocked! Nothing happened and you are loyal to your boyfriend. “ I had a scenario that set this overthinking off, it involved something like “I am a loyal person” then my ocd shut the thought down immediately and shoved the 2 scenarios in this post in my face…. It won’t let go of it I can never call myself a good person I’ll always have guilt and feel like I don’t deserve good
Does anyone else tell themselves "don't do 'this' or something bad will happen!" or if something bad does happen you go "it's because I did 'this' thing beforehand" and you end up avoiding a lot of stuff you really enjoy? I get in a bad habit of it. I assume some stuff is cursed, in a sense, even if it's something as mundane as using something in video game or eating a certain food.
OCD is so strange because I feel so mentally exhausted 24/7 but i’m so good at masking it that like it’s like i can think double. I’m not sure that makes sense. But i am so used to the OCD thoughts racing through my head that i can respond to my environment whilst completely existing in my head. I can have conversations when intrusive thoughts are taking over my inner dialect. I feel like i am even doubting whether i have OCD and whether it’s all just an excuse. I feel like my rumination hasn’t stopped for the past 3 years. Everything i used to enjoy or look forward to, is now dread and tainted by the thoughts telling me i never knew. I don’t even know what i like or who i am anymore. The thought of getting help and talking through it all scares me because what if i’m invalidated or if i speak about it too much then what if i don’t stop thinking. I’m so exhausted
I’m crying and panicking right now because I previously made a post about moral scrupulosity ocd and how it focuses on my partners jokes and I got an answer that triggered me very badly. I put that he used to say very “offensive/dark” jokes but I made him aware a while ago that some were too far and he realised/acknowledged it was wrong it and stopped and also thinks they are weird now too. He did it because he was influenced by past friends. He still makes some dark jokes but not on the same level as he used to and my ocd nitpicks them and I feel like I have to tell him off for every joke just cause I see a small handful of people on the internet be offended. The smaller jokes used to pass over my head but since my ocd symptoms it latches onto everything he does. I’m not sure if someone read my post wrong and thought my bf was continuing to make the old jokes he used to make but it looked like they were saying my bf is a really bad person which is extremely triggering for my partner focused rocd :( Whenever I see people comment things on my post that my ocd wants to hear I get reassured (I am aware that isn’t good for ocd 😞) and this is the first time I’ve seen the complete opposite and it’s what my ocd doesn’t want to hear and I got sent into a very bad panic. Is me reacting this way part of ocd??
I have done lots of “bad/problematic/immoral” stuff in my past. My ocd latches onto this so badly :( I have a large social media platform and usually get 20k-100k views quite often. The stuff I did in the past was probably “cancel-worthy” stuff. I have the constant urge + scenarios in my head to make a video “confessing” that I’m a bad person and I deserve to be cancelled although I realised the stuff I did in the past was bad and I don’t do them anymore. The things could range from months ago to stuff when I was a child. Seeing famous people get cancelled is triggering for me and if I see someone being cancelled for something I’ve done in my past I get so scared and anxious and start searching and ruminating. I have a constant feeling of guilt that I’ll never be perfect or be able to call myself a “good person” My ocd also focuses on my partner. He used to say Offensive jokes and more but I made him aware and he realised and stopped. He still makes occasional jokes nowhere near as bad as he used to but when he makes a joke my brain is suddenly like “oh no what if people think that joke is problematic” and because I saw like one person on TikTok be offended by something similar, I feel the need to immediately tell my boyfriend that he shouldn’t say the joke and it makes him frustrated because it’s almost every day my ocd is nitpicking for anything slightly “bad”. He means no harm with the jokes and doesn’t make the same ones he used to as he matured more and realised they were weird but my ocd wants him to be an absolutely perfect person with perfect morals whatever and he isnt allowed to do anything even slightly bad or he’s an awful person. And same for me, I need to be perfect. Anyone else relate? And does this sound like moral scrupulosity ocd?
After a huge death at a relatively young age, followed by many years of cheating and emotional abuse almost directly after, I’ve been plagued with retroactive jealousy (I just found out this is a thing but it is sadly me to a complete T) and fears that partner is going to die. The retroactive jealousy is mostly me acting out compulsions that have slowly become a daily thing over the last two years. I’ve been checking my partners exes instagram and multiple of their social medias every day. Usually as soon as I wake up. I can’t help but see what they’re doing. It doesnt help that they’re so much like me but not. I can’t help but see them as better. Again, it’s been going on for almost two years now and I was wondering if anyone has any good advice on how to stop caring or to switch my mindset? I’ve tried to be open with my partner but I don’t think they understand how much I’m comparing myself and how much it’s effecting me. It makes me not even want to get up and do stuff for myself. On the other end with the thoughts of death, I want to stay with my partner but I always get so scared they will pass away sooner than later, or that I will once we start our lives together. If I don’t text them goodnight or “get home safe” or check their locations when they’re going home then I’ll have horrible anxiety and feel like something bad will happen. It’s also starting to affect my day to day. I know I’m asking for advice on very huge subjects but I appreciate anything! Thank you so much for reading. This is my first time using this app so I hope I’m using this correctly !
Hi! I love this app, I’ve found ways to really help myself be better! But I also know studying and all this is slowly becoming a compulsion? Anyway, I’m thinking maybe I just want to know more? I’m not diagnosed don’t get me wrong, but I can’t help but relate SO MUCH. Anyway, I was wondering if anyone can recommend YouTube channels? And maybe more social groups? I’m 27 so id like to be in a social group with ppl my age range please!
I have partner focused rocd and I have been with my bf for over a year now and we have engaged in sexual stuff obviously, my ocd has randomly latched onto consent?? Like there has been times where my bf asked to do something sexual and I’ve just made “unsure noises” and he has said “please” a couple of times and I did the sexual thing. I was fine throughout the sexual acts and wasn’t really uncomfortable but my ocd is trying to convince me I was uncomfortable. My boyfriend and I have autism and sometimes struggle understanding things and need straight forward/clear answers. My boyfriend said a few times he’s said “please” or asked me to do something else after I didn’t say yes is because he wasn’t sure what I was giving off wether I was not wanting to do it or if I was just thinking. The times he’s said please he took it as me thinking. I do see why he would be unsure as sometimes I don’t give a straight forward yes or no sometimes because I am awkward. I asked him if I need to be clearer with saying no because I am a bit of a people pleaser and he said yes and it’s completely okay if I say no and he will be fine if I ever say no and I can make it clear and I don’t sound “mean”. A lot of the time I have low motivation because of ADHD and I might be unsure/can’t be arsed to do it but then he does something and I enjoy it and want to do more because it gave me motivation. My ocd still tries to convince me it’s bad??? Also my boyfriend sometimes does playful silly stuff like smack my behind when I’m infront of him and I do it back and it’s funny but sometimes my ocd is like “omg he didn’t ask that’s really bad!” My boyfriend has said if he does something I don’t want him to do in that moment I can just say no. My ocd constantly tries to make him a bad person. Can Anyone relate/help?
Currently really struggling with horrible Harm OCD thoughts, images, and I guess…urges? Like it *feels* like my body actually WANTS me to do the horrible things I’m seeing in my head or that it would be a relief to??? This is where I’m getting stuck on “this is not OCD” because of the absolutely awful content, and the actual urges I feel in my body. It feels like it wants and would be okay with doing things to my loved ones that I would never in 1000 years actually think was okay. It’s scaring the hell out of me. I feel like it’s real and I actually would/will do these things. I get this feeling in my chest, head and arms…what IS this? Does anyone else get it? Does anyone ever act on it? Please help. I feel like it would almost be a relief to do them and it’s making me want to commit myself to an institution.
I need help really badly. I’m very deep into an ROCD spiral, I haven’t slept all night and it’s 4 30 in the morning. I really really don’t think I love my boyfriend of 11 months. I want to so badly I’ve never felt like this before. I’m only 15 but he’s really the love of my life and I’m losing him because of these thoughts and feelings. I can’t even tell if it’s ROCD or just how I feel. I want it to stop so so badly. I just want to love him again. I don’t feel ready to give up yet but I feel like I do but I don’t want to want that. How can I get the thoughts to stop and how do I live him again. I don’t want anyone else to be with him ever but I want him to be happy . He didn’t do anything wrong and he loves me so so so much and I feel so guilty. I’m not able to see him for a week because he’s spending some time with a friend who he hasn’t seen in years but I only feel better when I’m with him. I’m so terrified. Id rather die than not love him. I can think of our general relationship and it was so so perfect before the thoughts and it brings me comfort to know I still have that relationship, but when I think of him as a person I really don’t think I love him. It’s always the one same thought to that I don’t love him, occasionally I’m worried that we’re going to break up. I can’t tell if I miss him, I don’t think I do but I want to. None of the hospitals or councillors or helplines are calling back. How do I love him again please help me. I’m scared it’s not ROCD and I just don’t love him but I’ve lived him since we were 11 and I’m autistic and I don’t like change so maybe I’m just worried how things will change. I’m so severely depressed and I need him. I need it to stip and I need to love him again. I need help please help me love him again
Back in January 2023, a guy 2 years younger ( gap was 14 and 16) started to like me and I ended up getting attached to him. There was some flirting. If I remember correctly the MOST I sent was pictures of my thighs. He also asked if he could use my pics that I had posted on social media to do “stuff” to so I just said yes. I never asked for any pictures from him. People on the internet really scare me and say that 2 years is grooming and really weird and it scares me so much that I’m a bad person even though I regret it and wouldn’t do it again. I have quite a big platform on social media and get 20k-100k views quite often. Seeing popular people being cancelled is triggering. My OCD makes me feel like I need to post a video “confessing” what I’ve done and that I’m a bad person and I’m problematic and deserve to be cancelled…. Even though it was over a year ago and I regret it. Did I do anything wrong? My ocd tells me I’m a horrible groomer :( please help
A week or so ago and I never expected to be doing it during comprehensive DBT but here we are... It's a good thing my therapist has literally been through the OCD/ERP ringer herself. Anyway, I did my first exposure yesterday and I didn't expect the meta-obsessions to come up so rapidly but they did, and in a cursedly-large number, as did all the other mental compulsions, and then perfectionism about "Am I even doing this right?! Am I doing it 'well enough'? Will it even work? What if I'm wasting my time and I don't even have OCD?!" The thoughts were racing at many points and I was overwhelmed; I looked up ways to ruin mental compulsions and while on Google I realized I was forgetting that not all my thoughts were rituals, but also obsessions...and then I got distracted for a few minutes reading stuff about ERP before going back to my exposure. And it struck me that at least part of googling stuff was probably a ritual. Lmfao. My perfectionism obsession wanted to strike out those 10-15 min. and pick up from where I left off before, i.e., extend the whole thing to an hour and fifteen minutes, but I denied it that satisfaction... The whole exposure seemed to go really off track from where it started, which was writing something down on my DBT diary card, and my thoughts kept trailing off that whole thing. Is that expected with exposures? It was mostly automatic so I just kept bringing my attention back again and again to what I was doing. I was and continue to be so bewildered by the whole experience lmfao. I expected a bumpy road and curveballs to boot but not quite so numerous :')
Hey guys, I’ve recently had a relapse in my OCD. I felt like coming on and maybe sharing some of my events so maybe it will help someone feel a little less alone and to get some advice. I have ROCD and Harm OCD. My harm OCD started at 16 years old, I was shown a disturbing video in class one time.. My teacher was supposed to show us the animated version but she showed us the real version. It was truly terrifying. Following that, i started having intrusive thoughts.. of things I would absolutely never want to do. I didn’t know what intrusive thoughts were at the time. I struggled with feeling so alone, crazy.. and so on. I was too afraid to tell anyone because i thought people would think i’m crazy because I thought I did. I finally reached out to my dad about it and he welcomed me with open arms. He told me about his anxiety journey and that he has had anxiety all of his life. Following that I went to the doctor, my doctor started me on Zoloft. I was on that for 2 years and my anxiety improved tremendously. After 2 years I decided to stop taking it due to weight gain, and that I felt better and didn’t struggle with my anxiety or intrusive thoughts anymore. I met my now Fiancé and my OCD transferred into ROCD. I obsessed and worried every single day that he was going to leave me for the past year and a half. Once he proposed, my worries went away, I guess my mind was proven that he wasn’t going to leave. So it went away. A couple of weeks later after we got engaged, I got triggered. I was on a trip with my future in laws and his father brought a g*n. I started having intrusive thoughts about harming them or myself. Had a very bad panic attack. I have been struggling since. I avoid the kitchen, tell my fiancé to put away knives… I feel the need to isolate but at the same time I don’t want to be alone. I have thoughts about the people that are close to me and that I love. Which makes it so much worse. I finally decided to share my story after an extremely rough night last night. I woke up in the middle of the night, had a HUGE panic attack due to my thoughts. Every single time I have a thought I panic, I feel butterflies in my stomach, start to uncontrollably shake..my brain gets so loud and I feel nothing but like straight fear. It’s like my body and brain reacts as if it’s trying to run away from itself but I can’t escape my head. Which in a way makes me feel better because i think “oh well i’m scared as crap of these thoughts which means i don’t want to do them”. It kind of keeps me going because i know real people who have these thoughts enjoy them… but of course my anxiety and ocd goes “well how do you know you don’t enjoy them” and I just go down a rabbit hole. Then if I have a thought, and i don’t get scared over it.. I get scared that I didn’t get scared. 🤦🏼♀️ I just pray that they go away, I even get scared that with Zoloft i’m like “what if they don’t go away because it’s really what you want”. My brain is on high alert, everything is a trigger. My fiancé has been an absolute rock star and has helped me through every second of it. He is my biggest supporter and so understanding. Then I’ll have intrusive thoughts about him! I’m just at a place right now where I could use some hope. I want my zoloft to get rid of them completely. This has been so crippling. Im on day 4 of Zoloft, I know it isn’t working yet. If anyone has any advice, suggestions, or literally just anything. I would appreciate so so much.
Hi so today I feel ok and really terrible at the same time. I realized that I feel fine and dandy at moments with friends and totally strangers but with my family I put on this almost act of suffering around them from my guilt but as my parents talked to me about it too it seems like I am manipulating them. And I feel weird because going back to my blow up I think I could have been okay I just chose to let it all go and out because regulating myself was tiring and I didn’t even notice how bad my persecution’s became. I’m not sure what to do now because now I’m living a very different life with my family and I feel like I am kinda being a manipulative fraud despite me wanting the complete opposite. My actions don’t align with my good intentions I want. I can watch YouTube videos and talk with friends and strangers but I can’t do that with my family?? Even I think it’s weird. I need help because I’m starting to believe my thoughts of who I am and that is not good because I am a good person. Not a bad one I know it but am not showing it.
Im just so confused about the attraction. I feel like i’ve never really felt sexual attraction towards someone, or maybe i did i just dont remember. I personally dont really think im asexual. Maybe this is reassurance seeking but how does real attraction, or sexual attraction feels like? Im scared that my admiration for woman was actually attraction?😔 even though i had no sexual or romantic fantasies or desires with them. I can tell if a woman is pretty or attractive but i’ve never had any desire to date one. And it scares me. Like what if i’ve never been attracted to a guy? I dont even remember how does it feels like. Im so fu*ked up, like im 20 years old, my last crush was when i was 13 on a guy (even that my ocd makes me doubt) and i have these thoughts since 14. It got me in this early age when everyone around me were experiencing crushes and i DID NOT.
How do I know if it's rocd or how I actually feel? I don't want to lose him because I know id never find another person like him. I am only 15 but I really did feel that he was the love of my life before the thoughts. I still feel like he is but I feel like I don't love him. Every single person in my life tells me that the way I act around him hasn't changed at all. We've been together for 11 months and this has only been an issue after I stopped taking the microgynon 30 birth control pill about a month and a half ago. I only took it for 6 weeks to help with my period pains. Id never thought about not loving him before. I just want to love him again. I've never been happier than before this. I've been in love with him since we met when we were 11 and it only took him 3 years to ask me out. I don't want to lose him or the future we planned together, or his family or his cats. I just really don't feel like I love him and when I'm really deep in a spiral I can't tell if I even want to love him. I just want it back and I wish this never happened to me. Please help me love him again
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