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Help! If you can’t picture yours or your partners body parts and bodies perfectly in your head does that mean you’re picturing someone else’s body or body parts or that you’re turned on over someone else? Please let me know I worry because I would never get off or feel turned on by anyone else but I feel confused when I haven’t pictured something perfectly 100% does it mean what I’m worried about??

Does anyone else think TikTok is the biggest trigger, for all my themes! I also get triggered so much by ‘late bloomers’ I just watched a tik tok of a women who came out later in life and the comment section was full of so many comments like I was married for 10 years, 40 years, 20 years etc and it just triggered me so much I feel like I want to cry, even thought right now I don’t feel like one I’m so scared I’ll realise it later in life or that I’m just hiding it And it brings in so much guilt incase I am because I have a boyfriend and don’t want to ruin his life if later in life I do realise I am

I will be ruminating and checking images/thoughts/ "video like images" in my head and i always feel like some sort of.. what i call an "excitement jolt" inside. This makes me want to check and ruminate more and i start to spiral and think well if my body reacts for this and not this then it must be true or if I react more to one image than the other (for example, being more attracted to women then my boyfriend) I don't know if that makes sense at all but does anyone else struggle with this?

Does anyone know how I can treat my false memory ocd? I am worrying about whether I betrayed my Partner or not. At one point, I thought I killer someone. I dont know how to handle it anymore

Hi all! I have had a variety of OCD themes such as Relationship OCD, Homosexual OCD, Transgender OCD, etc. I have a few experiences that I'm wondering if anyone has been through/can shed light on as well: -I feel as if I have a constant feeling that I need to analyze whether or not I'm 100% happy at any given moment. For example I think: "Am I truly happy? Am I experiencing life the right way? If I look around am I experiencing life with 100% clarity?" -One of my themes is stronger/more persistent than the others. And as such it makes me more fearful that it must be true. My Homosexual OCD was the first to manifest and as such I feel like it has ultimate power over me. I also used to experiment with Gay Porn when I was younger but I never felt it was "serious" nor have relationships with men interested me in real life. But I feel as if I am hyperaware of when I find another male attractive yet the thought of sexual intercourse with them doesn't appeal to me. (I'm in a very lucky and lovely relationship with my Fiancé btw). And I find myself analyzing moments of emotion with her. When I cry over something out of joy with her I feel like a fraud, like I am forcing myself to do so. But I've had genuine moments when I imagine our wedding day together alone in my car, I cry because I'm overcome with joy. -How to properly do ERP exercises. I usually attempt to let my thoughts flow like a stream and try not to attach meaning to them. I also try to force myself to imagine scenarios that are incredibly fearful in an effort to desensitize myself which only makes me feel as if I'm actually starting to like the thoughts and then they become an overwhelming, confusing wave. Thanks so much for reading! I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts and I sincerely love and appreciate your time. I hope we can all be in this together! :)

rocd is ruining me and my life and my relationship. i feel so disconnected from my boyfriend bc of it and it’s so frustrating but i also feel so numb that i can’t even feel frustrated or upset or anxious or anything bad when the bad thoughts come bc it’s been so excessive over the past couple of months. i don’t feel anything like i use to and i just wish i could love him peacefully and purely the way i use to with no worry or doubt. i feel like he deserves better bc my mind is constantly telling me i want someone else secretly or makes over analyze anything and everything with him or about him and creates so much doubt in my mind. it feels so real to the point that i feel like i’m betraying him and even though i’m not actually DOING anything to him or behind his back or anything it feels like i would be lying and deceiving him to continue being a good girlfriend and just being good to him if that makes sense. like when i’m actually with him or talking to him it’s mostly good im not thinking badly too much but as soon as he’s gone it all comes and it feels like i’m hiding a different, bad, personality from him when he’s not around. he’s such a good person and i’ve done everything to be so good to him bc i want to and he deserves it all. but inside i feel like don’t know myself at all anymore. i want to get past it but i feel like even if i do i’ll feel like i’m hiding a past betrayal from him. i don’t want to lose him. can anyone help with any of this or share ways they’ve gotten past this.

Hello everyone, it has been a while since I used this app, because I've taken the time to really improve my OCD by myself and things have been working significantly better than before. A little context of the reason I started my recovery: I've had OCD for 13 years since I was 8 ( I'm 21 now) was raised in a dysfunctional household in which my parents got bad advice from my childhood therapists which led to me being put on medication which made my symptoms worse, led to me being instutionalized 3 times when I was 12, and almost led to an incourigibility hearing ( which backfired on my parents because the court called CPS) long story short in early January of this year I got into a brief fight with my brother which led to him getting angry and calling the police, and even though he didn't want to charge me, the cops took me in jail anyway and the courts charged me under the state with disorderly person and gave me a year probation. My time in jail really made me want to change my ways. Before my arrest, I was so scared to do anything because of my OCD and spent most of my time in my room and I occasionally worked at my towns park system. I was so lucky to be assigned by a therapist by the court who didn't want to force me on medication or give terrible advice to me. She did what no other therapist did before then, actually listened to me and had compassion. She gave me the boost to want to improve my life. Now I'm able to drive on highways without fearing death, not worry about keeping the same routine everyday, and do and try new things I have never done before, like online dating. I went on a dating app where you could find women from all over the world. Most of the matches I got were scams or not compatible, but eventually I found a wonderful girl from the country of Cambodia. I got her Instagram and eventually we fell for eachother. We now call eachother pretty much everyday for up to four hours and text all the time on how much we love each other. Now I am making plans to meet her in July and go to her friends wedding in her country. I have never been so happy but my parents do not support me and try to make me think that this is all a scam and that she's trying to take my money even though she has never asked for money and I have had multiple voice and video calls with her. Luckily her friend who is getting married boyfriend is also American so he is gonna help me and give me tips for what to do in the country later in the week. I'm so fortunate that probation gave me permission to go and visit there in the summer. So that has been my the last 2 months of my OCD recovery, I still have a lot to work on but I felt like I have conquered so much with myself even though my family doesn't even care. If you have read all of my rambling, sincerely, thank you, I could talk all day about my OCD recovery. If anyone at NOCD corporate wants me to be a spokesperson for their company or invite me to upcoming NOCD events, I would be forever grateful. I feel like as a recovering sufferer of OCD that I have a unique perspective on my OCD compared to others I have seen on this app and I would love to share with others on a Public stage Again, I thank everyone who took their time to read my rambling and good luck on your own OCD journey

Hello. My wedding is fast approaching, and my OCD has ramped up. It’s wild how sometimes OCD can really make you feel cut off from yourself, and how you have to put your relationship to your feelings in a difference context. I haven’t quite figured out how to do that yet. I have noticed that my intrusive thoughts/worries/feelings seem to focus on two major fears, attraction and whether God wants us to marry, and when one of those seems reassured enough to experience some more excitement and joy, the other pipes up. I’m still doing all the things I need to do to get ready for the wedding, and I’m communicating with my fiancé every day. I’m not avoiding those things. I know I care deeply about him. It’s just hard not to put meaning into some of the things I feel, and I end up being in just this resigned state some days, wondering if I will ever feel truly connected with my emotions and able to trust how I feel again someday, or not. I’m posting in case someone else can relate. That numb feeling is the worst; when you feel hollow. And then your OCD asks you how long you’ve felt that way, and downplays anything else you may have felt. I really do want to be in a different, more positive mindset in this time of wedding preparation. The stakes of my fears seem so high. And yet, I know I’m not turning around. I just…want to feel more prepared emotionally.

Hi guys, do you ever feel, even when the anxious feelings are gone (and your not in the back door spike window) that you still dont know who you are and what you're afraid of ( for instance in this case, not being straight) is actually true and that whole OCD cycle you're in might or might not be OCD but it doesnt matter because you're just using it as a way of proving that what you're feeling is normal and not actually face the truth? these are my thoughts right now... I was doing well, but even when I am doing well I still think about those stuff idk... like how do I know what true love is? am I faking my love for my bf and one day I'll be tired and actually just "want to accept the truth because its lighter?" becaus at that point I really feel like I'm in a movie and just playing the role of someone. Between renée rapp coming out as a lesbian after saying she was bi and sophia bush an Chrishell stause falling in love with women after being with men all their life its been kind of a triggering week (even tho when I learned it felt like I was happy like yes! they're a part of the lgbtq+ community as if I was part of that community too which triggered me even more) PS : no disprespect to anyone I'm just really triggered and confused!!

Hello. I've been struggling with OCD for a very long time and about 6 years ago I got divorced after being married for a very long time and I often feel like I am very alone because I don't have anyone to talk to about this like I used to be able to talk to my ex-husband about it. I always feel very lonely now and find it particularly hard whatever my anxiety gets very high and sometimes you just really crave a hug from the right person. I've wondered if I used that as a compulsion in my marriage to know that everything would be okay. But I also know that that's just part of having a partner is that sometimes you just need that and I don't have that anymore. I am 43 and I don't want to spend the rest of my life alone but sometimes I'm scared that if I do find someone else I will latch on to them and use them to seek reassurance that everything will be okay. I hate being alone how do you all navigate dating and telling someone about your OCD and themes?

Hi everyone. I am in a sort of situationship with someone I really care about. My OCD has been spiking around our relationship, and it’s been hard. We have been talking about taking a break - and it’s been very triggering for me. I’ve been ruminating, and checking messages and socials, and seeking reassurance a lot. It feels like a “right person wrong time” situation and I am not dealing well with this uncertainty. Has anyone else dealt with this? And does anyone have advice for how to get through this?

Even though I know that an instrusive thought can be a thought that has become a compulsion and disturbs us, I cant just tell this to myself and move on. What I mean by move on is that I didn't say that just think that and forget about it, I mean like proces cuz its not easy. I can see the perspective of others when I read on this app and can tell that its ocd, but I cabt just tell myself and say that its an instrusive thought about this one thing. Or I can, but I also cant I cant explain it. For instance, Im telling myself it is but when it comes to writing it down here, it feels wrong because what if the thought is real. But if it hasnt still went away, it probably isnt a part of me right?. It might be ROCD. So I can try to tell about the thought without mentioning it because it feels like mentioning it will make things worse. from the moment I had it I have had this guilt feeling because I know Id never think that but it just came and makes me feel guilty even though its a thought that is the opposite of what Ive always thought, it always disturbs me and I feel guilty and like a betrayer for thinking such thing. Since I guess that I dont trust my thoughts I cant really help myself. Its not a severe thought right now but it used to be worse but it never went away. I feel like Ill always feel guilty about it my whole life and will never get over it. Even right now my mind is telling me not to write about it here because its just not good for me to not because it isnt in reality. And right now my mind is telling me that I cannot be sure that Im actually telling the right stuff, maybe Im just saying these to be saying it and it keeps going on. I always talk to an AI because I go to my psychiatrist once in a month and I left therapy. I just need reassurance...

I cannot help but feel guilty for my partner having to deal with my changing emotions. The thought of they would be better off without me and I’d be better off alone were pretty high today. We got into a very silly fight today, leading to a lot of emotions and long conversation( ended up being a good convo, but also a hard one ). No matter the problem tho it sends me into a spiral about what I feel or if I even want this. I don’t mean to be like this, and I feel bad that my partner even has to put up with it. He has done his absolute best at understanding what I’m going through and 90% of the time works to talk me down - which no one has ever done -. It’s new to both of us. I just don’t know how to escape the guilt of him having to put up with my triggers and uncertainty… scared he will get fed up with it at some point and I don’t want to drag him through the mud due to my own issues: considering I also don’t know how to recognize or deal with it. just a rant or maybe if you have advice idek.. I assume some could relate

Hello I'm in a bit of a situation here I met a girl in a gourp of ocd help on facebook last week She's cool and we started talking But everything escalated quickly She started to ask me for pictures of me smiling And asking a lot of information about me Yeah nothing so bad Just getting to know each other We get to the point of sending nudes And idk I discovered Well she told me she's addicted to alcohol and Xanax And she started acting really weird Obsessive She got mad if I didn't answer Manipulative Today she took a big dose of Xanax just because I didn't answer her message And this is scaring me I don't know how to get out of this situation I feel scared and abused She studied laws I mean probably there's no way she would do anything against me But also I'm worried if I leave her she'd commit suicide or something

Is this an OCD thing: just the general sense of worry or dread something bad may happen in the future? For example: planning a trip, and the thought "you could die by then!" Or something similar but related to loved ones?

Hello all! Please share a small success you experienced this week before it ends! Here are mine: -I went to a park full of kids (no intrusive thoughts and rumination) -Spent quality time with partner and stopped myself from ruminating -started eating normally again -Did not miss therapy

I'm worried my partner is searching for problems in our relationship when I'm asleep and when I wake up she has a new manifested issue to deal with. Yesterday we were on a video call as I fell asleep as she was at work but she hung up randomly and started sending odd texts like "I know what you did" turns out she had called a random number she had decided was the woman I am cheating on her with (I am absolutely not cheating) and called that number while we were on the phone, this hanging up the call she took this as undeniable proof that I am in fact cheating on her and was calling this stranger and has been not stop accusing me of cheating with them all day Ive tried explaing what happened and she says I'm gaslighting her so I'm really at a loss what to do rn I feel like our relationship is doomed if this keeps up tbh

Has anyone ever had an accepting response when telling a partner? I don’t feel like I can be honest because I’m afraid they’ll leave me for being a monster or just never see me the same

Any success stories with ROCD and ERP? Would love some encouragement❤️

Hi all. I'm not sure who will see this or what will come of it, but I am just so tired. I'm someone who struggles with too many things and keeps myself in continuous distress for god knows what reason. I've convinced myself that the distress fuels me, but I know it's tearing me down. While I don't particularly enjoy my normal ocd symptoms of worry, doubt, failure, and needing balance, my relationship ocd has been much worse. For me, my rocd takes on the form of friendships, not partnerships. My one friend has been my rock for nearly 2 years and it's been a great friendship until someone else showed up. In my head, there's not enough room for both of us and I'm convinced my friend will realize this new person is better than me and I will just end up thrown aside. I've talked about it with my friend and she understands where I'm coming from and why I feel threatened, but that she feels this new person as an addition. I don't have any negative thoughts about her close friends before me because we are all separated, but this new one and I are in the same area (in grad school) which feels like a direct threat. I've told her I don't want to talk about this new person and what I need out of our friendship. She's fine at reassuring me when I bring it up to her, but I'm afraid I'm going to drive her away. I can hardly talk to her or look at her right now because I feel like I'm going to scream every time I hear this new person's name or know that they're together. And she hasn't said anything, but I know she has been taking her space recently. I hate feeling this way and I hate how much space in my mind this is taking up, but I care for her and our friendship so much and feel that I am at a loss and don't know what to do.