Some things that helped me with OCD: • Exposing yourself to your fears, like really exposing yourself fully, helps (I haven’t done professional ERP, just my own exposures). You might be fearful you’re going to “like” your thoughts, but that’s just OCD trying even harder. Try exposing yourself. • Lots of “mental health advice” you might hear or see doesn’t always apply to people struggling with OCD. In fact, most things I read (like “trust your intuition”), definitely does not apply. • Humans have anywhere between 12,000 and 60,000 thoughts a day, and MANY of them are negative! Truth is, 99% of thoughts are automatic or random, and don’t mean anything about who we are.
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
I have hit rock bottom and it hurts. I have never felt more isolated, more alone. I won't see another soul until Tuesday and I cannot take my meds because if I touch them, I won't be able to touch them again. my first two ERP therapists canceled, so now I have to wait until Wednesday for my intake. any tips on how to get through the next few days?
"There's no point in trying to wrestle a thoughts while you're in survival brain" - Dr Russel Kennedy This quote helped me a lot. Hope it can help others.
Gahhhh I keep having these stupid dreams about another guy being with me instead of my partner and it's really triggering my ROCD 😭 I want it to stop. It's making me nervous. I've never seen the guys in my dream EVER in my life (they're different every night) and they're making me believe it's a sign that I'm not in the right relationship even though my relationship is perfect and I want nobody else besides my partner. Does anybody else have these dreams? Can anyone suggest anything to help them stop? They're really triggering me...
Hiya! Does anyone know the costs per session for someone in the Uk? Are they half hour or hour long sessions please? Thanks :)
GUYS PLEASE HELP ME ITS URGENT. so today my friend came out as bi. I wanted to know if it would help me with my hocd. She said that she is 15 and she didnt think about liking a girl before. Shes okay with being bi but afraid of the world. EVEN IM 15. I've had hocd but I dont wanna be bi or gay. Even when I say this, it feels like I'm lying. I cried about it alot yesterday. I dont wanna be bi please help me get rid of this. And I no longer have any evidence that I'm not bi cuz I thought that I was straight before and so did she but then she turned out to be bi. Please help
Hey you guys i need some advice There’s this super cute boy in my class that I do think is cute (i hope) and idk if im attracted to him, but he asked me on a date and idk if i should go. I want to but i feel like im forcing myself, and i’ve been avoiding dating cause of all this and i just dunno what to do
my ocd has been annoying today. just doing little things and my brain is saying well what if i do this and then this bad thing happens. and then if i don’t do the compulsion then i get these chills and a queasy feeling until i do it. it’s so exhausting. hope everyone is having a good day :)
Can obsessions be delusional? They feel so real sometimes I believe them, but I hear most people with OCD know the obsessions aren’t based in reality. I’m so confused by this.
Tw hocd It just feels like denial man, it really does. Im getting warmish feelings for guys and this is when I dont even have guy friends, Im pretty sure Ill start liking them for real once I do make some friends. But I dont feel normal, my state of mind isnt what it used to be. Me when ocd first started is different than me of today. My brain is so fried from all the anxiety attacks etc. I dont even have ocd anymore, just feels like a crisis. Idk what to do man, I still have anxiety on a daily basis, paired with depression and maybe derealization, Im unable to do most things.
I can’t like a person anymore without thinking that means I’m attracted to them. It’s like I’m analyzing how I feel too and questioning. I have a new co worker who is now a friend and she’s a lesbian. It happens with her the most and I wish it would stop. 😞 how is anything supposed to go back to how it was before? Especially when I have so many intrusive images of anybody that walks by and the groinal responses.
How do people deal with shame and guilt from real event or false memory ocd?
Does anyone else get super upset and have their entire day thrown off if one little thing goes not according to plan? This morning I woke up super happy and excited to get stuff done today. But long story short I thought a meeting I was looking forward to was at 10am but it was actually at 9am so I missed it. And now I have not been able to do any of the other things I was excited for and it’s been a few hours. I’m just sitting on the couch frozen. I have no inspiration or motivation now and I hate that this one tiny mishap triggered me into this. Curious if others experience this and if you think it’s OCD related. Thanks!
Im so scared i feel like im realizing im gay and there’s no way i am attracted to men and i’m a complete lesbian & can’t keep repressing it I keep remembering girl characters in like movies and cartoons that i think i had crushes on and thought were so pretty and its just reinforcing that thought i’m a lesbian and providing so much proof
i just came accross a reel that was like "the book of answers" where you ask a question and the person opens a page with the supposed answer, and so i wanted to ask if i was gay but then i went "but last time you came accross something like this they said yes" and so the answer was "yes but don't force it". why am i not panicking??????
Hey guys I feel like my hoocd is getting out of hand and I don’t know what to believe what is true or not the thought are just so real all over a dream does anyone have any advice or anything I can do I’m really struggling . I feel anxious when I’m not at home and I feel panicked when I am at home I just need help am I normal or is theirs Denial I don’t know what’s real anymore I fee so unhappy
so i am a Christian and my Christian values make me feel like that's the reason i am in denial. i love all people and support everyone, but in these 2 years my so-called mentality has changed a lot because of tiktok, like yes i am more open to it and understanding, but i don't feel like myself anymore. i really feel like i am in denial because of that
I’m scared my attraction to men is forced and fake. I feel comfort and security in being a man who loves other men. It’s such an important part of me, what if I’ve just been living a lie this entire time.. Am I forcing myself to be attracted to them? Is my attraction real? But the thought of being in a long term relationship with a woman and “settling down” also doesn’t feel right.
Brothers and sisters, don't despair on bad days, remember the good days and keep in mind that good days can be achieved. Also keep in mind that bad days will come. Bad days cannot undo all the hard work you've been putting in, they alone can't do that, don't give them any power they don't have. When you are having a bad day, see it as an opportunity to put to practice the tools you've gathered in therapy or any other help you've gotten, bad days are training days and the hard work will produce fruit. Good days have come before, and will come again. God bless.
Many of my friends are coming out as bi/ gay. Its freaking me out. I feel like crying. I wish I didnt know about LGBTQ people 😭😭😭😭. Please bring the normal back. I havent lived a normal life since 4 months 😭😭😭😭😭. Someone please help me I'm dying this is so bad. Is it still hocd😭😭😭
can u get burnt out from ocd, it seems like i dont care about anything in my life, im scared about this, i have this strange feeling, idk what it is
I’m trying to do my ERP stuff by affirming that my intrusive thoughts are true or whatever but i’m worried that i’ll start thinking that they are true. i know that this anxiety is part of it but it’s so hard.
To anyone dealing with strong urges to confess specific OCD obsessions, thoughts, urges etc. to their loved ones: When you discuss the details of the OCD with them, you will get some momentary relief but you're also telling your loved ones that the themes, thoughts, past events (whatever they are) matter. That they are meaningful. This is also what the OCD wants you to believe. The truth is they don't. All that matters is that you have OCD and you're doing your best to cope with it. That's all your lived ones need to know. You don't owe anyone the details. No matter how hard the OCD makes you believe you do.
Is it normal my OCD fear thoughts come back in my dreams/ REM sleep at night? It makes me even worse the next day...
Why does it feel like sometimes I feel a strange comfort in my obsessions? Like I hate my obsessions. I hate the them. But when I don’t have them, my mind goes “why aren’t you obsessing?” “You’re not valid in your struggles.” “You’re making this up.” But the obsessions and rumination feels so familiar that it’s a paradoxical comfort but also distressing. It’s like I’m afraid to let go.
My therapist never does ERP with me. We've met several times, but I always do it by myself outside of therapy and find the exposures myself. Is that common?
I am not asking for reassurance, I just need to get this off my chest- I’m sex-repulsed (have always been) and I don’t know why! I can’t stop ruminating about this. How do you deal with rumination? Do you have any tips on being able to stop trying to figure things out?
Can anybody doing contamination ocd please let me know if it's incredibly hard? I just can't seem to push through with ERP. I'm wondering if I'm weaker than others who do ERP.
Does anyone have any resource recommendations for Christians/followers of Jesus and OCD? It doesn’t have to just be for scrupulosity, it can be for all themes.
Does this nightmare ever end
Anyone else have sexual orientation obsessions about fear of being asexual or aromantic? Used to have really bad HOCD but got treatment but I’ve never been in a relationship and fear it I think (feel rly anxious and overwhelmed at the idea of commitment or dating) and ocd has used this as fuel that I’m aromantic or something other and I’ll never have a relationship. So disappointed that I’ve relapsed, this feels so confusing
I really do understand how confused and frustrated you are. To be honest I find it frustrating too. These other practices are saying something about HOCD that is misleading and confusing. Let me try to put things a different way. It's the same thing as I've said before, but maybe I can say it a different way that will make more sense to you. I'll go in the direction of the cancer analogy you used... Imagine if someone came into an anxiety clinic because they were having chest pains. A lot of times, those chest pains would just be anxiety. But not all the time. Sometimes, they would indicate a real medical issue. By the same token, a lot of the times when someone comes in with HOCD, it's just anxiety, but other times there is a real feeling of attraction there. Just like with chest pain, you would have to help the person stop ruminating and feel less anxious, so they can see if they still have chest pain even when they aren't anxious. When other practices say that HOCD means someone isn't gay, it's like saying that anyone with chest pain is just anxious. A lot of the time it's true, but it's incorrect and misleading to say that it is always just anxiety. Someone with HOCD is constantly trying to figure out if the feelings they have are attraction or anxiety, like someone with chest pain trying to figure out if their chest pains are caused by their anxiety. They feel the desperate need to figure it out, but ruminating about it just makes them more confused. Does that analogy help you to understand? In terms of your asking for a link to a case of HOCD that was real, I don't have a specific link to send you unfortunately. I just know from my own and others' clinical experience, not from published articles. If I had something to send you I would. I'm sure if you google hard enough you'll find something, but it seems to be buried underneath all the articles from these other practices telling people they aren't gay. And by the way, it's important that here are articles telling people with HOCD that they might not be gay. Just like it's important that someone can google chest pain and find out it night be anxiety. It's just not okay to say that chest pain is always anxiety, and it's not okay to say that HOCD is always straight. I am so confused just found this article online from an OCD therapist responding to someone. I thought OCD therapist believe this means it’s not true from everything I have read
If someone likes me and wants us get married , should I tell him about my ocd or not ??
I think it’s so funny and ironic that when I start panicking “ what If I have this mental disorder” (despite not having any symptoms) and then panicking as to whether I’ll develop it or not. That this entire process,is textbook OCD.
does anyone else with harm ocd get really bad intrusive thoughts about hurting your pets. i can’t even go into deatail because it’s so hard to say but when i first got my dogs i had awful thoughts about hurting them in horrendous ways. i still get them and it bothers me so much
Today it hit me just how much OCD can distort reality. It’s been a few months since my SOOCD started to ease a lot, and I’m now at a place where I definitely wouldn’t qualify as having the theme (although that’s not to say my mental health is great even without the burden of that theme). My life revolved around the possibility that I was bi but in denial. It was all I thought about. In the shower, in school, with my friends, with my family, walking down the street, shopping, eating, and even sleeping. I was so fixated on the possibility, that it started to manifest into a reality, through groinals, intrusive thoughts and a whole host of unwanted feelings. I wasn’t myself, at all. But nobody was aware of the misery I was going through. I don’t really know what happened… but something did. I wish I knew exactly what it was so it could become advice for others in the same situation I was in, but I was so preoccupied with life, school and friends that it wasn’t apparent to me what transition had occurred, or why. I began to regain my attraction to men that had been so blurry and weird whilst I was in the deep end with SOOCD. The groinals stopped, I started to see women as I had before, beautiful, but not erotic in anyway, the dreams stopped, the thoughts & doubts became few and far between, and when they WERE there, they were so mild that rumination was mostly non existent. I was myself again. And it felt great. I went from not even being able to HEAR the words bisexual, or lesbian, or LGBTQ, or denial without panicking, to it meaning virtually NOTHING to me. I know this post doesn’t give any explicit advice, but I hope it can act as some encouragement for people with SOOCD, or ANY theme for that matter who feel hopeless. I felt hopeless too. It things can’t change in ways you’d never expect them to. Don’t assume that you can predict everything in your life, because that’s far from the truth. Life is inherently unpredictable, for better and for worse, and embracing that unpredictability is the best thing you can do. Sending my love to you all!
DAILY REMINDER: You are stronger than you think. OCD does NOT define you and it is not a life sentence. There absolutely IS hope for you, no matter how lost you may be feeling right now. It is helpful to stop seeing OCD as this huge shape-shifting beast because it certainly can seem invincible when approached like this. Work on your recovery step by step and remember that every single success, no matter how insignificant it may appear at first, makes the beast shrink a little bit. I believe in you, I truly do 🌈 Good night/morning/whatever part of the day it is for you! 😊
With ocd should you trust your inner feelings and emotions because with me it feels like I have conflicting and contradicting and confused feelings and emotions. Because what I’ve realised is all I want to do is be happy and comfortable with myself and I’m getting confused along the way.
How do y'all get through the workday with constant intrusive thoughts? Just stay as busy as possible?
I'd been doing a bit better but then deep dived back into compulsion seeking - in my case, as a bisexual in a relationship with a man, it's proving my sexual attraction to men is real and comparing the levels of attraction I have to men vs women, plus reading of bisexuals' experiences online. Why do I do this? I know my attractions and tell myself sexuality is on a spectrum and can be fluid etc, and am in the happiest most loving and sexually fulfilled relationship, argh! My boyfriend also knows about my OCD and is supportive but also gets frustrated because of its illogical nature, ie he gets it's my illness but he's like, why do you need to check when you know. It's so hard knowing how to deal with it with him, and though he has done research and will do more I don't think any non sufferer can truly get it. Advice for partners of sufferers welcome!
I haven’t been on here in a while but I kinda just wanna share some stuff because I feel like it may help someone (maybe.. idk) So I’ve been trying to be kinda “strict” with myself on doing things that I know will help me in the long run, even though my ocd, anxiety, and depression want to just lay around hoping that by doing that I will emotionally recharge. So I’ve been doing yoga, study everything I can about ocd so that I really understand what I’m dealing with, I started focusing on my art again, hypnosis, and meditation. I also just wanna add that I am on a leave of absence from college so that’s how I have the time for all of this. Even with doing all that there’s moments when my ocd or depression still win and I end up searching everywhere for reassurance or doing nothing at all. I just want everyone here to know that it’s okay to trip up sometimes, even if it happens everyday eventually you can start to gain control again. I’ve also been watching videos on ocd, anxiety, and depression from a YouTube channel called anxiety & ocd discernment. The first few videos are free on the channel and after that there’s a $3 membership fee. I adapted this idea that “I have nothing to lose by trying everything to help myself, but I have a lot to lose by not trying at all”. I know not everyone would like this kind of thing but it has helped me start to move forward with getting better and I think it could be a really good resource for those who cannot get a therapy appointment or to use in between sessions so I figured I’d share it with everyone. I know how hard ocd is to face everyday but I hope everyone can be proud of any form of progress that they have made, even if it feels like you haven’t made any in a while. This is such a difficult journey that none of us asked to go on but we are so strong for pushing through it anyway. I’m so proud of all of you here, stay safe everyone and show yourself lots of love today!
For women with soocd who read coming out stories online and go on latebloomer forums and read masterdocs, etc. Firstly, nothing good or productive will come from that. No one else's story can determine yours, so there's literally no point looking at that stuff, but especially not if you have ocd, which is a real disorder that distorts the way you think and analyze your identity. Second, maybe this perspective will help you: people of all sexualities experience soocd obsessions accompanied with the fear of being in denial. Even women in same sex relationships who have soocd endlessly ruminate and doubt their attraction to women because of the way ocd works. They also wonder am I no longer attracted to the sex I always thought I was They? Or was I ever attracted to the sex I thought I was They? They also compare themselves to coming out stories to see if they relate or not and try to use that as evidence with their ocd. My point is, the next time you think that it will truly be helpful or a relief to read or visit a site or video, etc. To compare your sexuality with someone else's, at least pause for 5 minutes, and see if you can delay it. Oftentimes, when you delay a compulsion, the 5 minutes come around and you may have even forgotten about it. If not, delay it for 5 more minutes, etc. Watch a funny YouTube video for 5 minutes and you'll like forget about the urge. Gay people with soocd doubt their attraction to the same sex because of black and white info about sexuality that is spread online. Straight people with soocd do the same thing. Bi people with soocd and pan people with soocd and ace people with soocd also do the same thing. But regardless, none of us need to read other people's sexuality stories and compare to them, because it gets us nowhere except deeper into the blurry cycle of ocd where nothing makes sense. Trust me, I've been dealing with this obsession for multiple years now and have had lots of episodes where I dug myself so deep in these compulsions that I felt utterly hopeless and like life was pointless bc of the pain and torment I put myself in. When I started resisting the compulsions again, though, the heavy fog began to lift and your perspective changes a lot. Remember that: ocd doesn't change you, just like depression doesn't change you. It changes your perspective, but not you. It lies to you, but it isn't you. And it doesn't have power without you (your participation in it).
I've marked as trigger warning because when I was doing some research as to why I get panicky in front attractive women without the intrusive thoughts, it said a bunch of things can develop alongside OCD which I don't want to then trigger people. The thing I want to ask the professionals, or others who may know, is about a thing called Venustraphobia and its relation to SOOCD.
I’m done with ocd winning At this point as long as some percent of me wants my fiancé I cannot keep fighting with whether I am bi, gay or straight. It’s taken so much of my time, happiness, health. We just bought a house together and this should be the happiest moments of my life. F you OCD. At this point my brain tells me ITS PROBABLY NOT OCD. But I don’t care; I’m choosing to be with my fiancé: he makes me the happiest I have ever been. All this “proof” from my past can literally go to h*ll. Over it and it’s time to take my life back!!!!
My HOCD started making me to not only feel insecured about the sexual orientation possibilities but about EVERYTHING in my life. Like did I lock the door? and stuff. Can OCD turn from this type to another type of OCD like mine did? Is this normal for people who suffer from OCD?
Planning on taking prozac. To all prozac users, how has prozac helped you?
Does anyone deal with maladaptive day dreaming and have advice on how to stop?
Is it possible to do ERP yourself? I can't get a therapist since I don't live in the countries with NOCD therapy 😔
i had an awakening today- i was always in relationships that emotionally distant and cold so i always knew i was loving enough because in comparison to my partners, i was infatuated. now i have a girl who genuinely reciprocates the love and care so i feared that i wasn’t giving enough or if i was even deserving of that type of love. it was like WOW that makes sense-
I felt so much better a few weeks ago when I was diagnosed with ocd. Now I question if that’s real. Do I even have ocd? Ocd can’t be a the cause for all my problems? Sorry guys. I’m not looking for reassurance just expressing my thoughts right now. I just feel like giving up and letting whatever is going on to just take over my life because this is too hard.
Hi everyone, Just wanted to say that I recently went through a horrible and debilitating spell of OCD. I was completely convinced that the things I was obsessing about were real. However, after a combination of getting help with NOCD and going on the right medication, I can happily say I am almost completely free of obsessions, anxiety, rumination, and all of the other terrible things that come with OCD. IT GETS BETTER! YOU WILL GET BETTER! Your suffering IS temporary.
Happy first day of fall everyone! 🍂 One thing that I think helps with anxiety and depression is just an overall feeling of safety. But in all fairness, we don’t really get that feeling often… but the next best thing… Feeling cozy! 🤗 It might be weird, but starting today I’m doing my own little “cozy challenge”, testing all the things that make me feel cozy. Tonight I’m cuddled up in my comforter, fresh out of the dryer. My fairy lights are on. My hot chocolate is loaded with marshmallows. And I rented a throwback movie. I think it’ll be a good time 😎 So feel free to join my cozy challenge 🤣 and any suggestions are welcome!
Anyone had therapy with NOCD? What are your thoughts on this program? Thank you :)!
anyone else get more nervous when your head seems too quiet feels like you don’t care anymore and it feels more realistic
where have the huge anxiety attacks and uncontrollable thoughts gone??? why isn't it bad? is this not ocd? why do i still feel like i have some urges or like i like the thoughts PLUS no anxiety????? is this me coming out of denial???? and why am i ignoring these feelings? is it so i could remain in denial? especially that i don't feel attracted to guys anymore but it feels like i am to girls :(
I am so confused a member on here called Bingbong says he has no idea if I am gay or not but have OCD. Does this go for the same with POCD as people can’t answer if I am pedophile or not. I thought having PoCD and HOCd meant this was the opposite. So confused by what members say on here
Anyone else get a stressful feeling “in between” themes? Like either it can’t pick on what to ruminate or there is nothing it’s ruminating on at the moment but it’s waiting for you to make one wrong thought for it to latch on too. It’s like a parasite I swear…
Had an existential crisis today. I tried so hard not to freak out and throw myself in a tailspin of unwanted thoughts, but the thoughts sneakily came in and hit me like a tidal wave. I am due to graduate in December this semester and I had a scheduling mishap (we are about 5 weeks in) and I wasn't enrolled for the correct amount of credits, resulting in me actually not being considered a full-time student. (12 credits is considered full-time here) On a whim today I caught this in my Portal for school and thought to email the registrar's office just to clear things up. Good thing I did because I ended up needing a course that I had initially dropped at the beginning of the semester to make time for my internship and that course was one that was required for me to graduate as well. A whole entire mess- believe me, I was in GO mode. Talking with my professor, my advisors, the registrar's office, my mom and more. Within a matter of about 45 minutes, I got the issue fixed and I am in the right number of credits as of now and I was able to switch my courses to fit into my schedule. What if it doesn't work? What if he says no? What happens when there's literally no space for you in that class? What happens if you literally don't graduate in December? Will you have to stay an entire semester longer just to finish one course? How will you afford that extra semester if that does happen? What happens if it DOES work out, and you have allllllllll that work to make up? Will you be able to even catch up? What content have you missed thus far? How are you even going to jump into a class 5-weeks in? The thoughts literally never end. I tried to tell myself, "I'll figure it out, like I always do." This helps me sometimes but then I think, "Well... what if you don't figure it out?" And then the whole process starts over again. Gratitude is the only thing that I've figured out I can use to drown these thoughts out. Simply just trying to find the gratefulness in a situation can reframe my whole mindset. I am just SUPER grateful that ON A WHIM today, I decided to email the registrar's office about the discrepancies in my schedule. Because I truly believe that if I had waited until the end of this week, or even next week, I would not be able to get this figured out because it'd be too late.
Can anyone recommend a good book/movie/series that features a character with OCD? I am pretty tired of lazy representation with zero research put into it.
Before me and my wife got together 7 years ago I was hooking up with other women and I feel so guilty. My wife and I had already started flirting and we had cuddled while watching a movie at a friends house and I think I was still hooking up with someone else. After we had our first kiss I never hooked up with anyone again but I still feel so guilty. I feel like a horrible human being and a cheater.
I’m really anxious because I’ve decided to step out of my comfort zone and go to a concert with a girl that my brain tells me I fancy sometimes. Has anyone got any tips for calming down because I know I need to go but I really don’t want to. Even though, there’s no way of backing out now.
No matter what I do, or say, or try - My OCD IS TAKING MY LIFE FROM ME. Still chronic nightmares leaving me vacant most mornings. Will put on music, hop out of bed, down a red bill, turn on a comedy, call a friend, cry - nothing helps. I know my triggers. I know my OCD so well, I worked through my truant, in AA, in Outpatient - NOTHING IS WORKING.
Why does these thoughts feel so real, it feels like I really want what my thoughts are telling me 😞
i really don’t know what’s true anymore