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What does it mean if you experienced a groinal response before you even suffered from OCD?? I remember getting a random groinal response when I was 14 like why??

i feel so miserable with life now. it really feels like im a lesbian. what is the point now that i wouldnt be accepted and my life is basically destroyed.

I don’t know if it’s the relationship or the ocd. How can I tell? He’s hanging out with a girl a lot, I told him to tell me. Well he tells me but afterwards when I find out my self by watching the girls story. I’ve always said trust is important. My ocd is making me OBSESS. I don’t know what’s real or not. Please help! (I can’t go to therapy)

I know I’ve been posting too much, but I really need help or advice. My Harm OCD is becoming so real. It feels like I am about to hurt someone or that I want to hurt someone and it is depressing me so much. I feel the longer it goes on, it feels like the closer to the edge I get to acting on obsessions and it’s scaring me. I’m terrified. Anyone have any advice?

Has anyone with HOCD ever felt completely convinced they must be gay? And feel next to know anxiety about it and then have spikes of sudden anxiety because you almost realise again how uncomfortable that makes you?

Idk what to do about HOCD and POCD mixed in with real event OCD... 😭😭😭

I got engaged to my man this year, we’ve been together going on 5 years. He is amazing and we have this healthy, wonderful relationship. My OCD is sucking all my joy 😞 - I constantly have thoughts of “what if you’re wrong and he’s not the one? What if you guys get divorced someday? Is he the one? Does this anxiety mean he’s not?” Constant ocd and urges to seek reassurance and it’s miserable. I need hope that this will get better, I’m so afraid I’ll ruin what I have with my ocd.

I'm always anxious that something bad may happen. Even when everything is fine I think it won't last for a long time,I can't enjoy these moments when I'm happy because I think that after good period will be a horrible one. Does anyone feel the same?

Oh god! These feelings are so strong. Even when they settle they’re still there. It feels like I want it and I don’t even have the energy to say I don’t anymore. I don’t want them to be true but it seems as if they must be, it seems impossible for me to go back to being happy where I was.

i was actually feeling good tonight and then i realized i wasn’t anxious and that made me anxious. such a vicious cycle. does anyone else have this problem??

Why should we not ask what we can do and what not..? And not to ask if I'm okay or approve what I fear. How it triggers ocd? It does.. but what's the logic behind it

I had a TBI in 2010 at 13. Iv started eating eaver day at lunch to feel right despite the fact i lost my swallow and other functionsin my injury. This ritual almost always makes me feel good but almost always make me feel bad after. i’ve been struggling for years with this trying to figure out whether it’s OCD or PTSD or just coping. But now that I feel all these negative feelings I’m hedging my bets on OCD. i’ve had OCD therapy about different stuff but this can never be touched somehow. I know I should try to resist this compulsion but resisting it brings me extreme pain emotionally and it’s extremely draining, it even makes me want to hurt myself. i’m thinking I need to go back to my OCD therapist but it’s such a unique situation. And I’m uniquely extremely stuck. this is my only issue but it seems like the biggest one it hurts others around me. I dont want to be hear living like this. i’ve stopped doing what I love, i’ve become so small and secluded and intreverted. it also doesn’t help that my parents don’t understand. Instead of ther confusion I feel hatred in there exhaust to deal with me and it hurts!

does anyone think they did something bad and this time it’s not really OCD?

Has anyone done or been apart of an OCD/ROCD Zoom group session? Would love to get involved in one if possible.

What community can I join? I want to build healthy friendships and just have someone to talk to tbh.

How long should you do ERP? I have the best luck it seems with writing short stories about my husband and my worst fears (marrying him being a mistake, never knowing for sure if he’s “the one”, never feeling better and being miserable my entire life.” Sometimes I read it just a couple times and my anxiety is very high and after just a couple times through, I feel “normal.” Is this a sign to move on to something different or should I keep exposing myself to it? Also, I tend to get anxiety when I realize the story isn’t scaring me anymore. How can I do exposures to tackle that giant?

why do i feel like i want false attractions to apply to people like my mom, best friends, relatives, etc bc then id know it’s hocd 😭😭. i remember in the beginning of hocd, i felt attracted to every single girl i saw and even questioned whether i’d like my mom if she wasn’t related to me. now i’m like hoping to have a feeling towards my best friends who’ve i been friends with before hocd to prove i have it because i know i never felt that type of attraction towards them before. i’m sorry because this sounds so invalidating to people who dread their false attractions.. 😞 i’m sorry

is anyone else’s hocd stem from society and other’s judgment? this makes my hocd seems not as official.. in the beginning of my hocd and before i even knew what hocd was, i googled mother daughter quotes and cried so much because i thought i’d lose my mother. i cried so hard. i also get parts of my hocd where i’d be like “i have to be straight for my mother”. i’ve had crushes on boys before, was i just gay all along? 😞 am i just unable to accept myself because it feels like that’s what it is. i feel like there’s so much more proof but i’m so tired..

Hello everyone , I am almost three months postpartum and I believe I have Postpartum OCD and struggled with repetitive intrusive thoughts . I had it with my first baby and have been able to manage my symptoms ever since with psychotherapy. I was on medication for about 1.5 months and felt better until I found out I was pregnant once again and stopped medication. Id say I’ve worked hard on not letting my mind spiral out of control again without meds and do feel that reframing my thoughts have helped me this far. My goal is to completely heal and I feel that my current Therpist cannot get me to that point. I noticed that Sleep deprivation was more of the reason why my postpartum mood disorder came about. I looked for a therapist for a long time that specialized in postpartum mood disorders and gave in to the one I was referred to by postpartum international. I still feel that I need more answers and possibly other suggestions rather than reframing my thoughts, self care and asking for help when I’m overwhelmed with my 2 babies under the age of 2. I’m hoping that NOCD can help me fully heal one day therefore decided to give it a try. Thanks for listening everyone. Hope that I am able to relate to this community and have some support and to also provide support.

I think abt how beautiful and amazing our relationship was before these thoughts and images came along. It makes me feel empty and depressed and alone. When we see each other I hold him and cry every time because I feel like what I’m going through is gonna take him from me.

Do people with False Memory ever get to a point in treatment that they remember if the event actually happened or not?

TW--- I feel different from most hocd sufferers, like Im standing on one bridge and looking at everyone on another. Genuinely think Im gay and looking at the proof ocd or my brain gave it makes sense to me I thought It was just self esteem issues but It was me being gay all along. For some reason it became an obsession and I think I wouldve realized it even If I had never got ocd. I think ocd and me discovering this unfortunately paralleled with each other which would explain the anxiety all these months. I literally feel like my whole identity is shifting, I also have a good idea as to why It became an obsession of mine perhaps because I was never going to be able to accept it or admit I was in denial? This also explains what I thought was a painful self discovery was just me being stubborn and not accepting it due to internalized homophobia, heteronormativity and a little bit of not wanting to be judged by others. Now Im worried that Ill never be able to accept that Im gay and continue to suffer. And all this explains why Ive been badly depressed lately This is messed up, why wouldnt my brain just tell me Im gay when I was really young wtf.

I'm feeling so much grief and sadness. I miss not thinking a lot about anything. I miss being normal. I hate having OCD. I hate being like this. Living with OCD is so hard.. this is so hard...

I keep washing my hands again and again and again. I touch things and don't stop until it's perfect. I am confused about my sexuality. I rethink things that I have done and sometimes I have to force myself to stop thinking that something bad will happen to those I love. I tell myself to be positive but at the end of the day I'm still not able to fight it. I tell myself tomorrow I will be different. It will all stop. Next day there I am repeating things and the worst feeling is when it's pulling me towards it even though I'm trying hard to fight back. It's never enough until it's perfect.

I don’t understand. I was feeling so good yesterday. And now today I feel scared and anxious like I have to act on my thoughts or I want to act on my thoughts and I feel like I’m right back. Yesterday I was fine and today I am CONVINCED I will do something bad. How can this happen? It’s so upsetting.

How to deal with rocd in a new relationship? I keep feeling like I don't really like him and stuff. Every hobby he mentions that's a little nerdy or not really my thing I think that I must not like him at all and should just end it. It's making me so nervous and feel like I don't want to be with him and then instead of spending time with him, I'm obsessing over if I even like him and its making things unenjoyable for me. Any tips. Any advice. Please. This is my first relationship (at 20) so i haven't ever dealt with this before and I don't even know what is normal in a relationship since Ive never had one before. Please help.

Why is my thought not bothering me anymore? Is it because I believe it or what?

it really feels like i’m choosing to be straight for society and if this world was gay i wouk have no problem fitting in 😔

I'm reaching at to someone going through the same thought process as me ?. Thoughts like you want to be with the same sex.......I feel so messed up in the head 😔

From months of dreaded and sickening thoughts and feelings at the thought of dating/flirting with a woman- OCD has now flipped this all and makes me feel like I’m gonna enjoy being with one and that I should look forward to it 🙃

I'm straight, how do I get my attraction and libido back? Any tips ( I'm confident about my sexuality today cuz it seems that today is a good day and I know that I'll be confused again after 2 or 3 days)

Every time I get intrusive thoughts these days I just accept them as true without even thinking about it. What does that mean? My ocd is real? I just realized this a while ago but I didn’t even notice this whole week I had been doing that.

Why do we feel urges to act on a thought? Where exactly does it come from and how to make it less frequent?

You ever get a gronial response and keep relooking to make sure it’s not really there or it goes away? I seem to do that a lot. See a picture of a kid, feel butterflies in my stomach or the slightest sensation down below then keep checking myself while seeing what triggered me and pretty much every time there’s no movement downstairs or it’s close to undetectable but I still end up panicking. And I feel like if I don’t go back and make sure it goes away that somehow it confirms my fear that I’m a p***. I use to be pretty good at resisting the need to check but lately my anxiety has been getting the best of me.

How much is erp therapy and how often is it required?

Hi everyone. I need advice/help on how not to ruminate. That is so tough. I get caught ruminating, even when I think I am not. Then, I try to distract myself in order not to ruminate but that is considered compulsion. Help. Thank you.

Can ocd makes you doubt about your true self and values in life and whether you really want these awful things to happen?

Why is existential ocd so freaking difficult compared to other themes?

Help! I been feeling REALLY depressed (with a mix of anxiety) the past few days. REALLY strong emotions. Really sleepy. I’m on 25 mg of Zoloft. idk if these emotions are part of the healing of OCD. I got out of bed at 1 PM & haven’t been motivated to brush my teeth. I asked to go to 50 mg of Zoloft and I’m not sure if that’s a smart choice? I’m on week 4 of medicine.

So I just started a relationship and now my mind is telling me I don't like the person at all and it feels real and I can't tell. Is this ROCD??

Most mistake we make are because we didn’t know..but it doesn’t mean no harm was done so

tw i hear a lot of straight girls saying that a relationship with another girl makes them sick but i never felt disgusted or sick thinking about that. heck, one time before hocd i tried imagining myself as the guy in the relationship and i feel like i felt attraction but then shut it down by saying “i prefer to be the girl”. is this denial?? help

tell yourself, “maybe i did, maybe i didn’t.”

I am probably completely crazy. I don't trust my own memories. Like i ask myself: Did that really happen or i just imagined it? I don't want to be crazy. I feel very depressed for some days and i have no one to talk to, i don't want to talk to anyone because they'll think i'm crazy. I have no hope anymore.

can someone please help me. i’m literally missing school today, i don’t think i can make it to school without being so depressed that i can’t do work. i think all my crushes were comphet. how could this be tho? :( i feel like i imagined scenarios with my “crushes” differently from other girls. but i’d get very excited when i talk to my crushes. i’d get excited yet shy when they were around me, but i guess it was comphet because i didn’t have a lot of crushes, like barely. idk if it was shameful to have a crush at all (i was scared of telling people that i had a crush because in grade 3 i was terrified that they would tell him) or i just didn’t have crushes at all. and it also feels like if this world was gay, i would have no problem being gay. gosh

I suffer from false memory ocd, anyone else who suffers from this? How do you usually know when a memory is completely made up by your own mind?

Each day living is getting difficult even though I have everything to eat.. a house to live in.. books to read.. a family. Yet I have terrible relations and I fear everyone will leave me or a day will come that I will have to leave everyone. A 24 yr old girl who aspires to become a civil servant but today feeling like a failure and burden. Why? Why do I feel so anxious, angry on what people did to me or why my behaviour was not normal like other kids who now have graduated from top IITs, medical colleges or top NLUs and I'm in my bed hiding my face in fear that I'm someone who won't be able to survive. Please help me. Please. I want to build a strong career but I'm already 24 and have severe OCD. No one knows and feels it except for me. People in past have said that you only overthink but my impulsive behaviour.. repeating things again and again.. my obsessions and compulsions have distorted the way a normal individual could think. I dont have money to pay for ERP therepy but I need help. I'll pay off as soon as I get hired. It may take around 2-3 years. So I dont think I'm going to get any support anyhow. I know this platform is good that's why I came here. Please help

tw help me please there no way i’m not lesbian. i think all my past crushes were comphet. i don’t think i actually had crushes on boys. it was just comphet. no wonder this new “false attraction”’ feels so strong. can someone please talk to me.

For my final exposure my therapist is gonna make me go to a gay club with my two gay best friends 🙃 The thought of a masc lesbian hitting on me and me liking it and wanting to be with them scares me so fucking much omg I feel like I’m a lesbian and I don’t feel attracted to men at all I feel disgusted by them on every level but i dont with women what is this

just searched up comphet. why am i not as anxious?? it’s like i don’t care??

today i’ve been obsessive but not on a bad thing, on something i enjoy, but it’s come to a point i’ve been doing this all day, i’m anxious, i can’t finish eating wtf

I don’t understand the thought comes in and if the thought comes in I don’t understand do I genuinely like it cause if i do then my brain goes to ooo thats denial and i get panicky and then i question my panic as a just a way to escape the denial and most of the times I don’t find an answer and the uncertainty makes me go crazy i am losing hold of myself i want normal life and thinking back. Like i wouldn’t have a problem with it and of every single thing i have read online it says if don’t have a problem with it that means you’re in denial and that shit scares me and i question that too its this vicious rut that I can’t seem to get out of. And also earlier i used to find them disgusting and gross now if I don’t my brain doesn’t know how to act or what to believe. There are days that I don’t think about this and i am like calm but then also like you haven’t thought about what does that mean and now suddenly that you do what does that mean if you like these thoughts do you actually or is your brain making you think like that its so bad that I don’t know what to do anymore its like giving up. This living in uncertainty is like crazy bad. I write things here to feel there are others like me and that gives me a sense of relief even if it is for a second. Why is ocd so hard so consuming doing normal life with it is so difficult.

Nsfw I keep testing by watching men workout and stuff and touching myself. I keep getting off to it even though I dont want to and the things I want to be into dont seem to be doing the trick. It doesnt take long either, its quick and I feel like thats evidence. Idk what to do. Maybe Ive been mistaking anxiety towards women my whole life as attraction when really its just that.

You feel the most , when you stop telling yourself how you “should” feel

Does anyone’s ROCD m Make you avoid all attractive people ? Also fear of developing feelings for someone else other than ur significant other ? Really struggling with this because I want to be with my bf but any time I talk to someone else who I think is good looking (no flirting at all) I instantly feel uncomfortable, and my brain goes into a whirlwind of “u like them” “u want to be with them” “u don’t like ur bf anymore” “you have a crush on them” “ur relationship is over” even when you don’t even know them/know they wouldn’t be good for you

My real event ocd gets real bad whenever i think that I'm the only person who has done these things. I feel like nobody I know has done anything this disgusting. So i kinda feel like I don't deserve friends, love, content or happiness anymore...

not really sure of what i’m feeling but i’m going to try to just sit with it, no matter what

Has anyone overcome staring ocd? How to live with it??

I need assistance 😭 I love my boyfriend so much and he is so handsome and good looking but my stupid messed up brain is picking out the smallest imperfections on his face and my OCD is making me focus on those instead of on the big picture making him seem unnattractive to my brain 😭 Can anyone give tips on how to stop feeling unattracted to him?? Sometimes I'm so in love with him other times I just don't feel anything then the guilt rolls in 😭

Hello after a nice period without too much anxiety and diving in the hole of reanalysing my thoughts my HOCD is there again the last month. I just visited a new city and my anxiety was increased dramatically. I feel that I like every man that i see in the street. I am trying to tell myself that is result of my OCD but currently seems is not working. Also I started feeling really nervous and anxious when having sex with my girlfriend, cause I am worrying if I have an erectile. Does anyone fee the same?

My OCD symptoms are gone now, not due to therapy (although that did help) but because of reading a few philosophy books, specifically Nietzsche. Nietzsche, in The Gay Science, talked about making your own morality, as an individual, away from the condescending influence of societal morality, thinking beyond the black/white code that society inks upon. Giving yourself freedom to be who you are. It's like how my life changed with this book. I realized that all my life I've been trying to fit in, do and *think* things that are societally acceptable, which I assume was the root cause of my OCD, and now I don't give a shit at all. I've finally realized what "freedom" means.

I need help with this guys. With my first child, I had a narcissistic mother in law who was constantly judging my parenting and was always looking for a way to call me a bad mother (not to mention that I had POCD at the time). Now I am remarried and my daughter is 14. I have a new mother in law who is wonderful and doesn't constantly judge me. The problem is I always think I am a horrible mother bc of what happened in the past. She was a very abusive person. When she found out I had postpartum anxiety she would ask me constantly if I had thoughts of hurting the baby. And I knew what she meant. And she wasn't talking about just someone with anxiety. She heard a few things on the news about postpartum depression and assumed I was some homicidal psychopath. Now it's 14 years later and I still can't get her voice out of my head. I've forgiven her over and over again, but I feel so I insecure as a mother, like I'm not good enough. And I knew it all goes back to that time. I know many would question why I'm still not over it. I don't know. I think its ocd with the memories. I feel like nothing I do can make me a good mother 😭

I’m watching a movie where a guy and girl are kissing and when I’m trying to look at the girl I keep noticing the guy in the background or i just notice him in general... 😭😭😭 and it’s making me feel anxious and my HOCD is making me think that I don’t want women 😭😭😭

Does anyone with false memory theme ignore the thoughts , then your scrolling on social media or doing something totally not to do with your thoughts. And you see something that makes you have the thought like oh my God I did do that horrible thing because I saw something I think I remember or the thought or what you see feels "familiar"?? Please help me I was doing so good now I seen something I'm like omg I think I remember that so I did do that horrible thing .... :(

My partner and I recently had our 3 year anniversary, and it’s been incredible. I love him so much and celebrating our relationship is important to me, but recently I think my relationship OCD has been triggered. I keep wondering if I’m doing the right thing. Should I still be with him? Is 3 years too long? What if it doesn’t work out? Will I wish I ended it now? But at the same time I love him and want to build a future with him. I feel like my options are to get married within a year or break up within a year, but neither feel right. I want to be content with where we are now, but the uncertainty of it all is driving me crazy. I’m also worried that since we’ve been dating so long that I’ve become dependent on him/lost myself. I don’t think this is true, in the past we both worked on avoiding codependency actively. But now I’m feeling myself slip and I’m afraid I’m not capable of doing this without him. I’m by myself for the first time in a while tonight and I’m noticing how unraveled I am, I’m just afraid this means I need to end things? I know this is a jumble of thoughts and worries and I don’t know what I expect to gain, I just need to get it out there somewhere

How would you describe ocd to someone? I’m just curious as I am sitting here trying to calm down after spiraling. I think (since Real event is my main theme and I would say my other themes are branches of it) I would describe it as doing something wrong, that you don’t agree with, that you know is against your personality, against yourself, and having that event or those words playing on replay everyday of your life

It has been a GOOD week for OCD in my household. I was able to cut showering back to once a day and hand washing down to only after I use the bathroom. I still have a long ways to go but I have had so much less to do these past few days. My intrusive thoughts are still there but I am finding myself being much better about ignoring them! If you’re at the end of your rope with OCD just know I was there just a few weeks ago and it WILL get easier.

Also, does anyone feel like they almost have like two brains? not personalities just feeling okay and not okay? hard to explain

How many of you have recovered from ocd? I know we tend to come here for support during our struggles but I know many ppl have recovered from a theme or ocd symptoms period. Can you share your story if you have. The prevailing story is that ocd is chronic but there are many voices off this app saying they are living proof that ocd doesn't have to be chronic.

I think I completely misunderstood my ocd, looking back during my time with ocd it dosent feel like I even had it. And rewinind even further to my life before ocd i think i was always gay and never became aware of it. Im so sad and unhappy

tw relationship ocd i’m not in a relationship but honestly the guy i like i’ve liked for a very very long time. maybe i sound dramatic but i do feel really attached to him and i feel empty when i’m not with him. but now i’m worried that i only like him for attention and that i’m a narcissist gaining supply out of him. i enjoy dressing up and feeling pretty if i know i’m gonna see him, and i plan things to say and stuff. it’s exciting to me. but my fear is that it’s ALL based on that, and not about him. which makes me sad to be honest, and hopeless.

Does anyone else try to find problems out of for example your partner? And then you have a bad day and kind of try to blame your partner even tho he didn't do anything?

Does anyone’s Harm OCD make you feel like you have to do the horrible thought or that it is somehow your destiny? Mine has morphed into this from worrying I would hurt someone to wanting to and now to having to. And it scares me and is demoralizing. It just gets worse and worse.

I have always felt terrible about myself, the crazy thoughts in my head, this guilt that I was a bad person for whatever reason. I aged and it faded but it was always there in some form, no matter what I did I was doing it with bad intentions. I always felt less than others at everything. I guess it’s the life I was destined to live.

i used to be a really hateful person, an internet troll, a big hypocrite, and a bully. i attacked and labeled people for their mistakes but now im scared it will happen to me. what can i do to make it right, and if it gets spread all over the internet how to apologize to everyone? im really sorry if you ever interacted with me on my account. i am experiencing overwhelming guilt i wish i didn't make those accounts to hurt people behind a screen. this was only a little over a month ago too, so it hasn't been long since I hurt people. im scared that I triggered someone's pocd, or made someone feel so badly they think of dark thoughts, im scared that I'll be forever tied to what I did I don't know what to do

Why is no one commenting on my posts 😭😭 I’m freaking out

Does anyone else experience major anxiety and depression over past mistakes? At this rate I’m not sure if it’s ocd making me obsess over making it seem worse than it is but I genuinely feel like no one would ever love me if the knew what ive done. Ive messed my life up to the point of no return, it makes me feel like giving up.

Just looking for a listening ear since I can’t find a therapist: I’ve been depressed since I discharged from a general hospital. I was sent there by my ED (eating disorder) specialist and spent a week there. I wasn’t in crisis and I had no medical problems. The reason I was sent was to get an established meal plan and to start the weight restoration process (after I spent 7 weeks at ED residential treatment and failed). Anyways, here’s why I’m depressed: Whenever I discharge from somewhere, a solid discharge plan is never established. My team at the hospital said “Goodbye and good luck!” and gave my mom and I a list of therapists to call. I’m really angry and depressed because I’m in the exact same position I was before I went there (except now I have a meal plan and my weight is higher). I have no general therapist (I’ve given up looking for a specialist). The hospital couldn’t find one and I can’t either. I’m tired of this. And I’m not in a great recovery mindset. I’m having so many thoughts to relapse and it’s scaring me. For context, I’m 16 and I’ve been in and out of hospitals for my ED and OCD since I’ve been 11.

Please help! I’ve got so used to my HOCD thoughts that now when I have ‘straight’ thoughts they make me so anxious. This morning I felt myself really attracted to women (like I used to be) and it made me so panicky. Now I sometimes catch myself calling myself “gay” and it doesn’t feel me with anxiety which then in itself makes me anxious. And now when I am attracted to a women I feel anxious. It’s like the HOCD has reversed itself. It’s as if. At first the gay thoughts made me anxious and uncomfortable, then they just made me uncomfortable. Now the straight thoughts make me anxious but not necessarily uncomfortable?

I went to see the people who havent spoken to me because of covid yesterday to get reassurance it wasnt because of my OCD. I feel terrible today.......the lady I spoke to was nice enough to me but I seriously think she is suffering from dementia. She helped me get over my OCD last time but when I asked her if it was because of my OCD they have fallen out with me she said...'OCD???? No.....' I must have asked her about 4 times and at one point she said she must have OCD........She was a bit confused and now I have terrible anxiety. She said her husband didnt want to see me. I asked her why they were like this and she said oh the stuff that has been going on with the injections and stuff......They are in their mid 70s. I have such anxiety today. How can I do an ERP to stop myself from going over the conversation I had with her yesterday? I felt okay afterwards yesterday but today I have been sick with the anxiety. Please help me because I am so upset. I wish I had never gone round there. And I know seeking reassurance makes it worse. I am my own worse enemy. I cant stand this anymore. Why wont my brain just leave me alone? They were so kind to me when I had OCD 2 yesrs ago and even read up on it so why does it torture me like this now? I hate people falling out with me and fear I will never get over this one. I dont want to live anymore with OCD.

I feel like my ocd is throwing all it can at me! I’ve finally found my attraction to women again. But it’s sort of making me anxious that I feel somewhat normal. Now it’s like my OCD is saying “you don’t want this now do you?” It just feels like either way Im only content with the opposite of how Im feeling? Now if I have a fantasy or something Like that I end up telling myself that it was intrusive when I was the one who brought it up not my ocd? Is this level of being uncomfortable normal with recovery? Because right now these old feelings coming back feel so alien, I had got so used to always fighting my thoughts that it feels like I can’t stop fighting the thoughts that I want to have either.

TW POCD Please help. If you drink alcohol and you have intrusive thoughts during the m word (me time) does that mean they are true? The whole time I was trying to ignore them and trying to make them go away which unfortunately didn’t work it just made it worse but it doesn’t make it true when you have alcohol right? They are still unwanted intrusive thoughts? Because I really hope they are not true. I was sort of drunk but not to a point where I wasn’t aware of what I was doing so I was still able to try to tell myself that it’s just lies and to ignore them. I’m scared to death. I don’t want to be a monster 💔

I’m going to start new meds in a few weeks and I’m hella nervous. Although the new meds are proven to work better with managing OCD, they will be much stronger than what I’m currently on. This new medicine is called Prozac. Has anyone been on it? What was/is it like. Any advice?

Brothers and sisters, dare to see your intrusive thoughts as not absolute truths but as the lies that they are. See them and compare them to your values, they will not match, therefore move along, thoughts aren't by nature truth, they're simply thoughts. God bless you

Does anyone else also have autophobia/monophobia? If so, how are you coping?

I did something foolish. I read about impulse control disorder and now I’m literally freaking out that my harm ocd and the horrible feelings are really impulse control. Ugh. I should never have read about it.

i’m sorry for posting so much but i’m so scared rn because i feel like my hocd symptoms didn’t match everyone else’s when they started. people said they felt disgusted, i never felt that, i was just extremely scare. people said they had a deep down feeling about knowing they’re straight, again, barely had that. when does this doubt end?? 😔

Hocd TW... This is so messed up, I used to be in a hocd support group with this guy who I became good friends with, He eventually left that group, I still spoke with him but cold turkey ignored him for 2 months bc I used to get triggered everytime I was chatting with him, we started talking again and now he says he is bisexual, Ive told him several times that he probably confused himself by ruminating too much but he says he feels real attraction to men now and its stronger than women. Its such a discouragement talking to him now bc he used to a very positive guy, he still is but says he is bisexual now. Smfh. If it happened to him, it will happen to me too.

i feel like my past life was very different from kids my age. though i had crushes on boys in the past, i never really had a celeb crush or fictional crush. but i was also never obsessed with celebs or anything of that sort. i tried being obsessed with camila cabello and mariah carey; trying to force myself to see them as idols, but it’s just never worked. i also forced attractions to a member of bts (which i think is also driving my hocd crazy) but in real life i was able to have crushes on boys (which i doubt now) but i wasn’t able to hav crushes on older men because i thought it was weird. i’m not sure it’s because my dad was very absent as a father and him and my mother never showed affection towards each other or what not and i even get the “ick” with my male relatives like my father and uncle. i’ve also never been able to have an imaginary friend or an emotional connection to a stuffed animal. i forced myself to feel a connection to my toys, nothing. like though i liked certain toys more than others (lps for example, i loved those) i wasn’t able love them like actual children. overthinking to the max.

Why does OCD worsen with time?

I feel numb and heartbroken. Not sure who to talk to. I need more therapy sessions as well

What is our generation’s OBSESSION with sexuality??? I understand and absolutely LOVE the progression, but at this point it’s becoming toxic……and especially hard for people who are OCD. All I see on social media is posts regarding gender or orientation. Which is cool and all, but some of the wording on these posts persuade/ force people in a box of conformity.

How do I get clarity of my thoughts ? Wouldn’t it be common sense to know if you did something ? I don’t recall actually doing things my thoughts have me so messed up I don’t know what to believe is real or not. I keep trying to replay the real event and my thoughts of me doing it in my head to try and understand and get a better picture . I’m still paranoid. This is too much for me . I’d be happy living my life freely if this never happened. How do I live like this

TW: SOOCD I don’t know if this is me secretly somehow looking for reassurance but I just want to vent because I saw someone post about how they had and have SOOCD and ended up being gay anyway. It filled me with so much fear and I can’t help but think is that what’s going to happen to me? Was my initial thought 7 years ago real and denial convinced me I might have SOOCD as that would feel like a better outcome than actually being gay? I know that sounds so horrible because I have nothing against the LGBTQ+ community at all, I just don’t want to have to leave my current relationship, I feel so scared and alone.

gosh someone please just talk to me. the attractions feel so intense and real to me and it’s as if i’ve never felt attraction like this before because i suppressed it or something. i think i’m actually gay. this isn’t fair. i was on this guy’s tiktok earlier i found him physically cute but i had trouble having any sort of attraction towards him. but you know what? right when i start thinking about being gay and liking girls, the sensations and emotions come in and they’re so intense and they feel real. i feel like if i just gave in and let myself be gay i would be so happy. this isn’t fair, i was attracted to boys before even though it was rare, it was still there. gosh when i developed hocd i shouldve just dealt with it like a real gay person.. i hate my life..

There are so much more things about you than your intrusive thoughts. You have ocd but you aren't ocd. I am Cesar, I am a musician, I am a beloved child of God. I am mexican, I am very funny. I am glad to be alive. I am excited for the good days that are coming. I am excited for the holidays. I am a heavy metal fan. I am anxious at times. I am happy and patient when it rains. I am deciding to not believe the lies that ocd says. I am living my life today. Who are you?

Success story! After spending too much time ruminating the last two days, being tired of beating myself up and trapping myself, I decided that I’m done today. So the thought popped into my head many times. And it was scary. And I don’t know all the answers. But I don’t give a shit anymore. I don’t care if someone thinks I’m right or wrong or I deserve good things or I don’t. I want to be happy and love myself, so I’m going to be happy and love myself. Do I still have some anxiety, yes. Did I ruminate or ask for reassurance today, no. It feels a little easier now than it did earlier in the day after resisting all day long. I still have uncomfortable feelings but feelings are just feelings so I don’t care. My baby could be born any day now, the doctor said possibly as soon as tomorrow! He needs a mama who is going to show him what it’s like to handle uncertainty and love yourself no matter. 💪🏻

I’m afraid about starting ERP. Having anxiety is very distressing to me (I can’t imagine anyone enjoys it) and the idea of saying my anxious thoughts out loud makes me afraid that they will happen. It’s hard for me to voice my fears out loud because then they feel so real, like I can’t hide from them. Has anyone felt like this before ERP?

I truly cannot take this anymore. I feel as though I committed a crime and ruined my life. I haven’t been able to talk to my family because I have this immense fear that I’m going to be arrested at any moment and they don’t deserve to go through that. I really am so tired of all of this.

When did everyone start feeling better after erp / counseling?? I’m beginning erp next week—I was learning cbt and act for the past three months to learn how to cope with the thoughts, urges and feelings Now I’m onto the main treatment My whole thing is not knowing if I am a lesbian or not, that’s what gives me so much anxiety. But not wanting to be a lesbian, but also feeling like i dont wanna be straight. Just ya know classic ocd I don’t know how much longer I can survive with this