I saw an Instagram live of people talking about ocd/anxiety and one person said that sometimes we need antipsychotic medication and that really scared me so yesterday when I was having racing/intrusive thoughts I got super scared thinking “what if I can’t calm this down on my own and my Brain has snapped and I need to go to the hospital for antipsychotics” , I did sit with it and breathe it calmed down eventually but it’s still bothering me . I just imagine myself needing to be injected with an antipsychotic or tranquilizer to calm my brain down
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giving myself permission to do what makes me happy 🤍🤍🤍
What kind of thongs do you do to take your mind off of OCD? Not avoidence, just things that stop you ruminating? I find myself ruminating too much in a evening from 7pm onwards, any ideas on what I could do to take my mind elsewhere?
I suffer from many forms of OCD, but P and Z are by far the worst. What makes me wonder though, is my high libido. It might have to do with my biological clock ticking, or with me focusing on feelings in my groinal area to check, if I get aroused by children and/or animals, and/or me getting aroused through tensing my muscles there, whenever I have a P/Z OCD thought, or urge. I don't know and I try to not think about it too much, in order to not feet the OCD monster. What strikes me as odd, is that the slightest thought about sex seems to turn me on, like not false OCD arousal, but real, not that I'm in to children, or animals, or elderly, or family members, but as I said anything slightly sexual seems to turn me on. When I hear moans of pain, that's bad, too. There is nothing sexy about it. This "everything turns me on" feeling had never been there before P/Z OCD started and it didn't start right away, but developed later, I think after I got the pacemaker for deep brain stimulation for people with treatment resistant OCD. The pacemaker made me more aggressive, causes me to talk much more (too much for most) and might be also responsible for the higher libido. Can anyone with POCD and/or ZOCD related to what I am experiencing? Does anyone on here also has a pacemaker for DBS?
I cant identify what am I feeling rn. Idk if I'm happy or sad or bored or anything. I've been feeling like this for more than a month now. Feels like I'm not living my life, I'm just surviving. I'm not being productive. When someone shouts at me,i only feel bad for 10 minutes then I'm again in the no feeling phase. Nothing gets me excited. Idk if its depression cuz I'm not sad. I have ocd but anxiety has gone completely. Can someone help. I'm 16
Everytime you put yourself through the rituals, mental or physical ones, you have more and more uncertainty. It feels real, it looks real, but is not, that's the only magic OCD is capable of doing, looking bigger than it is. I'm proud of you, even tho you don't feel brave, you are, just for waking up and starting a new day. Never forget this
As someone who once couldn’t sleep because of their POCD hanging over them. It started over a year ago now. Yet lately I’ve noticed I actually have gotten better, whether slightly or significantly doesn’t matter. What matters is that I FEEL better. Some things I’d recommend people who are struggling is this: You have to focus on living day by day, and not focus on the missteps but rather the times AFTER the full step forward. You don’t lose progress in this sort of thing, though it can feel like that sometimes. Even now I’m feeling better than ever and yet the intrusive thoughts still persist, they just don’t last as long because I don’t give them importance. I’m also not terrified of sleeping anymore, though I admit my sleep schedule has been absolutely destroyed. Again, I’m making baby steps and as a community and app that I relied on for comfort and guidance for months, I just wanted to say that here. I also don’t have any therapy or medication, so for those who are struggling to get either, don’t worry it’s not the end of the line for you!
Really need to get over my fear of watching movies/ tv shows which include violence or scary music. I can’t even enjoy a normal documentary without being freaked out. Idk if this ties in with my harm OCD. I was literally just present when my ma was watching the marilyn monroe documentary and i was shitting bricks
So lately my OCD flared up because of stress and anxiety triggered by an unrelated event. My thing with hit and run OCD / false memory OCD is specifically about backing out of a parking spot and hitting someone because I remember when I was little seeing news about cars backing out and hit children because driver didn’t see the kid. So now it’s a thing for me. Really stupid. Last weekend, I parked in a garage and by an elevator. It was underground and quite empty, I think only 5,6 cars parked near me. I have the backup camera so I know there wasn’t any people behind my car but still circled around 3 times, and kept looking at my rear view mirror when driving away. And now I’m thinking all the what if’s and checking local police news if they’re searching for hit and run persons, etc. The more I read the news, the scarier it is for me cuz they just add to my anxiety of all the “what ifs” I already have and thinking the police is going to show up and pick me up. I have a therapist but she’s not an OCD specialist but I’m reading some books and doing researches on ERP. If it gets worse, I’ll have to find a specialist because this is a lot. This isn’t my only ocd, but they all center around false memory “What if I did this horrible thing or that awful thing”. Any support is appreciated!
What exactly does self-reassurance look like and is it something to avoid? When I feel anxious about my relationship with my partner, I often think to myself "I love him" even when I'm scared i don't, just to remind myself of the truth. Is this self-reassurance? I tend to feel better afterwards, but should I try NOT to think that?
can attachment be sexual or romantic, becuase i have some attachment to some female figures in my life, with no reason to so idk why i do, which yes i may find pretty but like i don’t want to be with them sexually or romantically, jusy like someone to talk to or hug when your upset( or validation). and it’s making me think i might be lesbian coz i don’t get these feelings towards boys
I’m starting to wonder if my attraction to my boyfriend has always been quite low but I never wanted to accept it because he’s the type of person I’d like to marry. Almost like I felt as though I SHOULD like him because he was so nice. Maybe that’s why I experienced anxiety. Maybe I do need to break up with him and I’m simply being selfish.
i have a crush on this guy and we’re getting closer and it’s amazing. it makes me super happy and i’m very attracted to him physically. i think he’s amazing! but when i think about us having sex, i don’t enjoy it. i find it perverted and weird. something happened to me once that i don’t really want to get into but essentially it’s probably a safety thing that’s turning me off. like sex has become this source of fear now and i find it gross… yet i’m also one to think A LOT about sexual stuff. i fantasise all the time about it. so it’s really confusing! i spoke to my therapist about it and it made a lot of sense that this is rooted in fear over what happened to me and all of that. but when i think of me having sex with a girl, i don’t feel as put off. logically i think it’s because i feel safe with women so it’s less scary. the thing that happened to me was done by a man and not a woman. but then part of me is nervous i’m simply not sexually attracted to men and i’m in denial. i’ve never had a romantic crush on a woman, and any sexual attraction i’ve felt has been purely anatomical (like very sexualised women in porn etc). i think i just feel a bit deflated because i honestly really really like this guy and now i’m questioning it all. i want to feel sexually attracted to him, and if i’m not, i don’t want the reason to be because i’m not sexually attracted to men! any insight would be appreciated :)
Feelings are tricky and this won't take long, but think about this one, the confusing anxiety you feel during good moments or thing you should enjoy might just be excitement and not fear. This happens to me a lot, I feel guilty for feeling anxiety during good moments but I've been mistakenly calling it anxiety instead of excitement! Thank God for good feelings!
I was on YouTube and accidentally pushed the create button and I got paranoid I recorded myself doing something bad and posted it I know I didn’t but I can’t stop searching YouTube to make double , triple , sure . I keep checking every five minutes it’s driving me crazy . I don’t have anything bad saved in my camera roll so I don’t know why I’m so paranoid Does anyone know if YouTube Saves your content automatically when you post from create option ?
I found an accurate song about OCD written by someone with OCD! Finally! It's called "Serotonin" by Girl in Red and it talks about intrusive thoughts, I probably could find more songs about OCD if I look, but it's nice to just run into one since OCD is, in my experience, rarely mentioned in the media.
I keep overthinking about if I may have hurt someone or made them uncomfortable. And I’m worrying about if whether or not this is an intrusive thought or it actually happened. The fact I deal with false memory OCD/POCD is so hard because I don’t know if it happened or not. I was hanging out with a guy and we never hooked up but did kiss and I’m over thinking about if I did something and made him uncomfortable. I’ve been overthinking about it with two different guys. We still have each other on social media and did not end anything on bad terms but I’m convincing myself I may have done something and cannot remember. This happened all the way back in 2019 (hanging out with the first guy) and 2021 (hanging out with the second guy). It is making me feel like if I did I don’t deserve to be happy, or to enjoy myself and everyone will hate me. It’s crazy to think about how I may be over thinking about something that never even happened but I’m convincing myself it did. Can anyone relate?
Literally hate the stereotypes that people with OCD are controlling, rigid, overly perfectionistic, and unempathetic that I see in media..... It makes me so anxious. Is there anything you guys do to handle the intense distress that seeing this causes you if it does?
I recently had a traumatic experience and I have found that my OCD symptoms have skyrocketed. My main theme is health anxiety but even compulsions from my childhood, like checking things around the house have come roaring back. I feel like I’m struggling to separate the trauma anxiety and the ocd anxiety and I don’t even know where to start with erp.
Just wondered what you guys do for self care. I think usually people with ocd deal with self doubt and hatred. We’re usually really kind people who forget to take care of ourselves. I’ve def noticed that I try and ignore my own wants because It makes me feel selfish. However, it’s a really important thing to do and you can’t give from an empty cup!
One thing that's really helped me is telling myself "its not happening because of you. It's happening to you." When you have ocd the intrusive thoughts and the things you obsess over are incredibly stressful and dark. It's hurting you. No one deserves this. No one. I imagine my lizard brain as a monster I have to deal with, rather than a part of who I am. It's like an abuser, and no one deserves the traumatic, gruesome, upsetting thoughts that come with ocd. If you had ocd as a young child like me (symptoms as a toddler, diagnosis at 7/8 yrs old), tell yourself "no child deserved to have those thoughts. Those were scary thoughts." In the past, evaluating my childhood was a compulsion. It still is a compulsion of mine, BUT I've been trying to see the hurt child in the picture (me). As a compulsion I told myself "what child would think of these things. What's wrong with me?" Now I say "No child should have to think these things. It hurt me and scared me." And through that, I've slowly gained more empathy for myself. I've begun to understand I am BEING hurt. No one is born naturally built to deal with the intensity of ocd. You deserve treatment. You need treatment. It's happening to you. It's being done TO YOU. Not because of you. Have empathy for yourself, understand you're being hurt by these thoughts. You are the victim/survivor of it. Whichever terms you prefer. Hug yourself, comfort yourself, understand that your thoughts scare you and hurt you, and it's not your fault
i’ve thought many times that my OCD went away or something similar, but then it all comes back. sometimes i have hours, days, weeks even, that i don’t feel the need to do compulsions or have intrusive thoughts as often. is this normal? do i really do have OCD? it’s like it all comes and goes and i never know when it’ll come or how intense it’ll be.
Does/has anyone else felt guilt for something in the past that they can't really fix now? It's so bad it rules my thoughts and I obsess and constantly ask reassurance from everyone. I was diagnosed with OCD at 15 and this is a new OCD thing for me to deal with. I just feel alone because I am STRUGGLING so hard. Thanks <3
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So, i had a fight over nothing with my mother and now my anxiety got triggered which in turn made my ocd worse. During Summer we are going to go to a wedding and i wanted to get a specific dress to wear but my mom disagreed with my choice and kept on trying to make me buy something else. I told her I don't agree but she kept on saying i know nothing about fashion and that i should listen to her. I didn't and she started getting aggressive which in turn made me angry and i told her that she shouldn't try to force her opinion on others. She kept on yelling that she won't stand others making fun of her daughter (all because of the dress i chose🙂) and i told her i don't care about the opinion of others over what i wear and she replied "okay but don't be next to me when we go".Then she started saying that i'm always the only one that "cancels" her as a person (in her book if you express any different opinion over hers it means you're against her for some reason) and that i should never ever ask her for anything again and that i should stay with my "ignorance". And then she kept on gaslighting and reversing my words. Apparently I'm not allowed to even choose what i want to wear.
What is one thing you are thankful for about yourself and why?
My whole life I’ve wondered what on earth is wrong with me? I’ve didn’t have a traumatic childhood or anything notable that would have messed me up. So I’ve always been confused why life is so hard and why it’s so bad in my head all the time. I thought I didn’t have an excuse to be in turmoil. Turns out I had OCD basically my whole life. Flash forward to me finding out at 22 and then learning that the World Health Organization has it listed in the top 10 most debilitating disorders. Go figure. I must say, it does give me slight relief just to know that little piece of news and the fact that it’s OCD and not me.
It feels like it’s literally impossible to feel normal or good at all. I just want to know that I won’t do anything to harm anyone or myself and feel inner peace with that. But I keep getting this feeling that I don’t want to be here and it’s so annoying. Like I keep trying to visualize my life how I want it but I just get the feeling that I really don’t want that and that I won’t make thru ocd or want to. Like what the fuck are even these feelings? Can anyone relate ?
I was on tiktok, and there was this guy in it, he was like 16 or something and idk if it was my intrusive thoughts that called him hot or if it was just in my head and i said it in my head, and I was trying too look at the comments too see if anyone else had said anything but i’m genuinely so worried right now..
I have MAJOR problem going to sleep because of ruminating and fear. My OCD's gotten worse lately and I've been living in constant fear for maybe four days now. I constantly feel like I'm on the verge of panic attack. How to calm down at least for a night time 😢
I stoped most of my compulsions. The anxiety has reduced but I don’t like that I’m not trying to figure it. It makes me feel like I’m doing something that is risky. I feel like I’m playing with my fate.
ever since i had that panic attack last week that’s all i’ve been trying to avoid. i’ve just been in bed doing absolutely nothing since then. i don’t want to just sleep all day out of fear.. idk what to do
I can’t stop obsessing over whether or not I’m a narcissist or some sort of sociopath who manipulates everyone around me and I feel like I’m losing my mind. My friend and I had an argument about how she thought I was ignoring her at a time when I felt super anxious. I apologized that my actions hurt her and acknowledged how it made her feel multiple times, but I can’t stop obsessing that I’m a narcissist because I also added in the fact of how that event made me feel, where I was struggling deeply with ocd and anxiety that no one could see and I felt alone. I come from an abusive past with narcissistic parents who frequently manipulated me and gaslit me and because of that my ocd has latched onto a new obsession where I compulsively replay conversations and check to see if I’m an inherently terrible person for making things about me. I’m so terrified of becoming like my dad, I’m terrified that I am a monster when I make the smallest mistakes, and I don’t know how to face this obsession :/ I know I can’t ask for reassurance here but I just feel like I’ve gone crazy and like I can never distinguish the line between standing up for myself and being a good person because I’m always afraid that deep down, my childhood turned me into a manipulative evil person
I've had a bad ending w my ex, it is a long story and i've been together with my best friend for almost 4 years now but i kind of hold a grudge against my ex for what she's done for example isolating me from my friends and keeping me at home causing me to dropout in HS in my 2nd year, i've talked to her as friends before but it would turn out kind of passive aggressive and i was like why don't you just say sorry and be friends so you don't have the weight of this stupid grudge anymore, because she's the type to talk back on alot of people as well, i'm not perfect either i've had anger issues and whatever but what if i like her still what if i'm lying to my gf One thought of like seeinf her in person and being embarrassed that my ex is there makes me feel like what if i like her again and i know i don't, but i have a problem woth trying to impress people and grt validation from them and seem to don't know the difference with a good friend rs and a romantic one in some way i'm just used to being romantic so i'm just scared of connecting to people aaah
So lately at work I’ve been putting more hours so I could get more overtime because it’s only offered so much and I volunteered to do 11-12 hour shifts a couple days and worked 9 days straight and I gotta say I’m excited to get paid so I can get caught up but I’m so freaking tired and I feel like my ocd is worse because of but I’m also trying to work more and keep busy to cope and people I work with keep telling me to take time off and slow down and I just don’t want to because if I focus on work I don’t feel so much pain but then I’m in overdrive to where I can’t even sleep. I slept all day yesterday to catch up on sleep and it’s currently 5:04am and I have to be up in an hour to be at work at 7 on my day off….jeeze what is my life 😴
From the past 12months, I have been doing nothing. My productivity is zero. This is because of all my mental problems. I have ocd, anxiety, depression,suicidal thoughts, ed, broke up with my first love, death of my grandfather, financial issues, study pressure and many more. I have my exam in 6months and I have studied nothing. My parents are working so hard to pay for my fees and I'm just laying on bed doing nothing. I feel guilty, I really wanna study but i cant give my 100 percent. I'm just 16, I didnt want all this. Life before was so happy. All the time I just think about dying. I really wanna talk to someone
Does anyone have this same issue when doing exposure? I have moments where I’m okay and in control of my situation, but the minute something stressful occurs, my brain instantaneously goes “see, this is why you should have done the compulsion, now what are you going to do?” and then the intrusive thoughts and urge to do compulsions get amplified. I’m also struggling with what is a compulsion, sometimes I’m like maybe writing this is reassurance seeking and I shouldn’t do it.
Hey ...my old energy!...i miss you a lot💔....Are you listening to my old excitement ... I miss you....and my old dreams..do you know ?..how much i miss you?... my old friend....i am not ignore you ...But ocd doesn't give me time to talk to you ... you are no longer my friend like before, there is nothing wrong with you ... it's all my fault ... I really miss our old bond ....I'm sorry mom and dad ... I couldn't fulfill your dreams ... I couldn't be what I wanted to be and almost never will be ...💔...i miss you dear life💔
I just put the cups away in the wrong order and then i did the same with the bowls and i tried counting but my brother asked if i was okay and i started crying because i was frustrated and my mom yelled and now i’m just sitting here crying wishing i put the bowls away right lol
Having a difficult time today, it's like when I improve a bit OCD ups the ante. My brain won't be quiet and it sucks :( When I hold my baby, I get intrusive thoughts and urges and every little muscle twitch I make feels like I did something wrong. I hate it so much, I try to do my ERP but sometimes the thoughts are so fast and powerful that it's hard :/ and sometimes I feel like I'm doing things wrong. Idk. I've been rationalizing and stuff a lot. It's like the more I do, the more I think "at least I don't want to do that!", then I feel like I want to...it twists every little thing to feel like this is who I am :(. Then I panic. It's like it wants certainty of me doing a bad thing so I can isolate as a bad person without a doubt. Anyone else feel like this? it really sucks rn and I could use encouragement :/ thanks
I have a twin sister and in their relationship they love each other so much and I know It’s not a good idea to compare relationship but they seem to love them more than in my personnal relationship and that makes me question if I ever loved my boyfriend and it’s takes this doubts like I’m a lesbian etc because i think I have hocd too so yea.. any help
Many people will reply with, “Maybe, maybe not” if you’re seeking reassurance. But those are words to live by. You don’t actually say it every single time or else that’d become a compulsion and it would also be impossible. You have to live by the statement “maybe, maybe not” by accepting the uncertainty of life and whatever your OCD is demanding of you. It will take time to get used to but you will get there eventually if you live by that statement. Everyone has to eventually—or else their life will be quite difficult—even if they don’t have OCD.
Currently feeling really bad because I saw a classmate of mine hugging another one for absolutely ages and she seemed a bit uncomfortable but idk! So I was telling my friends about it and did a demonstration and my other friend put it in the group chat with the classmates and no context. Then the classmate said I looked cute and wholesome. I feel awful now because I can't say the real reason why I did it and I just want to disappear. I feel like such a terrible person.
Anyone else feeling like no matter what they do they can never be a good person? I’ve been having so many intrusive thoughts like: “you’re this, you’re that, are you being a narcissist, a manipulator, a fake person, doing this or that and you’re gonna mess up in this or that and hurt that person’s feelings or someone else’s”. It hs been so exhausting becaude I feel like no matter how much I try being good for others I’m also believing I’m this awful person. Like, I definitely have my things and I have made and still do lots of mistakes, I have a lot of characteristics that are not so great but it’s so emphasised that I can’t handle it anymore, it’s so many accusations and I cant cope. I don’t want to go anywhere, I’m scared of doing things wrong and messing up my friendships and relationships, of being seen as this or that and I don’t even have the self esteem for that. It’s making me so sad, because I wish I could be all of these things that my thoughts are demanding, to be extremely good, but I just know how to give my best and trying the most but I can’t deal with this pressure.
To get better, you have to accept the uncertainty of life and allow yourself to sit with uncomfortable feelings. But that’s not just a lesson for OCD— that’s a life lesson. Emotions will feel good and bad. No one knows the ins and outs of life because life is uncertain and unpredictable. Everyone, not just people with OCD, has to realize those two factors that make us human beings.
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Start practing mindfulness now because it takes time. I’ve been practicing mindfulness for 5–going onto 6–years now. But it took 3 years to feel the effects of mindfulness. Why does it take so long to fully immerse yourself? Because we spend years obsessing over ourselves and everything around us, we’re involved in fighting shadings everything that has to do with our mind, and we’re trying to pick apart every single detail of life and ourselves… instead of letting everything be as it is, detaching from feelings and observing them, and staying in the present moment.
Everytime I feel good for some days (or weeks or months if I'm lucky enough) in a row, without obsessions or harmful intrusive thoughts, I always start thinking that I am fine, that I'm healed, that I'm never going to have them again because I have the control. Specially now that I have a lot more information about the disorder. I doubt if I actually have OCD or if it they were just isolated episodes. I even feel guilty that I have considered having OCD when there are other people feeling terrible all the time, while I have periods in which I feel okay. I feel like an intruder. Does someone relate? Any thoughts?
You’ve probably already seen my posts a million times (sorry) but I need some advice. I went to confession and I forgot to add something. If you’re meaning to confess something by a word, let’s say thoughts for dreams, does that count? Or would you have to confess it separately. ( I get really stressed over these things)
Had my first erp session today and it was hard shall I keep going ?
Im in a really difficult place. I have had ROCD symptoms ever since dating my now husband. My doubts began to be about my love for him, is he the one, etc. When we got engaged and before that I was also filled with questions about what do I want with my life and fears of getting married keeping me from fulfilling/exploring my dreams. Fast forward and we have been married for 2 years. I still had those doubts but developed a fear of sex (had sex related ocd themes as a teenager) and this has made intimacy hard and put a strain on our relationship. We have been doing couples therapy for intimacy but it hasnt really helped. I am thinking I need ERP help, because even without physical intimacy, I am still filled with fears related to sex that I obsess over. The strain of all this and my intrusive thoughts have also led me to contemplate divorce. These intrusive thoughts have left me feeling depressed, loss of appetite, unable to sleep. Recently my husband expressed sadness about our lack of intimacy and my doubts about wanting to have kids (his big dream). It triggered even more anxiety and I kept thinking, should we just end this now? I have no energy to plan for kids and one of my obsessions is "do I really want kids? What if I dont?" I didnt dare say that though, I dont want to hurt him and I do love him, he is what I would want in a life partner. But I am struggling so much with my anxiety that its making it hard for me to function. How do I handle all of this when it feels so real and when there seem to be actual reasons for giving up on our relationship (fear of engaging in sex, not sure if I want kids). I would love to have the type of carefree life I see other couples have but I cant deal with all this. I feel stuck, dont want to do something I regret. My worst fear is hurting him. I have struggled to see all this as OCD since it overlaps with life things that feel so real. Wouldnt it make sense to call it quits if sex is problematic? But my thinking is obsessive and I have a history of OCD. Why do I keep feeling like giving up on us and how do I turn this around? Its hard.
i wish i was really alright, there’s such an emptiness inside and all this on my head has ruined so much more, i feel bleak
Why does my ocd get worse when I’m on keto?
For the first time in a long time I’m filled with vengeance and ambition to take down the people who make our lives hard. We have to speak out and make ourselves known so our struggles aren’t waiting their turn to be brought into the limelight. I’m tired of no one knowing what the hell OCD is. From now on we should be entitled to exist without being mistaken for so many things we’re not. Every quirk, every facial expression, every routine, every thought that we’ve ever had should be accounted for. And anyone who stigmatizes it can be left behind and forgotten.
I hate feeling contaminated, food makes me feel contaminated not necessarily that the food is poisoned but just the feeling of eating food and having food in my stomach feels so terrible and gross like my whole body is dirty Also breathing and air makes me feel Contaminated but you have to breath. But it's feels so bad. Also my shirt sleeves have wholes in them from using them instead of using my Hands so now they also feel contaminated and like they aren't working properly. Also it's allergy season so everyone is coughing And that is super triggering
most of the time i just feel not right or bleh in my brain if that makes sense
I have no symptoms and it’s like I really want to break up! I am having anxiety but this doesn’t feel like the standard ROCD at all.. I kept crying and I just want to be how I was again! My relationship means a lot to me despite the issues that it has right now! I know deep down my feelings are still there…. My emotional connection feels gone… I constantly feel this.. I can’t tell if I just want relief or if I actually wanna break up.. it hurts bc I love him… everyday is a constant battle with myself and I hate it… 😢 I just want to love him again!
I keep getting told that I’m not doing anything but it’s still hard to get over these thoughts because they feel so real and they are so bad they make me panic
why can’t people just be happy with their first love?? like why are people so hung up on dating around i don’t get it. i just want to be happy with my first love but i feel like i can’t knowing that so many people say you should not and that you should date around before settling down. is this true in your experiences?
So I have this toxic friend who is very manipulative and draining to be around. She would flaunt every accomplishment soooo much, use ppls insecurities against them, and in her mind she has never been wrong. I started hanging out with another friend more because it got kinda out of control, and she blew up at us. Then she kept asking over text what she did wrong and I wouldn’t fully answer cause i knew what would happen. But she wasn’t satisfied and so I worked for like an hour with my mom to try and make it sound nice and polite. Then she comes back with saying I was the one being manipulative and that I’ve been a horrible person and a toxic friend, etc. I was honestly hoping the friendship might end cause I’m sick of everything going on but then she acted all normal at school today. And then at the end of school she acted rly sad and now she’s gonna blame it all on me so idk what to do. I keep thinking I’m the wrong one here but then I remember what all she’s done in the past. Ik the whole doubting if I’m right thing is part of her plan, but could some of the severe overthinking have to do with OCD?
I've been suffering from POCD already for 4 months. Iad fear, I had anxiety and differed tgoughts that changed each other durring this period.And...I can't understand what is going on now, and how it's related to OCD. There is few things: 1) I keep checking the age of any girl that I see on the street, social media, public place etc. to make sure she is not underage. 2) When I go to work on subway and see attractive young girl, even if she is 18 I'm afraid that she is not, because she looks young, but I paid attention, and I start staring to make sure that she is not underage and If she is that I'm not attracted. 3) When I see adult womans age 27-30 I have strange feeling of anxiety and that I'm not attracted to them anymore like before. I look at their body parts, scan my body for any good or bad signs, and feel that level of arousal is lower. Main trigger in this suation is old adult look and body. For some reason I have strange thought in my head, like what if they will look too old for me and it means I'm pedophile. MAIN thing, it feels like perception of object of attraction is distorted. I work with my therapist and feel better but I can't solve this particular moment and connect it with OCD, I can't even explain it.
how do people cope with dealing with the uncertainity when its something so major and terrifying. i feel awful when i deal with the uncertainity because what if its just me covering up the fact i couldve done something disgusting. i know i didnt but my ocd wont leave me alone with the " what ifs "
Hi. Does anyone have any helpful tips for when your OCD urges you to ruminate and analyse an intrusive thought. I try to ignore the thoughts, but it feels disstresing and no matter what i distract myself with it’s always in the back of my mind bothering me?
Finally accepted my OCD. For years, I’ve tried to stop and ignore my intrusive thoughts. I always separated myself with my OCD but I learned to accept that it’s ME. Like, this is with me forever and I cannot do anything about it, just learn how to manage it in a healthy way. I think that’s what really helped me start my recovery.
I lost my mom in 2019 then a year later I lost my home in a wildfire. My family and I no longer speak and I have all of two friends at 41 years old. To add to that I'm also disabled. Both my OCD and anxiety is beginning to show more and nights are really difficult because I feel very alone like theres no one to turn too to a point where it's hard to be in my room by myself. I'm glad I survived alot and I value my life so I'm okay when it comes to that I just feel extremely lonely at times. Very rarely get hugged which I understand why these days but I miss it still.
i think i’m starting to understand sexual attraction and my experience with it on a whole new level. maybe some of these reflections could help others with soocd! arousal and sexual attraction are two different things. you can get aroused by many people, but sexual attraction is the mental state of actually wanting to engage in sex - in real life. what i’m starting to realize about myself is that i don’t experience sexual attraction like most people do and i might be demisexual. i need to form an emotional bond with a man in order for me to feel sexual attraction (which is totally different than simply wanting to form a deeper bond before having sex) most people see someone they find attractive and want to have sex with them. now that i think about it, i don’t feel that with anyone ahaha and i actually get a little weirded out and confused when people talk about sex. like just because you think someone’s attractive, you want to have sex with them? why? i can get aroused by different sexual fantasies and erotica that don’t align with my orientation, but when it comes to actually having a sexual attraction to someone, it is with a man and it will come to me only when i’m emotionally connected to him. then the sexual desire follows and it’s usually romantic in nature, but sometimes solely for pleasure
I’m watching Nathan Petersons video on OCD vs denial and when he talks about what denial is I’m getting intrusive thoughts of “ your totally doing what denial is” even though I’ve been dealing with intrusive thoughts about this for two years straight… plus I was getting intrusive thoughts when I heard the word straight and I was getting HOCD intrusive thoughts of “p3n15” before more intrusive thoughts of “your anxious of being straight” when being straight is all I want and desire…
My brain can’t stop trying to figure out my sexuality and it’s horrible. I can find both men and women attractive so thought I might be bi, but then I don’t often want sex with my boyfriend so I’m worried I could be a lesbian. I can identify with bi or asexual quite happily but thinking about being a lesbian fills me with so much dread and anxiety. On Saturday I had the best day with my boyfriend. I felt so in love for most of the day which was a triumph considering I’ve had ROCD for the whole of the relationship. There was a time I looked at him and I honestly could’ve cried because I loved him that much. Surely I wouldn’t feel like that if I was a lesbian? I’ve always had crushes on boys growing up, but they were always romantic ones. When I thought of love growing up it was always romantic, I always felt a little alienated because I wasn’t interested in sex and sexual acts. Now, I enjoy sexual things with my boyfriend but he has to work to get me in the mood. I’m worried this means I’m not sexually attracted to him and what this means. But the love I feel sometimes is so intense and fills me with happiness. My mind can’t rest until I’ve figured it out