Welcome to
the NOCD Community

I used to have religious OCD. Still kinda do. Accidentally thought something bad about God once, panicked thought something bad about the Holy Spirit. Fell into doom. This was recently after recomitting myself to Christ. Since then I pretty much gave up. Unfortunately, it also led to me compromising my morals many times because I figured I was going to hell anyway. I wish I knew what OCD was then. I think it would have saved me a lot of pain. I no longer have a relationship with God, and fear I never will again.

Right now ive been going through extreme ocd for 11 months and tried telling my family about it and gets constantly shut down then my mom acts so confused when I don’t want to talk to her or anyone in the house. She that only thing I should be worried about to my hair and how I have a roof over my head etc. btw ive been getting sleep paralysis, lucid dreaming and bad dreams most nights. Then have to wake up with my most agitating thoughts and it’s just a repeated cycle everyday?! And I want to tell my friends about it but convinced they’ll be the worst which would make me be the blame for everything EVERYTHING IS MY FUCKING FAULT like I’m stressed right now because my mental health and staying silent trying to cope is too much

I was trying to sleep in an aunt house and I’m suffering from nightmares or when I take naps or sleep I dream horrible things, and I took a little nap and I was about to start having a nightmare and I woke up. There’s a person that lives here and he’s not even here but I was about to have a dream with him it’s so scary he’s not even my family member or anything. And like it’s a delicate topic. But it’s the feeling that I can’t even sleep sometimes without dreaming this things that are so scary . And the groinal responses are about to kill me ! This is truly destroying my life I don’t know what to do I don’t want to be like this but I’m too tired to stay awake and too tired to sleep

I think it's important to be able to make fun of yourself and joke about these things, so, just for fun, what's the silliness obsession you've had? Here's mine: when I was six I convinced myself that my overdue library books would create a butterfly effect that would end the world

Hey guys recently I been facing anxiety because I have a fear that I acted on something I know I didn't do but it feels real because it felt like I had attraction and arousal to a younger photo of a ex gf I feel so weird feel so anxious I need help Idk what to do

Im clearly mentally deranged. Do someone like me deserve to love after i hurt so many people and lied and even searched stuff online that feels like it was p*do and also i think i emotionally abuse people and i emotionally neglected my animals and i killed my fish by neglect and

Hello all. I'm new here. I've been having a horrendous time trying to beat repentance prayers. Please if you have advice I'm desperate. The things I'm fighting are: - "feelings" that I did something wrong - actually doing something wrong but not being able to pray quickly - rituals having to do with feet movements, hand movements, where I'm facing when I pray

Today marks my third day on 150 mg of Sertraline, and I've been noticing some symptoms or issues that could be related? I'm wondering if anyone else deals or has dealt with something similar? I've been having really vivid dreams and nightmares, and when I wake up from them, I'm DRENCHED in sweat. Like absolutely soaked. But besides that, I'm extremely anxious. Even the dreams I can't remember leave me feeling off, and then I spiral wondering what they were about. Then there's not being able to cry? I'm not incapable of feeling emotion, but the tears feel trapped, and I just get nauseous if anything. There's been a couple of times where I've been able to cry, but it's like on and off 😭 Oh, and the last thing is constantly feeling hot? Like my face will feel flushed, but the rest of my body is a normal temperature. It's weird🧍‍♀️

I was driving when I passed by 2 kids playing with a ball in their front yard, their ball made it to the street, I slowed down and continued my route and looked back to to make sure they’re ok and when I got home I started getting intrusive thoughts that I ran over the kid 😢

I bought some books on OCD because I like education and would like to know a little more behind why I feel or think this way. I opened up to my mom about this and she keeps saying I’m obsessed with having OCD, she doesn’t actually believe I have it, and that I forced myself to have those thoughts. She then told me she’s going to ask her mental health provider (she’s a nurse) if you can give yourself a mental illness because she said there’s no way someone could spiral out of control within a few days the way I did.

WHY is it so bad?? who was gonna tell me 16 was just DREAD, my ocd has flared up worse than ever and i can’t go to therapy weekly anymore. im getting worse and i can’t do it. I just want to give up.

I don’t know if this is ok to post here but I have no where else to go now that my girlfriend left me. I’m so broken and my OCD is really bad. So when I was younger I struggled with a lot of inappropriate behaviors towards some of my siblings and cousin. They also had inappropriate behaviors towards me and we were all pretty young but different ages apart. None of us really understood at the time we were being inappropriate. I am now 22 years old and it’s been 10 years since I last struggled with making any mistake like I did when I was ages 9-12. I feel so much extreme guilt and shame every single day and I feel like a horrible person. I worry about how my behaviors may have harmed people when I was younger and I feel so ashamed. I keep replaying the events in my head every day even though I can’t remember the full details so it’s blurry. I would never hurt anyone and have never done something to someone in a real way like that. I was just not appropriate when I was a kid. Part of it is due to my exposure to sexual content at a very young age. It made me act inappropriately towards people I knew because I thought it was normal. I just feel like such a disgusting person for my past mistakes growing up. As a teenager I didn’t struggle with the same things but I had bad intrusive sexual thoughts. It caused me to have weird behaviors by myself but not towards anyone in a real way. I haven’t done anything bad like that in about 6 years now. When I was 17 was the last time I remember ever making any inappropriate mistakes like that. I’ll never make them again and I have no desire to do bad things. I have changed and learned so much since back then and would never do anything to hurt someone as an adult. I’ve been carrying this extreme guilt and shame around for many years now and I feel like if people knew all my wrongs from when I was a kid/teen that they’d think I was a disgusting monster. I’ve carried this guilt and shame with me through my adult relationships and my friendships. It’s eating me away. I opened up to my girlfriend about it that I was dating for a year and a half and she told me that I was just a kid and that what I did back then isn’t who I am, especially if I feel guilt and remorse for it and have changed my ways, which I have drastically. It helped me for a while. Unfortunately she left me recently for her own personal struggles and reasons and since then I’ve been spiraling back into a cycle of OCD and replaying the past events from my childhood/teenage years. I don’t know how to shake the horrible feeling and to stop constantly shaming myself. Do I deserve happiness and to move forward. Sometimes I feel like I deserve to die for my past mistakes. Will God or anyone else forgive me? I need advice.

I’m so scared I’ll be stuck in this forever soo soo scared

I think what hinders my progress the most is that I just can’t believe that this is the way I think. I deal with these thoughts every day and just feel so disgusted. I understand ocd clings onto what we care about the most, but why with such distressing, vivid, disgusting thoughts?? I hate it. I know acceptance is the only way but it’s so hard. Why can’t I just think normally and not make everything so weird in my head. It’s like I’m not even truly in the moment I’m always worried about how I’m perceived by others if I did something that may make them think of me as a monster because of my thoughts.

So I have been diagnosed with GAD and OCD and my psychiatrist prescribed me with zoloft 🤔 but I dont know im really hesitant to start medication because im scared of the side effects and ik afraid of relying on a medication for a long time. Does anyone else take zoloft? What is it like? Any side effects?

Does anyone else's OCD play really gruesome nasty movie scenes in their heads over and over to torment you (even if you haven't actually watched the movie all the way through/seen it in a long time) almost to say "this is what's going to happen to you."

(21+ ONLY: TRIGGER WARNING) I honestly feel so overwhelmed by my thoughts—so overwhelmed that I honestly don’t care anymore. I feel like I’m accepting the fact that I’m a monster and have always been a monster. I broke down last night because of these thoughts but I wouldn’t tell anyone if they asked. It wouldn’t make sense to them. This morning, I was watching a body cam video and the person that was arrested was traumadumping about their past SA. I felt like I liked the thoughts and images I got from it. And instead of being disgusted, I let it happen. What does this mean? Does this mean that I’m a monster? Am I a just a monster in disguise?

Yesterday I had a panic attack from OCD fears. I live alone, so in my panic I called my mum just to get some emotional support. It did not go well. I was asking for reassurnce to much and basically she got annoyed with me and started to chastise me. She said I was being ridiculous and accused me of just making up my symptoms to emotionally manipulate her. She even went as far as threatening to call the police on me to have me sectioned. I feel so humiliated. I know that I can be annoying during my panic attacks, and that my OCD puts a massive toll on my familiy. But I don't want to manipulate people. Now, I feel like an abuser. In these moments, seeing how much my weakness makes my family suffer makes me just want to not be here anymore.

I’ve seen wayyyy too many negative posts on here (I totally get it)…but can someone please share some positive experiences? Doesn’t have to be so grand, it could be just that you achieved a small goal with your ocd! I don’t want to continue feeling drowned by this debilitating disorder. I want to see what has helped some of you! So we can all encourage each other! 😊

I keep having this overwhelming thought of "I need to break up with her," however I really don't want to. It causes me so much anxiety when I try to fight the urge to the point that I'm bed ridden and unable to work. Is this normal for ROCD or am I just fighting my actual feelings?