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the NOCD Community

Very worried right now that I’m a narcissist! I fear that I only do good things for self gain / because I feel like I HAVE to. And that I don’t actually care about anyone or anything other than myself. Ugh!

How do you tell if it’s real attraction or ocd ? I feel so confused about attraction and sexual attraction ever done I been getting incest ocd . Part of me knows it’s ocd and the other part is low key scared it’s not. I don’t want to have attraction toward my brother or any family members. I just want this to stop. I keep praying to god that I go back to the Naja I used to be and I don’t think he’s listening. Please help .

Has anyone seen any improvements taking Prozac for contamination OCD?

Anyone who has HOCD get intrusive thoughts during masturbation? And does it mean anything if before HOCD you get intrusive thoughts like that when doing so as well?

I think it would be awesome if we had some people who overcame certain types of OCD (HOCD, ROCD, POCD, Harm OCD) post on here what they did or how they got through them so others can see that there is hope and what the processes are to overcome these. Even if it’s those amongst our community right now.

I went to my therapist last monday and... wow I feel so good these last days. The more I talk with her about hocd, the best I feel. And the less Im thinking about this. I mean. Is still there, but it doesn't disturb me like before. I don't need to make a compulsion about it. And sometimes I have relapses and I'm going to have them in the future too because Im not perfect, but I really feel less anxiety than before. Im starting to feel like before, like who I am. Like the world is not ending and even if I am angry or frustrated sometimes because I have doubts or I don't know what is going to happen... you know, I'll be okay.

I tried having sex with a girl I had sex with four months ago but I couldn’t get in the mood. I couldn’t get even half an erection. All the time while having intrusive gay thoughts. Inside my mind I was like “see, your gay” “you are not enjoying this” Eventually I couldn’t handle this and stopped making out with her. Now I’m even more depressed. Idk what’s wrong, I can’t take this anymore. The thing is I see guys that are attractive and I get a groinal response and my mind goes into the doubt spiral again. The thing is I know I genuinely have no interest in relationships or anything sexual with guys so why does my mind is literally CONVINCING me that I do? I really can’t take this anymore. I’m having suicidal thoughts for the first time in years.

Anyone else that also has OCD exactly targeted at what you love the most? Like your innermost values, your favorite interests, the things you look forward to the most in life. Like I’ve pulled myself away from all the good in my life because that’s what the OCD latches onto. Like I used to love reading about psychology, now psychology is a freaking nightmare to my OCD, I used to be so happy, optimistic and cheerful and reflected a lot on all of life’s wonders but now I have intrusive suicidal thoughts and scary, existential/philosophical OCD making me avoid deep thoughts/subjects altogether. I used to be such a romantic and chased all the love expeiences I could have, now I push every damn guy away because my skin crawls at te thought of love and connections. I used to be very emotionally open and all, and now I scream at any feeling and try to suppress it. I used to be a social butterfly and now I can barely talk to people anymore. I used to be so excited to grow up to become a mom, a wife and work with people who need my help but now those are the most scary things I’ve ever heard of. I used to have such a strong self esteem and could be really cool and confident, and now I feel weak as hell and very insecure (and doubtful, duh, OCD) I used to pride myself in being a wonderful person with empathy and kindness, and now I always worry I’m a narcissist. I used to be very in tune with myself, knew myself very well and was always very grounded but now I’m depersonalized and whatever identity was there before certainly isn’t here right now. You feel me? And even more ironic is it that I’m beyond terrified of being depressed and committing suicide, but all in all having the joy quite literally stolen from your life is rather fucking draining and depressing.

I know OCD can be genetic. My grandmother has severe contamination OCD and I have pure O (as well as other ones that I have had in the past). But I’ve only read about how if you have family members in your immediate family with OCD, you have a higher chance of getting it. Is it possible that I have OCD from my grandma?

Has anyone ever felt the need to overshare/confess things to their partner that they didnt need to know?

I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE I CANT IT ANYMORE THE GROINAL RESPONSES FEEL TOO REAL THEY FEEL JUST LIKE REAL AROUSAL. AN ALMOST FULL ERECTION. IM IN TEARS I HAVENT SLEPT FOR 24 HOURS MY LIFE IS RUINED PLEASE HELP ME IM FEELING VERY SAD

Anybody have nice recovery stories? Personally I don’t believe the whole “OCD is something you manage, not cure” thing as I think it’s just the medicinal companies looking to have you popping pills your entire life. Anyways, I KNOW that recovery is possible, and I know that it’s very inspiring and motivating to hear from people that has been in OCD hell that got out on the other side. So please, if you have any stories, share! I can give you a little story; my mom got herself some bad Harm OCD when she got her first child, my big sister, and intense amounts of anxiety from the OCD and agoraphobia too. In the last 20 years, she’s had two panic attacks. She’s over it! She’s out and about and haven’t known intrusive thoughts for ages

Hi I really need help. I really want to get better and want to work on recovery but I am too scared to look for a therapist. I had a very bad experience before, my family is not really supportive of the idea and I have very graphic sexual intrusive thoughts. I am convinced that it will be so embarrassing and humiliating to talk about this again. But I know that without proper guidance I am gonna have to deal with this forever.. has anybody advice?

OCD about driving. I am a 25 year old and am currently having really bad OCD about driving. I often fear that I am going to hit someone with my car or already have and did not realize it. Anything can set me off, such as a bump in the road that I did not explicitly see and point out, driving in an area with a lot of pedestrians, driving at night, driving in residential areas, or driving while a bit tired. This happens all of the time. I often check my rearview mirror for signs of an accident or reactions from drivers. I used to turn around and check a lot, but after reading various articles have stopped doing so and for the purposes or ERP. I have been doing my best with the ERP, but sometimes it is hard to resist the urge to go back and check, especially with those specific instances that I listed above. I just wanted to know if anyone else on here has this kind of OCD and how you deal with it/the best methods for continuing to work with it.

i have this girl ocd crush or i dont know how to call it. shes very pretty and all but i dont want to be together with a girl. my ocd makes me feel these weird anxiety butterflies

Anyone struggle with false memories? If so, how do you cope?

Antine with false memories ever get it that you are 95% sure said thought/memory didn't happen but your mind is still convincing you its real

I can’t stop checking. Someone help me break the cycle, what do I do?

Hi Guys. I’ve been prescribed 10 mg of Prozac to help managed my OCD. I’ve been particularly struggling the past 10 months more than what I used to be able to manage on my own. I’m aware of the side effects but I’m terrified since I have big deadlines in school and I also work long shifts at my job. If I get fatigue, dizziness, nausea etc. I’m worried that my performance at school and work just tanks. I don’t have the ability to take time off from school or work so it’s really scary. At the same time, I know it could also help me. I’m considering waiting 4-5 weeks for the busy period to end but there will always something new that can come up. For those who had a bad experience with Prozac what would you do? For those who had a great experience, please also share. Thanks.

If I’m up for 12 hours a day.... I’d say at least, around 9 of those hours are involving something with OCD.... my mind is exhausted....