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the NOCD Community

anyone who has recovered from this theme, how did they do it because i’m really struggling, does medication help?

IDK WHY I HAVE THIS FEAR and even if i know that this is not logic im still scared that im a psyhopath like omg im so scared how do i get over this im so scared this fesr hase been here for 2 months does anyone have advice?

Hi all, I’m planning to start anti depressants for OCD just wondered if anyone has found this effective with intrusive thoughts? I’m scared if once they have worked I go off them and have a relapse?

Hi all, my name is Ryan and this is the first post I am sharing on this app. I struggle with a lot of forms of OCD, as I’m sure many of you do as well. My first memory of experiencing OCD symptoms was when I was 2.5 ish. However I did not get formally diagnosed until I was 25 after the OCD becoming debilitating during 2020. I got prescribed medicine then. It helped a bit but while on it I still experience symptoms. I feel like medicine silences the irrationality a bit. But it’s always still there. I’ll be honest I don’t like taking medicine. I don’t like the way it makes me feel, how it numbs some things but intensifies others. When I have gone off my medicine for one reason or another my symptoms definitely intensify. I am currently off and strongly considering starting again because OCD is starting to control my life again. Since I went without medicine for 25 years of life it’s so hard to justify taking it. I sort of feel guilty, like I was able to do it without before. My OCD has gotten worse throughout the years but I also remember some really hard times before I was diagnosed and I got through it. I wish there was a better option. The medicine isn’t perfect but it’s something. It’s a constant struggle for me.

I'm freaking out because I saw a tiktok on cocsa and now I'm afraid I did it when I was super little. I had to be like 6 or so but I can't remember, i just remember being little, not even 10 yet i dont think. I remember i was with my younger brother and my dad and we were all playing hide and seek in a hotel. And then me and my younger brother were hiding in the bathroom. I remember us giggling and then I remember making him lift his shirt? Or us taking turns lifting our shirts? Then im not sure if we showed each other our genitalia or not, or if his pants were down. I genuienly cant remember but i think we did (me and a friend in lile 1st grade got in trouble for doing that once, so i wouldnt put it past me and i keep getting a vague memory of it so maybe we did). Then i remember kissing his stomach before my dad was like 'what are you guys doing?'. And we both just laughed and left the bathroom. When I was really young, I was exposed to porn and it messed up my brain. I dont think it was innocent even though I didn't understand like what I was doing because I was really little. Hes from my dads side (who i dont talk to anymore) so i havent seen or spoke to him in years. I weve gotten along before we stopped talking though, but still. What if I traumatized him?? What of I did cocsa or intended to/almost did?? What if he doesn't remember now but will remember later and be traumatized??

Does anyone else see someone attractive of the same sex and start intrusively thinking things like “cute” or something beyond just acknowledging them as good looking? I avoid looking at good looking same sex people on tv shows because I get those intrusive thoughts and it makes me question what does that mean of me. I don’t want to be gay and I feel so uncomfortable and it feels like denial every time I try and do a compulsion. It’s hard to look at men on TV shows because my mind comes up crazy stuff and I don’t know what it means

Why must my OCD always make up the scariest scenarios to torment me with. Some guy was hitting on me on reddit and the convo didn't get far before I just blocked him but now my OCD is like 'he's gonna be mad and DOX YOU/STALK YOU' huh??? how did we get here?? now I wanna compulsively delete my account .. These new meds better kick in fast T-T

Because of years of scrupulous OCD the very idea of religious services and activities brings up apprehension and stress. How can I rewire my brain to learn to enjoy these things?

How can i know that im not actually faking my attraction to hide my denial and hiding my real attraction like its so scary and confusing

especially since ive recovered a lot from my bad episode of like religious “ocd” (im nto diagnosed) i feel like idk a part of me just wants my ocd compulsions back like i enjoyed all the control i had in my life and like i sort of liked how ill i was and thats so wrong to say but i dont know how to get rid of this feeling because ive had it for months atp

This isnt really OCD related but rather just a vent post. I wanted to leave my feelings somewhere so feel free to ignore this. I feel like im going to die at this point, since i can remember ive been dealing with thisbfeeling of alienation and loneliness (yknow, the autistic experience) vut i dont know how longer i can keep up with it. I feel like ive failed at the most basic things that make a human being, making friends, having a job, studying, romance. I see everyone around me reach greater heights while i am stuck in one place and i feel like im going to rot in the spot. I only have two friends, one of them is away in another state preparing to be a priest and we can go for months without talking and still act so close, but im afraid hes ultimately going to leave. My other friend, my best friend for 7/8 years is also drifting away this very moment, she's in her last year of uni and will grafuate as a technician, she has a wonderful boyfriend and friends who lives overseas and she has plans to leave the country in some future. Im obviously beyond happy for them and what theyre achieving but i cant keep acting like im not rotting with envy, they have so much going on for themselves and so many people around them i feel like at any moment i will no longer be part of their lives and theyre going to be okay with it. I cant keep acting like that wouldnt kill me inside, i love seeing them succed but i hate knowing that im such a failure in just doomed to fall behind and just watch as everyone moves on. Its always been like this with every friendship ive had and at this point i dont know how longer am i willing to take it, this crippling feeling is something you never get used to, it always hurt the same and living out of resignation is horrible. i dont want to live a life repeating this painful meaningless cycle.

Im an athletic guy and a couple years ago i had a very badly broken ankle. An open fracture. I eventually had to have it fused. So i will never be able to run for fun again or do some other sports i love. And its all i think about. Its hard for me to focus on anything because im obsessed with the mistake i made that caused the injury. I was drinking. I feel very depressed because sports mean a lot to me. I feel like a completely different person. Im lost. Maybe i should take medication, idk. Not too thrilled with side effects of them. Anyone have thoughts on what i should do?

Everything is triggering my ocd thoughts right now. It started very quickly the other day. I’ve tried all the relaxation techniques and little therapy techniques. I don’t know how to get out of it. Anyone know how to make them stop. Or like how long this anxiety and stuff is gonna last for

I have to go to church tomorrow and I just feel so embarrassed to even step foot in there. My OCD is really based off of religion, and when I walk into a church or see a religious word or name I freak out. I feel like ik disrespecting God because of these thoughts I'm having. Any tips on how to cope with this?

I would love to hear if anybody has experience or help regarding this this :) I was once having this OCD thought and I was carrying out my compulsions, all of a sudden I felt like I had just gone out of touch and like I had just completely shut off and disconnected mentally and emotionally, I felt my stress levels drop but not in a comforting way. I have been reading that depersonalisation come as a result of intense stress. This particular thought that I am speaking about is my worst yet, it brings me so much stress, could this be depersonalisation? Ever-since then I’ve felt like I’m not me, everything that once seemed familiar wasn’t anymore (not in a dramatic way) but I feel like I’m so disconnected, that’s the best word I could use since the feeling is very distant and weird. How do I get out of this? I feel like the only time I feel remotely connected and present is when I think of that time when I was having the thought and I shut off, it’s almost like I’m mentally still in that moment. Please share any help or tips if you have experienced this before or have knowledge about it :)

im scared that im a psyhopath and that im just pretending to be a nice person and i that i dont have empathy im so scared omg

This is a new thing for me…having a name for the thoughts and feelings I have. As a Christian, having religious OCD is terrifying. I want my faith so badly but I constantly fear “doing it wrong” or upsetting God. Where is my fear coming from? Is my fear evil? What if my doubt is evil? Ugh. Tiring.

Is this normal??? I can’t handle it… makes me so sad i want to cry.. and then i definetly feel my sucidal thoughts are true??

Throughout my life really at this point… I’ve suffered from intrusive thoughts regarding attraction to the same gender… Often these intrusive thoughts target people I know and I get hung up on the question of, “What if I’m attracted to this person?” I then constantly “check” to see if I’m genuinely attracted to said person and each time I do check very rarely am I met with reassurance but a strong feeling of anxiety. It’s happened only a handful of times, but it just terrifies me to think that we have no choice over who we find attractive.

Tomorrow I'm going on a trip to a city that is an hour away from my home for my best friend's birthday and her boyfriend's tagging along. I'm excited, there's not much to do where I live and there will be plenty of opportunities where were headed, shopping wise. But for the most part, I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll freak out in front of them, I've been having panic attacks frequently that are brief, and I really don't want to ruin her day. I can't expect for it to not happen, but all I wish is that it'd be brief and that I'll be able to manage it. I don't want to avoid this, it's her big day and it'll just worsen my condition more. Does anyone have any advice?