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Does anyone else fear they may die in there sleep?

Hi guys! I’m Kells I’m 25 and I was diagnosed ocd when I was around 16. Ever since I can remember I’ve been terrified of losing loved ones. It was about my parents passing away when I was young and now I’m worried constantly that my fiancé will pass when I’m not with him. It’s magical thinking like I have control. But I know I don’t and that’s terrifying. I know logically it’s not likely, but ocd works with fear. And I’m terrified of losing him. I even had a dream when we first started dating saying he would die young and I’m petrified that was a “sign”. The other aspect of my ocd has been religious and afterlife fears. I’m scared of dying and what it’ll feel like. I’m scared that if I don’t believe in a religion like Christianity and it becomes true I will burn in hell. I’m just scared.

I feel like I dont see a whole lot about this specific type of ocd so I just wanted to see if anyone else out there has this same issue! I constantly fear that I am pregnant even if there is absolutely 0% chance that I could be. Im a very safe and cautious person and still I have taken more pregnancy tests than any person I know. I will stare at a clearly negative pregnancy test for like 15 minutes trying to see if i somehow missed the second line on the test. I will even send pictures of the test to other people to make sure they only see one line too. this truly causes me so much distress. ocd sucks.

I feel like there’s two versions of me. I feel like there’s an evil version where my OCD wants me to do urges and be bad and prove I am this person and it is so convincing and it feels like me. Then another version of me where I’m like “duh that’s not me”. But I’m terrified the bad version will win. It feels like “I want” to think of these thoughts. I had a moment today where I was like “yeah I would be this person if it wasn’t illegal” and believed it. Then came out of it and was like “no that’s not true”. I also found myself feeling like I wanted to think of a bad sexual thought during sex.

I’m finding it really hard to comfort my long distance boyfriend he’s really low but I’m also feeling so low and I feel really guilty because he says I’m not there for him I’m trying to comfort him I’m getting so angry at myself because I just am finding it so hard to be there for someone when I’m getting sh thoughts Feel guilty and he thinks I’m making it about me Idk what to do I have no one to talk to because I can’t talk to him about it as he’s going through stuff

Does anyone else struggle with sitting in public seats. I always have to check if the seat is clean or sometimes I wipe it before I sit. At home I have designating “clean” chairs. If there’s a stain on the chair I freak out and assume it’s bodily fluids.

Does anyone else have some “fun” ways they’ve noticed their main reoccurring thought/fear with SO OCD or OCD in general change as you’ve worked on accepting your thoughts? When I really fell down the rabbit hole of SO OCD at the start it centered around, the possibility, that I repressed my sexuality due to a past experience I may have blocked out as a child. As I got started with ERP my main fear of repression then went to that of being in denial. Eventually that moved to a main fear of being a late bloomer with OCD then to a centered fear of not having OCD at all However if the passing thought that caught me after my therapy session today was anything to go by, it may me switching now to using my comfortability of seeing gay scenes and attacking me for not acting on my thoughts if I’m so comfortable with them. Like I’m not truly comfortable with it unless I go out and act on my same sex thoughts It’s funny to see OCD switch tactics/reasons as I grow more and more comfortable with my thoughts, but also frustrating because it still got me distressed for a moment with that new thought after my session today and wishing that that thought doesn’t stick.

A bit hopeless. I feel like my efforts to overcome ocd are mostly in vain.

Does anyone else struggle with sexual orientation OCD? I am a male who identifies as straight but for awhile Thought that I was bi sexual cuz I thought I was experiencing same sex attraction, but now that I’ve become aware that sexual orientation OCD is a thing and has a name, I can see that that is what I was struggling with. Yet, I’ve still had people say to me that I am gay and this n that, and I don’t know why. Maybe it’s cuz I am not as masculine as other men? Maybe cuz I have a higher voice? Maybe cuz i don’t have that strong alpha male posture? I overthink this. Just cuz someone told me that they think i am gay, doesn’t mean I am. This is where my Sexual orientation OCD kicks in, & I start thinking oh my gosh well if this person n that person n that person thinks im gay, then maybe i am! But the thing is is IM NOT! I am attracted to women and I wanna be married and have kids, & I can see how I have been obsessing about my orientation because of what others have said about me. Anyone else dealt with this?

Hi everyone, I recently went on vacation and had dinner at the hotel's buffet. I selected some seafood and placed it on my plate. After that, I used another spoon to add some fruits to my plate, I think the spoon accidentally touched the seafood on my plate. I'm now overwhelmed with anxiety over the possibility that someone allergic to seafood might use that same spoon for fruits and have a reaction. How do you handle these intrusive thoughts? Thank you.

The other day I was in the kitchen and the children I work with were in a rush and I was trying to push them out of the kitchen. When that happened, I was nudging them out with my hands and legs. When I was nudging a child forward, I noticed a sensation in my leg near my crotch area that I was pushing, but it wasn’t gratification and it wasn’t sexual. But I feel awful because I recognized the sensation but didn’t move my body. I continued to push forward. Now I feel like I’ve committed a heinous crime. When it happened it was very subconscious and unaware. I was not imploring myself to do anything else or really anything at all. It was just that weird feeling in my leg but I still feel awful that for 2 seconds I continued to push them forward. It’s driving me insane that I feel like I tried to continue to push forward. Now that I’m writing this, I can recognize that I was not trying to be weird or anything and I think my mind is tricking me. But it still SUCKS!!!!!!! I hate having OCD!!!!! I know I didn’t do anything and I’m a good person. But I don’t know how to be comfortable with this one.

I’ve been with my partner since I was 20. I had one relationship prior to him and little dating experience because I was religious/ covid happened. I’m having extreme OCD that I haven’t dated enough people to see who is truly out there for me/ everyone else has more experience than I do. On top of this, I believe I am bisexual and have never been with a girl (but I have sexual orientation OCD as well so who knows.) What is the best way to go about this that aligns with ERP? Would breaking up my perfectly healthy relationship be giving into my compulsions just to go date others?

Anyone deal with sexual thoughts regarding family members? Makes me sick. I know it’s OCD and I’m constantly trying to remind myself I’ve been here with other content before but it’s so disturbing. Also has anyone had past themes resurface again? Thank you in advance to whoever shares.

I get so scared when I confess that I didn’t confess enough. I have to stop. This is good motivation to get out of this loop. Does this happen to anyone else?

I cannot stop thinking about and judging my girlfriend (almost 23) for sleeping with a 34 year old before we met. She said she didn’t know his age and thought he was younger (I made her find out his age for my own ocd purposes) its ruining our relationship and my view of her. Please someone give me some sort of advice. I thought I was going to break up with her when she told me, but I just am devastated and have no clue what I’m feeling.

Does anyone think ERP therapy costs are really unreasonable? I stopped NOCD because I had BDD concerns, too and now go to another Telehealth therapist who is $225 per session. TWO HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE DOLLARS!!! 😡 I got an email about NOCD going to $210 per 1 hour session. It was $170 when I did it, which was already ridiculous and I felt taken advantage of for sure. Am I the only one who thinks this is just ripping off people when they're down and suffering and desperate for help? Doesn't it seem predatory and exploitative? That is a lot of money . . . and I'm now about $8,500 into getting help for my ROCD and BDDBP. The way I see it, $80 a session would be unreasonably high but $225?!?! $210??!? It’s just Insulting and a scam, especially when people (like me) were suffering so much they couldn’t hold down a job and can already barely afford food and rent. Do you agree?

I m scared I have more than just depression I been depressed for too long been trying to fix it but go back and forth with it I m scared I may need in medicine but I m no on it and I m terrific right now :( maybe I have bipolar or who knows

was hugging my cat and she got annoyed and meowed and i got sad and thought how could anyone hurt any animals then i start getting thoughts like u want to hurt one u want to really hurt one even ur own cats and it made me scared but i have little anxiety it made me sad tho. when i was little i had kicked my dog and that came up in my memories and now im scared i will hurt my pets. when i was younger i was weird and i have memories spaced out of me doing weird/bad stuff that i would never do now but it makes my ocd worse. I hate this :(

Has anyone tried N-Acetyl Cysteine for their OCD? My psychiatrist told me to buy it from the store and try it. Wondering if anyone’s had any experience and what’s it like?

Just watched a video that said that you're unhappy and with the wrong person if you find someone else attractive while in a committed relationship. OBVIOUSLY, I have ZERO desire to cheat... yet the comments and this video triggered me to think WILL.....