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Does anyone have any hobbies that might help occupy my mind? i have a hard time distracting myself with my current hobbies, and i want something i have to think more about. i’m used to coloring, and listening to music, but i feel i need more.

i’m just getting over a pretty bad anxiety attack. it also started when i was making food and a wave of nausea hit me which of course sent me into a spiral. however i started thinking about how i’ve really neglected actually trying to work through my fear and thoughts over getting sick. because i’m so hyperfocused on getting my harm thoughts to diminish and be gone, i haven’t been doing the same for my contamination. i’ve pretty much diagnosed myself with emetophobia. and i know that’s so unhealthy to do especially as someone who’s not diagnosed with anything, but there’s absolutely no way in hell that i don’t have it. i cannot remember a time where being sick wasn’t on the forefront of my mind. and i do physical compulsions for it, but i never really thought i had intrusive thoughts over it. but when this (and past plural) anxiety attack was happening, my mind was telling me “if you just get sick, you won’t have to worry about it?”. then i took a zofran and am having thoughts of “the nausea will come back and you’ll get sick”. my heart is pounding just thinking about it. over the summer when my harm thoughts got extreme, my emetophobia essentially became a backseat thought. where it was still there but i wasn’t that worried over it. and i wished for it to come back but now that it’s here, i would do anything for it to be gone. i’m so back and forth because at least this anxiety is (mostly) keeping me from getting sick as i do anything and everything i can to prevent it. anyways, i’m so sorry this was so long but i had a lot on my mind that i needed to talk about. so much love to y’all 🫶🏻

I just can't believe how quickly my anxiety has gone down on some low to moderate fears! I had some setbacks earlier this week but also some really awesome successes in the small things. I feel like I had a little bit of a breakthrough in my thought process this week.

This disorder has nearly ended my life. Not even 1 hour ago i tried walking into a sea and wanting to end it because of this ocd and the loneliness that comes with it. For anyone out there you are not alone and always know that you have people out there who are by your side.

Sorry in advance if this is kinda gross lol Does anyone have any advice for checking compulsions?? in particular, cleanliness compulsions?? i’m currently having a flair up but i don’t know how to handle it. I can barely stand going to the bathroom, because i never feel like i’ve wiped enough or i’m not clean enough. In particular if I have to poop, even after i make sure i’ve cleaned myself thoroughly i still feel the urge to go back to the bathroom to check. And whenever i pass gas I feel the urge to check my underwear just in case i’ve had an accident. It’s getting so stressful and annoying at this point :// I’m wasting so much time and tissue when I check myself, but i can’t help it. It bothers me so much. I want to stop, but I don’t know what to.

Do you cope with genuine hopelessness? Deep down I am convinced this will never get better. I think about suicide a lot, but that would hurt my family. But even being alive is hurting them because I cannot stop the mental breakdowns. I also cannot afford therapy. But it's the hopelessness. I feel that suicide is inevitable because I cannot live with this. I cannot stop self harm and I have a mental breakdown almost every week and often multiple times a week. The self harm is giving me brain damage. I literally have no hope. None.

I've been dealing with my so-ocd for a bit now and I've been doing pretty good. But i just read someone's comment saying that if you've gone through a questioning phase then that could mean something. I went through a very small questioning phase before i even found out i had ocd. That phase lasted no more than 2 months even if that. I figured out that I was still straight and that is what makes me happy and comfortable.

Someone help how do I know if I’m gsy I was never like this my attraction is gone no anxiety thoughts don’t bother me they feel so forced bro I’m so confused like they were bothering me couple months ago so as the anxiety what is going on with me am I gay?

Would a gay person have intrusive thoughts saying you’re gay?

Anyone scared of being depressed? I have harm ocd and I’m so scared that being depressed will lead me to harm myself or others even though I don’t want to and would never want to. I’m so scared that I’ll stop caring and become one of those people who hurt others. I tell myself I would never do something like that but it’s like I don’t believe it.

so my anxiety has been quite literally awful the past couple weeks , like can’t go into public ect. And I’ve always seen stuff out the corner of my eye , but it made me think what if I’m schizophrenic. I’ve been so dissociated and just scared :( idk

Can I have intrusive feelings as well with ocd? I’m feeling so sad since I saw a post of my ex bf getting engaged last Monday, at the beginning I thought it was normal but then I couldn’t stop thinking about him and our relationship, I feel I miss him but it’s so confusing, why am I missing him? We broke up 7 years ago and I’m in a relationship and love my bf. But I can’t thinking that maybe I want to be with him and imagine how it would be if we try it again, but I don’t know why I’m thinking on that, it all started suddenly after seeing that post :( I feel genuinely sad, I can't help but cry every time I think about him. I don’t know what to do with these feelings b

Right as I’m starting to feel happy again I get hit with what feels like intrusive feelings… sometimes of sadness or anger which then triggers my intrusive harm thoughts. Not sure if this is a mood disorder or just ocd. They don’t feel like what my true feelings should feel like if that makes sense.. ugh the feelings are harder to deal with than the thoughts. Trying to lean into them but it’s hard.

Yesterday my in laws said I could hold my nephew and my head said what if you throw the baby I hate OCD :( I would never harm a baby

Has anyone ever experienced this? I'm at the point in my life where I'm happy. I have good friends, I'm going out, it's almost summer etc. But I'm also struggling really bad with ocd. It's latching onto the fact that I'm enjoying life and giving me so many intrusive thoughts how it could end. I'm so afraid of getting every illness mostly rabies right now. I'm trying really hard to just enjoy life but at the back of my mind there are always these thoughts that scare me so badly. It's like my life is finally worth living and ocd hates that.

Mental Disorders have ruined my entire life... It's just over... Don't know where to vent anymore...

guys im feeling a lot of anxiety right now and l'm very scared. I was searching on reddit on how to disable automatic download for stickers, and while I was in there I found a thread about someone issuing the problem of telegram automatically downloading all media like stickers, images, videos, gifs in the gallery. This activated a horrible trigger in me because I have this horrible memory of someone in telegram sending out of nowhere an explicit illegal **** gif in a groupchat related to minecraft, then I think he deleted afterwards, but I'm not sure if that changed anything. It traumatized me but I had forgotten quickly because I was so young, I was around 13 or less. Now that I developed pocd for a while I started remembering all the past including this, and it triggers me more than anything because it's something real that happened and I can't tolerate it being a part of my memory, that it's something "saved" in my brain" and the fact my eyes saw something like that even though it wasn't my fault makes me feel complicit. Now l'm stressing because "what if my phone automatically downloaded that gif in my gallery without me knowing?" l've already searched on my phone and the previous one and I found nothing, but that it's because they are not the phones that I had when that thing happened. I actually don't know what phone I used. I'm panicking, The old phone doesn't charge, the other one that I think was around that time is not here anymore and I should ask my father but I can't talk to him anymore because he discovered my self harm scars and is abroad. This is not anymore a matter of sitting through distress and letting uncertainty be, this is something that could be real and destroy me. I can't live like this, I have to know for sure that there is nothing like that in my galleries I don't know what to do. I wonder why that dude had to sent something so horrible and ruin my life. I can't practice erp with something like this, and I can't continue living with the uncertainty that there could be something illegal downloaded without my consent in my old phones. I don't know what to do. Yersterday was also very triggering, and now today. I also have to study for a difficult test tomorrow, everything is against me. I don't know what to do. I've been dealing with ocd all of these years alone but everytime I make a step forward ocd sets me back two before. Please help me deal with this situation Somebody.

What advice would you give for someone struggling with religious and relationship ocd? Thank you guys for being here and I’m glad i have a community i can confide in!

guys i'm feeling a lot of anxiety right now and I'm very scared. I was searching on reddit on how to disable automatic download for stickers, and while I was in there I found a thread about someone issuing the problem of telegram automatically downloading all media like stickers, images, videos, gifs in the gallery. This activated a horrible trigger in me because I have this horrible memory of someone in telegram sending out of nowhere an explicit illegal **** gif in a groupchat related to minecraft. It traumatized me but I had forgotten quickly because I was so young, I was around 13 or less. Now that I developed pocd for a while I started remembering all the past including this, and it triggers me more than anything because it's something real that happened and I can't tolerate it being a part of my memory, that it's something "saved" in my brain" and the fact my eyes saw something like that even though it wasn't my fault makes me feel complicit. Now I'm stressing because "what if my phone automatically downloaded that gif in my gallery without me knowing?" I've already searched on my phone and the previous one and I found nothing, but that it's because they are not the phones that I had when that thing happened. I actually don't know what phone I used. I'm panicking. The old phone doesn't charge, the other one that I think was around that time is not here anymore and I should ask my father but I can't talk to him anymore because he discovered my self harm scars and is abroad. This is not anymore a matter of sitting through distress and letting uncertainty be, this is something that could be real and destroy me. I can't live like this. I have to know for sure that there is nothing like that in my galleries. I don't know what to do. I wonder why that dude had to sent something so horrible and ruin my life. I can't practice erp with something like this, and I can't continue living with the uncertainty that there could be something illegal downloaded without my consent in my old phones. I don't know what to do. Yersterday was also very triggering, and now today. I also have to study for a difficult test tomorrow, everything is against me. I don't know what to do. I've been dealing with ocd all of these years alone but everytime I make a step forward ocd sets me back two before. Please help me deal with this situation. Somebody.

I feel like everything in life is just piling up on me and I'm just inches away from just breaking down. Ugh