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Does anyone else struggle to not ask Chat GPT life questions all the time? Technology almost in a way can make it harder to manage OCD.

Sometimes my boyfriend tells me things that make absolutely no sense so I think he’s lying. Anyway. He used to be friends with this girl like 2 and a half years ago and they were only friends for like 2 months. He told me she played with his feelings but he never actually liked her and he just wanted friends because he was new to the school. I guess they had exchanged numbers and when he’d text she’d ghost him a little. They made plans to hangout after school one time but those fell through. Anyway, my boyfriend was interested in me half way through the school year, he really liked me, like a lot. He was a senior and I was a junior. He was really good to me and I never felt insecure. The girl was never relevant until maybe a year ago? She had created an insta account which she never used to have and she was in his insta suggestions. They had no mutuals or anything which made me suspicious. One of his close friends is friends with her. I started stalking her page a lot and comparing. She listens to the same exact music as my boyfriend and she’s literally flawless. I’d bring her up a few times over the course of a few months and he always told me that she was ugly and he just wanted a friend. He went to a party she was at and ik the mutual girl friend they have posts her sometimes. Anyway, I looked at her story today because I started overthinking again and she had posted pictures of herself to the song beetles by apex twin. I also brought her up to my boyfriend again because I was overthinking. She goes by Gracie and everyone calls her that but her real name is grace. My boyfriend will switch between the two when talking about her. He says grace is just a typo though. A few hours later my boyfriend had listened to that same exact song, it was on his airbuds. It was the only song by aphex twin on his airbuds too. I want to throw up because there’s no way he didn’t view her story, that’s was too coincidental. Update: he said he saw the sound in an edit but there’s only like 80 posts under that sound on TikTok and I didn’t see an edit. He can’t find the edit in his watch history either. He originally said he saw it on TikTok but I said there’s no edits of it on TikTok and it’s not in his watch history so now he’s saying it might’ve been on YouTube or instagram. He said he doesn’t know her insta account either but now we’re arguing. He wants me to leave because I never believe him. I confront him about something new everyday even though I really don’t mean to be a burden.

I'm a minor, and I'm embarassed to talk with my parents about this. I have always has intrusive thoughts. Disturbing ones. Since i am a child. Sometimes I ruminated about them, but I usually forgot about them after a while. Now, I've been in this amazing 1 year relationship and I felt real love for the first time. I felt new, loved, I felt ready to marry and have his kids in the momment we had economical stability and could live together. Since march, I've been a mess. In march, I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep (i would have horrible nightmares where I cheated on my boyfriend, most of the times with women), and I would find myself in the same tracksuit 7 days a week, incapable of taking a bath, even tho I am obsessed with my visual image (I am goth, and I love to style my clothes, treat my hair and everything). I talked with him about this, and I cried so much, I asked him "what if we need to take a break?" And ge calmly said he would wait for me all the time i needed, while giving me cookies on the mouth because i was not able to pick them myself. "Depression, erection, whatever, I'll always be here" he said joking. God I love him. We agreed to make a break but we couldn't handle it. We got back later that day. I felt reliefed and that night, I was able to eat and sleep, but next day it was all over again. And with this "you don't love him" thought, these came too: "you are a lesbian", "maybe you like your ex", "look at that guy there, you like him", "you dont give your man attention enough", "you're getting bored", "just by having these thoughts you are already cheating on him", "you don't care anymore if he cheats on you", "HE IS CHEATING ON YOU, YOU ARE TRASH, HE WANTS HIS EX", "your relation will end just like your last one". And this sensation too, that I consider to be the worse: Sometimes I feel like my boyfriend and my ex are mixed up. Context- I broke up with my ex last year, cause he would not give me personal space, and I couldn't take it anymore. I knew what I felt. But now, sometimes my mind tells me that I'm still with my ex, that my pictures with my boyfriend are false, and it's my ex there, my mind tells me I like to think about this but I don't. What if I do?? I'm going crazy. When I look ate the plushies my boyfriend gave me my mind tells me "It was your ex who gave them to you". When I'm watching a serie "that character looks like your ex". And this was the worst situation: once, I was with my boyfriend and we were having sex. Suddenly my mind told me I was having sex with my ex and not with my boyfriend. (My boyfriend is the first and only one who ever saw me and touched me that way.) I panicked. I pushed him away, telling to get off of me, crying, almost yelling, I couldn't see my beautiful boy there, and it hurted so much. I beggined to pull my own hair, scratch my own legs and punch my own face. But my boyfriend was there. He huged me, and for the first time, I felt uncomfortable with him because I couldn't tell who he really was. I stayed in that mood for like 2 weeks in july, and now it started again. Please, someone help me. Kind words, but mostly advices are needed

Im a 22F i have struggled with ocd probably all my life but it really came to a head when i was 15 I had a severe panic attack surronding the potential of being lesbian or asexual. As a young child i did experiment with some of my friends and remembering feeling arousal. At the age of around 7 i started watching corn, mainly lesbian corn i guess i found it more arousing (This makes me very anxious would watch twerking or provocative stuff. Although from memory i only had crushes on boys. I still continued to watch corn changing types and so forth. When i got a bit older i became really shy and scared of boys i remember being 13 and this boy liked me and wanted to be my boyfriend i panicked and cried. I would panic for days after my first kiss worrying about people knowing or i was bad etc. I felt as though i would find guys attractive but wouldnt think “ I want them to rip my clothes off” i would think they are hot or nice to look at and may feel nice inside. Around the age of 13 i saw this girl at a cheer comp who i thought was stunning i became obsessed with her wanting to be her friend and even starting cheer at the gym i dont believe i wanted to be intimate with her but i cant really remember all i know is i started to by clothes i saw her wearing and wanting to be like possibly thought about a kiss but i cant remember and if i did i dont remember me thinking much about it at the time. Then when i hit around 15 it all came to ahead ending with me in the hospital from the sheer panic of being a lesbian bi or asexual. I had gotten over that theme but still felt my attraction was warped to some degree, and continuing porn use. i then enetered my first relationship and i liked him at the start but sex was an issue i felt excited but not satisfied due to manu reasons including contamination and checking if i felt attracted or aroused enough. Currently going through another episode of this and i really would like some help, advice and i know reassurance is not great but if anyone has experienced something similar. I cant picture myself in a relationship with a woman and i dont think im attracted to any women in real life but i also worry that im not attracted to boys either i just feel like my childhood is a stem for my anxiety with this theme Sorry for the long post

Okay, I am going insane at this point. I've been in and out of hospital with my contamination stuff and made huge progress in ERP, so I decided to tackle a bag of "contaminated clothes" from months ago when I went to my endocrinologist and something made my eyes and skin and inside of my mouth etc. itch and BURN, I mean to the point of coughing up blood and bloodclots coming out of my nose, and everything felt very dried up (at the time I thought it was residual acid from medical test I was supposed to undergo and couldn't because of the OCD). When I washed myself and rinsed my mouth, it would stop, but whenever I'd come close to the clothes I was wearing that day, it'd start again. I have since washed them in a washing machine, but not separately, I did a whole load trying to convince myself it would be fine. It wasn't though, the whole batch of clothes now does this to me, even a towel I put near it. But it doesn't make any SENSE, it was washed?? Twice now and it still won't go? Can OCD do stuff like this? I used the towel to dry myself and my hair after shower and have been waking up the whole night unable to breathe with dried up sinuses and inside of my mouth. Can it do this?? I've never had this happen to me before and I feel crazy beyond recognition from it.

So my bf and I did the do tonight (it’s been a while I couldn’t keep my hands off him) but for some reason when we went to actually have sex I was not super wet like I used to be/it hurt when there was penetration. But I wanted it so bad. Like I know I do. I think maybe I’m in my head worrying it’ll hurt so it ends up hurting lol. Idk how to let my body relax it’s been kinda wonky since OCD started and also I’m on birth control (nexplanon, since last October, idk if that changes much tbh.) How do I let myself relax?? We use lube usually but didn’t today cuz it was a quickie Also how do I know if I’m actually enjoying sex with my partner and not just tolerating it? I feel like I’m thinking that instead of actually being there having sex with him. It’s kinda the crux of my ROCD and soocd “if you don’t enjoy it/don’t feel butterflies, you’re gay and don’t love him” sums it up. But it feels great, I feel good. I feel loved and save and turned on when I’m with him and afterwards (when he’s not rushing to leave like today lol) we stay and cuddle and I just feel.. good. Not cuz I did smthn for him but cuz it felt good for me cuz I am with someone who genuinely loves me and cares if I enjoy things yknow? I do love doing things for him but he also makes sure I get my fun too lol. I want to touch him. I want to initiate. Very clearly. Not gay. I’m worried my lack of butterflies during sex means smthn idk why. Help🥲✌️

Dear whoever is reading this 💌, Hey I am 20, I do have OCD but this is something different and this is what I’m sharing to you for a better response. Im overweight, a average student and not doing much in life. Has no trustable friends, has no hobbies, has no family support. My problem is I feel like im stuck in some sort of loop. What loop? I’ll explain I lost weight some 10 kgs and here i am on the edge to gain that again. I should have kept losing weight. And I wouldn’t be fat anymore. I could have studied more and got into best college here i am doing a degree with no importance. I’m giving another exam which ik will change my life but here I am doing absolutely nothing.. This is the loop I start working with these I give up again i start i give up.. Now im so so so burned out of all of this i feel numb i dont feel like doing anything. People trust?? Forget about that I lost my own trust. I dont trust myself. I dont have confidence. I don’t know ik i have things on my table sorted but only thing is im scared of starting it again and failing. Im tired of surviving into fat body like this. Im tired of people taunting me. I feel like a failure and Neither I have strength anymore to start again.. Im 100% sure like I’ll fail again. I feel I failed as a person too because no one likes me. People who know me love me I have always disappointed. I am an coward with no self respect.. Thankyou for reading so much 🫂

heyyyy everyone, has anyone had any weird experiences with lexapro? quick back story, had really bad health anxiety paired with ocd compulsions and other things not relevant to this discussion, got fluvoxamine, could never go past 50mg without increased anxiety and derealization/depersonalization... eventually got off and got on lexapro, started with 5 mg, went to 10 mg, just a few days ago went to 15 mg because i felt as if my health compulsions and fears were making a comeback. i believe im on day 3 of 15 mg lexapro and i feel as if im spiraling a tad bit, nothing crazy/anything i havent experienced before... but in my post work shower i felt feverish almost... which is a trigger for me, my mind automatically thinks cancer. i tried resisting the thoughts to google my symptoms (literally just feeling feverish) and took my temp, and took my temp again.... and again.... and again.... (tale as old as time lol) each time it was in normal range... but i still feel weird. brain fog, dissociating, just all around weird vibe and heightened senses of my body and such. could this be because of the lexapro? idk. lowkey thinking i was bound for an ocd relapse because i was doing so good the majority of this year, erp went great, medications were finally working, but now i feel like its all coming back :(, any advice?

I have been seeking reassurance from other coworkers (the ones I trust) about me quitting my job. The job is quitting is so toxic it’s like you can’t run away from it. I have made comments about how I want to seek other careers and my manager makes nothing but negative comments. I put in my application to work as a cna in the nursing home months ago and I was talking to a lady who works at the nursing home and she was talking to me about cna classes and then my manager asks what we were talking about and I said “I was telling her about me putting my application in” and then here comes negativity out of the managers mouth. Out of no where I get a text on a Wednesday morning asking if I was still interested in cna class and I replied with yes ma’am. The women doesn’t text me back so I gave it a day or 2 and then I texted her back asking when the classes start and that same day she asked if I can come for an interview and I told her I couldn’t cause I’m at work so she asked if I can Monday morning (today I went and the interview was amazing). I had to let my manager know like hey I have an interview for another job,she asks “where” I said at the nursing home. She rolls her eyes and says “I don’t think your going to like it” and then two more people butt in the conversation with they’re opinions. Im anxious and feel horrible because this is alll of a sudden and I couldn’t put in two weeks notice. I’ve been wanting to quit for so long and figure out what career I want. My cousin who is a manager also said “I don’t think your going to like it”. Why is it so hard for people to just be kind. I have a few people who were kind and happy for me. I know I’m grown and not once do I expect the next job to not have any negativity. But I keep overthinking what if I made a really bad choice?? I’m so excited for what’s next for me I’m life. I’m only 22 trying to figure life out you know. The job I’m quitting from they are so negative about everyone and talk so bad about people I just don’t get it! There’s so much more I can say but it’s too much to put on here so I will let it all rest in Gods hand.

I am spiralling into a really bad depression and I have no idea how to get out of it, what are some tips and self care tips for those of you that have depression with your OCD use to help shift your perspective or got you out of that dark place? It's starting to get really dark in my mind like someone is slowly turning the lights off and I don't know what to do. I'm in tears as I write this so please be kind.

i touched someone else’s phone when they handed it to me to add myself to a class group chat and i feel SO gross… i can’t stop thinking about where they and their phone have been and how nasty it probably is. i can’t wash my hands until i get home, i feel so sick

Hi. I deal with pocd (but I am not diagnosed cuz I can't afford therpay) and I think it's ocd. It begun over a year back and initially it was about "what if I become a p" and then eventually it became "what if I am already a p" and then eventually I had this phase of 4-6ish months where my ocd almost vanished to the point where I was not even getting triggered by stuff. And then I suddenly had this huge SO OCD bout for 2 ish weeks last month where I lost my mind about what if I am a lesbian (I identify as a bi woman ) but then eventually I just accepted that I am a lesbian and felt like a lesbian for a while and then I am again back to bi. So basically I completely accepted the uncertainty and hence got over it easily. But I cannot do that pocd. Ew. Idk what to do. And this so ocd bout caused the pocd to return and rn my brain is full on "see u turned out to accept lesbianism so u definitely wanna accept being a p" and like its also "what if I am already a p, and subconsciously accepted it and am pretending to have ocd cuz what if I am in extreme denial?" And like idk what to do. I am worried posting this too cuz I am afraid what if somebody reading this misunderstands and thinks I am actually a p. Another thing I deal with is "am i even performing compulsions?" Cuz I mainly confess to my bestie and chatgpt(I stopped with chatgpt cuz I am scared about privacy issues) and research stuff about pocd to gain reassurance. And occasionally ruminate for checking but it doesn't interfere with my life. Bcz of this I *feel* like I don't perform enough compulsions and not performing compulsions essentially means it's not ocd. I genuinely get scared about what if it's pocd or denial. Or what if I am lying and manipulating ppl to think it's ocd and what if I am just faking the anxitey. Sometimes my thoughts don't give anxiety and later on that absence of anxiety worries me a lot cuz my brain is like "see u didn't get anxiety so u liked that thought. Hence u are a p" and idk what to do. Can someone please help me please. I don't wanna be a p. Another compulsion I do is saying "I don't wanna be a p" or "I am not a p" 5 times in sets of 5. I started this compulsion voluntarily when I read somewhere that counting is a compulsion and I wanted to prove to myself "see it's ocd" and now I do sort of as a habit to confirm the same. And this scares me too cuz doesn't that mean this is a fake compulsion??? And what If it's not ocd.

I hope this means I can be seen as a source of support for others struggling/doing the work, if nothing more than to just be comforting and empathetic. ♥️

Hello NOCD community! Do yall ever get really bad thoughts before going to bed? Like really old ones that come out of nowhere and then you start to spiral (feelings of dread and anxiety)? Lately I’ve been having a hard sleeping like my brain simply won’t let me rest! Random thoughts will pop up in my head, lately more how people perceive me thoughts like “what if all these people hate me or think I’m a bad person? What if I did something in my past that makes people think I’m weird/disgusting?” I know I’m a very nice and kind person but I can’t seem to shake these thoughts off. Any words of advice when trying to sleep or tools that you use before you hit the hay?

UPDATE: I couldnt do it... i couldnt stop posting... this situation is too triggering and thinking about the worst possible outcome scares me... in the past, I have been catfished by a man pretending to be a woman, had a minor on a dating app who lied about her age and i unknowingly flirted with her because I assumed she was 18+ and her bio said so, and sent an 18+ pic to a "woman" online who now I suspect of being a catfish... this is the reason why I'm so scared of whether or not I unknowingly inappropriately chatted with a minor without knowing... it genuinely scares me... Its making me think that I unknowingly inappropriately chatted with a minor in the past without knowing and it genuinely triggers me... I have tried to go back through most 18+ online interactions ive had with women online to make sure they didnt lie or they confirmed their age... i have two situations on discord that trigger me that ive posted about in the past... and a couple have deleted their discords so thats triggering me really bad... most who deleted their discords were verified but still... why delete your discord, you know...? for context i was on 18+ explicit discord servers meant for sex that you cant just join regularly on iPhone due to it being for adults only... Ive also been to a website dedicated to adult 18+ literature... they also have an 18+ chat room where you can talk to other users... i know ive made stupid mistakes going on here... i wont deny that... and now im paying for it with the uncertainty... veterans of the site, who have been on there for over 9 years, have told me that the chances of a minor lying about their age and coming onto the chat portion of the website are rare... but it still triggers me all the same... Im scared of someone one day in the future accusing me of doing horrible things like unknowingly inappropriately messaging minors, or have my worst fears of unknowingly explicitly messaging a minor confirmed to have happened and I didnt know about it... (edited)

Insurance isn’t covered. I’m devastated, but I plan to use NOCD for community support.

I basically can’t stop thinking about the false memories and I’ve been thinking about them non-stop since I’ve woken up today. I keep picturing the images / the false memory and I focus and fixate on the images and they feel so so real and realistic and when I think of them I get a feeling of “clarity” and a genuine sense of knowing and belief that deep down I know these memories are true and have happened and that I’m just in denial and lying to myself and you by saying that they’re false memories when in actuality I know they’re real which is also really frustrating and makes me feel uncomfortable. On top of that as I’m writing this message my stomach won’t stop turning and it really hurts and I just want to cry and my brain says that I’m experiencing these physical feelings because I know I am lying and just in denial and that these physical symptoms are proof that I am lying and just in denial and I just don’t know what to do or how to calm down. I really don’t want these memories to be true and I want them to be false more than anything in the world and I am not lying when I say I don’t know whether or not they’re real and I’m not lying or pretending they’re false memories but the more I say that to myself the more it feels like a lie and I’m just terrified at the thought and idea of them being even 1% true because why wouldn’t they be? Is it really possible to fabricate entire memories or doing sexual things to and with another person that are that detailed and realistic :/ My brain says things will only get better once I admit to the false memories and stop lying to myself and stop being in denial and stop using false memory ocd as an excuse and just admit to them because I know deep down I have done them and that they’re true which is why I feel a deep sense of clarity about them and that I am just continuing to lie to myself, to my girlfriend, to my therapist and to my family when I say I don’t know whether I have done anything sexual to or with this person because deep down I know I have I just don’t want to admit it so I’m continuing to be in this heavy state and cycle of denial because I don’t want to accept what I have done. I just want this to end. I just want confirmation that I have never done anything sexual to or with this person and that these memories are entirely fabricated by my ocd and have no basis in reality but I don’t even think that’s possible. I’m so done.

Before i had Soocd i wasnt aware of what kind of men i like(im a girl) After it i got attached to specific type of men as if i found my type in men.. Many say their prespective and types got ruined due to OCD But mine seems to be different Is it ocd or am i pretending to have a type

I was self pleasuring and as I was climaxing already my sister popped into my head and I indulged in it for a second. Then it happened again later where I was already climaxing and jt made me climax harder. And often when I have intrusive thoughts during the actual process, the taboo stuff will start to make the sounds build up and I’ll stop bc I don’t want to get off to it even tho I’m tempted to chase it. But sometimes I’ll let the taboo stuff build it up and when I climax I ONLY focus on the feeling not the thought so it doesn’t count as me getting off to it, but idk if it does or not. Point is, I need HELP!

For awhile, I didn’t notice that I had cancel culture OCD, as I thought it was normal for people with OCD to feel an abnormal fear of being hated or perceived as a bad person. However, I seemed to blindly miss the huge clues that lead to this fact, which is, I am horrified that one might make a “beware” and or “cancel/exposed post” about me, to the point where I will not publish art for it. Because I want others to see me as a good human being and to be forgiven me for my horrible past, that I felt great regret over. though, through my research of exposed videos (of people doing the slightly same as me), they are not very forgiving, even if you were 16 years old, 15 years old, 13 years old, doesn’t matter. The internet makes it apparent that nothing you can do can make anyone forgive you or make you forget your mistakes. And this led me to believe I had to make sure I could be redeemed in every single real event ocd I had about my past. Because I felt that if I did something wrong, then I would never see the light of day again, truth is, I have done things that were wrong, but were all humans, but, the internet never agrees. Ive seen a video speaking about a 14 year old who drew bad stuff but wasn’t forgiven because….they just weren’t, even thought theyre a child? Please tell me I don’t stand alone on this.