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the NOCD Community

How do you guys connect with your significant others without scaring them about your ocd? I want to be open but it's hard to know what is too much... thanks

Feeling like everything is real right now?

Is there anyone who suffers from real event ocd ? I can’t find any help. I’m desperate. I’m in a really hard place right now. Anyone who can help please?

Everytime something I see or hear I’ll feel something down there and I don’t know why and like I won’t rly freak out much about it which is making me terrified now that like what if those feelings are true? Idk man I hate this :( I don’t wanna be a terrible person and I’m scared I’m disgusting. And my paranoia is getting to me like my friend hasn’t been speaking to me lately and it’s like I’m scared it’s bc of things I’ve said. Idk.

OCD and childhood trauma. Does anyone else have a formulation like this one. I. Currently seeing a therapist but it's focused prodominatly on childhood trauma I experienced. (in short. Sexual abuse) I and my therapist believe that thiz trauma has left me with inncurate belief that there is something fundamentally sinful or sordid about my sexuality due to the guilt and shame I took from these experiences, and a lot of the therapy is do used on challenging that belief a recognising I was a victim and a child, not a perperteator.. I believe that this also informs and is the cause for a lot of my harm OCD and pocd symptoms.... My therapist is a trauma therapist however and doesn't know much about OCD, although she says it seems to fit. I guess whata hard Is I don't know where my trauma starts and my OCD finishes and it generally makes the whole thing a lot less straight forward. Like is it even OCD or is it just my trauma has made me into a potentially sick and dangerous and twisted individual (this is where my OCD started I think because I read an article that victims of sexual abuse sometimes go in to abuse) and then I was like... Oh god what if that ends up being me', and the fear never went away until it became an obsession and I at times haven't left he house in fear I'm dangerous and spent hours and hours a day checking every thought and emotion and action for evidence. I guess yeah so.. I don't know what's trauma and whats OCD and where to get those answers and if making a disnction is even useful, if it's common for these to overlap, and how to help it cos treatment for each is very different. Hope that makes sense... Feeling a bit vulnerable now.

I need advice from anyone dealing with any sort of existential OCD. How do you get over the depressing feelings from your thoughts? My thoughts feel unbearable at times and I can't figure out how to cope. I've started ERP, but my mood gets so low sometimes because of these thoughts I feel like I can't handle it. To be more specific, my intrusive thoughts are from Andy Weir's story The Egg.

I genuinely feel like people with ocd have a higher iq are more intelligent interesting and creative than most people, if only we can use it to own advantage.. #superpower #positivity

Hello fellow fighters! I had managed OCD after a long struggle with variable levels of the disorder. I had been through Scrupulosity(religious OCD) which was the 2nd them in my case. By the time, the third theme was coming, I went for psychotherapy. Mindfulness and professional help helped me a lot. Other than that, directing my attention towards productive activities like programming and studying helped me a lot. I have a question: I have improved a lot in the past 1 year. I still sometimes involve in checking ( I think one cannot 100% eliminate this). This causes me to slow down in study particularly in subjects like mathematics. I find it really hard to go through long calculations. From what I have read, I believe it's more about the lack of confidence in my memory. Also, I have issues in remembering long instructions. Academically, I am doing well but my problem solving skills have declined in the last few years . So, now I am working on these areas. I think practicing without checking might help. I practice mindfulness meditation on a daily basis and it has transformed my life. It has helped with concentration too. This has to do a lot with working memory and checking. Anybody could throw some light on this and give some advice please. In short, Please give some advice on 1. improving working memory 2. Avoiding checking in general and in calculations/steps. I start to get anxiety (something is wrong) while solving. Other than that, I have trouble in things like filling forms, or situations when we have to check something.

Please can someone keep me company or listen to me? I'm just extremely distressed :(

What have been some positive aspects you’ve recognized or encountered while having OCD? After my onset it helped me to become a more compassionate person toward others, more open minded, and also helped to strengthen my faith.

My ocd theme is currently centered around the extreme fear of my boyfriend or a loved one dying ?

How the fuck do people NOT worry all day everyday about being dumped? I feel I’ve gotta do something to stop him ever leaving me 24/7 I feel it has to be to myself, like break a bone or something so he cares more? Or have something bad happen to me that won’t kill me or anything but like make him scared HE will lose ME? I don’t understand how it’s possible people simply, *dont* fear abandonment? To me that’s absolutely insane. If he leaves me I feel I have no options other than hope I die in my sleep too

I feel like I need something bad (but not life threatening or permanently altering) needs to happen to me, to get people to start caring about me and loving me the way I want and need? I feel like everyone needs to have some kind of like wake up call or something I really don’t feel I have any value and that’s the only way I will ever get it if there’s risk to me

Do any of you have experience with Buspar? And if so do it work for you?

I’m panicking so hard over my life My job is a dead end job I HATED from day one I wanted to leave on my lunch hour and my ex wouldn’t have been happy so I stayed. Been here four years now and he threw me out with no warning after ten years but I’m still stuck here. Ive been bullied there by my manager for a year, used my mental illness against me and I have been feeling trapped and isolated. When I apply for new jobs. I hear nothing. I feel powerless and nothing is in my control. I can’t leave because I won’t have money and I can’t work out what to do with my creativity. Everyone reminds me constantly I’m wasted at a job I already despise so it makes me spiral into “oh god I’ll never make my life worth anything” Also My ocd is wrecking me My anxiety in general is wrecking me I feel low I think I may also have undiagnosed bpd My partner’s mother is ill will cancer and he’s shutting me out, triggering my abandonment fears I feel no security or direction in my life at all. I feel I’m on shaky ground 24/7 and I have no control over anything Panic please please say someone else feels this way I feel a complete failure and disappointment running out of time

I’m super anxious because my hocd is focused on one girl now and whenever she stands super close to me or touches me I get this weird anxious feeling and o find myself leaning away from her. I’m scared that it’s really actual feelings because it’s just one person.

I have bad OCD pertaining to sexual intrusive thoughts in many sub categories. But the thing is is I am just a regular straight male. Nothing more nothing less. I hate these thoughts and they dominate my life 24/7 and everything is a trigger.... Everything everything. Seriously, literally everything. Whenever I get "triggered" (I hate that word) my heart skips a beat and I freak out and mentally start spiraling out of control with a single episode that can last anwhere from minutes to literal months of 24/7 hell. I'm not triggered by seeing, hearing, or the touch of women as I actually like them and view that as normal healthy behavior. But the other stuff, nope. Don't like it. Never have and never will. And its literally because my brain says "don't think that" so it then in turn says some very very gross, scary, and undesirable thinga then my body gets triggered. Then that "Dont think that" turns into "Dont look, dont stare gross!!!" And other stuff along those lines. And soon everything gets me. But I know who I am and I'm not these things and dont like this stuff!!! At all! Nope! Never!! I go to therapy, practiced mindfulness, etc which honestly makes stuff worse because I dont want to let these thoughts flow and "not judge them". I understand the concept of the more you fight and resist thoughts the more the recur, but I'm also NOT okay with being okay with those thoughts. And I hate when people tell me that crap. Its not a matter of me not wanting to freak out, these are gross thoughts and considering they're sexual thoughts, I'm not okay with them and I dont want to be okay with them. Everything and everybody except women are a trigger and I DO NOT like this. These are not my desires or fantasies or wants. These thoughts are gross and bad and even if they weren't considered bad to some, they still are me. I just want to get out of this hell and become the real me again that doesnt think this garbage at all and doesnt freak out and label myself bad and gross things due to the fact that I have thought them... even though I am not those things! Then I can't get out of this unhealthy cycle and it is deterioating my personality, self esteem, and makes me question everything that I dont actually have to question or wonder about because Im already secure about it and know the answer. Then everything in every part of life and my head gets fucked up along with the other OCD topics and I literally feel panicky, crazy, and psychotic just stirring up new fucked up things to freak out on usually but not having some relation to the above topic. I just want to be me again! The real me. The confident, noncrazy feeling, funny, social, nondepressed, non crippled by anxiety, masculine, honest, hard working, not perverted, and well I still am straight like always but not think these gross thoughts anymore. I just want to live my life, be happy, be a good person without having to think about it, have good friends, good women, make good music, have a good career, be close to God, and die peacefully and happily. That's all I want! So that leads to my question: Healthy or unhealthy, advised to do by professionals or not, how do you handle unexpected visual, audible, and mental triggers when it comes to sexually instrusive thoughts and topics? And what effectiveness does it have on you and how long do those effects last?

Do any other women here find themselves sexually aroused by images of other women? I get aroused by descriptions of females being sexually used in erotica and I’m afraid that’s evidence. I also love boobs, but mostly my own and what my boyfriend is capable of doing with them. I’m confused and tired and I need help. Anyone please

I really can’t tell if this is ocd anymore. Like I don’t even get other ocd themes just sexual ones and they haunt me. I get seriously turned on by things that I don’t want to be and then I think that’s really just me not ocd. :(

I don’t know what the point in my existence is anymore I don’t feel secure I don’t feel loved I don’t know where o stand with my partner cuz he keeps pushing me Away then pulling me back I love him and I’m so confused why I’m not receiving the same level of certainty I always give him I’m currently crying at work cuz two girls are engaged and know they aren’t gonna be abandoned. One girl just said she’s going on a date with her fiancé while I’ve just been told he needs space and for me to go back to my own place, a few days after he asked me to fucking move in ALL I WANT IS LOVE AND SECURITY WHY DONT I FUCKING DESERVE IT WHEN EVERYONE WLSE GETS IT