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the NOCD Community

I’m straight but when I watch women twerk I get anxious and sometimes makes me think I’m having some kind of feeling is this normal it always makes me question my sexuality I’m only into boys

Does anyone with ROCD, POCD and Sexual Orientation OCD (HOCD) ever fear they will never be in a stable marriage or a relationship in general due to their fears or because their OCD may ruin it? My biggest fear is that I will never be in a stable, committed or a normal relationship due to this horrible disorder.

My OCD has massively spiked from last weekend to tonight. I usually can pinpoint why. Tiredness, not feeling well, stressed, dreaming (out of my control); these are all wonderful times for OCD to attack because you're already feeling crappy and less on guard, which makes it easier to flare up. However, I have zero clue why it's so bad currently. I'm not stressed, not tired, not not feeling well. And it's not a little flare where it's picking on just one thing. It's picking on the ENTIRE spectrum of sexuality: incest, beastiality, pedophilia, and homosexuality. It's horrible. I seriously want to cry and feel like I'm suffocating. I can't listen to music, go places, really do anything without it taking something and trying to twist it. Like driving in the car with my mom and maybe a more sexual song comes on on the radio: Oh you're listening to a sexual song with your mom. That's weird. That means something! You're into your mom! Cuddling my dogs and just feeling loved: Oh you're too close to your dogs. You're into them. You're sick. Oh you really like your trainer cause she's super nice and funny: You know a good deal of female trainers are gay right? You were wondering if she was gay or bi. Why were you wondering? Cause you're gay and you like her. Like seriously NONSTOP. I can't even watch tv and see a character that's gay or a celebrity who is gay and not start freaking out. I have absolutely nothing against the LGBTQ community. It's just I don't want it or like it for myself. But here I am freaking out. Then you have random physical arousal that goes with all that crap, and it just makes it all worse. There are seriously no therapists where I'm from who understand and properly treat OCD. It's all reassurance based. And then there's all these places I hear about that sound great and like they really get OCD. Think they offer online/on the phone therapy for my state? lol NO. Like how are you supposed to feel any better feeling like no one can help you? I know there are self guided therapy books. But I'm terrified. Petrified. I need a professional to help me get over that first hurdle. Can anyone relate?): Also, does anyone get triggered by seeing the posts on here? If there's even anything that slightly mentions sexuality on here that someone is having trouble with, my OCD latches onto that and turns it into a new attack for me. That's why I've always been hesitant to join OCD support groups. Because I KNOW my OCD will see someone's own OCD issues and latch onto them to further attack me. It SUCKS.

Has anyone who suffers from HOCD feel they have lost that genuine sexual and emotional attraction towards the opposite sex? Or just constant confusion?

Anyone else feel the need to confess to their thoughts to their partners? I burden my bf a lot in this way, but I feel like I'm dishonest or guilty if I don't. He's very understanding but he can only take so much.

How do you deal/ try to stop mental compulsions? Mine seem so involuntary it’s like I can’t stop myself from doing them

has anyone have any experience with any of the following drugs : plz comment :  fluoxetine (Prozac),  fluvoxamine (Luvox),  paroxetine (Paxil),  citalopram (Celexa),  escitalopram (Lexapro), sertraline (Zoloft). clomipramine

When i say to myself I’m straight or I’m heterosexual, i get slight anxiety in my stomach. It feels like I’m lying to myself although I’ve been straight my entire life.

Studies suggest that OCD is heritable. How do you deal with the fact, you might be responsible for your children getting it? ?

Im so struggling right now, any Catholic here who can give me an advice? Im Catholic planning to get married to my Muslim boyfriend in summer. We are both pretty religious, but respectful of each other's religion. We want to do both ceremonies, the catholic and the muslim one, but church law says we cannot add another ceremony to the catholic one. I talked to various priests and even one lady inquired with a bishop for me and ALL of them said they dont see a problem because the muslim wedding is not really a religious ceremony and more of a contract thing. But a friend of mine asked a priest she knows to get in contact with church lawyers to ask them so that we can be sure, and im so scared that they wont say no and that my head will take it as a sign and I will start to worry again whether its ok to get married ... I know it makes no sense to worry about something I dont know will happen or not, but I cant seem to get it out of my head since yesterday and im always on the verge of crying... I dont want to do something thats against the church, but I couldnt stand to break off this relationship either and Im so so scared. I have moments where I feel in my heart that its the right thing to do to get married but one little thing and I get scared again that Im going against God's will...

I always think about one person . Even I try to stop it , it still remains. Iam fucked up with it.I think it's my urge for fatherlylove that made me an ocd sufferer. He is my uncle. He is caring me ,but i always doubt the relationship with thoughts like 'He don't loves me ' , 'Iam no one to him' .etc ..And i also get aroused sometimes when he is with me. hocd is another problem i suffer....I always try not to get aroused and i feel very bad for that. He cares me like a child. What my body and mind is doing? He knows i suffer from these things, he always say to me "Be more confident.it's time to study, do that". But for me that wasn't enough.... I don't know what to do with myself there's no one who could understand me. Feels like Iam sinking down...

Best medication for OCD primarily obsessive thoughts?

My therapist suggested that I keep a rubber band on my wrist and anytime I want to do a compulsion to snap it against my wrist or say stop. I decided I wanted to try it for when I found myself dwelling on memories and mistakes ocd brings up to try to give me ‘proof’ I’m horrible. Anyone else tried this?

OCD is fake! And a trickster, but all of its tricks are empty fears that hold no sway over your life! It will try with all of its might to convince you otherwise, but it is a liar, plain and simple. I’ve discovered that leaning into the fear, letting it play out, and breathing through attacks is extremely therapeutic. When you let the fear play over and over and over, the anxiety eventually subsides. NOTHING LAST FOREVER! Becoming aware to OCD and the way it feels and makes you feel is the key to overcoming it. Sure, it’ll always be lingering around, but it’s voice becomes a whisper when you recognize OCD hidden behind the mask of fear. And then you can begin to catch OCD before it grows. You can remind yourself of its lies, falseness, and absolute absurdity. IT HAS NEVER BEEN REAL, IT WILL NEVER BE REAL. Worry when there is something to worry about, physically and present in this world. Otherwise, accept the thoughts, catch OCD in disguise, and never be afraid! It is a liar, and it will never be right! Ever!

I’m in turmoil trying to figure out if I’m a homosexual. I keep thinking I’m homosexual but never believed that I was until very recently and have had multiple heterosexual relationships. I cannot tell what is real and what is not anymore and I’m losing my mind. I have no idea of whether I am heterosexual, homosexual or bi-sexual? I can accept being bi-sexual as it means the relationships that I had were not fake or simply a cover up. However my counsellor has told me that I’ve more than likely repressed all my homosexuality and used my relationships as a cover. Has anyone had serious trouble with their sexuality and can you please help? This is horrible

!! TW COCD RANT !! my family and i are going away for holiday in about two weeks and i can’t stop thinking about it ,, all i can think about is lying on the used hotel beds covered in bacteria and the bugs surrounding the area - we’re going to a resort and my parents really want me to swim but i literally can’t ! when i imagine the pool i think of all the people who have swam in it and all their unclothed feet covering every inch of space available. i’m going to hopefully bring a sleeping bag from home and stay in that the entire time - we also have to travel on a plane which is even worse :( just thinking about sharing the air with all those strangers makes me want to cry :’((( also we aren’t making food in the resort so we have to go to restaurants to eat which i really can’t handle bc of the shared cutlery. i’m hopefully going to bring stuff from home to prevent panic but i’m afraid that this trip will totally ruin those safe items for me. sorry to write this paragraph but it would really help if u had anything to say which might help my situation in the slightest !!!

Need advice! My roommate and I were both pre-med. then I changed to pre-dent and had internships and worked hard for it and now she changed to pre-dent too. I used to get so jealous because she gets like perfect As and I’m a As and Bs student and I feel like if a dental school was looking at the two of us they would pick her over me any day. I think about it a lot and it makes me feel bad because I try really hard to get as good grades but for her it comes naturally and I don’t really get it. I compare myself with her and make myself feel bad about myself all the time. Has anyone experienced a similar situation? Can anyone give me any advice?

I just had a moment of big panic because I keep having obsessions about reality and how is it possible that I’m able to perceive it. You know when you say a word out loud way too many times, and it starts losing its meaning and sounds weird? Same thing happens to me with reality. Sometimes it gets so intense, it makes me wanna vomit or feel like I’ll faint. I just don’t understand existence and everything feels so weird. I can’t get over it. This is my worst obsession :(

My friend is going through a break up right now and I’m trying really hard to be there for her but it’s completely triggering my ocd ? I keep thinking about breaking up with my bf now even though there is ZERO reason to ??

I’m afraid to date with this disorder. I got diagnosed about 2 months ago. I’m on medications and doing erp. I feel like the whole subject is so taboo I have a hard time talking to my own mother about it. I’ve told my best friend but I don’t know how to talk to someone “new” about this. It’s so shameful I cry almost every day. I never had to deal with this disorder in previous relationships. I’ve been out of my previous relationship for about 8 months. The Pocd became unbearable about 5 or so months ago. I’ve been asked out on dates but I’m completely afraid of being triggered and talking about it. Any advice?