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the NOCD Community

I'm convinced I have borderline personality disorder, I think it's an OCD thing and now I'm watching videos on BPD which my therapist told me not to do so now I feel like a failure. By the way every couple of weeks or months I see some symptoms I have in common with mental problems and then start researching and taking online tests. I can't have so many mental illnesses can I? It must just be OCD playing games with me.

((TW: POCD)) I matched with someone on tinder who’s 18 and I’m having serious anxiety about it because they just turned 18 last Saturday and I’m about to turn 22. I know it’s legal and I shouldn’t be worrying but it does make me uncomfy. I’ve had people lie about their age to try and talk to me years ago and it makes me feel really fucking gross even though I blocked them immediately. I’m so against talking to minors it’s insane.

One of my themes of OCD is POCD and I’m always obsessing about how someone becomes a pedo, were they born with it (and if they were born with it then what exactly caused them to be that way, is it genetic, is it due to childhood abuse/neglect? My OCD tries to constantly rationalize how they happen to have those sort of genuine attractions… and it starts to scare me that there isn’t an answer as to how people develop those attractions

Wow, image ocd is hitting me hard. And it doesnt help that all the woman i’m asking out are rejecting me. I feel so ugly and depressed. And i never saw myself as being ugly. And i keep making fake scenarios in my head of me being rejected or shamed by woman and cant help but feel frustrated as if it actually happened. And dont get me started on rumination. I keep ruminating about whats wrong with my image? Is it my face? My weight? My clothes? UGH, woman nowadays are so shallow

Is it possible to have a theme not bother you as much anymore or if not at all? And is it true that OCD is worse when you’re really stressed? I’m currently under a lot of stress and have suicide OCD. But even when I’m not necessarily feeling so stressed it still bothers me. I just don’t know how I’m supposed to live and enjoy my life when my brain is constantly thinking about suicide when I don’t want to die.. I’m so scared and just feeling somewhat doomed that this obsession is gonna take over me.. I just need some hope

When and how did you first discover you may have OCD? I'm beginning to think OCD is one of the most understudied, misunderstood mental health issues ever. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder about 6 years ago after I started suffering from panic attacks, but only just recently discovered my condition could be much more specific than that. I've been suffering from intrusive thoughts and complusions since I was a teenager with a variety of themes. And honestly this app and amazing community has opened my eyes to it. I'm curious if anyone else has had an experience like mine where they were just thrown into the general diagnosis category of just having anxiety and/or depression and is only just now coming to terms with having OCD? What has been your experience with the therapists on this app? I'm using another popular, pricey app for talk therapy at the moment, but so far 4 therapists have ghosted me on it so my confidence is feeling pretty shot. Has talk therapy and working with a therapist on here been successful for you?

Is it normal to become emotional during your sessions? I have my first session tomorrow and I'm worried I'll be crying the entire time.

Anyone here who takes medication and does it help

My daughter who has religious and contamination ocd is asking to be excused from a a family vacation because she will not be able to eat or sleep or do anything. Nor will she be able to sleep in her bed when we return. Should I let her stay with grandma while the rest of the family goes on the trip? Should I make her go with us even though she will be miserable and make her siblings miserable through her behavior? Such a difficult decision! She is 14 years old and refuses to actively participate in therapy. She said she like her life the way it is and is fine with the restrictions she has placed on herself. My thinking is that if she goes and sees how much fun everyone is having she might start to realize she has a problem and cooperate more with treatment. Any suggestions are greatly appreciate! Thank you!

PMS and OCD SUCKS TOGETHER. I’ve been doing so well since getting my treatment here on NOCD. I feel like I’m literally on the road to recovery. However, when I’m pmsing/on my period, it just likes to try and get the best of me. I’m still doing my doing my ERP therapies, but my hormones get all out of wack and the OCD loves to try to sneak in again. 😞

This is half a vent session, half me asking for advice but: My OCD symptoms started on april 2020, one month after the pandemic. that has led me to constantly question whether it’s OCD or anxiety and of course i can’t really diagnose myself but it behaves very differently from anxiety. i’ve also been doing research and reading about OCD for over a year and i honestly honestly think i have OCD because i fit basically all the symptoms? anyways, I finally brought it up to my therapist a few appointments ago and i felt like they kind of dismissed me? not sure if that’s normal. they told me it’s could be because of heightened anxiety and to practice “thought stopping”. that has made me feel sooo bad about myself because i start spiraling and believing my intrusive thoughts MUST be true because of what they said, and because it makes me feel like I’m just using the OCD label for “attention”. i’m not sure if i should bring it up again in a future appointment? or maybe find a new therapist? or maybe I don’t have OCD at all? I don’t know what to do

I wanted to ask if there are some pocd stories I can read somewhere? I want to see if I can relate to others.

So I’ve been a bit stressed on top of my regular ocd (Hocd, mild rocd). My libido seems to just be worse than ever and I never want to do anything intimate with my partner and I’m not doing it as avoidance either. It’s just that I’m not in the mood AT ALL. It makes me super super sad, and feel very sorry for my boyfriend. Then by not being in the mood/wanting to have sex I then get intrusive thoughts about my thoughts “all being true.” That’s the least of my worries, but how do I just get over this? Like I said I’m not doing it as a form of avoidance for ocd, it’s just that I have no libido and wish I did so I can enjoy time with my bf. Any advice?? I miss wanting to be intimate with him.

i just want someone to talk to on here but i’m having no luck. this app has been so comforting when i needed it the most and i am really having a hard time right now. every time i share an intimate moment with my boyfriend, even though i know i enjoy it and feel happy and in love, all of that goes always when i call myself gay after it happens. i feel so unlike myself because of these thoughts because i can no longer enjoy these small moments with my boyfriend without what feels like me purposely calling myself gay. i don’t know what our conscious is supposed to sound like, but whatever the voice is that is calling me is far from it. i get filled with anxiety and fear that i could just be in denial and lying to the boy i love, but my heart and soul and mind don’t match up. since the thoughts have gotten worse, i have been listening more to my heart and seeing how i feel deep in my soul, and i know that i was meant to be with men romantically. i am not opposed to being with women romantically at all; i think women are absolutely stunning and when they are great people, it just makes them more attractive to me, but i still don’t feel like i was meant to be with one long term the way that i feel i am supposed to be with men. sorry for this long post, i just feel better writing these things down because it helps me understand better what i am actually going through and helps me collects my thoughts better.

there was someone saying they were suicidal and deleted their post. please reply don't go

Is anyone here refusing to see a therapist because they’re afraid their fears will turn out to be true ?

One of my friends has become so draining, I don’t know how to politely stop speaking to her. I don’t really have the energy to deal with that situation so I’d rather just put up with her here and there for summer classes but I just wanted to vent about how draining she’s become. She’s so pessimistic it’s too much

Childhood guilt and anxiety Im scared i experienced sexual attraction towards other girls when i was a little girl but grew out of it….i never questioned as a child whether i was lesbian or bi even though i knew what it was. And the last time i remember feeling that was like 9 and it was when i watched my girl friend changed. After that i was so uncomfortable at the thought of naked people. (I was also being sexually assaulted the years prior) And i only ever had romantic crushes on boys and saw them as romantic interests. Im so scared im a lesbian….im so scared. I feel like i am and am just realizing:(

Does anyone have ocd where it feels like the thoughts are telling you to act on intrusive thoughts because you could of acted on them in the past and should of been stronger etc? Really struggling with this! They are starting to convince me I’m stuck and feel so hopeless.

i'm not sure if i'll be here in the end of this year. i can't do this anymore i'm fighting but i'm tired