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Guys is there something we can do when we got tired...we can't do compulsions then what can we do...I need an escape right now...nothing is exciting me...what can I do ??

I have recently started a new job and i have a male colleague. I am so convinced i have a new “crush” on him but i have a boyfriend. I find myself sometimes looking for him and my heart will drop if i was to see him. I’m hoping this anxiety is because i don’t want to have a crush on him. I don’t know if this is my rocd or not. Is it possible for my ocd to convince me i like him and that results in me wanting to be near him even though i love my boyfriend so much. I don’t think i can carry this guilt anymore and i have been considering breaking up with him as i feel like such an awful person. I don’t know what to do i feel so upset

Okay, i hope this is my last post in a long time lol, because i think i may be getting worse due to this. I have what i believe is Incest OCD. I have struggled with this since July 25th, and it has been a complete hell for me. I think/i fear of falling in love with my sister, and it started like an unwanted adrenaline rush when i saw her one morning. Idk why i felt that way, but i havent stopped thinking about it. I have had almost non stop anxiety since that day, i've been ruminating about it and googling and all of those nasty compulsions we all know. I used to have groinals (an extremely powerful arousal sensation, to be precise) that is gone now, when i learned that focusing on them Made it Even more powerful. The thing is... i have been having small times of happiness and numbness nowadays. Like, no anxiety (apparently) at all. I still have these thoughts but... it feels weird, like if i'm accepting them and they don't scare me no more, but still have immense guilt over it. I fear that this happiness/numbness may mean that i'm actually in love with her now or something like that (which i don't want to be true, i swear). I feel guilty over all happiness i get. I even stopped editing videos, playing videogames and hearing music because of this weird "enhightened" happiness that idk what it truly means. I can't truly enjoy anything now. Idk what to think anymore. I feel like i have turned into what i feared the most. I know it's wrong, and i swear I would never do anything to my sister, but this feeling is weird. I don't want it to be true, i feel i Will never be in peace with myself. I have tried to avoid as many compulsions i can (looking at her to check if i feel something, avoiding her...) but i still feel worse than before. I even had suicidal thoughts because i don't like this theme of course, but now these suicidal thoughts are gone as well... Hell, i even remember i had never felt any kind of weird emotion or arousal to my sister before all of this started. I'm trying so hard to convince me this is not me, but my OCD doing bs to my mind. I miss those old times i could be with her without thinking this shit. Any advice will be welcome. I'm trying to be detailed with how i feel because this is just hell for me and i want to know if someone feels remotely the same as me I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist with OCD in only one session, so idk if it's a valid diagnosis. I have had many other obsessions with different themes (Harm/Self-harm intrussive thoughts, obsession over Dementia and Rabies...) , so thats why i hope this may be OCD as well. More recently, i was diagnosed with Severe Depression and Moderate Anxiety by another psychologist. She doesnt think i have OCD as I don't have "physical compulsions" like washing My hands for hours or stuff that bothers all aspects of My life (even though my school is being affected, and of course i try to avoid being with my family or talking/thinking about sex or Even talking to my uni crush, which triggers my anxiety). I hope i wrote all of this correctly, as i'm not a native English speaker. Any advice or story related to this is welcome.

Does anyone else freak out at the store/have to inspect every item to make sure there's nothing "wrong" with it or to make sure no one has "messed with it" somehow? It's become so exhausting to go to a store, sometimes I walk out without the item I was looking for because I saw a spot on it I didn't like

So i have had this incest OCD for a while now. I'm scared rn because i feel no anxiety whatsoever to this thought in this precise moment. I don't want to fall in love with My sister. I won't ever act on it but i'm scared i have fallen... I don't know what to do. I'm going to therapy and to a psychatric Center but i still feel very guilty about all of this.

I’ve posted recently about how my boyfriend Is on a trip for the weekend and I’m really struggling with him gone. I don’t want to be toxic or controlling but I’m having a hard time and wanted him to text me updates about what he’s doing. Im upset he isn’t texting me updates but im not going to tell him because I don’t wanna be toxic and I just am curious of any advice to get more comfortable with him being away and anything to distract me or how to handle it. Me and my ex broke up a few months after he went on a trip and ghosted me for a week (and things went downhill from there) so it might have something to do with that. But anyways a big obsession of mine is worrying that im manipulative or toxic or too hard on him/have too high of expectations (because my same ex couldn’t live up to my standards so I broke up w him) and my mom sometimes makes me feel like I’m too hard on him so how can I avoid doing something that could make him feel bad or like I’m too clingy but also calming myself down. Sorry that was so long winded lol. Any advice helps!

I recently found out that I have POCD. I have always been scared that I am attracted to children and have successfully blocked these thoughts out my entire life, occasionally having intrusive thoughts but verifying that I am not but constantly checking while around children. I believe that this stated when I was about 14, I started experiencing some groinal responses accompanied by distress in regard to sexual orientation and then once when I looked at a baby. My OCD of course tells me that this was not a groinal response but true arousal. In response I distanced myself from children, said I would never have children, and slowly just forgot that it occurred. Since then I have worked as a nurse with children and never experienced anything like that so I thought I must be safe. I recently had a miscarriage, and I was in the park and was looking at some children and started experiencing the groinal response. This was so startling and so distressing. I was so confused and my brain kept trying to figure out what was going on because I haven’t felt like that since I was 14. I didn’t want to google it because I thought I would be sent to prison. I was suicidal for a few days, didn’t know what to do, seeked reassurance for the first time in my husband and mum and then finally googled it and found out about POCD and the groinal response. This gave me reassurance and I was fine for a couple of days, but then thoughts about that experience when I was 14 and questions about true arousal vs groinal response stated to come out and freak me out. I live in a small down and am currently seeing a psychologist, hasn’t been for OCD but now I think I know where these thoughts are coming from. My appointment isn’t for another week and I don’t know what to do. I have been trying to use the uncertainty “maybe, maybe not” technique, but find myself constantly feeling anxious and seeking reassurance from the videos throughout the day that I am definitely doing the right things. I am unable to shut my thoughts up constantly saying maybe maybe not in my head and I don’t know what to do. I know I am experiencing some disassociation, I am unable to be present with my partner and I constantly feel like I’m spiralling. This is my second OCD spiral post the miscarriage, the first was of a different context. I just want to be present, in the moment, and accept the thoughts as they come but I am unsure how to do this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, I am supposed to be going on holidays starting tomorrow and I don’t want to bring this with me.

Okay, this is gonna be pretty long and stuff so just a warning. I’m gonna kinda split it up. So, yeah. Okay. Idk, if this is gonna make any sense, and this is kind of weird, but do you — or like, your intrusive thoughts — ever like “force” — you — yourself to do something sometimes, and like “feel”. Okay, so for example, my whole life, I’ve never really been interested in “dating” and stuff, because it just didn’t make sense to me and because of certain stuff, and blah blah blah, but like when I was a bit younger, I’d get like these “intrusive thoughts” about like “dating” people and whatever, and usually it would be fine, but sometimes I felt like I would start to “act” a certain way or whatever, and start to “do” and “think” things for “attention” even if I wasn’t, and I would like act weird, and “go against” everything I want. Idk. Like, if I thought somebody liked me, or if I just had an intrusive thought about dating stuff, I’d kind of “force” myself to “like” them — not actually, but I’ll explain —, because “just ‘cause”, and it’s kind of what my intrusive thoughts told me, but it’s not what *EYE* wanted. Like, every time that happens, if I think someone likes me, etc. even if *EYE* don’t like them, and it’s not what I stand for, blah blah blah, my head will kind of make me feel like “well, say it anyways”, and “say this” and “say that”, blah blah blah, and then I would have these “fake” feelings that I DON’T really feel, and it would get exhausting. I wouldn’t do it all the time, though. I also just thought that it’s what “they” wanted, and I try and “do stuff” for people even if they don’t ask. I just go above and beyond for people, and exhaust myself. Idk why. That’s just how I am. It’s like I’m “overcompensating” also. And not just this; a whole bunch of other stuff too. It’s annoying. Also, I wouldn’t usually always “tell” them per se, but it’s complicated to explain. It was kind of like an “impulsive” compulsion thing. If that makes sense. Like sometimes I’ll just “DO” stuff just because. And it can get exhausting, because I DON’T really want to do that, I’m just “doing” it because I think it’s what “they” and I’m like “why not”, and it’s usually me thinking “but what if?…” blah blah blah. It’s like, I feel like I have to “confess” everything, but even the “not true” stuff. *The rest in the comments*

I think I need a listening ear

So OCD is a new thing for me and I’m completely unsure about how to navigate this. I’ve been struggling a lot recently with intrusive mental images/thoughts and these have been affecting my life for about a month now. I can’t do anything without it being triggered. Literally anything triggers these thoughts and I can’t stop it. I tell my boyfriend about these as he says he wants to know. I know that these thoughts upset him as they’re sexually inappropriate and I hate them. Some of the thoughts are of people from my past which I have always felt guilt and shame over or people i have seen on social media or shows. Sometimes they are just random too. I suggested one time that I try and not tell him the thoughts as I think that gives it more power and why they’re coming back. He also asks questions about the thoughts which I understand where he’s coming from but that also gives it more power I think. But he said he would want to know and doesn’t want me to start hiding them. I’ve tried so many times to get him to understand and he knows that it’s not in my control he just can’t understand why it’s happening. He always asks “why now” or “why” when I tell him a thought has come up. But to be honest I don’t know and if I did I would stop it from happening. He tells me to fix it and to sort myself out. Im trying my hardest and sometimes it’s tough to be positive about it but I know it’s what my partner needs. He’s usually so supportive of me and there for me but recently he’s just been getting angrier with me. I get that for him it’s a lot but it makes it worse for me as I feel like I’m completely alone with this. I hate having to tell him a thought has come up as I see how much it hurts him. And I do adore him and only have eyes for him so I want him to feel like he is the only one (because he is) but I know the thoughts aren’t helping. I tried explaining to him a mental compulsion I guess that I do and he was trying to understand but he basically said that it sounds like I’m purposefully thinking of something else as well. I know it’s a lot for him and I can’t help the thoughts and I wish I could for him. I’m just really scared about what’s going on in my head and finding help isn’t easy as I’ve moved to the UK to be with him so don’t have my normal doctors or anything. My boyfriend is an amazing guy, I don’t want to paint him as horrible because he isn’t. I know it’s hard for him to understand I just wish that sometimes he’d be a bit more supportive. But I understand that not everyone is capable of being there all the time especially when they’re struggling too. I just want it to stop. I feel so alone with this and like no one else is there for me or wants to be there for me. I’m trying so hard each day to make it better and to be positive about it but it just feels constant in my mind. I want to just sleep all the time. I don’t want to go out, I hardly leave the bedroom anymore. I just know that whenever I wake up I dread the day and wish I could sleep forever.

Hello guys. Is there anyone like me whose intrusive thoughts is caused by fear of not getting sleep? I read in some articles that when we have ocd thoughts, we should let it go and feel the anxiety to increase our tolerance to that thought. But what if you’re trying to sleep? Will the anxiety not let you sleep? Should I push through the anxiety and try to sleep? Or just postpone the thoughts to my next worry time schedule? Please help.😢

i’ve been cheated on and left a 3 year relationship august 18th, its now almost a month later, my dads birthday to be exact. and i went out to eat with my parents. and i kept having the intrusive thought that if my dad cheated on my mom. and now i feel like i can’t trust anybody. because i told my ex how fragile my heart was and everyday for 3 years he reassured me how he would never cheat on me. he said he couldn’t even cheat on me because he only has eyes for me and that i mean more than anything to him. he said why would he want to ruin us. and then guess what?? he ruined us and now my trust is shattered and idk anything anymore.

id love if someone could interact with me, stating their opinions on what i should do & if anyone has ever experienced this. i am in the most healthy, healing, loving, & spiritual relationship ever. i love him so much. we’ve been together officially a month in 2 days and i’ve known him for 6 weeks. my brain is telling me that i’ve terribly cheated on him because i had a brief conversation with someone on social media that i once found attractive. in the moment i had no intention to come off as flirty. it was a subconscious conversation like i’d have with anyone. i think because i have found her attractive that i’ve done something wrong. this person is still attractive and is my type but i’d never presue it. i’ve had a total of 2 very short conversations with this person. i’ve seen them one time in person for about 5 minutes. i do not know this person. when this happened about 2/3 weeks ago, my bf was actually right next to me, that’s how i know it wasn’t like i was trying to do something bad or inappropriate. this did not start bothering me until a week ago. i went a whole week without thinking about it and then all of the sudden my brain is now trying to convince me i did something wrong and that i’m a bad person. my brain is telling me that i should tell him what’s going on and possibly ruin the relationship. or it’s saying i should break up with him. it’s telling me i don’t deserve him. when i’m with him, the girl from social media keeps popping up in my head subconsciously. i’m not forcing this thought, it’s not me who’s thinking this. i feel like i’m fighting myself. none of these things are my reality. i feel as though i shouldn’t have even interacted with her but i can’t go back now. my thoughts are saying “well do you want to be with her. break up with your bf and be with her.” it’s trying to self sabotage. my other compulsion is to block her but that would be so out of pocket because nothing is going on. i keep asking myself how would it feel if it was vise versa & then i start to feel bad & believe that i actually did cheat. in the conversation with her, i made a joke about my bf. me and her both know it was a complete joke (just like girl talk) but if my bf read that, he’d be hurt/wouldn’t understand the joke. so much is going through my head and i cannot release this guilt. does anyone have advice? thank you so much for reading. anything is appreciated. i cant do this anymore.

Hi, I’m a broke college student. I’m in a relationship with someone I care so deeply about but my OCD has latched onto it and distorted my thoughts and feelings about him. More over, my thoughts about feeling like I actually exist. I want to feel alive, I want to love myself and my lover, I want to be okay. But I can’t afford therapy. I want to try ERP but I am not sure where to begin. I’m an artist too and drawing has been so much harder because of it. Music makes me feel the worst. Help?

i haven’t been diagnosed w/ ocd but my therapist says i have like symptoms of it but i recently just stared dealing w/ Pocd (hell) that my therapist says was triggered from the sound of freedom which absolutely breaks my heart bc i was so excited to support the movie but now i feel like it’s one of my biggest regrets. i feel as if i would’ve never watched the movie i would’ve possibly never started dealing w/ this. But my biggest scare now w/ this is having my own kids . i’m F18 and throughout my whole teenhood my biggest goal and dream was to become a mother a GOOD mother. everything i tried doing was motivated by the thoughts of giving my kids the absolute best one day. Now i feel like it’s my biggest fear w/ dealing w/ this and i don’t know how i’d even explain to someone like my bf for example, of the reason why i don’t want to have kids anymore ( though i still really do but i just literally feel like can’t because of this 💔💔) are there any mothers out there w/ Pocd w/ kids out here? how do you cope w/ this? should i even have kids?? i also feel as if it kinda bad rn. i was doing good for a couple weeks and last night it just rushed back for no reason. i’ve learned what groinal responses are ( it absolutely scared the shit out of me before i found out what it was and i was just not okay and sort still am not when it happens. it just feel too real and i end up sobbing god i hate this ) and i feel as if i’m constantly body checking myself especially when i see a cute baby or children tiktok i love babies n kids id never wanna hurt them in such away i rather pass away. i just can’t believe why this this happening i used to be so much more happier before this and i really don’t know how to deal w/ this and what i should do😖💔💔

So I went to my old school and it didn't sucked because I get to go to a field trip. My old friend was there so it wasn't that bad. But I was like so focused on not messing up. To leaving my house alll the way to my school I had thoughts of "being back with my ex" or something like that like wtf? I said multiple times (trying not to panick because I was in public. Usually when I'm alone in my room I scream saying "NO I HAVE BETTER BOYFRIEND" trying to be as detailed as possible so this little shit can understand) I was getting the hang with it reminding these thoughts that I don't want my ex and I want my boyfriend. I was getting anxious and having thoughts and these feelings. Like I felt like those ex thoughts were right or I felt like I wanted them and I started to feel guilty. I knew that I would never leave my boyfriend with my ex! I had these messed up thoughts and it ruined me. It felt like I was going to cheat on my boyfriend. I don't understand. Those thoughts were so confusing and so awful. I tried to think of my boyfriend and remind myself again and again that I'm committed to my boyfriend NOT my ex. I had thoughts of ditching my boyfriend or cheat on him with my ex and it felt real and I was scared and I felt so guilty and sad. I had to figure out and try correcting myself for the ENTIRE trip. I got a hold on them for a awhile but I just felt bad. Did I do something bad? These thoughts felt genuine and real and the feelings felt so I can't describe it. Probably like a urge like the type of feeling of trying not to scratch that mosquito bite idk that probably sound worse. I feel like a bad girlfriend and awful I wish I felt that type of awful way before. It feels like I don't deserve my boyfriend. I told myself many many times that I have a boyfriend and I did NOT want to go to my ex. But ig I didn't do hard enough. There were many what ifs and many not what if. I promised my boyfriend I would never leave him. I would never do that to my boyfriend!! I hate that I don't feel genuine like wth!! This is my boyfriend I do love him dearly.

I don't even know how to put this into words, but lately I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety around my existence. How can I know that I'm "real" like how can I know that what I am experiencing is actually me living. The worst part about it is that no answer that I come up with is helpful because it COULD all be "fake". That terrifies me to no end because what does that mean about me and my life. I don't beleive it but it feels so real sometimes. Like almost a false intuition? It's all making me feel so empty and pointless and I really don't like that. I'm usually very optimistic and upbeat. But I don't even know who I am anymore sometimes.

I visited her over the summer and I had the best time but before I went back I started feeling numb and dissociated. Like I had no feelings, I am back at school and I feel the same way worse even. I feel nothing, I have thoughts like I don’t love her anymore and I feel urges to break up. I have been fantasizing about someone and anytime I see that person my brain is telling me to check if she is pretty, staring at her. I also feel attracted to most girls, I have thoughts that I should experience college life even though deep down I know I don’t want to. It is so difficult because I feel nothing to what my girlfriend says, all I could say is that I am sorry. Even when I say that I struggle to, my mind makes me think I don’t want to be be back to normal and it feels so real it is scary. The same thing happened last year too. I got to school and I started fantasizing about being with someone else, I followed that person and once I knew she didn’t have any interest I was back to sort of normalcy. I don’t know what to do. It is overwhelming. Anyone else feeling like this or have experienced this?

This is my first post on here. My friend recommend the app after I shared my struggles with OCD. I’ve been battling with many forms of OCD since I was 13 (perfectionist OCD, harm OCD, intrusive thoughts, hypochondria). I’m 29 now and feel like the mental health system has failed me. That’s a whole different story but recently I feel like OCD is coming back into my life. I recently began working as a student teacher in a kindergarten classroom and I’m also a graduate student working on my masters degree. My OCD was once so severe that the anxiety it gave me sent me to multiple psych wards and put my life on hold. That was 10 years ago. I feel like it’s coming back again and that scares me. Lately, the OCD that I’ve been experiencing is related to having to have everything be perfect. In particular, having to wear eyeglasses is really really bothering me. It might be a sensory thing too. I was diagnosed with severe dry eyes and can no longer wear contacts. It’s the silliest thing but I’m always thinking about it to the point where I’ll cry because the stress I inflict upon myself is so burdensome. I hate how I look in glasses and they just bother me so much I can’t focus on teaching or school work. If I forget to bring something with me to school I’ll fixate on that constantly throughout the day. I know it’s stupid and you just have to go with the flow but things bother me so much that it really does put me in a state of distress. I’m not sure how this app works but I’m really looking to find solidarity here in addition to coping skills that I haven’t been able to get from my therapist (I’m considering switching to someone who has experience with OCD). Right now I’d say my OCD is a 7/10 on a scale where 10 is completely crippling and you can’t function. I’m nervous as my responsibilities increase, my OCD symptoms will worsen. What has helped anyone who is experiencing a similar situation? Thank you!

My name is Sofie. I have OCD and sometimes it disguised itself with depression or hopelessness. I feel stuck for no reason. It’s like i’m stuck in mud and can’t lift my feet but there isn’t any mud or obstacles. Just life. Everything seems to trigger me back to my roots, an anxious stressed girl. My personality is happy. I’m always “happy,” but no one really knows the struggle in my brain and how something as normal as relaxation can send me into a spiral. I don’t know how to live in the now. I am always thinking about the past and the future simultaneously. For example, if i’m having a really fun day and have work the next day, the fun can be ruined immediately after thinking for a split second about my obligations. I just want to be content. I want to be free.