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I really need someone’s input. And I feel really bad because I feel like I abuse that in another post and the other persons not respond rightfully so. Anyway has anyone ever imagine a scenario and gotten themselves really pissed off or upset or some combination of the two and then that triggers the OCD? I’m scared because I was washing these things at my job I work as a dishwasher. I think they’re for grills where are Japanese barbecue place so you can cook your own food if you want to I’m not sure where exactly is apparatuses go but I have to clean them. And I thought I’m scared I felt a shift inside me and said I do I don’t miss hanging boobs I don’t like them! And I can’t stop thinking about them and say love but I don’t love them I don’t I’m scary simply I don’t simply do I I don’t know I don’t not simply anything I don’t not do but I’m scared it felt like a gearshift but I still don’t feel right and I’m scared I don’t feels even worse like saying the word but I don’t I’m fine I can’t stop thinking about it like I do and I can’t even imagine a guy like doing a push-up without thinking I don’t want hanging I don’t want boobs I’m scared I don’t wanna condition myself too! And I can’t help it like it’s are there but I don’t miss them and find out you make faces like pecs are the really big ones are and then I protested saying not boobs are gross pecs are not at least the patrols that are not really big or not gross I kept saying those aren’t gross but they kind of are to be honest. But what kind of straight person says that kind of thing miss . I don’t miss hanging boobs I don’t even like them! What was that shift

MAJOR, MAJOR, MAKOR POCD TRIGGER WARNING (TALKS ABOUT HEAVY STUFF) PLEASE 18+ I’m tired. I feel horrible. I haven’t been able to watch porn lately without being scared of the person in the video being exploited, kidnapped, or r*ped. I don’t go on shady websites, just pornhub, but it’s horrible. I find myself being really scared ever since I heard a while back about how cp and other stuff was being uploaded on porn hub and that they were doing a lot of investigations and taking down videos. I’m terrified that I at some point in my life saw something like that and didn’t know it was illegal, I’m horrified by wondering. It doesn’t help that a couple of months ago, I was reading confession posts on Reddit, I used to read them to maybe feel better about my own real events, and they sometimes did help. But I read one that was horrifying. It was about a man who was confessing to constantly watching CP and using the dark web to see it, I only read the beginning part and the comments replying to him, but it was horrible. One thing he wrote on there horrified me and has stuck in my mind ever since. He said “even when I’m watching the hardcore stuff I feel…” I shook when I read that, because I’ve never thought about a “hardcore” part of awful crap like that. As if anything beyond CP itself isn’t already the bottom of society, but to imagine it as different categories like in regular porn terrified me. Now I’m being flooded with intrusive images and it’s had me break out in panic attacks and feel incredibly nauseous. I stopped reading confessions on Reddit after that, that was by far the worst confession I’ve ever read. It was disgusting and horrifying. I called my friend afterwards and told how scared I was and he told that I shouldn’t feel guilty for the decisions someone else made who I didn’t even know, and that I need to be able to separate what I read about other people from myself. I’ve never seen CP but these intrusive images are so vivid and terrible, I feel like crawling out of my own skin. I also saw a video on tiktok by this hacker group who take down accounts that bully, harass or put illegal content. And while what they’re doing is great, they posted a video of an account that has been posting cp and we’re telling people to go and report to get it taken down, but they didn’t blur the profile picture of the account and while it didn’t show anything, the profile picture was of a little girl and she seemed scared and wearing makeup, I was horrified and I just scrolled away and logged off of tiktok. I can’t imagine the pain and suffering they face and seeing that little girls face triggered me beyond what you can imagine. I feel dead inside, I ended up blocking those social activist groups and accounts because while what they’re doing is great and are trying to get rid of all that and spread awareness, it just triggers me too much. I’m not asking for reassurance, but this stuff has horrified me so much, and my OCD is trying to convince me of truly horrible and despicable stuff, but idk anymore, I just feel like dying.

Having a very scary night I was praying and asked for Jesus's holy spirit and the OCD tried to switch out his name for the devil. I know it's OCD and I have been telling God that I ment i want Jesus's holy spirit and God does know my heart so I just have to trust that God is taking care of me. I feel sick however when I was begging God to stay with me I was given a verse. Trust in the Lord God with all your heart lean not on your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path straight. Proverbs 3: 5-6 Your feelings are fickle and the devil will try to minipulate them. Do not let him. You are doing so well keep standing in the armour and the light of God let him pave your way. There is no battle he cannot win. I find being in the presence of God calms me. Worship music helps me so much if you search Jesus. (With the full stop) Into Spotify it should come up. Some specific songs that help me are. Broken prayers - piano version By Riley Clemmons Fighting for me By Riley Clemmons Defender By Francesca Battisteli Back to life By Bethel music Scars By I AM THEY. I would love it if you could put your prayer requests Inn the comments ment we can help each other XX.

Tips for dealing with morality/decisions? I recently found something out about a friend from another friend. It distresses me, but I don’t know where to go from here. My OCD is making it hard to make a choice because it’s saying “this should be an easy, black and white choice. You are bad for not instantly getting rid of this person”. I need help figuring out how *I* feel, not how the OCD feels. Does anyone have advice? I feel like utter trash, I won’t lie.

Hello everyone, im struggling with something and i need your opinion. So for years i said to myself that i have suicidal ocd because i have random thoughts and images about that and i dont want to do it, but i always felt that what if its real suicidal thoughts and i just say that its ocd to avoid the pain. So today i did the "search" in me and i found out that sometimes when life is bad i really think that i want to die, and a feeling follows that too. And realizing that i started to feel soo much shame and i felt depressed bc of maybe im i danger and that how dare im thinking about that. And then i felt worse bc i thought about how my family will react to that, what feelings i would give to them. And then i read about suicidal ocd and i found out that all this shame and feelings its ocd, so i was like what the hell?! So the question is can i have both, i mean suicidal thoughts and suicidal ocd? By suicidal though i mean(i dont want to live, life is mean). Its just that but im even affraid that it will be worse thoughts...😅😅 and i dont know how to accept if i have these thoughts bc i feel shameful having these...(maybe im broking the rules but i want this bc where i live theres no one who specialize with ocd and i need this aswer to know the truth if i have ocd or not)

It just feels like I’ll never be able to get the girl of my dreams... everything’s reminding me how single I am, not to mention the HOCD intrusive thoughts... 😞😞😞

Something really stressful is happening to me and I need your advice. in fact tomorrow i will start again the sport i stopped because of the pandemic, cheerleading. in the team there is a person who is lesbian and on whom my hocd it was attached a few years ago and I really want to start again because I like her but I already know that I am going to have a bad time and I don't want that to change what I have with my boyfriend

I don’t wish this crap on any body. The constant fear, anxiousness, guilt & feeling like a terrible person ALL the time

Currently struggling pretty hard :/ I have so many different intrusive thoughts I couldn’t possibly ask for enough advice on this forum, i just hope I can start treatment soon. My fears and anxieties have left me house ridden. I’m unable to socialize and only leave to get my partner to and from work. I can barely go to the grocery store and have developed an eating disorder from my ingredient obsessions. I’ve been unemployed over a year and the idea of feeling THIS paralyzed leaving the house while also being expected to go to work and perform makes me feel ill. I’ve had dermatillomania my entire life and my “nails” are nothing but fingers with teeny unbelievably thin slivers of nail matter left and I have a bad habit of getting lost in my nail biting or taking sharp objects to my face for hours on end. I have to ask my boyfriend are you still alive every few hours. I feel like any angle from which OCD could attack you, I’m being crippled from. I’m uninsured and I have been relying in emergencies on a bottle of beta blockers from three years ago, I have four left and I’m very scared. I’m feeling very low guys. Wishing for relief.

Does anyones OCD make you think that people think your OCD thoughts were real even though they realised how much you were suffering and helped you out of an episode? This obsession is driving me nuts. I am doing erp but think I am obsessing that this episode wont go and it is sticking around for so long this time. When I listen to the erp I dont think I am doing any compulsions but I suppose I am trying to remind myself that these people would never think this of me. I am so sick to death of this obsession now.

Can someone help please? 🆘 I’m really scared I don’t want to lose my love for guys and I don’t wanna start any thing with the opposite of guys. I want the opposite sex I don’t want girls I don’t want the parts! I can’t stop thinking but I don’t want a combination of the two things that’s for sure lol. Sorry just trying to be a little lighthearted but it’s not really working. My palms are sweaty I don’t understand. I said I don’t want you and I’m scared like can I have it I don’t like girls I don’t want to add a team so to speak I want pectorals come back and I keep acting like but I don’t want torpedoes. I don’t want boobs I am scared I almost feel better thinking saying how I don’t want women and focusing on the W like but I don’t want women but I can’t stop thinking of the letter W as though I do. I don’t want women I don’t wanna feel better saying as thought when I don’t!

I’m scared you guys. I don’t want this to be a possibility and I almost said that I am but I’m not really prepared for. Can sexual orientation change? I don’t want to switch or add a team! 🥺 I’m scared I don’t want to I know it’s part of life but I don’t wanna fall out of love with my guy. Definitely don’t wanna add girls to the team I felt funny saying that but I really don’t wanna do it. I wake up arguing with myself which is unfortunately normal but what scares me right now is that I was trying to say guy/guys I’m scared I see these phrases right and that’s one of them. I’m trying to feel better saying but I don’t want women/men I don’t I don’t want women. And yet I’m afraid and I feel better I don’t want to be bisexual but if I’m straight why would I feel better saying that one I don’t wanna I’m scared I don’t want women. I’m scared I feel better saying that and I feel worse leaving them out and I don’t understand what that means! I don’t want women I want guys/men And yet I almost started to get anxious in my palm starting to sweat leaving them out I don’t trust anything and I feel confused I don’t want women! I’m scared and I’m scared I’m so tired I said so what I don’t wanna start liking women I don’t like their parts. And yet my throat closes no I’m leaving them out and I’m simply must be I’m tired and I feel like giving up at and can’t stop I don’t wanna lose my feelings for my guy and I don’t wanna have any I don’t like women’s parts I don’t have any for women they’re not simply anything boobs are not lovely. So I don’t understand how come I feel worse excluding them and I’m afraid of how I felt including I don’t want it I don’t want to feel better saying that I’m sorry I can’t breathe. I don’t don’t want women sexually I don’t want women in any kind of way. I don’t want women! Yeah I’m scared I do I choke up when I expose them I don’t want girls I don’t want to feel it better saying it like it doesn’t I don’t know if it feels right but it’s like for some reason I just have this really strong urge to say it and I said it in my head but I don’t want girls if I’m straight why would I say that in my head? I’m fine I am I don’t wanna look at girls differently I don’t want to see them in my head naked and feel different I don’t want to look at them different I don’t want to change. It almost feels wrong to say no I’m scared I am now I’m not resisting for anything I’m scared it almost why would I feel wrong if I’m straight?! And there’s no if I’m not attractive I’m not interested I’m not I can’t breathe I’m so sorry. I’m not and I don’t understand why would I feel better adding I don’t want women

I’m really struggling this morning. I’m in the last week of graduate school and I am really scared about having a month off before I start my new job. Not having a routine is really hard because I feel like my obsessions get really intense. Does anyone else feel like this? What are some of the things you do to reduce the obsessions when you don’t have routine?

The one thing I don’t know how to do is if I date, how would I let my significant other know about my POCD? I wouldn’t want to keep secrets but I don’t feel like it would be the easiest conversation. Does anyone have advice for how they did so with their significant others?

I need help. Struggling so bad with derealization and I believe I have harm OCD. It’s endless torture everyday and now super mundane things I question. I’m questioning everything about myself

Sometimes I ask myself "Did I always have horrible thoughts like this? We're they always in my life? If so, how come I weren't so focused on it like I am now?" There are so many things I regret when I were younger but at the same time I've done good things. I always strive to be a good person. Not perfect, but good. I always worry that I'm not though. Why does this happen? Why do these thoughts always go to the worst things imaginable? It's never anything polite or positive. Most of the time it's just occupied with negative thoughts based on pretty much anything that would make me sick.

I'd like to hear people's recovery stories with harm ocd. I need some encouragement.

Tell me the story what triggered your OCD the first time? Mine was when I had pneumonia when I was 13 and it was really scary experience so I was afraid that I was going to die.

There are no OCD specialists near me and my insurance doesn’t cover NOCD teletherapy. Would I be better off trying to find a regular therapist, or performing ERP by myself at home? My OCD is not severe at this point in time, I don’t know if that makes a difference

Pls help.:: Soooo my bf and I took a break 2 weeks ago cuz I kept accusing him and being crazy. And he needed me to stop. He cried and everything to me. I took that break (it was a week) to focus on me and feel good alone in case he decided to leave me for good. So he didn't & we got back together. It's been 2 weeks and it's been good and I been good. Tonight tho we had a small minor occurrence, he unfollowed this girl next to me and then I noticed he re followed her and so I asked him if he was sure he did it and he got mad at me. I didn't tell him I saw it cuz that woulda caused more stuff. This was on me for going back to that toxic behavior. Clearly I didn't learn too much. It turned into a hugeeee thing and he practically said the same thing that he is afraid to leave me because he doesn't feel like I'm stable and that I'd lose my job and apartment and all of that. He thought of leaving me but didn't cuz he loves me and all these things. In the end he just said I don't even wanna talk about it I'm just gonna have to deal with this, I'm a sucker and u just walk all over me. And that my ocd was ruining our relationship & he should've left me a long time ago. Some background for the last 2 1/2 years we were on&off exclusive but not OFFICIAL and he was fucking up constantly talking to girls and hooking up with them! (We been dating officially seriously committed for a year and he hasn't messed up once) but my point is I didn't give up on him cuz I knew he had some issues and he got better and I gave him that chance. He hasn't fully given me a chance and now knowing he just expects the worst from me and is afraid to leave me makes me more worried now. Like what if I get better and he still leaves or he just will end up being with me even tho he just feels scared to leave? Like wth. I'm so confused and upset and he's asleep so I can't even figure it out. We are such an amazing couple but these issues have arouse a lot and it has to do with me not behaving this way. When I say he changed, mean he CHANGED SO MUCH. He is such a different man and amazing to me and I never wanna lose him but I also don't want him with me for the wrong reasons, being he's just scared I won't be ok.