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working to conquer OCD
Tried to practice ERP today. I was able to handle some things. It just seems so scary. I hope I can continue to improve but worried something may trigger me. Yesterday i had a bad episode to the point of being in tears. I dont like when it gets to that point. Hoping to stay strong. Any tips from anyone on here that helped them stay motivated?
so i’m 17, and i have a friend who’s 14. we’ve become really close throughout the past few months, and we both like girls so when we first met, we had a bit of a crush on each other. i was 16 then, but when i found out she was 14 i didn’t feel interested anymore because i thought that she was too young to date. for a bit of back story, i went through severe childhood sexual abuse when i was younger which causes me to not let anyone to touch me even today. i haven’t held my own mother in a long time, i’ve never kissed anyone or cuddled, done anything sexual, etc. we’ve been trying to help each other through our own traumas, and she suggested that i let her start trying to touch me more, which i was apprehensive about but i thought maybe it would be good. she started holding my hand when we walked down the hall, hugging me, and we cuddled with each other both of the two times we hung out. i felt fine about it, but the second time we cuddled just felt off, and i think she was thinking of it as a romantic thing and it made me uncomfortable. in the middle i told her i didn’t want to do it anymore and she got mad at me which prompted me to just deal with it and let her cuddle me again. i feel upset about this, because i was uncomfortable, but also because i feel like i’ve made her feel romantically toward me by allowing her to do this and i’m the older one so i should’ve told her no ? it’s been bothering me obsessively, i’m scared that i led her on and the age difference in general makes me uncomfortable
Does the stop sign technique work to brush off the intrussive thoughts? I have intrussive thoughts when using markers or pens an inmediate rush of fear hits me and it feels like i wrote something very inapproriate, the fear that i wrote and posted something bad on paper or on the internet in comments,, it feels real like it actually happened, the psychiatrist diagnosed me obsessive compulsive disorder , and i started zoloft today
I would like to talk to someone who gets porn addiction and wont judge me.
Please again!!! As a HOCD sufferer I just suddenly thought a lesbian music vid was a bit cute and I did not get appropriately disgusted or anxious and I'm worried that means I'm lesbian or something!!! :(
Past porn addiction and moral scrupulosity. I REALLY need someone to advise me with this. When I was young I was exposed to porn on the internet, I wish I had never found porn websites but all through my teen years I viewed porn on the internet and developed an addiction to it but I was young and naive back then about porn. When I started learning about porn, reading online articles etc (on fightthenewdrug website/nofap etc) and I learnt about how immoral and unethical porn is I stopped viewing porn completely. I have a huge distaste for it and I'm disgusted by it. I've not watched porn in 2 years, I never will again. I'm glad the addiction to it has completely vanished but in place of it is shame. So much shame and guilt, and combined with my obsessive personality I have severe moral scrupulosity over it. I constantly feel immoral for ever watching it, I randomly remember porn videos from years ago that I came across and I have constant "what ifs?". "What if I should go back to that site, find the video and report it to the site to makesure everything was ethical and safe, consensual?". The thing my brain isnt understanding is that yes that side of porn does exist (the unethical side) but it's not that clear where and if and so you cant be sure or save anybody or anything. But I feel hyper responsible for some reason. This is a constant thing. I only viewed porn on the usual popular safe websites and as far as I know they comply with the law and regulate their sites but how can they be sure everyone and everything was and is safe? I just cant and idk how to accept this. I just dont know how to get rid of the memory of that part of my life. Most people feel so proud and happy they've kicked a porn addiction out of their life, I feel constant regret, shame and immoralness for ever even going onto pornwebsites in the first place and forming an addiction. It feels worse that I'm a girl as most people think only boys can get addicted to porn.
I just can’t get past what I’ve done which makes me scared I’m bi or lesbian
I am going through the most bizarre theme right now and I don’t even want to post it because it’s so random and embarrassing
Hello! I have a phobia of a particular number which I associate with Satan and it gives me severe stress and anxiety. It causes me to have to do hours of rituals to feel “okay” again, and I try to avoid it at all costs. Today, as I was driving (which is also an ocd trigger for me) I saw a license plate with that number. I freaked out and have been in crisis mode for the past couple hours. I was wondering if anyone had tips on how to move forward after being at a high anxiety state for so long. Numbers are unavoidable and I was wondering if people had tips or tricks for coping? Thank you
You think that they're might be a link between being raised catholic and some people having ocd entirely based on the doubt of if they did something or not and the guilt that causes?
Having a fear of statutory rape. In 2009 I met a woman on the internet who was Native American but her age was older than me. I was 23 years old and she was 26. It was the first time I lost my virginity. I never saw her ID but a couple of things I do know, people search indicates she is of the age she said she was, her appearance appears age appropriate, she has a boyfriend now who is near her age, her best friend she went to highschool with is older than me, she purchased cigarettes and alcohol indicating she presented an ID, she had a kid who was around 7 years old, drove a car and worked at a sport mart as a cashier. Part of the fear is she was a known liar who claimed to speak many languages, be an artist, she claimed she had been raped by others (not me) and would have me verbally attack them. She was married as well. I never was allowed to meet her family. Part of my fears are what if the person I met wasnt really who she said she was or lied about her age or someone who looked like her? I know this is irrational thinking and that likely this is nearly impossible but it creates fear and has been having a negative impact on me as well as my wife. I think the fear is the sex offender registry or consequences.
Please someone in here that’s bi write I. This comment
Anyone else have Health OCD around the fear of psychosis? It’s made me so hyperaware of all sounds and movements it makes me feel like I’m slipping. My psychiatrist has assured me that I am far from psychosis, but how have others overcome this fear?
Please answer this. Do you sometimes just get a "bad feeling". Like not intrusive thoughts but a bad feeling and then intrusive thoughts related to your theme but you cant really make sense of them if you try to explain them out loud. I have moral scrupulosity, so I just randomly get a stomach sinking feeling, and then I will get intrusive thoughts but I cant really explain the event or reason why I feel how I feel, it doesn't make much logical sense. I hope I'm not the only one that feels like this.
Tell me your point of view on this, I beg you. I feel like for me it is all or nothing. I have this small rituals, like placing things in the certain way and I can easily skip them. But the main danger is feeling "dirty". I can be dirty all day without consequences, but If l'm "dirty" while going to sleep, the only soultion in the morning is to clean everything. Wash the sheets, clothes, things that I touched. What I'm trying to say is that if I fail, even in the littlest thing, the only solution for my ocd will be to clean everything. Cleaning just a little won't help. Everything or nothing. Cleaning everything means starting exercises from the beginning, cleaning takes hours or a whole day. And I live together with my boyfriend, he does not know, but just his presence helps me a lot. It's because of him that I feel like I could go all in. I can't change sheets every day. So I feel like I can't go step by step, I feel like I need to go all in. In ERP you face being uncomfortable step by step, but as I say, there is no mild version for me. Small rituals doesn't matter, lately I skip them all the time and I'm fine with it. But if I let go of just one thing connected to being dirty, do not fix it in the evening and go to sleep dirty, it will jump to the extremum. And as time will pass by, I will touch more things, wear more clothes, so there will be more and more dirty things around me and I will need to ignore it. If I want to keep exercising, I need to resist cleaning sheets, clothes and myself (cleaning myself as a compulsion), so I will be uncomfortable all the time. Every single minute. If I do this one step, the only step there is, the only that matters, I will be extremely uncomfortable all the time. Not for a while, it won't be a short exercise. Because of my boyfriend, I feel like I can go all in and somehow it will turn out fine, just because he is with me, loves me and I love him and I want for us to have a "normal", happy life. I believe I can't go step by step, because there is just this ultimate step of going to bed "dirty". I'm ready to go all in, but I wonder, is it even possible to turn out fine this way?
Real event OCD is taking over me right now. I can't decide what's rational and what's irrational. I feel as though the anxiety it suitable punishment for my stupid behaviour, particularly an event from when I was 14, but I hate the effect it has on others around me. I just want to be a good person, and make people happy. I want to feel like I deserve love and friendship, but this one event is holding me back right now. It makes every kind thing I do seem worthless. I don't think I deserve anything good in life. I spend my time Googling constantly to see if anyone has experienced anything similar, but everyone else seems to have been younger when it happened to them, and I feel as though I should have known better at 14. I don't know how to carry on.
I feel so fat like is it bad that I'm 14 and I'm 5 feet 3ish inches and I weigh 51 kg (112 lbs)? I feel so bad and my body dismorphia goes crazy at the thought that Im fatter than other females. I'm just drinking black coffee to reduce my appetite but I still have the need to deprive myself even more. Is that gonna be ok?
Can’t even talk to guys without getting extreme anxiety I get extreme anxiety with guys I don’t know but I’m comfortable with my friends can anyone relate? I know I don’t want guys but I can’t help but look at them
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OCD doesn't have to
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